{"id":168,"date":"2009-09-18T10:37:00","date_gmt":"2009-09-18T10:37:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/deaconsbench\/2009\/09\/three-things-a-pastor-can-never-say.html"},"modified":"2009-09-18T10:37:00","modified_gmt":"2009-09-18T10:37:00","slug":"three-things-a-pastor-can-never-say","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/deaconsbench\/2009\/09\/three-things-a-pastor-can-never-say.html","title":{"rendered":"Three things a pastor can never say"},"content":{"rendered":"

Well here’s a little conversation-starter for you, via New Advent<\/a>. <\/p>\n

This comes from a blog<\/a> run by Dominican Fr. Philip Neri Powell: <\/p>\n

Here they are:<\/p>\n

1). What Father says, “Please, be mindful of your children during Mass. We have a cry room.”<\/span> What parents hear: “Your kids are disruptive brats and you cannot control them. They have no place at Mass, so why do you insist on ruining our prayer with these public displays of your failed parenting? Go somewhere else!”<\/p>\n

2). What Father says, “Mass is a solemn celebration for the Church. Please keep this in mind when you are choosing your Sunday morning attire.”<\/span> What is heard: “Do not come to Church if you can’t afford decent clothes. And by ‘decent clothes’ we mean expensive clothes, preferably designer labels with good shoes. Also, nobody wants to see you poured into jeans three sizes too small, or watch you slouch around in what you think of as your ‘comfortable outfit.’ We are an exclusive club here, so dress like you belong! Or go somewhere else!”<\/p>\n

3). What Father says, “Just a reminder. . .Mass begins with the opening hymn and closes with the closing hymn. Please join us at the beginning of Mass and stay with us until the end.”<\/span> What is heard: “I’m sick and tired of you people coming in late and leaving early. What? You can’t manage to roll outta bed before noon? You can’t wait to get back to your ballgame and pot roast? Geez, people! Jesus died for your sins and all you can think about is getting out of the parking lot before traffic gets heavy. Get here on time. Stay to the end. . .or, go somewhere else!” <\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Speaking of crying…how about cell phones? I know one priest who stopped the Eucharistic Prayer, and remained silent for several long moments, until a ringing cell phone stopped. <\/p>\n

Thoughts?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Well here’s a little conversation-starter for you, via New Advent. This comes from a blog run by Dominican Fr. Philip Neri Powell: Here they are: 1). What Father says, “Please, be mindful of your children during Mass. 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