{"id":1209,"date":"2008-08-28T19:33:45","date_gmt":"2008-08-28T19:33:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/astrologicalmusings\/2008\/08\/negotiating-painful-family-sit.html"},"modified":"2008-08-28T19:33:45","modified_gmt":"2008-08-28T19:33:45","slug":"negotiating-painful-family-sit","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/2008\/08\/negotiating-painful-family-sit.html","title":{"rendered":"Negotiating painful family situations"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"mt-image-left\" height=\"403\" alt=\"at-home.jpg\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/69\/import\/images\/at-home.jpg\" width=\"300\" \/><\/p>\n<p><font><em>Art by <\/em><\/font><a href=\"http:\/\/www.listenforjoy.com\/art\/athome.html\"><font><em>Melanie Weidner<\/em><\/font><\/a><\/p>\n<p>It is a commonly held belief among explorers of the New Consciousness that as souls, we work with our guides to choose the life that we will next be born into.&nbsp; For many people that&#8217;s a horrifying thought!&nbsp; Why would I choose the kind of torment I experienced as a kid?<\/p>\n<\/p>\n<p>But the birthchart often reflects with eerie accuracy the psychological setting of the family of origin.&nbsp; Pluto conjunct the Moon &#8211; your mother seemed terrifying to you?&nbsp; Saturn square the Sun&nbsp;&#8211; you never felt you were good enough for your father?&nbsp; Yet you were born with this astrological chart; the birthchart&nbsp;predates the events that cause us emotional pain.&nbsp; This makes it hard to continue blaming our parents since it appears that we come into this world already prewired for certain experiences.&nbsp;&nbsp; Later in life we learn to make conscious choices that lift us out of a state where we simply react to external stimuli that keep us stuck in the psychodrama of our lives.<\/p>\n<p>I am always impressed by the tenacity and strength of my clients, many of whom have come through difficult childhoods with tremendous coping skills and an eagerness to transcend their limitations.&nbsp; The nugget of transformation lies within every painful situation, and is a great gift.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m not so sure it&#8217;s necessary to forgive the ones that hurt us, but I DO believe it&#8217;s imperative that we end the cycle of blame.&nbsp; As long as we blame anyone, whether it&#8217;s ourselves or someone else, we keep ourselves locked in a box of victimhood from which we can&#8217;t escape.&nbsp; When we make a choice to turn away from blame and self-pity, we&nbsp;naturally open to the gift of power and transformation that awaits. &nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Art by Melanie Weidner It is a commonly held belief among explorers of the New Consciousness that as souls, we work with our guides to choose the life that we will next be born into.&nbsp; For many people that&#8217;s a horrifying thought!&nbsp; Why would I choose the kind of torment I experienced as a kid?&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":328,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[54],"tags":[59,58],"class_list":["post-1209","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personal-evolution","tag-forgiveness","tag-healing-family-dynamics-astrology"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Negotiating painful family situations - Astrological Musings<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/2008\/08\/negotiating-painful-family-sit.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Negotiating painful family situations - Astrological Musings\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Art by Melanie Weidner It is a commonly held belief among explorers of the New Consciousness that as souls, we work with our guides to choose the life that we will next be born into.&nbsp; For many people that&#8217;s a horrifying thought!&nbsp; Why would I choose the kind of torment I experienced as a kid?&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/2008\/08\/negotiating-painful-family-sit.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Astrological Musings\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2008-08-28T19:33:45+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/astrologicalmusings\/files\/import\/images\/at-home.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Lynn Hayes\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Negotiating painful family situations - Astrological Musings","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/2008\/08\/negotiating-painful-family-sit.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Negotiating painful family situations - Astrological Musings","og_description":"Art by Melanie Weidner It is a commonly held belief among explorers of the New Consciousness that as souls, we work with our guides to choose the life that we will next be born into.&nbsp; For many people that&#8217;s a horrifying thought!&nbsp; Why would I choose the kind of torment I experienced as a kid?&hellip;","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/2008\/08\/negotiating-painful-family-sit.html","og_site_name":"Astrological Musings","article_published_time":"2008-08-28T19:33:45+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/astrologicalmusings\/files\/import\/images\/at-home.jpg"}],"author":"Lynn Hayes","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/2008\/08\/negotiating-painful-family-sit.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/2008\/08\/negotiating-painful-family-sit.html","name":"Negotiating painful family situations - Astrological Musings","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/2008\/08\/negotiating-painful-family-sit.html#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/2008\/08\/negotiating-painful-family-sit.html#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/astrologicalmusings\/files\/import\/images\/at-home.jpg","datePublished":"2008-08-28T19:33:45+00:00","dateModified":"2008-08-28T19:33:45+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/#\/schema\/person\/0267afd41b8c0ee7204a5063b003a35f"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/2008\/08\/negotiating-painful-family-sit.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/2008\/08\/negotiating-painful-family-sit.html"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/2008\/08\/negotiating-painful-family-sit.html#primaryimage","url":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/astrologicalmusings\/files\/import\/images\/at-home.jpg","contentUrl":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/astrologicalmusings\/files\/import\/images\/at-home.jpg"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/2008\/08\/negotiating-painful-family-sit.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Negotiating painful family situations"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/","name":"Astrological Musings","description":"Beliefnet Voices - Lynn Hayes","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/#\/schema\/person\/0267afd41b8c0ee7204a5063b003a35f","name":"Lynn Hayes","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/d66\/d66c632862817d88a0ce2af3a36c4050x96.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/astrologicalmusings\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/d66\/d66c632862817d88a0ce2af3a36c4050x96.jpg","caption":"Lynn Hayes"},"description":"Lynn Hayes has been a practising astrological consultant in beautiful North Carolina for over 25 years, working with clients all over the world both in person and by phone. 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