I used to write at a local coffee establishment. \u201cThe Beanery.\u201d They were mad for coffee and the bulk of the baristas were passionate about all things coffee. There was a way to tell: their passion translated into the perfect cup of coffee. Or, it didn\u2019t. The butterscotch colored froth on top that announced a perfectly brewed cup of espresso was the first indicator of excellence. Taste followed. There were days that I consumed a beverage of less than stellar quality. And some few days I asked them to \u201ctry again.\u201d
\nYou may be familiar with one of my poems,
\n\u201ccourage doesn\u2019t always roar. sometimes courage
\nis the quiet voice at the end of the day saying,
\n\t\u2018i will try again tomorrow.\u2019\u201d
\nIt is one kind of matter to personally decide to try again. It\u2019s all about personal accountability and a dedication to giving something a fresh shot in the invigorating light of a new day.
\nIt\u2019s another matter to ask someone else to try again. Another matter entirely. There are all kinds of issues rolled into this \u2013 it\u2019s the reason why people will endure one of the worst meals they\u2019ve ever been served and vow to never again frequent that particular establishment.
\nWhether it is personal or public, the chance to \u201ctry again\u201d is an opportunity. When an eatery is consistently not getting something right and no one says anything\u2026how do they know? Absent honest feed back a restaurant learns too late the areas they need to improve. Business rolls back and they end up closing their doors.
\nOn the rare occasion when I would trundle back to the coffee counter and gently announce, \u201cI know how you feel about your coffee so I thought I\u2019d better tell you this one was not quite right.\u201d In all instances that I can remember, they were so appreciative. Asked me for more information and conducted a staff process assessment right in front of me. I watched as the discovery unfolded: a missed step, a piece of equipment not quite tightened. Fortunately for me, their objectives matched mine – we all wanted the end result to be an ideal cup of coffee. Not a pretty good cup, or a \u201cclose enough\u201d cup – but as close to perfect as we humans get to come in such things.
\nThere\u2019s a very tentative line between going with the flow and simply tolerating something. I understand the line for me and this is what it looks line. I would not ask a barista to \u201ctry again\u201d if I were served a wretched cup of coffee while traveling and having discovered a coffee bar out in the middle of between here and there. Nor would I send food back to the kitchen in such an establishment. I do not know them. I\u2019m not vested in their process or success and I know that, like me, travelers don\u2019t come specifically to a place like this, they stop here on their way to somewhere else. In that context, \u201cgood enough\u201d is indeed good enough. In instances like these I go with the flow. Accept what comes and call it good. Enough.
\nTolerance. Or in this line drawing, intolerance. I speak up when the consequences matter to me. When I know the owners and want them to have continued success. I share my experience when I know the objective and goals of the establishment.
\nThe request to \u201ctry again\u201d works for me when core values are shared. When there is a mutual view. In this context the request in an invitation to greater performance.
\nWhen core values are not shared the request becomes a judgment and often the beginning of a disagreeable exchange. Even disintegrating into an argument. Often this type of exchange ends with, \u201cI was only trying to help,\u201d and hurt feelings on both sides of a counter.
\nSo this morning as I am again enjoying the environment of a coffee house committed to excellence I remember this lesson. In reflecting I realize this is an effective measure for many different relationships. In a friendship, when the foundational intentions are shared \u2013 such exchanges become opportunities for shared growth. In associations where the core intentions are dramatically different \u2013 such a request becomes fodder for a fight.
\nI sip my delicious cup of java, put down my fork next to a delectable gluten-free scone which I\u2019ve nearly finished and am grateful that I have opportunities in my day, in many venues, to \u201ctry again.\u201d <\/p>\n
*****<\/p>\n
– mary anne radmacher\u2019s poem, \u201ccourage doesn\u2019t always roar\u201d is included in the Oxford Dictionary of American quotations and finds uses around the globe. It is the title of two books and is quoted in dozens of other publications. Visit her facebook space \u2013 facebook.com\/couragedoesn\u2019talwaysroar.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I used to write at a local coffee establishment. \u201cThe Beanery.\u201d They were mad for coffee and the bulk of the baristas were passionate about all things coffee. There was a way to tell: their passion translated into the perfect cup of coffee. Or, it didn\u2019t. The butterscotch colored froth on top that announced a…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":14,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[370,371,10],"class_list":["post-715","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-daily-joys","tag-courage-doesnt-always-roar","tag-facebook-comcouragedoesntalwaysroar","tag-mary-anne-radmacher"],"yoast_head":"\n