{"id":4449,"date":"2020-02-19T23:35:46","date_gmt":"2020-02-19T23:35:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/?p=4449"},"modified":"2020-02-19T23:35:46","modified_gmt":"2020-02-19T23:35:46","slug":"its-okay-to-tell-someone-youre-depressed","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/2020\/02\/its-okay-to-tell-someone-youre-depressed.html","title":{"rendered":"It&#8217;s Okay To Tell Someone You&#8217;re Depressed"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-71 \" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/376\/2014\/08\/compassionate-mother-300x150.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"362\" height=\"181\" \/><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s okay to tell someone you&#8217;re depressed. In fact, talking about depression is the start of getting help, of being seen.<\/p>\n<p>But the person you choose to tell must be okay with hearing about depression. Depression can be very dark, and not everyone wants to hear the darker details.<\/p>\n<p>The person should be non-judgemental, willing to listen to everything you have to say, and be ready to help you. That help shouldn&#8217;t put you or the person at risk. And you shouldn&#8217;t ask the person to keep the fact you&#8217;re depressed a secret.<\/p>\n<h3 class=\"p3\"><span class=\"s1\"><strong>Talking is important.<\/strong><\/span><\/h3>\n<p class=\"p4\"><span class=\"s1\">Talking about depression is important. Talk lets you get out emotions and ideas that are jumbled together in a confusing muddle of self talk. When you talk with someone, negative self talk has nowhere to hide. It&#8217;s exposed for what it is.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\"><span class=\"s1\">Talking to a friend, family member, or a mental health professional forges a connection to the world. Depression isolates people from one another. It&#8217;s an invisible barrier between you and others who seem &#8216;normal.&#8217; Sometimes a person doesn&#8217;t realize he or she is depressed. For example, grief takes a person through several emotional stages. But a grieving person can easily get stuck at one of the stages. This complicated grief can develop into severe depression, especially if the person only thinks he\/she is just sad.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h3>How to talk to someone depressed.<\/h3>\n<p class=\"p4\">\u201cDo you want to talk?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\">&#8220;Do you feel like talking?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;How can I help you?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\">These are good ways to start a conversation. By asking how you can help, you&#8217;re giving power back to the person. Don&#8217;t be pushy about talking. Don&#8217;t expect the person to suddenly open up, or to snap out of depression. Depression doesn&#8217;t work that way. Instead, give hope by promising to be there for the person.<\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\">&#8220;I\u2019m here if you want to talk. I love you.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\">&#8220;Look forward, past your pain, and see it won\u2019t always be this way.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/files\/2014\/08\/Teen_Depression_Treatment.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-58\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/376\/2014\/08\/Teen_Depression_Treatment-300x200.jpg\" alt=\"Teen_Depression_Treatment\" width=\"300\" height=\"200\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<h3 class=\"p4\"><span class=\"s1\"><strong>Don&#8217;t promise to keep depression a secret.<\/strong><\/span><\/h3>\n<p class=\"p4\"><span class=\"s1\">Depression should never be kept secret. Unfortunately, it happens often.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\"><span class=\"s1\">Depression still carries a lot of stigma. In many cultures, mental illness is shameful. <\/span><span class=\"s1\">For others, it\u2019s about the potentially negative reaction at workplace, a club or organization. There&#8217;s shame by association which can cause families to withdraw needed support. Finally, there is the person considering suicide.<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\"><span class=\"s1\">If someone who is depressed starts talking about ending it all, or how it would be better if he\/she didn&#8217;t exist, you need to let a medical professional or<span style=\"color: #0000ff;\"><a style=\"color: #0000ff;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/2019\/09\/action-plan-mental-health-first-aid.html\"> trained adult<\/a><\/span> know. You&#8217;re not expected to be a mental health specialist. C<\/span><span class=\"s1\">ontact the national mental health hotline or a local mental health organization.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\"><span class=\"s1\">You&#8217;re not betraying the person. You may feel guilty or\u00a0 loose the trust or friendship of the person, but you did the right thing.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\"><span class=\"s1\">Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-273-8255 for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.\u00a0 (<a href=\"http:\/\/www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org\"><span class=\"s2\">http:\/\/www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org<\/span><\/a>)<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/files\/2014\/08\/phonesuicideprevention.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-53\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/376\/2014\/08\/phonesuicideprevention-300x198.jpg\" alt=\"phonesuicideprevention\" width=\"300\" height=\"198\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Find me on twitter @tereziafarkas<\/p>\n<p>Or my website:<a href=\"http:\/\/www.tereziafarkas.com\"> http:\/\/www.tereziafarkas.com<\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp; It&#8217;s okay to tell someone you&#8217;re depressed. In fact, talking about depression is the start of getting help, of being seen. But the person you choose to tell must be okay with hearing about depression. Depression can be very dark, and not everyone wants to hear the darker details. The person should be non-judgemental,&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":578,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8,231,233,10],"tags":[4,312,12,158,227,175,6],"class_list":["post-4449","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-depression-help-2","category-emotional","category-healing","category-suicide-prevention","tag-depression-help","tag-depression-talk","tag-emotional-health","tag-healing","tag-mental-health","tag-suicide-prevention","tag-terezia-farkas"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>It&#039;s Okay To Tell Someone You&#039;re Depressed - Depression Help<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"It&#039;s okay to tell someone you&#039;re depressed. 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Terezia is a reiki master, psychic medium, and certified channeller. Visit Terezia Farkas on Twitter @tereziafarkas Website: http:\/\/www.tereziafarkas.com Honours: Alberta Lt. Governor Circle on Mental Health and Addictions award. Bell Let's Talk Social Media Ambassador 2017. CAMH (Canadian Addictions and Mental Health) 150 Difference Makers nominee. 2014 Global Crisis of Depression Summit at Kings Place in London on November 25, 2014, which included speakers Kofi A Anan, the 7th former Secretary General of the UN.","sameAs":["http:\/\/www.tereziafarkas.com","http:\/\/on.fb.me\/1zSE4WB","https:\/\/x.com\/tereziafarkas"],"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/author\/tfarkas"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4449","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/578"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4449"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4449\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4461,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4449\/revisions\/4461"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4449"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4449"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4449"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}