{"id":780,"date":"2011-11-07T08:00:08","date_gmt":"2011-11-07T13:00:08","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/doinglifetogether\/?p=780"},"modified":"2012-03-03T12:31:40","modified_gmt":"2012-03-03T17:31:40","slug":"responding-to-unfair-treatment","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2011\/11\/responding-to-unfair-treatment.html","title":{"rendered":"Responding to Unfair Treatment"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Personally, I have had to deal with a situation where someone was treated unfairly. There was no apology and no indication that the offense would ever be acknowledged. And confronting the offense was not a safe thing to do. So how do you handle an injustice that you can\u2019t address directly?<\/p>\n<p>Our flesh wants to lash out when we\u2019ve been treated poorly and our culture promotes revenge. But as Christians, there is a clear path to dealing with offense and injustice that doesn\u2019t go along with our flesh or the culture.<\/p>\n<p>First, you acknowledge the hurt and anger you feel. I am hurt that someone willingly chose not to do the right thing because he was afraid and would not stand up for his conviction of what was right. The more I think about the situations, the angrier I become.\u00a0 So thinking about it over and over does not help.<\/p>\n<p>Second, I must deal with the anger. I know, life isn\u2019t fair, people do not always act the way they are supposed to, and sometimes people are scared to stand up for what is right. Intellectually, I understand why someone would do the wrong thing. My feelings have to catch up with my head.<\/p>\n<p>The Bible is clear that we can be angry but not sin. Scriptural guidelines tell me to not give full vent to my anger (Proverbs 29:11), to not seek revenge (Romans 12:19), to forgive (Matthew 6:14), not to stay angry (Colossians 3:8), give the anger to God (1 Peter 5:7) and not take offense (Proverbs 12:16). Behind the anger is hurt.<\/p>\n<p>Next, I choose to forgive the person and refuse to hang on to the offense. This is an act of obedience to God. As I release the person with forgiveness, I ask God to heal the hurt I feel. I meditate on 1 Peter 2:22-23\u2014Jesus left his case in the hands of God. That is a good place to leave the offense\u2014in the hands of God.<\/p>\n<p>Finally, I need to release the person from my judgment. God sees what he did and will deal with him. I do not have to be the Holy Spirit for that person, God already is! My job is to pray for the offender and continue to allow God to touch my heart when the hurt surfaces.<\/p>\n<p>The process of letting go isn\u2019t easy when the offense impacts your life in a major way. But, asking God to help and refusing to hang on to unforgiveness will end in healing.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center\">\u2028<strong>Is there an offense or injustice you are hanging on to that you need to release today?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center\"><strong>For more help, check out my book, <em>Breaking Free from Anger and Unforgiveness<\/em>. <\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Personally, I have had to deal with a situation where someone was treated unfairly. There was no apology and no indication that the offense would ever be acknowledged. And confronting the offense was not a safe thing to do. So how do you handle an injustice that you can\u2019t address directly? Our flesh wants to&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":419,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[913,914,917,916],"tags":[75,531,79,532,53,77,530,302],"class_list":["post-780","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-couple-relationships","category-family-relationships-2","category-friend-relationships","category-god-relationship","tag-anger","tag-hostility","tag-injustice","tag-judgement","tag-relationships","tag-revenge","tag-unfair","tag-unforgiveness"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Responding to Unfair Treatment<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2011\/11\/responding-to-unfair-treatment.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Responding to Unfair Treatment\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Personally, I have had to deal with a situation where someone was treated unfairly. 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Her media experience includes seven years as the resident expert for ABC Family\u2019s Living the Life television show and regular appearances on network television and radio. It is often said that being with Dr. Linda is like having coffee with a friend. She makes the complicated issues of relationships and mental health easy to understand and applicable to everyday living. The ease she has with people, coupled with her clinical training and experience makes her a sought-after speaker on college campuses, conferences and special events. Whether she is doing a TV skit with Tim Conway or discussing teen violence with Queen Latifa, Dr. Linda will entertain, educate and integrate faith and mental health in everyday living. 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