{"id":7506,"date":"2013-12-03T16:43:07","date_gmt":"2013-12-03T21:43:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/?p=7506"},"modified":"2013-12-05T14:47:50","modified_gmt":"2013-12-05T19:47:50","slug":"just-who-are-you-calling-average","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/2013\/12\/just-who-are-you-calling-average.html","title":{"rendered":"just who are you calling average&#8230;?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/239\/2013\/12\/average1.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft  wp-image-7511\" alt=\"average\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/239\/2013\/12\/average1.jpg\" width=\"188\" height=\"131\" \/><\/a>A friend &amp; former colleague recently posted a <a href=\"http:\/\/hokament.teamhokama.com\/just-pick-up-the-phone\/\" target=\"_blank\">blog entry<\/a> where he wrestled with his (mild) obsession w\/ being &#8216;the best.&#8217; He&#8217;s very good at anything he turns his hand to: technology, teaching, parenting, music, running. And those are just the few things I&#8217;ve seen him do!<\/p>\n<p>But that&#8217;s not what he thinks. If he&#8217;s not the best, he confesses &#8212; and the focus of the blog post was his drop in running time following an injury &#8212; he&#8217;s not happy.<\/p>\n<p>So here&#8217;s my question: do you know ANYONE who&#8217;s really &#8216;average&#8217;&#8230;? Who is totally ordinary? Right smack dab in the middle of the bell curve on EVERYTHING? I don&#8217;t.<\/p>\n<p>I don&#8217;t think any one really IS &#8216;average.&#8217; Each of us is unique. I suppose we know that, intellectually. But when we fit whatever stat is trending, it can be hard to remember.<\/p>\n<p>My friend Luke is nowhere near &#8216;average.&#8217; He&#8217;s amazing, if he could just see himself from an objective &#8216;outside&#8217; perspective. A parent who adores his kids, a co-worker who is generous with time &amp; ideas, a writer of no small talent. And funny as hell, to boot. How average is THAT?<\/p>\n<p>And what the heck is WRONG with being &#8216;average&#8217; anyway? What does that word even MEAN? It seems to be another word for &#8216;ordinary.&#8217; But even ordinary &#8212; I&#8217;m thinking ordinary magic, or ordinary mind &#8212; is beautiful. So, does &#8216;average&#8217; now mean &#8216;not special&#8217;&#8230;? When did that happen? I reject that meaning!<a href=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/239\/2013\/12\/ordinary-mind2.png\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-full wp-image-7515\" alt=\"ordinary mind2\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/239\/2013\/12\/ordinary-mind2.png\" width=\"197\" height=\"79\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Days when the ordinary leaps out &amp; surprises me are my favourites: when I look up at the grey winter sky and the clouds are swirling furiously, or when a fox steps free from the woods by the house, or my grand-nephew says something absolutely hilarious&#8230; These aren&#8217;t epiphanies. They&#8217;re just ordinary days, when something quite common, really, is framed by my attention. Something not defined as &#8216;special&#8217; becomes so, because I&#8217;m deep within that moment. Not judging &#8212; just enjoying.<\/p>\n<p>Here&#8217;s my wish for each of us (myself included): that we might just a few times this year &#8212; heck, I&#8217;d be happy if it was simply annual! &#8212; see ourselves as our friends do. See our idiosyncratic, uniquely loveable gifts through the eyes of someone who isn&#8217;t judging us, but enjoying us. Instead of filtered through the always-critical lens of self-&#8216;improvement.&#8217; (Which might just as well be called &#8216;never satisfied.&#8217;)<\/p>\n<p>Because I know if Luke could see himself as I do, HE would know he&#8217;s not simply &#8216;average.&#8217; He&#8217;s the best kind of special. One irreplaceable human being, living his life to the best of his ability.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A friend &amp; former colleague recently posted a blog entry where he wrestled with his (mild) obsession w\/ being &#8216;the best.&#8217; He&#8217;s very good at anything he turns his hand to: technology, teaching, parenting, music, running. And those are just the few things I&#8217;ve seen him do! But that&#8217;s not what he thinks. If he&#8217;s&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":398,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[314],"tags":[692,11,1181,1187,262,1262],"class_list":["post-7506","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-friendship","tag-average","tag-beginners-heart","tag-britton-gildersleeve","tag-buddhism","tag-buddhist-blogs","tag-friendship"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>just who are you calling average...? - Beginner&#039;s Heart<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"A friend &amp; former colleague recently posted a blog entry where he wrestled with his (mild) obsession w\/ being &#039;the best.&#039; He&#039;s very good at anything\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/2013\/12\/just-who-are-you-calling-average.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"just who are you calling average...? - Beginner&#039;s Heart\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"A friend &amp; former colleague recently posted a blog entry where he wrestled with his (mild) obsession w\/ being &#039;the best.&#039; He&#039;s very good at anything\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/2013\/12\/just-who-are-you-calling-average.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Beginner&#039;s Heart\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2013-12-03T21:43:07+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2013-12-05T19:47:50+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/files\/2013\/12\/average1.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Britton Gildersleeve\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"just who are you calling average...? - Beginner&#039;s Heart","description":"A friend &amp; former colleague recently posted a blog entry where he wrestled with his (mild) obsession w\/ being 'the best.' 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