{"id":579,"date":"2011-05-08T11:00:19","date_gmt":"2011-05-08T15:00:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/blissblog\/?p=579"},"modified":"2011-05-08T23:08:58","modified_gmt":"2011-05-09T03:08:58","slug":"resilience","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/blissblog\/2011\/05\/resilience.html","title":{"rendered":"Resilience"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

A few days ago, a co-worker was talking about her Ph.D dissertation which is on the subject of resilience. I offered to let her pick my brain (what’s left of it these days), since it is at the core of what I teach my clients, many of whom have faced major traumas throughout their lives. Her questions were along the lines of: “What makes one person able to overcome such challenges, while others\u00a0 succumb?\u00a0”\u00a0 and “Can this be taught?”\u00a0 I had responses to both.\u00a0 The answer to the second was an emphatic YES!\u00a0 The answer to the first is a bit more involved.<\/p>\n

Many cultures revere strength…gotta be strong…gotta stand firm, when in reality, flexibility and resilience\u00a0are equally valuable. Nature provides us with poignant examples. When in the ocean, bending to the waves is less likely to get you knocked on your butt, than standing solid against the water. A willow tree that bends is more likely to withstand the storm than an oak tree that stands firm. I had a first hand experience of that a few years ago. While leaving the grounds of the hospital where I work, to go to lunch, in the\u00a0midst of a\u00a0September storm, the wind was whipping furiously. I parked the car by the admissions building to drop off paperwork. Before me was the lovely tree lined driveway where 50-60 foot tall oaks stood sentry. I had this fleeting thought: “Wouldn’t it\u00a0be something if one of these trees came down?”….BLAM!\u00a0 No sooner had that image crossed my mind, then\u00a0one did just that right before my ever widening eyes. I had a few simultaneous thoughts “Thank God no one was coming\u00a0down the driveway at that moment.”,\u00a0 and “Holy smokes, what did you do?”\u00a0 I knew on some level that I didn’t cause the tree to crash earthward, but realizing how tapped in we are all, I did take credit for being aware of the possibilities, at least on an unconscious level. While that tree uprooted itself,\u00a0more flexible\u00a0companions remained erect.<\/p>\n

I also told her about Roger Crawford who wrote the book “How High Can You Bounce?” which came into my life several\u00a0years ago and it is my go-to source for teaching resilience skills.\u00a0Born with congenital ‘challenges’ such as\u00a0missing fingers and\u00a0I believe, his leg from the knee down, Roger became a champion athlete and for the past 25 years\u00a0has spoken world wide to audiences mesmerized by his\u00a0passion for life. I love his quote: “Challenges are inevitable, defeat is optional.”\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

I\u00a0have come to understand that the statement:\u00a0 “Most people do the best they can, given their circumstances.”, is incomplete.\u00a0Rather, I\u00a0see that “Most people\u00a0do the best they are WILLING to do, given their current mindset\/attitude\/world view.”\u00a0 Each day, I see\u00a0folks\u00a0surpass their former beliefs of what is so and what is possible. Heck, I surprise myself\u00a0by doing that too.\u00a0No way, 15 years ago, would I have imagined that I would be doing all that I am\u00a0at this point in my\u00a0life, because back then,\u00a0I was just coasting along, letting life have its way with me, rather than KNOWING that I had the right, responsibility and ability to create my life experience, molding and shaping them from the raw materials I am\u00a0given each day.<\/p>\n

www.rogercrawford.com<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 A few days ago, a co-worker was talking about her Ph.D dissertation which is on the subject of resilience. I offered to let her pick my brain (what’s left of it these days), since it is at the core of what I teach my clients, many of whom have faced major traumas throughout their…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":233,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1,11,19,4,51,38,6,18],"tags":[249,247,248],"class_list":["post-579","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-attracting-what-you-desire","category-bliss-bites","category-empowerment","category-inspiration","category-mental-health","category-transformation","category-visualization","category-wellness","tag-how-high-can-you-bounce","tag-resilience","tag-roger-crawford"],"yoast_head":"\nResilience - The Bliss Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/blissblog\/2011\/05\/resilience.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Resilience - The Bliss Blog\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 A few days ago, a co-worker was talking about her Ph.D dissertation which is on the subject of resilience. 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She has also contributed to several anthologies and personal growth books. Edie has interviewed such notables as Ram Dass, Wayne Dyer, Debbie Ford, don Miguel Ruiz, don Miguel Ruiz, Jr. Marianne Williamson, Grover Washington, Jr. Noah Levine, Shirley MacLaine, Dennis Weaver, Ben and Jerry and His Holiness the Dalai Lama. She calls herself an Opti-mystic who sees the world through the eyes of possibility. 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