{"id":9680,"date":"2014-12-21T19:31:51","date_gmt":"2014-12-22T00:31:51","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/?p=9680"},"modified":"2014-12-21T19:31:51","modified_gmt":"2014-12-22T00:31:51","slug":"taking-joy-in-others-joy-or-how-did-you-escape-acrophobia","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/2014\/12\/taking-joy-in-others-joy-or-how-did-you-escape-acrophobia.html","title":{"rendered":"taking joy in others&#8217; joy (or, how did you escape acrophobia??)"},"content":{"rendered":"<figure id=\"attachment_9681\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-9681\" style=\"width: 300px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/files\/2014\/12\/phone-home.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-9681\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/239\/2014\/12\/phone-home-300x207.jpg\" alt=\"brandtk via deviantart\" width=\"300\" height=\"207\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-9681\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">brandtk via deviantart<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Our\u00a0younger son phoned home! Since he&#8217;s halfway around the world (literally &#8212; 14 hours ahead of us here), this reassures his mother, who &#8212; as he notes) worries&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Please understand that\u00a0<em>I\u00a0<\/em>understand how pointless it is to worry about an intelligent,\u00a0<em>grown<\/em> <em>man<\/em>. I&#8217;ve written <a href=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/2014\/12\/wrestling-with-parenthood-the-clenched-fist-of-upadana.html\" target=\"_blank\">before<\/a> about learning to let go of the worries that mothers (and fathers, too) have for their adult offspring. But when your son shares exuberant recounts of canyoning some remote Philippine island, w\/out benefit of helmet, rope, or even his SHOES&#8230;? How can you keep from worrying?? Who even knew what &#8216;canyoning&#8217;\u00a0<em>was<\/em>?<\/p>\n<p>Note: he also shared that\u00a0he&#8217;s fine, although his legs got quite the workout. The only casualty\u00a0of his adventure was a shoe. Resulting in the shoe&#8217;s mate being cast into the abyss as well. Or perhaps thrown off one of the 14 metre cliffs he jumped into the ocean from&#8230;!<\/p>\n<p>Motherhood is NOT for the faint-hearted. I was much calmer listening to his other recent adventure, snorkeling\u00a0w\/ 6 &amp; 7 metre whale sharks, off the shoreline. F2F, as it were &#8212;\u00a0<em>just a couple of inches from my face!\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Actually, once I caught my breath, I&#8217;m ecstatic for him. These are the memories he hoped to build when he left Portland for points east. Far east, as it turns out. So the trip is doing just what he wanted: letting him try new things. And it&#8217;s doing things even\u00a0parents approve of: he has to budget his limited income to do these things, for instance. The reason for no helmet or rope was that he &amp; new friends went w\/ locals instead of a tour group. Hence the sore (and I would bet pretty scraped up!) legs: doing the canyon w\/ a tour group (and equipment) would have cost him at least twice as much<\/p>\n<p>This is what I work to focus on: the joy &amp; self-sufficiency attendant upon young men throwing themselves into watery abysses&#8230;.<\/p>\n<p>No,\u00a0it&#8217;s not MY\u00a0idea of a good time. But you know what? It&#8217;s his. And when you love someone dearly, you&#8217;re happy when they&#8217;re happy. You rejoice in their bliss, even if it sends chills up your spine (I&#8217;m more than a little acrophobic; heights TERRIFY me!). Of course, it helps if they phone home and tell you all about it. Pictures would be nice, too. \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Our\u00a0younger son phoned home! Since he&#8217;s halfway around the world (literally &#8212; 14 hours ahead of us here), this reassures his mother, who &#8212; as he notes) worries&#8230; Please understand that\u00a0I\u00a0understand how pointless it is to worry about an intelligent,\u00a0grown man. I&#8217;ve written before about learning to let go of the worries that mothers (and&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":398,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[37,538,437],"tags":[11,1181,1187,262,1301,1286],"class_list":["post-9680","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-family","category-mothering","category-sons","tag-beginners-heart","tag-britton-gildersleeve","tag-buddhism","tag-buddhist-blogs","tag-mothering","tag-sons"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>taking joy in others&#039; joy (or, how did you escape acrophobia??) - Beginner&#039;s Heart<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Our\u00a0younger son phoned home! 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Since he's halfway around the world (literally -- 14 hours ahead of us here), this reassures his mother, who -- as he notes)","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/2014\/12\/taking-joy-in-others-joy-or-how-did-you-escape-acrophobia.html","og_site_name":"Beginner&#039;s Heart","article_published_time":"2014-12-22T00:31:51+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/files\/2014\/12\/phone-home-300x207.jpg"}],"author":"Britton Gildersleeve","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/2014\/12\/taking-joy-in-others-joy-or-how-did-you-escape-acrophobia.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/2014\/12\/taking-joy-in-others-joy-or-how-did-you-escape-acrophobia.html","name":"taking joy in others' joy (or, how did you escape acrophobia??) - Beginner&#039;s Heart","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/2014\/12\/taking-joy-in-others-joy-or-how-did-you-escape-acrophobia.html#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/2014\/12\/taking-joy-in-others-joy-or-how-did-you-escape-acrophobia.html#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/files\/2014\/12\/phone-home-300x207.jpg","datePublished":"2014-12-22T00:31:51+00:00","dateModified":"2014-12-22T00:31:51+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/#\/schema\/person\/b4348bfbe2223c0ec325db830aa95f52"},"description":"Our\u00a0younger son phoned home! 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