{"id":21698,"date":"2023-08-29T08:00:20","date_gmt":"2023-08-29T12:00:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=21698"},"modified":"2023-08-27T08:36:01","modified_gmt":"2023-08-27T12:36:01","slug":"how-to-stop-the-nagging","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2023\/08\/how-to-stop-the-nagging.html","title":{"rendered":"How to Stop the Nagging"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2023\/08\/ai-generated-8153759_1280-scaled.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-21704\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2023\/08\/ai-generated-8153759_1280-scaled.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"768\" height=\"512\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><em>\u201cWhy don\u2019t you ever pick up your clothes? Could you please just listen to me for once?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How did you react to reading the statements above? Does it sound like nagging?<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Nagging is a relationship problem that could lead to more serious problems if it is not addressed. Nagging might be funny in sit coms, but not in real life as it is a negative communication pattern. And it doesn\u2019t work to make things better.<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When talking about nagging, perspective is important. If something isn&#8217;t getting done exactly the way or when you want it, don\u2019t focus on disappointment. Instead, think about why you appreciate your partner<strong>.<\/strong> This shift from disappointment to gratitude will stop the nagging pattern. Gratitude tells your brain to focus on the positive and away from the negative.<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Next, consider Scripture: In Matthew, we are told that we will be accountable for every careless word. Words are important. Avoid words that make a person feel belittled, incompetent or not good enough. Negative words wear on a relationship. Be responsible for your words and don\u2019t just let them fly out of your mouth when frustrated. We are instructed to control our tongue due to the power of words.<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">To bring home the negativity of nagging, remember the familiar Bible story about Samson and Delilah. In Judges 16:16, we are told, \u201cWith such nagging, she prodded him day after day until he was sick to death of it.&#8221; This Scripture is in reference to Delilah\u2019s persistent nagging to find out the source of Samson\u2019s strength. She pushed and pushed until he was willing to give up his secret. The badgering was intense. And we know the story didn\u2019t end well! Thus, nagging may get a response, but at a cost. In Samson\u2019s case, it was his strength. In our relationships, we erode the intimacy bond through nagging.<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The best spiritual help for nagging is to deal with the root of the issue. Are you expecting things from others they can&#8217;t give? Are you wanting others to be perfect? Whatever the issue, be forgiving when others let you down. Know that God is the only one who will never do that. When ignored or things are not getting done, talk about what happened and how you felt. Try to work out a plan or strategy for the future. Then let it go. Forgiveness keeps the heart soft and open to reconciliation. A relationship built on honesty, feedback, trust, love and yes, forgiveness, is one that will last. Consequently, replace the nagging with better communication and problem-solving. Most of all, be careful with your words.<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u201cWhy don\u2019t you ever pick up your clothes? Could you please just listen to me for once?\u201d How did you react to reading the statements above? Does it sound like nagging? Nagging is a relationship problem that could lead to more serious problems if it is not addressed. Nagging might be funny in sit coms,&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":419,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[913],"tags":[2226,1161,798,335,1382,939,53,7337,2514],"class_list":["post-21698","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-couple-relationships","tag-arguing","tag-complaining","tag-complaints","tag-criticism","tag-intimacy","tag-nagging","tag-relationships","tag-stop-nagging","tag-yelling"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How to Stop the Nagging<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Nagging is a relationship problem that could lead to more serious problems if it is not addressed. It is a negative communication pattern.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=21698\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How to Stop the Nagging\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Nagging is a relationship problem that could lead to more serious problems if it is not addressed. It is a negative communication pattern.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=21698\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Doing Life Together\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/drlindamintle\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2023-08-29T12:00:20+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2023-08-27T12:36:01+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2023\/08\/ai-generated-8153759_1280-scaled.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Linda Mintle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@drlindamintle\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"How to Stop the Nagging","description":"Nagging is a relationship problem that could lead to more serious problems if it is not addressed. It is a negative communication pattern.","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=21698","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"How to Stop the Nagging","og_description":"Nagging is a relationship problem that could lead to more serious problems if it is not addressed. It is a negative communication pattern.","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=21698","og_site_name":"Doing Life Together","article_author":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/drlindamintle\/","article_published_time":"2023-08-29T12:00:20+00:00","article_modified_time":"2023-08-27T12:36:01+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2023\/08\/ai-generated-8153759_1280-scaled.jpg"}],"author":"Linda Mintle","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@drlindamintle","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=21698","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=21698","name":"How to Stop the Nagging","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=21698#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=21698#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2023\/08\/ai-generated-8153759_1280-scaled.jpg","datePublished":"2023-08-29T12:00:20+00:00","dateModified":"2023-08-27T12:36:01+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/#\/schema\/person\/1e16a9c7332cfcc5b5d89e4ba3a36142"},"description":"Nagging is a relationship problem that could lead to more serious problems if it is not addressed. It is a negative communication pattern.","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=21698#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=21698"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=21698#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2023\/08\/ai-generated-8153759_1280-scaled.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2023\/08\/ai-generated-8153759_1280-scaled.jpg"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=21698#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"How to Stop the Nagging"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/","name":"Doing Life Together","description":"Relationship Doctor, Mental Health, Emotional Wellness, Relationship Advice &amp; Entertainment","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/#\/schema\/person\/1e16a9c7332cfcc5b5d89e4ba3a36142","name":"Linda Mintle","description":"It is rare that a trained academic who speaks passionately to the heart of people providing real answers to real life problems is so relatable. Dr. Linda\u2019s fun personality and expertise comes through whether she\u2019s helping her audience stress less or make peace with their thighs! Dr. Linda has her Ph.D. in Urban Health and Clinical Psychology and is a national expert on mental health. She has specialized in the treatment of eating disorders, anxiety, depression and pain management. With 30 years of clinical experience working with couples, families and individuals, she brings her common-sense approach to people who want to live in positive mental health. Dr. Linda is also a bestselling author with 21 book titles to her credit, a radio host of the Dr. Linda Mintle show, professor, national speaker, winner of the Mom\u2019s Choice Award, a national news consultant, featured writer for Beliefnet and hosts her own website. Her academic appointments keep her abreast of current research in her areas of expertise. Her media experience includes seven years as the resident expert for ABC Family\u2019s Living the Life television show and regular appearances on network television and radio. It is often said that being with Dr. Linda is like having coffee with a friend. She makes the complicated issues of relationships and mental health easy to understand and applicable to everyday living. The ease she has with people, coupled with her clinical training and experience makes her a sought-after speaker on college campuses, conferences and special events. Whether she is doing a TV skit with Tim Conway or discussing teen violence with Queen Latifa, Dr. Linda will entertain, educate and integrate faith and mental health in everyday living. Check out her latest book Hope and Healing for Anxiety, a whole-person approach to eliminate anxiety. .","sameAs":["https:\/\/drlindamintle.com\/","https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/drlindamintle\/","https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/drlindamintle\/","https:\/\/x.com\/drlindamintle"],"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/author\/lmintle"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21698","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/419"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=21698"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21698\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21722,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21698\/revisions\/21722"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=21698"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=21698"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=21698"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}