{"id":6325,"date":"2014-06-25T07:00:47","date_gmt":"2014-06-25T11:00:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=6325"},"modified":"2014-06-16T12:14:02","modified_gmt":"2014-06-16T16:14:02","slug":"high-conflict-at-home-how-you-are-hurting-your-kids","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2014\/06\/high-conflict-at-home-how-you-are-hurting-your-kids.html","title":{"rendered":"High Conflict at Home? How You Are Hurting Your Kids"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong><a href=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/files\/2013\/11\/fighting.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-5558 size-medium\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2013\/11\/fighting-300x199.jpg\" alt=\"fighting\" width=\"300\" height=\"199\" \/><\/a><\/strong>It\u2019s a typical Friday night and mom and dad are at it again. Little Jill covers her ears. Billy runs under the table and tries to hide and Angie cries.<\/p>\n<p>The kids are stressed and can\u2019t take their parents constant fighting. All that stress is physical and emotionally hurting them. Their heart rates beat faster. Their blood pressure rises and their bodies are flooded with stress hormones, depleting their immune systems and making them more susceptible to infections and illness.<\/p>\n<p>Their learning is also impacted. Their grade point averages drop and they do poorly on tests. All the conflict is predictive of academic failure. And the more intense the conflict, the worse children do. In fact, teachers will tell you that kids from high conflict homes are more likely to be expelled from school, become pregnant as teens and live in poverty.<\/p>\n<p>Emotionally, living in a hostile home puts kids at risk for psychiatric disorders like depression and anxiety. They have trouble regulating their emotions, knowing how to calm themselves down and can\u2019t attend as well to others. All that bickering creates a powerful sense of a loss of control. And those kids take their childhood stress into their adults lives and relationships.<\/p>\n<p>Bottom line, when parents constantly fight and have high conflict in their homes, kids suffer. Also, please note, it isn\u2019t divorce that does the damage as much as the high conflict fighting. So, if you want to help your kids, stop fighting. Learn to deal with your partner is ways that are respectful and honoring. Solve your problems without all the intensity and drama. Your kids\u2019 physical, emotional and relationship health depends on it!<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It\u2019s a typical Friday night and mom and dad are at it again. Little Jill covers her ears. Billy runs under the table and tries to hide and Angie cries. The kids are stressed and can\u2019t take their parents constant fighting. All that stress is physical and emotionally hurting them. Their heart rates beat faster.&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":419,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[914],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6325","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-family-relationships-2"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>High Conflict at Home? How You Are Hurting Your Kids<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2014\/06\/high-conflict-at-home-how-you-are-hurting-your-kids.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"High Conflict at Home? How You Are Hurting Your Kids\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"It\u2019s a typical Friday night and mom and dad are at it again. Little Jill covers her ears. Billy runs under the table and tries to hide and Angie cries. The kids are stressed and can\u2019t take their parents constant fighting. All that stress is physical and emotionally hurting them. Their heart rates beat faster.&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2014\/06\/high-conflict-at-home-how-you-are-hurting-your-kids.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Doing Life Together\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/drlindamintle\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2014-06-25T11:00:47+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2014-06-16T16:14:02+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/files\/2013\/11\/fighting-300x199.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Linda Mintle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@drlindamintle\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"High Conflict at Home? 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Her media experience includes seven years as the resident expert for ABC Family\u2019s Living the Life television show and regular appearances on network television and radio. It is often said that being with Dr. Linda is like having coffee with a friend. She makes the complicated issues of relationships and mental health easy to understand and applicable to everyday living. The ease she has with people, coupled with her clinical training and experience makes her a sought-after speaker on college campuses, conferences and special events. Whether she is doing a TV skit with Tim Conway or discussing teen violence with Queen Latifa, Dr. Linda will entertain, educate and integrate faith and mental health in everyday living. 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