{"id":8181,"date":"2016-05-25T07:00:42","date_gmt":"2016-05-25T11:00:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=8181"},"modified":"2016-05-20T10:04:20","modified_gmt":"2016-05-20T14:04:20","slug":"entitlement-the-fall-out-of-helicopter-parenting","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2016\/05\/entitlement-the-fall-out-of-helicopter-parenting.html","title":{"rendered":"Entitlement: The Fall Out of Helicopter Parenting"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-3358\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2012\/09\/anxious-woman-300x199.jpg\" alt=\"anxious woman\" width=\"300\" height=\"199\" \/>Megan is a 23-year-old who grew up with a great deal of anxiety about her school\u00a0performance. Her parents admit, they were too involved\u00a0and consider themselves helicopter parents.<\/p>\n<p>But now, as Megan is moving into young adulthood, she is highly sensitive to any demand or issue that doesn&#8217;t fit her view of life. Her coping skills are lacking.<\/p>\n<p>Megan&#8217;s parents look back and think, did we make excuses for hr too often, bail her out when she needed to feel consequences? Did we blame her teachers, rescue her when she felt bad too many times?<\/p>\n<p>These are good questions to ask. Coddled children often become entitled ones. They expect other people to constantly fix their problems. Problems are externalized&#8211;\u00a0due to someone else&#8217;s actions versus personal responsibility.<\/p>\n<p>What&#8217;s the fix?<\/p>\n<p>Stop coddling and empowering them to be victims. Shielding them from the realities of the world does not help them cope and build resiliency. It it through disagreement, we find out what we believe. It is through working through differences that we learn to get along with others who don&#8217;t think and feel as we do. It is often through struggle that we learn to be strong and make corrections in our ways of doing things. Failure is part of building resilience.<\/p>\n<p>Universities are supposed to be places to prepare students for the real world. Instead, we are extending this helicopter parenting to the campuses, creating safe spaces, micro aggressions and demanding students who no longer exercise common sense. Talk to your young adults about this influence and the long term effects of &#8220;safe spaces.&#8221; Political correctness has run amuck and creating entitled people who can&#8217;t cope with life.<\/p>\n<p>So parents, look at your influence now. Tell\u00a0your children to deal with that difficult teacher, the kid who doesn&#8217;t think the same, the neighbor who chides them for bad behavior. Encourage them to work through their own problems. Stop doing for them. Think how you became a problem-solver &#8211;no one rescued you from the real world.<\/p>\n<p>Tell your college kids to stop whining and focus on their studies. Question the policies of universities and colleges that are offended by food that is racist (true story!). Parents, we need a hard look as to our contributions to the problem of raising entitled kids. Where we can make a difference now, let&#8217;s do it. Stop coddling and rescuing.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Megan is a 23-year-old who grew up with a great deal of anxiety about her school\u00a0performance. Her parents admit, they were too involved\u00a0and consider themselves helicopter parents. But now, as Megan is moving into young adulthood, she is highly sensitive to any demand or issue that doesn&#8217;t fit her view of life. Her coping skills&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":419,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[914],"tags":[3408,3521,3321,3519,1972],"class_list":["post-8181","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-family-relationships-2","tag-college-campuses","tag-entitled-children","tag-helicopter-parenting","tag-overparenting","tag-political-correctness"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Entitlement: The Fall Out of Helicopter Parenting<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2016\/05\/entitlement-the-fall-out-of-helicopter-parenting.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Entitlement: The Fall Out of Helicopter Parenting\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Megan is a 23-year-old who grew up with a great deal of anxiety about her school\u00a0performance. Her parents admit, they were too involved\u00a0and consider themselves helicopter parents. But now, as Megan is moving into young adulthood, she is highly sensitive to any demand or issue that doesn&#8217;t fit her view of life. Her coping skills&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2016\/05\/entitlement-the-fall-out-of-helicopter-parenting.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Doing Life Together\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/drlindamintle\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2016-05-25T11:00:42+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2016-05-20T14:04:20+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/files\/2012\/09\/anxious-woman-300x199.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Linda Mintle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@drlindamintle\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Entitlement: The Fall Out of Helicopter Parenting","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2016\/05\/entitlement-the-fall-out-of-helicopter-parenting.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Entitlement: The Fall Out of Helicopter Parenting","og_description":"Megan is a 23-year-old who grew up with a great deal of anxiety about her school\u00a0performance. Her parents admit, they were too involved\u00a0and consider themselves helicopter parents. But now, as Megan is moving into young adulthood, she is highly sensitive to any demand or issue that doesn&#8217;t fit her view of life. 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Dr. Linda\u2019s fun personality and expertise comes through whether she\u2019s helping her audience stress less or make peace with their thighs! Dr. Linda has her Ph.D. in Urban Health and Clinical Psychology and is a national expert on mental health. She has specialized in the treatment of eating disorders, anxiety, depression and pain management. With 30 years of clinical experience working with couples, families and individuals, she brings her common-sense approach to people who want to live in positive mental health. Dr. Linda is also a bestselling author with 21 book titles to her credit, a radio host of the Dr. Linda Mintle show, professor, national speaker, winner of the Mom\u2019s Choice Award, a national news consultant, featured writer for Beliefnet and hosts her own website. Her academic appointments keep her abreast of current research in her areas of expertise. Her media experience includes seven years as the resident expert for ABC Family\u2019s Living the Life television show and regular appearances on network television and radio. It is often said that being with Dr. Linda is like having coffee with a friend. She makes the complicated issues of relationships and mental health easy to understand and applicable to everyday living. The ease she has with people, coupled with her clinical training and experience makes her a sought-after speaker on college campuses, conferences and special events. Whether she is doing a TV skit with Tim Conway or discussing teen violence with Queen Latifa, Dr. Linda will entertain, educate and integrate faith and mental health in everyday living. Check out her latest book Hope and Healing for Anxiety, a whole-person approach to eliminate anxiety. .","sameAs":["https:\/\/drlindamintle.com\/","https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/drlindamintle\/","https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/drlindamintle\/","https:\/\/x.com\/drlindamintle"],"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/author\/lmintle"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8181","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/419"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8181"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8181\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8194,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8181\/revisions\/8194"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8181"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8181"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8181"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}