{"id":1642,"date":"2009-03-10T13:02:37","date_gmt":"2009-03-10T13:02:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/beyondblue\/2009\/03\/on-breaking-up-with-girlfriend.html"},"modified":"2009-03-10T13:02:37","modified_gmt":"2009-03-10T13:02:37","slug":"on-breaking-up-with-girlfriend","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beyondblue\/2009\/03\/on-breaking-up-with-girlfriend.html","title":{"rendered":"On Breaking Up with Girlfriends"},"content":{"rendered":"

I very much like this comment on the combox of my friendship video<\/a>:<\/p>\n

This video post on friendship really hit home. I’ve had a lot of shame about having girlfriendships blow up. Now I can see that they were unequal, unhealthy, toxic, and needed to end, just as many dating relationships ran their course in my single years.<\/p>\n

I now have a motto, reverse paraphrasing Gloria Steinem: I no longer accept behavior from a woman that I wouldn’t tolerate in a man.<\/p>\n

The bottom line is, in any relationship — is there mutual respect? Attention to boundaries? If a person is relentlessly negative and leaves you deflated after every contact — that’s not a friend.<\/p>\n

I do think women, in particular, can be guilty of using their friends as complaint-receptacles — they often assume intimacy without realizing it has to be earned, just as in a dating relationship.<\/p>\n

I no longer feel bad about letting rotten relationships go.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

To read more Beyond Blue, go to http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/beyond_blue<\/a>, and to get to Group Beyond Blue, a support group at Beliefnet Community, click here.<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

To subscribe to “Beyond Blue” click here.<\/a><\/p>\n

\"rss.gif\"<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I very much like this comment on the combox of my friendship video: This video post on friendship really hit home. I’ve had a lot of shame about having girlfriendships blow up. Now I can see that they were unequal, unhealthy, toxic, and needed to end, just as many dating relationships ran their course in…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":17,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1642","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-friendships"],"yoast_head":"\nOn Breaking Up with Girlfriends - Beyond Blue<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beyondblue\/2009\/03\/on-breaking-up-with-girlfriend.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"On Breaking Up with Girlfriends - Beyond Blue\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I very much like this comment on the combox of my friendship video: This video post on friendship really hit home. 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