{"id":10801,"date":"2019-04-29T06:00:37","date_gmt":"2019-04-29T10:00:37","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?p=10801"},"modified":"2019-04-27T06:24:58","modified_gmt":"2019-04-27T10:24:58","slug":"cleanse-change-mood","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2019\/04\/cleanse-change-mood.html","title":{"rendered":"Give This Up, Boost Your Positivity!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-10803\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/258\/2019\/04\/man-390339_1920-300x199.jpg\" alt=\"man-390339_1920\" width=\"300\" height=\"199\" \/>Something is really bothering you. So you complain. Complaints are about the difference we see between our expectations and reality. We expect something and then it doesn&#8217;t come true. But does complaining\u00a0really help?\u00a0After all, it\u00a0is \u00a0easy to complain\u00a0and it\u00a0comes naturally to many of us.\u00a0Has\u00a0complaining \u00a0become a habit like brushing your teeth? Are you so used to doing it, you don&#8217;t realize how often complaints come out of your mouth?<\/p>\n<p>In fact, look at your social media or your text messages. Are they filled with complaints or venting about your frustrations? If so, it might be time to make a change that could boost your positivity and lower your stress.\u00a0Complaining and venting both lead to feeling stressed and negative about life. They take us no where but down in the dumps.<\/p>\n<p>Begin, by\u00a0not\u00a0thinking about what you don&#8217;t want or like. Instead, think about what you do want and do like! It&#8217;s a small shift in thinking but one that can make a big difference.<\/p>\n<p>For a period of time (maybe a day, week or a month), go without complaining at all. Consider this a type of complaining cleanse. Be\u00a0very intentional to stop complaining. \u00a0Give up the idea that you are victim. Tell yourself to let go of things that don&#8217;t matter all that much.\u00a0Be more adaptive and roll with the punches.<\/p>\n<p>Now, replace your complaints with gratitude. Keep a gratitude journal and\u00a0watch your negativity change to optimism. If you don&#8217;t like to journal, notice your comments, stop them and insert a gratitude or positive statement. Focusing away from complaints and on to gratitude will change your mood for the better.<\/p>\n<p>And if you need to fix an injustice through a\u00a0complaint, try doing so\u00a0by starting with a positive, give the complaint, and then end with a positive. Make the complaint descriptive and to the point. Then, go back to focusing on what is good in your life. See if you can make gratitude your default. Giving up regular complaining and replacing it with gratitude is the goal.<\/p>\n<p>Are you up for the challenge? A complaint cleanse? Let me know if you try it and the difference it makes.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Something is really bothering you. So you complain. Complaints are about the difference we see between our expectations and reality. We expect something and then it doesn&#8217;t come true. But does complaining\u00a0really help?\u00a0After all, it\u00a0is \u00a0easy to complain\u00a0and it\u00a0comes naturally to many of us.\u00a0Has\u00a0complaining \u00a0become a habit like brushing your teeth? Are you so used&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":419,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[913,914,917],"tags":[4410,798,1761],"class_list":["post-10801","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-couple-relationships","category-family-relationships-2","category-friend-relationships","tag-complainer","tag-complaints","tag-negativity"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Give This Up, Boost Your Positivity!<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2019\/04\/cleanse-change-mood.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Give This Up, Boost Your Positivity!\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Something is really bothering you. So you complain. Complaints are about the difference we see between our expectations and reality. We expect something and then it doesn&#8217;t come true. But does complaining\u00a0really help?\u00a0After all, it\u00a0is \u00a0easy to complain\u00a0and it\u00a0comes naturally to many of us.\u00a0Has\u00a0complaining \u00a0become a habit like brushing your teeth? Are you so used&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2019\/04\/cleanse-change-mood.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Doing Life Together\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/drlindamintle\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2019-04-29T10:00:37+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2019-04-27T10:24:58+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/files\/2019\/04\/man-390339_1920-300x199.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Linda Mintle\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@drlindamintle\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Give This Up, Boost Your Positivity!","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2019\/04\/cleanse-change-mood.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Give This Up, Boost Your Positivity!","og_description":"Something is really bothering you. So you complain. Complaints are about the difference we see between our expectations and reality. We expect something and then it doesn&#8217;t come true. But does complaining\u00a0really help?\u00a0After all, it\u00a0is \u00a0easy to complain\u00a0and it\u00a0comes naturally to many of us.\u00a0Has\u00a0complaining \u00a0become a habit like brushing your teeth? Are you so used&hellip;","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2019\/04\/cleanse-change-mood.html","og_site_name":"Doing Life Together","article_author":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/drlindamintle\/","article_published_time":"2019-04-29T10:00:37+00:00","article_modified_time":"2019-04-27T10:24:58+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/files\/2019\/04\/man-390339_1920-300x199.jpg"}],"author":"Linda Mintle","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@drlindamintle","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2019\/04\/cleanse-change-mood.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2019\/04\/cleanse-change-mood.html","name":"Give This Up, Boost Your Positivity!","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2019\/04\/cleanse-change-mood.html#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2019\/04\/cleanse-change-mood.html#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/files\/2019\/04\/man-390339_1920-300x199.jpg","datePublished":"2019-04-29T10:00:37+00:00","dateModified":"2019-04-27T10:24:58+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/#\/schema\/person\/1e16a9c7332cfcc5b5d89e4ba3a36142"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2019\/04\/cleanse-change-mood.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2019\/04\/cleanse-change-mood.html"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2019\/04\/cleanse-change-mood.html#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/files\/2019\/04\/man-390339_1920-300x199.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/files\/2019\/04\/man-390339_1920-300x199.jpg"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/2019\/04\/cleanse-change-mood.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Give This Up, Boost Your Positivity!"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/","name":"Doing Life Together","description":"Relationship Doctor, Mental Health, Emotional Wellness, Relationship Advice &amp; Entertainment","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/#\/schema\/person\/1e16a9c7332cfcc5b5d89e4ba3a36142","name":"Linda Mintle","description":"It is rare that a trained academic who speaks passionately to the heart of people providing real answers to real life problems is so relatable. Dr. Linda\u2019s fun personality and expertise comes through whether she\u2019s helping her audience stress less or make peace with their thighs! Dr. Linda has her Ph.D. in Urban Health and Clinical Psychology and is a national expert on mental health. She has specialized in the treatment of eating disorders, anxiety, depression and pain management. With 30 years of clinical experience working with couples, families and individuals, she brings her common-sense approach to people who want to live in positive mental health. Dr. Linda is also a bestselling author with 21 book titles to her credit, a radio host of the Dr. Linda Mintle show, professor, national speaker, winner of the Mom\u2019s Choice Award, a national news consultant, featured writer for Beliefnet and hosts her own website. Her academic appointments keep her abreast of current research in her areas of expertise. Her media experience includes seven years as the resident expert for ABC Family\u2019s Living the Life television show and regular appearances on network television and radio. It is often said that being with Dr. Linda is like having coffee with a friend. She makes the complicated issues of relationships and mental health easy to understand and applicable to everyday living. The ease she has with people, coupled with her clinical training and experience makes her a sought-after speaker on college campuses, conferences and special events. Whether she is doing a TV skit with Tim Conway or discussing teen violence with Queen Latifa, Dr. Linda will entertain, educate and integrate faith and mental health in everyday living. Check out her latest book Hope and Healing for Anxiety, a whole-person approach to eliminate anxiety. .","sameAs":["https:\/\/drlindamintle.com\/","https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/drlindamintle\/","https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/drlindamintle\/","https:\/\/x.com\/drlindamintle"],"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/author\/lmintle"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10801","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/419"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10801"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10801\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10804,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10801\/revisions\/10804"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10801"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10801"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/doinglifetogether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10801"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}