{"id":1530,"date":"2009-01-13T06:33:50","date_gmt":"2009-01-13T06:33:50","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/beyondblue\/2009\/01\/ovidia-an-obsessive-need-to-be.html"},"modified":"2009-01-13T06:33:50","modified_gmt":"2009-01-13T06:33:50","slug":"ovidia-an-obsessive-need-to-be","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beyondblue\/2009\/01\/ovidia-an-obsessive-need-to-be.html","title":{"rendered":"Ovidia: An Obsessive Need to be Loved–The Crux of the Matter"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"broken<\/span><\/p>\n

Blogger friend Ovidia who writes “The Busy Time”<\/a> just posted the following piece on her blog about the obsession to be loved by a certain someone.<\/a> I wanted to post it, at least in part, because I’ve received such an overwhelming response to the support group that I just started last night for persons involved in or grieving an emotional affair.<\/a> Last week, when I posted my “12 ways to mend a broken heart,”<\/a> my in-box was full as well. Perhaps some of my BB readers will find consolation in Ovidia’s honest post. For the full text, click here.<\/a><\/p>\n

The crux of the matter is this:<\/p>\n

\nI cannot seem to get over this obsessive need to be loved by someone. A man\/partner\/friend-and-lover someone.<\/p>\n

\nThe longer I am alone and lonely, the more I desire this relationship and the sicker I get.<\/p>\n

\nThe more I want it and the sicker I get, the more off-putting I become and the less likely I am to find it.<\/p>\n

\nEven when I am white-knuckling through the days, trying to control my thoughts and impersonate a normal person, there is stuff going on inside my heart that I cannot seem to control.<\/p>\n

\nI “didn’t meet” someone at a work function last month, but was intrigued. Became Facebook friends, discovered he was single and his dogs were his life, and sent him a raft of helpful (?) messages when they got out and were lost, briefly.<\/p>\n

\nWandered over to his building and introduced myself last week; had a 20 minute, very enjoyable conversation about four-leggeds, and he accepted an invitation to tour the new animal shelter Saturday.<\/p>\n

\nFor the rest of the week, I did everything in my power to reign in my wayward thoughts, to view them with amusement and let them go when appropriate, and to concentrate on the fact that if I was going to have someone come over, I was going to have to clean the living room and the kitchen and that was A Good Thing, no matter WHAT the circumstances. Confessed all to my therapist Thursday and got some helpful advice as well as encouragement that I was on the right track.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

To continue reading Ovidia’s post, click here.<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Blogger friend Ovidia who writes “The Busy Time” just posted the following piece on her blog about the obsession to be loved by a certain someone. I wanted to post it, at least in part, because I’ve received such an overwhelming response to the support group that I just started last night for persons involved…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":17,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1530","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-relationships"],"yoast_head":"\nOvidia: An Obsessive Need to be Loved-The Crux of the Matter - Beyond Blue<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beyondblue\/2009\/01\/ovidia-an-obsessive-need-to-be.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Ovidia: An Obsessive Need to be Loved-The Crux of the Matter - Beyond Blue\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Blogger friend Ovidia who writes “The Busy Time” just posted the following piece on her blog about the obsession to be loved by a certain someone. 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