{"id":1,"date":"2011-04-20T03:29:22","date_gmt":"2011-04-20T03:29:22","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/beginnersheart\/?p=1"},"modified":"2011-05-03T17:35:12","modified_gmt":"2011-05-03T21:35:12","slug":"hello-world","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/beginnersheart\/2011\/04\/hello-world.html","title":{"rendered":"Beginnings ~"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>I\u2019m not good at gentle. Once, when my older son was still in elementary school, I apologised to him. I\u2019m sorry you don\u2019t have a mother more like Dirk\u2019s<\/em>, I told him. You deserve a more nurturing mother \u2013 someone who is kinder & gentler. <\/em><\/p>\n

<\/em><\/p>\n

That\u2019s all right, Mom<\/em>, he reassured me. You\u2019ll go to the principal for us<\/em>. And I would. And did, more than once.<\/p>\n

For all its soft reputation, kindness is hard. Desmond Tutu and the Dalai Lama \"\"<\/a>make it look so simple. Somehow you \u2018be\u2019 compassionate. On them, it looks like a soft grey pullover \u2013 warm, kind of comforting. I\u2019m afraid I\u2019m pricklier than that\u2026<\/p>\n

But I\u2019d still like<\/em> to be a soft grey sweater and not a prickly Shetland pullover. For me \u2013 Chinese Year of the Dragon: hot-headed and impulsive, stubborn and given to pride \u2013 love is hot and red. Fierce. Sung out loud and clear. Fire, not fog.<\/p>\n

I\u2019d like to be gentler. I\u2019d like to be more nurturing, less antagonistic. Meet intolerance and injustice w\/ kindness and compassion. Like Dirk\u2019s mother, long ago, I\u2019d like to be the woman who soothed broken hearts w\/ cool hands, and knew just the right thing to say. But it\u2019s harder than childbirth\u2026<\/p>\n

So I\u2019m studying Beginner\u2019s Heart. The great Zen Buddhist Shunryu Suzuki made \u2018beginner\u2019s mind\u2019 famous in the West. It is, as Richard Baker notes, having \u2018few preconceptions\u2019 about Zen Buddhism, \u2018being open to it,\u2019 and \u2018believing it can help\u2019 our lives. Wikipedia (the source of quick windows into everything!) says it’s “having an attitude of openness, eagerness, and lack of preconceptions when studying a subject, even when studying at an advanced level, just as a beginner in that subject would.”<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>If you substitute \u2018love\u2019 for Zen, that\u2019s my idea of Beginner\u2019s Heart.<\/p>\n

I have no idea how to learn love. In that respect, I\u2019m like the students who came to Suzuki and asked just to practice w\/ him, so they could see Zen in action. Sometimes I study the great lovers of history: Jesus, the Buddha, St. Francis and Kuanyin and the poet Rumi. There are many more, who seemed able to love like rivers ~ freely, smoothly, w\/ unbroken constancy. I love more like a flood, or a tidal wave. But most like a fire that sweeps ahead of itself. (See how even metaphors desert me? \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n

I\u2019m open to hearing how the rest of you manage compassion, kindness, gentleness and love. That\u2019s what I hope to explore ~ how to cultivate Beginner\u2019s Heart. How to learn to love ~<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I\u2019m not good at gentle. Once, when my older son was still in elementary school, I apologised to him. I\u2019m sorry you don\u2019t have a mother more like Dirk\u2019s, I told him. You deserve a more nurturing mother \u2013 someone who is kinder & gentler. That\u2019s all right, Mom, he reassured me. You\u2019ll go to…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":270,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,3,4],"tags":[11,1177,1183,10,9],"class_list":["post-1","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-britton-gildersleeve","category-buddhist","category-unitarian","tag-beginners-heart","tag-buddhist","tag-dalai-lama","tag-desmond-tutu","tag-shunryu-suzuki"],"yoast_head":"\nBeginnings ~ - Beginner's Heart<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"I\u2019m not good at gentle. 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