{"id":5538,"date":"2013-11-04T07:45:29","date_gmt":"2013-11-04T12:45:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/doinglifetogether\/?p=5538"},"modified":"2015-11-12T12:47:01","modified_gmt":"2015-11-12T17:47:01","slug":"10-reasons-to-forgive-even-when-you-dont-want-to","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2013\/11\/10-reasons-to-forgive-even-when-you-dont-want-to.html","title":{"rendered":"10 Reasons To Forgive Even When You Don&#8217;t Want To"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.freedigitalphotos.net\/images\/agree-terms.php?id=100160809\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-5541\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2013\/11\/upset.jpg\" alt=\"upset\" width=\"400\" height=\"265\" \/><\/a>You&#8217;ve been hurt, wronged, treated unfairly, or even abused. The natural response it to seek revenge or want to hurt the person back. But Jesus was radical when he talked to us about how we are to respond to someone who offends or hurts us. And psychology has finally caught up to the benefits of choosing to forgive.<\/p>\n<p>Here are 10 reasons why forgiveness is so important?<\/p>\n<p>Forgiveness&#8230;.<\/p>\n<p>1)\u00a0\u00a0 <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Is a choice<\/span>. You can choose to stay stuck and hold on to anger, bitterness, resentment or you can choose to move forward by letting go.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>2)\u00a0\u00a0 <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Is not about what people deserve<\/span>. None of us deserves to be forgiven yet God forgives us.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>3)\u00a0\u00a0 <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Does not mean you condone what a person did.<\/span> It means the opposite. You acknowledge the hurt and still choose to forgive which is why it is so powerful.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>4)\u00a0\u00a0 <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Is an individual ac<\/span>t. It takes two to reconcile but one to choose the route of forgivness.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><i>5)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/i>Is commanded by Christ, not an option. <i>Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying \u2018I repent,\u2019 you must forgive them. Luke 17:4<\/i><i><\/i><\/p>\n<p><i>\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n<p>6)\u00a0\u00a0 <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Helps your physical health<\/span> by lowering blood pressure and stress and making you a reduced risk for substance abuse and depression.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>7)\u00a0\u00a0 <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Opens the door to reconciliation<\/span>. You can\u2019t force someone to reconcile because you don\u2019t have control over his\/her actions but you can open the door to the possibility by beginning with forgiveness.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><i>8)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/i><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Is on-going<\/span><i>. \u00a0Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, \u201cLord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?\u201d Jesus answered, \u201cI tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. <\/i><i>Matthew 18:21-22<\/i><\/p>\n<p><i>\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n<p>9)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0<span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Forgiveness goes against our natural instincts to get revenge or even the score<\/span>.<\/p>\n<p><i>Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God\u2019s wrath, for it is written: \u201cIt is mine to avenge; I will repay,\u201d says the Lord.<\/i><b><i>\u00a0<\/i><\/b><i>On the contrary:<\/i><\/p>\n<p><i>\u201cIf your enemy is hungry, feed him;if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.\u201dDo not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Romans 12:19-21<\/i><\/p>\n<p><i>\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n<p>10) \u00a0<span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Forgiveness means leaving our case in the hands of God.<\/span> 1 Peter 2:22-23<\/p>\n<p><i>\u201cHe committed no sin,<\/i><b><i> <\/i><\/b><i>and no deceit was found in his mouth.\u201d When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly.<\/i><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>For more help breaking free, <a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Breaking-Free-From-Anger-Unforgiveness\/dp\/0884198952\/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1383569411&amp;sr=8-1&amp;keywords=breaking+free+from+anger+and+unforgiveness\" target=\"_blank\">Breaking Free from Anger and Unforgiveness<\/a> by Dr. Linda Mintle<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2013\/01\/BFS_Anger_LG.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-4059\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2013\/01\/BFS_Anger_LG.jpg\" alt=\"BFS_Anger_LG\" width=\"170\" height=\"190\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>You&#8217;ve been hurt, wronged, treated unfairly, or even abused. The natural response it to seek revenge or want to hurt the person back. But Jesus was radical when he talked to us about how we are to respond to someone who offends or hurts us. And psychology has finally caught up to the benefits of&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":419,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[914],"tags":[303,201,81,79,2578,2577,1271,2579,77,2580],"class_list":["post-5538","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-family-relationships-2","tag-bitterness","tag-forgiveness","tag-hurt","tag-injustice","tag-letting-of-offense","tag-offenses","tag-reconciliation","tag-resentment","tag-revenge","tag-wronged"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>10 Reasons To Forgive Even When You Don&#039;t Want To<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/Faiths\/Galleries\/10-Ways-To-Forgive-When-You-Dont-Want-To.aspx\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"10 Reasons To Forgive Even When You Don&#039;t Want To\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"You&#8217;ve been hurt, wronged, treated unfairly, or even abused. The natural response it to seek revenge or want to hurt the person back. But Jesus was radical when he talked to us about how we are to respond to someone who offends or hurts us. And psychology has finally caught up to the benefits of&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/Faiths\/Galleries\/10-Ways-To-Forgive-When-You-Dont-Want-To.aspx\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Doing Life Together\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/drlindamintle\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2013-11-04T12:45:29+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2015-11-12T17:47:01+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/doinglifetogether\/files\/2013\/11\/upset.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Linda Mintle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@drlindamintle\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"10 Reasons To Forgive Even When You Don't Want To","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/Faiths\/Galleries\/10-Ways-To-Forgive-When-You-Dont-Want-To.aspx","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"10 Reasons To Forgive Even When You Don't Want To","og_description":"You&#8217;ve been hurt, wronged, treated unfairly, or even abused. 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Her media experience includes seven years as the resident expert for ABC Family\u2019s Living the Life television show and regular appearances on network television and radio. It is often said that being with Dr. Linda is like having coffee with a friend. She makes the complicated issues of relationships and mental health easy to understand and applicable to everyday living. The ease she has with people, coupled with her clinical training and experience makes her a sought-after speaker on college campuses, conferences and special events. Whether she is doing a TV skit with Tim Conway or discussing teen violence with Queen Latifa, Dr. Linda will entertain, educate and integrate faith and mental health in everyday living. 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