{"id":1167,"date":"2016-01-28T18:15:01","date_gmt":"2016-01-28T18:15:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/?p=1167"},"modified":"2016-04-28T19:10:08","modified_gmt":"2016-04-28T19:10:08","slug":"young-black-and-bipolar","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/depressionhelp\/2016\/01\/young-black-and-bipolar.html","title":{"rendered":"Young, Black and Bipolar"},"content":{"rendered":"

https:\/\/youtu.be\/7F_Li6dpMWY<\/a><\/h3>\n

The one question I needed to be asked as a black woman with bipolar disorder…<\/h3>\n

by\u00a0Ivy McQuain<\/a><\/p>\n

I believe being black with a mental illness is one of the hardest things to accept in the black community. Why? Because having a mental illness only means you\u2019re crazy. That\u2019s it. In my experience, there\u2019s no room for understanding. There\u2019s no acceptance. You\u2019re classified as crazy and then you\u2019re forgotten. How do I know? Because I have <\/span>bipolar disorder<\/a>,\u00a0and for 11 years I refused to get help because I didn\u2019t want my family and my peers to think I was crazy.<\/span><\/p>\n

I had accomplished a lot when I was diagnosed. I was a college graduate, wife, mother of two small children, business owner and so much more. So I hid the fact that in 2004, I was told I had bipolar disorder. I was ashamed, embarrassed and angry that mental illness was threatening to tear apart my world. No one asked me if I was OK when I disappeared for months at a time and isolated myself from things. No one questioned when I\u2019d go days without eating or sleeping. No one asked about why I would get aggressive or about any other of my erratic behaviours.<\/p>\n

All I wanted was for someone to ask me how I was really doing. Do I need help with something? Am I OK? Anything. No one did. Instead, they just thought, \u201cOh, that\u2019s how she is.\u201d That label stuck with me as I ruined relationships, employment and business opportunities and other great blessings. I plowed through life like a bull in a china shop. But while\u00a0I was losing my battle to be mentally stable, it seemed like no one cared. It\u2019s as if black people didn\u2019t have mental issues. We\u2019re either crazy, cursed or no good.<\/p>\n

Imagine that.<\/p>\n

No one bothered to ask me the right questions. No one considered that I might need help. No one asked, \u201cYou\u2019re acting out. Do you need to go see a psychologist or a mental health counsellor?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

That\u2019s the one question I wish someone had asked me. That question would have changed the course of my life. That question would have made me take a real look at my behaviour, and could have driven me to get the help I so desperately needed. Instead, it wasn\u2019t until my primary doctor noticed something in me didn\u2019t seem right that I finally saw a mental health counsellor. And even then, after I received my diagnosis, I refused to get treatment because when I told my husband and mother, they rejected the idea.<\/p>\n

They didn\u2019t know how much I needed to be asked, \u201cWhat can we do to help you?\u201d \u201cWhere can you get help?\u201d \u201cWhat does it mean to be bipolar?\u201d<\/p>\n

Those questions could have helped establish my support system. But I fought alone, trying to determine what was real and what my mind was twisting up. I experienced so much devastation because I was alone.<\/p>\n

But I don\u2019t blame them. I blame stigma. I blame societal ideations that I believe say only white people have mental illness. I blame the lack of education and the health disparities that still plague minority communities. These are the things that keep us from asking the questions to get help.<\/p>\n

I finally started to get help in April of this year. I got tired of losing a battle with stigma.\u00a0Now, I\u2019m on the road to recovery.\u00a0Now, I want others to know they can get the help they need.\u00a0Now, I\u2019m transparent and share my story because I suffered for so long in silence and denial.<\/p>\n

Now, it\u2019s my time to lead others into the light to make their tomorrow a better place to be.<\/p>\n

\"ivy<\/a><\/p>\n

Twitter: \u00a0@tereziafarkas <\/a>\u00a0@<\/a>ivynmcquain<\/a>\u00a0 #bipolardisorder \u00a0#depression \u00a0#blackwomanheal\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The one question I needed to be asked as a black woman with bipolar disorder… by\u00a0Ivy McQuain I believe being black with a mental illness is one of the hardest things to accept in the black community. Why? Because having a mental illness only means you\u2019re crazy. That\u2019s it. In my experience, there\u2019s no room…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":578,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[146,8,102,97],"tags":[5,30,4,158,6],"class_list":["post-1167","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bipolar-disorder","category-depression-help-2","category-motivation","category-inspiration","tag-beliefnet","tag-bipolar","tag-depression-help","tag-healing","tag-terezia-farkas"],"yoast_head":"\nYoung, Black and Bipolar - Depression Help<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"noindex, nofollow\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Young, Black and Bipolar - Depression Help\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"The one question I needed to be asked as a black woman with bipolar disorder… by\u00a0Ivy McQuain I believe being black with a mental illness is one of the hardest things to accept in the black community. 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