{"id":920,"date":"2009-03-16T19:16:00","date_gmt":"2009-03-16T19:16:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/deaconsbench\/2009\/03\/a-reader-writes.html"},"modified":"2009-03-16T19:16:00","modified_gmt":"2009-03-16T19:16:00","slug":"a-reader-writes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/deaconsbench\/2009\/03\/a-reader-writes.html","title":{"rendered":"A reader writes"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>This showed up this afternoon in the comments of <a href=\"http:\/\/deacbench.blogspot.com\/2007\/06\/catholic-wedding-from-hell.html\">a post from nearly two years ago<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p> I&#8217;m a Catholic, my fiance is not religious. He never had any sort of mention of God in his life and doesn&#8217;t seem to care much about it. We have decided to have a Catholic wedding and will be meeting the Deacon on Friday. Recently my fiance viewed a video of my friends wedding which was also Catholic. Now here is my question. How do I ease my fiance into the spirituality of all of this? He is completely scared now of the entire ceremony and doesn&#8217;t seem to really want to go through with it, yet he insists &#8220;it&#8217;s fine.&#8221; I don&#8217;t want to feel like I&#8217;m forcing him into anything and I am not sure how to approach the whole thing. I know this isn&#8217;t an advice site but I googled what to do and came across your blog&#8230;Any ideas would be great.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>  Well, from my perch on The Bench, I&#8217;m hesitant to make a judgment without knowing more.  But speaking generally: if a bride-to-be is anxious about easing her fiance into the &#8220;spirituality of all of this,&#8221; there could be big trouble ahead.  I&#8217;m not sure they&#8217;re on the same wavelength.  And the last thing she should be trying to do is to convince him to take part in something he doesn&#8217;t really believe in.<\/p>\n<p>Any thoughts?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This showed up this afternoon in the comments of a post from nearly two years ago: I&#8217;m a Catholic, my fiance is not religious. He never had any sort of mention of God in his life and doesn&#8217;t seem to care much about it. We have decided to have a Catholic wedding and will be&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":365,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[17,20],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-920","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-sacraments","category-this-and-that"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>A reader writes - The Deacon&#039;s Bench<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/deaconsbench\/2009\/03\/a-reader-writes.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"A reader writes - The Deacon&#039;s Bench\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"This showed up this afternoon in the comments of a post from nearly two years ago: I&#8217;m a Catholic, my fiance is not religious. 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We have decided to have a Catholic wedding and will be&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/deaconsbench\/2009\/03\/a-reader-writes.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"The Deacon&#039;s Bench\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2009-03-16T19:16:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"deacon greg kandra\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"A reader writes - The Deacon&#039;s Bench","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/deaconsbench\/2009\/03\/a-reader-writes.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"A reader writes - The Deacon&#039;s Bench","og_description":"This showed up this afternoon in the comments of a post from nearly two years ago: I&#8217;m a Catholic, my fiance is not religious. 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