{"id":306,"date":"2014-12-31T06:26:53","date_gmt":"2014-12-31T06:26:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/?p=306"},"modified":"2020-01-19T20:28:47","modified_gmt":"2020-01-19T20:28:47","slug":"how-can-we-help-friends-and-loved-ones-with-depression","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/2014\/12\/how-can-we-help-friends-and-loved-ones-with-depression.html","title":{"rendered":"How Can We Help Friends And Loved Ones With Depression?"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"depression<\/a>
photo courtesy of Globe and Mail<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

I’m sharing a Special to\u00a0The Globe And Mail<\/a>\u00a0‘Have Your Say: How Can We Help Friends and Loved Ones With Depression?’ (Dec.30, 2014)\u00a0<\/em>Craig and Mark Kielburger asked me as an expert on dealing with depression\u00a0to give a brief comment. Get involved in the conversation by either going to the original article or leaving a comment below.<\/p>\n

One in five Canadians will experience some form of mental illness in their lifetime, and half of those will have clinical depression. Toronto\u2019s Centre for Addiction and Mental Health estimates that 230,000 people in Ontario, alone considered taking their own life in 2013.<\/p>\n

Mental health is a complex and uncomfortable topic to broach with even our closest friends and relatives. From noticing symptoms and gently encouraging professional help, to providing support for those with a diagnosis, many of us don\u2019t step in to offer our time and care because we\u2019re unsure of how to do so in a respectful and helpful way. Too often, we don\u2019t even know what to say to start the conversation.<\/p>\n

Experts agree that having a supportive community is an important factor in coping with depression\u2014and given how pervasive this disease is, we need to get more comfortable with discussing it.<\/p>\n

We\u2019ve asked experts to weigh in, below, on how we can best support our friends and loved ones who have depression. And because almost all of us are touched by mental health in some way, we want to know what lessons you have learned, too. If you\u2019ve suffered from depression, how have friends and family helped you? And what didn\u2019t work? If you\u2019ve supported someone with mental illness, what advice would you give?<\/p>\n

Our hope is that if we all become more informed about what good support for depression looks like, we\u2019ll be more likely to reach out to someone we care about who could use our care.<\/p>\n

This week\u2019s question: How can we best support friends and loved ones with depression?
\nTHE EXPERTS:<\/p>\n

Sarah Hamid-Balma, director of mental health promotion, Canadian Mental Health Association, B.C. division<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cLet them know you\u2019ve noticed changes, you\u2019re concerned and you want to help. Listen. Don\u2019t judge. Don\u2019t give advice. Don\u2019t diagnose. Don\u2019t pretend you\u2019re in their shoes. Just be there for them.\u201d<\/p>\n

Dr. Lephuong Ong, registered psychologist, Vancouver<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cAsk how he or she would prefer to be supported. Many prefer to have someone listen and validate rather than jumping in and providing advice or offering solutions. Others may want a friend or family member to attend appointments with them. Some people may be uncomfortable sharing how they feel but appreciate you accompanying them on walks.\u201d<\/p>\n

Terezia Farkas, author, Heart of Love Evolution \u2013 Surviving Depression<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n

\u201cYou might be alarmed or disturbed by what you hear. Accept it but don\u2019t promise to keep anything secret. A confidante listens and then knows when to ask others for help, preferably a trained medical professional. You\u2019re not betraying the person. You may be saving a life.\u201d<\/p>\n

Dr. Stan Kutcher, Sun Life Financial chair in adolescent mental health, Dalhousie University, Halifax<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cIf you\u2019re not sure whether your teen\u2019s negative emotional state is a part of the usual growing up, don\u2019t be afraid to respectfully share your concerns. Pick a time when everyone is calm and collected. Express your affection and care. Identify your own worries and concerns. Ask your teen what they think and go from there. Sometimes it takes a few conversations to get to the point of convincing them to seek help.\u201d<\/p>\n

Have Your Say: How can we help friends and loved ones with depression?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I’m sharing a Special to\u00a0The Globe And Mail\u00a0‘Have Your Say: How Can We Help Friends and Loved Ones With Depression?’ (Dec.30, 2014)\u00a0Craig and Mark Kielburger asked me as an expert on dealing with depression\u00a0to give a brief comment. 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