{"id":17257,"date":"2022-01-15T10:00:44","date_gmt":"2022-01-15T15:00:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=17257"},"modified":"2022-01-08T18:22:30","modified_gmt":"2022-01-08T23:22:30","slug":"holding-on-to-hate","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2022\/01\/holding-on-to-hate.html","title":{"rendered":"The Way To Stop Hate"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2022\/01\/hate-1216881_1280.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-17284 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2022\/01\/hate-1216881_1280.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1280\" height=\"668\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Hate is a strong emotion that we see expressed far too often. It is also a dark emotion that has no place in the heart of a Christian. You can dislike someone or not agree on major issues, but hate should not be embraced. Otherwise, it will become a cancer in your soul.<\/p>\n<p>Today we celebrate the legacy of Martin Luther King, Jr. who fought hate through love. Let&#8217;s honor his legacy by examining our heart and\u00a0do everything we can to remove hate in our circles. Let&#8217;s call each other to love. To do so, ask yourself, is there hate for a person or a group that you secretly harbor?<\/p>\n<p>So many people express hate on social media, in the streets and through divisive behaviors, targeting anyone who is different. We are surrounded by haters. The impact of this vitriol on a community and personal relationships is significant. In fact, consider what hate does to the brain.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Hate in the brain:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>When someone is in love, the parts of the brain involved in judgment and reason deactivate. This is why we often say that love makes someone &#8220;stupid.&#8221; They lose their good sense. By contrast, hate heightens your judgment. It activates regions in the brain associated with aggression. The motor parts of your brain move those aggressive feelings into action. This is why holding on to hate is dangerous. The more a person hates, the more prone he or she is to take action. Haters\u00a0calculate their moves and plan revenge. Reason and rumination are both involved.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Reasons we hate:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>There are many reasons why people find themselves in this negative state of emotion&#8211;they have been deeply\u00a0hurt by someone, fear\u00a0others who are different, or feel empty and target others as a way to deal with the\u00a0void. Sometimes, we hate because others remind us of negative things about ourselves and we project those feelings on to others. Hate can also be bred by betrayal and by envy. It can become all-consuming and affect a person physically as well as spiritually and emotionally. In the end, hate leads to bitterness.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Hate is learned:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>We\u00a0learn to hate somewhere\u2014whether the source is\u00a0online, a family system, disturbed friends, violent video games\u2014something began to build hate as a way to deal with others and\/or ourselves. But hatred is a sin of the heart. For the Christian, it is understood to be as dangerous as an\u00a0act of murder. We are directed to rid ourselves of this destructive emotion.<\/p>\n<p>The science of hate tells us that people who feel hate often beleive they can also be loving and kind. But hate is a cancer and brings only destruction.\u00a0\u201cWhoever hates his brother is in the darkness and walks in the darkness, and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes\u201d (1 John 2:11).<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rid yourself of hate:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>There is no positive benefit or place for hate unless you direct that emotion toward evil.\u00a0Psalm 97:10. \u201cLet those who love the Lord hate evil.\u201d The way to get out of that darkness is to walk in the light and allow God to transform your heart. Forgive those who have hurt you. Let go of bitterness and the need for revenge. Stop thinking and ruminating about personal injustices. Rather, ponder how can you be part of a solution and begin\u00a0to open your heart to love.<\/p>\n<p>In today&#8217;s world, we need a healed land and healed hearts. Yet in my lifetime, we have moved completely away from national conversations that include the\u00a0role of faith in a nation that was founded on faith in God. Instead, we only discuss secular solutions that fall short and are incapable of changing a hateful person&#8217;s heart.<\/p>\n<p>Only God changes hearts. Only God can take a terrorist like Saul and transform him to Paul who loved those he once hated. If we want to stop hate, we need\u00a0God&#8217;s transforming power. And sadly, that&#8217;s not a message we hear anywhere in today&#8217;s analyses of our hate problem.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Hate is a strong emotion that we see expressed far too often. It is also a dark emotion that has no place in the heart of a Christian. You can dislike someone or not agree on major issues, but hate should not be embraced. Otherwise, it will become a cancer in your soul. Today we&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":419,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[925],"tags":[732,5992,5998,5995,4351,6001],"class_list":["post-17257","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-mintle-mentions","tag-hate","tag-hate-and-the-brain","tag-impact-of-hate","tag-love-not-jhate","tag-mlk-day","tag-reasons-for-hate"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>The Way To Stop Hate<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Hate is a strong emotion! It is also a dark emotion. You can dislike someone or not agree on major issues, but hate should not be embraced.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"noindex, nofollow\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The Way To Stop Hate\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Hate is a strong emotion! It is also a dark emotion. You can dislike someone or not agree on major issues, but hate should not be embraced.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2022\/01\/holding-on-to-hate.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Doing Life Together\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/drlindamintle\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2022-01-15T15:00:44+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2022-01-08T23:22:30+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2022\/01\/hate-1216881_1280.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Linda Mintle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@drlindamintle\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"The Way To Stop Hate","description":"Hate is a strong emotion! 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Her media experience includes seven years as the resident expert for ABC Family\u2019s Living the Life television show and regular appearances on network television and radio. It is often said that being with Dr. Linda is like having coffee with a friend. She makes the complicated issues of relationships and mental health easy to understand and applicable to everyday living. The ease she has with people, coupled with her clinical training and experience makes her a sought-after speaker on college campuses, conferences and special events. Whether she is doing a TV skit with Tim Conway or discussing teen violence with Queen Latifa, Dr. Linda will entertain, educate and integrate faith and mental health in everyday living. 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