<\/p>\n
You know exactly what I mean.\u00a0 You are at an orientation, a conference, a coffee shop.\u00a0 You\u2019ve met someone who seems interesting and interested in talking.\u00a0 What\u2019s one of the first questions?\u00a0 \u201cWhat do you do for a living?\u201d\u00a0 My favorite most smarty pants response I\u2019ve ever received is, \u201cI live full time for a living.\u201d\u00a0 Cue first HINT that there might be better questions to ask someone you truly want to get to know.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
I didn\u2019t like that the first inquiry in \u201cnormal\u201d exchanges was essentially, \u201cWhat do you do to be able to pay your rent?\u201d\u00a0 Really, when you think about the question that is what you are asking. I will offer some of my favorites\u2026with this caveat.\u00a0 I often step outside the lines of expectation with a gentle warning.\u00a0 I say \u201cI know it\u2019s normal to ask what you do for a living, but I\u2019d rather ask you\u2026<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat makes you feel keenly alive?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDo you have a pursuit or hobby that really enlivens you?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDoes what you wanted to be when you were a kid have anything to do with what you do professionally now? (This one comes the closest to finding out what they actually do when they \u201cpunch the clock.\u201d)<\/p>\n
\u201cHow do you enjoy spending your leisure time?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIf you could spend all your days doing absolutely anything you wanted, with no concern about financial obligations \u2013 what would an ordinary day look like?\u201d<\/p>\n
These questions yield me greater insight into a new acquaintance.\u00a0 They also serve as a compatibility litmus.\u00a0 Any person that finds these questions utterly foreign to their experience \u2013 will likely find me utterly foreign.\u00a0 Questions like this are one of the key explanations why I stopped receiving invitations to casual cocktail parties!\u00a0 So, be warned. If you are fond of casual meaningless exchanges, do not pull these questions out of your conversational briefcase.<\/p>\n
If you were to create a set of alternative questions \u2013 what would some of yours be?\u00a0 And are you willing to give one or two of them a ride in your day and see where they might take you?\u00a0 Let me know.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
You know exactly what I mean.\u00a0 You are at an orientation, a conference, a coffee shop.\u00a0 You\u2019ve met someone who seems interesting and interested in talking.\u00a0 What\u2019s one of the first questions?\u00a0 \u201cWhat do you do for a living?\u201d\u00a0 My favorite most smarty pants response I\u2019ve ever received is, \u201cI live full time for…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":14,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[410,407,409,411,408,406],"class_list":["post-773","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-daily-joys","tag-5-meaningful-questions","tag-asking-questions","tag-building-relationships","tag-earning-a-living","tag-meaningful-questions","tag-meeting-new-people"],"yoast_head":"\n