{"id":1577,"date":"2016-10-06T01:53:34","date_gmt":"2016-10-06T01:53:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/?p=1577"},"modified":"2016-10-06T02:47:42","modified_gmt":"2016-10-06T02:47:42","slug":"dear-america-black-guy-ii","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/2016\/10\/dear-america-black-guy-ii.html","title":{"rendered":"Dear America, from a Black guy II"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>America, my heart is broken.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/hurt2healingmag.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/04\/sad-man.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-1578\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/304\/2016\/10\/sad-man-300x201.jpg\" alt=\"sad-man\" width=\"300\" height=\"201\" \/><\/a>A couple of months ago, I wrote this letter about <a href=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/2016\/07\/dear-america-black-guy.html\">how awful it feels to be a Black guy who truly loves this country<\/a>.\u00a0 And you, America, have responded by making things much, much, worse.<\/p>\n<p>This article has taken longer than any other to write, because I keep having to start over with each fresh new tragedy.\u00a0 I started over with the murder of Terence Crutcher.\u00a0 I started over with the murder of Keith Scott. I even recorded <a href=\"https:\/\/dl.dropboxusercontent.com\/u\/14981816\/bdavewalters.2016-09-13.210004.mp3\" target=\"_blank\">an episode of Rise UP with B. Dave Walters<\/a> where I talked about how it feels. \u00a0But this latest insult is the last straw.<\/p>\n<p><strong><a href=\"http:\/\/www.latimes.com\/science\/sciencenow\/la-sci-sn-black-boys-preschool-20160928-snap-story.html\" target=\"_blank\">Eye-tracking technology shows that preschool teachers have implicit bias against Black boys.\u00a0<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s a mortal sin in the online world to direct people to another web page, but go read that article because it\u2019s important and I don\u2019t want to misrepresent the findings. I\u2019ll wait.<\/p>\n<p>Here\u2019s the question I want to ask, and I want you to keep in the back of your mind from now on:<br \/>\n<strong>Where would you be in life if you\u2019d been treated like you were wild and dangerous since you were three years old? <em>Literally<\/em> longer than you can remember?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>The findings of this study kept me up all night. Here it was in black and white (pun intended) that little Black boys were being profiled from the day they first set foot in the classroom.\u00a0 The study found not only that \u201cAfrican American students are suspended or expelled at more than twice the rate of children of any other ethnicity,\u201d but that \u201cin state-funded pre-K classrooms, 3- and 4-year-olds were being kicked out of school <strong>three times as often<\/strong> as older students. And Black children \u2014 boys mostly \u2014 were about twice as likely as Latino and white children to be expelled.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>So think about that. These kids\u2019 earliest recollections are of objectively provably overly harsh treatment. If you\u2019ve been around a three year old lately, you might notice that they occasionally have problems sitting still and following directions. But little Keith, little Terence, little Philando, little Alton, little DAVE get flagged early as being disruptive influences.<\/p>\n<p>So besides the fact we already know that <a href=\"http:\/\/www.npr.org\/sections\/health-shots\/2012\/09\/18\/161159263\/teachers-expectations-can-influence-how-students-perform\" target=\"_blank\">a teacher\u2019s expectations DIRECTLY influence student performance<\/a>, what happens when you\u2019re expected to be a problem in advance?\u00a0 At what point do these children begin conforming to expectations, and actually become the disruptive elements that are still going to be overreacted to? \u00a0At what point exactly did they have a chance to cultivate a love of learning? When were they able to invest their energies into cultivating their own unique genius?<\/p>\n<p>And at what point did they learn that school was a hellish ordeal where they were perpetually treated as <em>other<\/em>?\u00a0 Spoiler alert: Around three years old.<\/p>\n<p>Another interesting take away from that article is that Black faculty was actually <em>more<\/em> likely to be too hard on Black children. Allow me to explain to you why that is, which is something 114% of Black people will verify. Here is exactly what\u2019s going through that teacher\u2019s head:<\/p>\n<p>\u201c<em>This little Black boy is not going to show out and embarrass all of us.<\/em>\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left\">An interesting reality of being Black in America is we are all connected. If you notice, 9 out of 10 times we always greet each other on the street, if only with eye contact and a nod. All that Brother and Sister stuff is actually true, there\u2019s an innate kinship and connection between all of us.<\/p>\n<p>Don\u2019t believe me? Here\u2019s just one example of an experience 99.9% of us shared in January 2008:<br \/>\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Anthony Anderson Monologue On Hope &amp; Obama on Blackish (HD)\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/rA9QBZr8WEg?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>However, that connection often gets weaponized and used against us (more on this later). And a sad byproduct of this is when one of us messes up, it\u2019s a problem for all of us. When a Black person gets out of line near us, we all cover our faces. The less of us there are in the vicinity, the more acute it becomes.<\/p>\n<p>Along with that, we have ALL heard that we \u201chave to be twice as good to get half as much.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0 So a Black teacher is going to make extra certain their handful of Black students are the absolute model children, <em>even if that pressure is horrifically unfair to the child<\/em>.\u00a0 It\u2019s almost as if in attempting to prepare them for the unfair double standard they\u2019ll experience in the world, we begin by inflicting it on them as toddlers.<\/p>\n<p>Bonus point: We often hear about the fiction of the epidemic of Black children growing up without fathers, but <a href=\"http:\/\/datacenter.kidscount.org\/data\/tables\/107-children-in-single-parent-families-by#detailed\/1\/any\/false\/869,36,868,867,133\/10,11,9,12,1,185,13\/432,431\" target=\"_blank\">more White and Latino families are raised by single parents than Black<\/a>; that is a media fiction and right wing talking<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_1579\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-1579\" style=\"width: 300px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/photo.php?fbid=1370914439604041&amp;id=100000564957891&amp;set=a.101747843187380.3861.100000564957891&amp;source=56\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-1579\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/304\/2016\/10\/CEVmrB_UsAAb-Rv-300x300.jpg\" alt=\"Click and read the description. \" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-1579\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Click and read the description.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>point.<\/p>\n<p><strong>The Problem with Policing.<\/strong><br \/>\nSo these little Black boys and girls are getting an objectively provably unfair chance from the start.\u00a0 Then they go out<\/p>\n<p>into the world, where Blacks and other people of color are 3x more likely to be stopped by the police than Whites, with Blacks again 2x as likely to be arrested and 4x as likely to be threatened with arrest than their White counterparts. \u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.aclu.org\/news\/department-justice-statistics-show-clear-pattern-racial-profiling?redirect=racial-justice%2Fdepartment-justice-statistics-show-clear-pattern-racial-profiling\" target=\"_blank\">Source<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>Young <a href=\"https:\/\/www.propublica.org\/article\/deadly-force-in-black-and-white\" target=\"_blank\">Black males are 21x more likely to be shot and killed by the police<\/a> than their white peers.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left\">It\u2019s gotten so bad that some schools have begun teaching classes on how Black kids should interact with police to avoid getting murdered.\u00a0 This was highlighted in a recent report by John Oliver about police accountability that absolutely everyone needs to see:<br \/>\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Police Accountability: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO)\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/zaD84DTGULo?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>If you <a href=\"http:\/\/www.facebook.com\/bdavewalters2\" target=\"_blank\">follow me on Facebook<\/a> (and you should) I\u2019ve been on a tear about this. And it never fails that after presenting the above statistics, and doctoral thesis level citations and support, I run into people who basically come back with \u2018yeah, well\u2026nu-uh! And what about all the Black people who kill Black people? And what about (insert BS false equivalency I heard from inside my mirrored bubble Fox News and Facebook inspired self-righteousness)???\u2019<\/p>\n<p>After the shooting in El Cajon I made the point that police have killed WAY more Americans than ISIS has. If another nation had killed 800 people this year and counting, we\u2019d be at war.\u00a0 I also made the statement that I\u2019m exponentially more afraid of getting killed by police than I am of getting killed by a terrorist.\u00a0 As you might imagine, some people took exception with this undeniable reality.\u00a0 You can see every thin-skinned, misinformed, knee-jerk reaction that gets vomited up after another unarmed Black man gets killed, and my disassembling of each one of them. I\u2019ve gotten to be very good at it, much better than I ever should have been, since the same flawed and lazy thinking comes up every time.<\/p>\n<p>You can <a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/BDaveWalters2\/posts\/1376093419086143\" target=\"_blank\">read the entire exchange (both the post and comments here)<\/a>, but be advised there is some very intense emotion and ungentlemanly and NSFW language used. I said it ALL there, so it\u2019s easier to direct you to it rather than restate it all here. If you want to know why we\u2019re mad, read it. If you want to know how to explain why we\u2019re mad, read it.<\/p>\n<p><strong>I need you to understand something very important.<\/strong><br \/>\nLast night my youngest daughter was sworn into her Girl Scout troop. As part of the ceremony they said the Pledge of Allegiance, and proceeded to recite the Girl Scout\u2019s Promise. As a part of that, they promise to serve their country, and respect authority.<\/p>\n<p>And you know what? It tied my stomach in knots.<\/p>\n<p>I personally taught them the Pledge, and was so proud seeing them take pride in saying it.\u00a0 But now? When Colin Kaepernick first started kneeling during games I can\u2019t say I agreed with him\u2026and then I saw how he was treated in response. I see how innocent men are murdered on camera and the narrative immediately shifts to what they <em>must<\/em> have done to deserve it. How afraid the heavily armed cops who outnumbered him were, but how he had no right to be afraid in exchange. How there can be no charges against the cop who shot the man in Miami who was literally laying on his back with his hands in the air.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/65.media.tumblr.com\/ab93f90ce767753667d7064dc13a7962\/tumblr_odureyKJxQ1s9c6nao1_1280.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-1580\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/304\/2016\/10\/Cs5KnzpXEAEc7wO-300x300.jpg\" alt=\"Cs5KnzpXEAEc7wO\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" \/><\/a>I am bombarded daily by <em>constant<\/em> reminders that my life does in fact not matter. That we are something dangerous; something less than human, of no value, and not worth saving.\u00a0 And if you think that I\u2019m exaggerating, pop over to the comments section on any article on FoxNews or Breitbart.com about Obama or Kapernick and feast your eyes on the comments.\u00a0 That\u2019s the hill we have to climb.<\/p>\n<p>I love this country. I <em>love<\/em> this country.\u00a0 But the United States of America has been at war with Black people since we first landed on these shores. If you didn\u2019t know that, take the time to look at this <a href=\"https:\/\/storify.com\/Rambeling\/knowledge\" target=\"_blank\">very quick overview of the last 300 years<\/a>. \u00a0And if you feel the need to still dispute that, congratulations: You are part of the problem.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong>I don\u2019t know what to do, America; I\u2019m truly at a loss.\u00a0 You tell me.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Normally I end my articles with links to my website and social media profiles, but I\u2019d rather use this space to spread some more awareness:<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/usuncut.com\/black-lives-matter\/armed-white-people-survive-cops\/\" target=\"_blank\">Examples of white people pointing guns at cops and surviving, which destroys the &#8216;having a gun == death&#8217; myth\u00a0<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.huffingtonpost.com\/john-halstead\/dear-fellow-white-people-_b_11109842.html\" target=\"_blank\">Why \u2018All Lives Matter\u2019 is offensive, unnecessary, and actually racist<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.dnainfo.com\/chicago\/20160707\/englewood\/black-on-black-crime-narrative-is-racist-ignorant-chicago-activists-say\" target=\"_blank\">Why \u2018Black on Black crime\u2019 is an ignorant, racist myth<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.awesomelyluvvie.com\/2014\/12\/stages-injustice-against-black-people.html\" target=\"_blank\">Stages of Reactions to Injustice against Black People<\/a><\/p>\n<p>And last, but certainly not least: <a href=\"https:\/\/thsppl.com\/its-not-about-race-fb140bac8f1#.7mmt8s4hp\" target=\"_blank\">This truly brilliant piece on why Black people are always bringing up race<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>America, my heart is broken. A couple of months ago, I wrote this letter about how awful it feels to be a Black guy who truly loves this country.\u00a0 And you, America, have responded by making things much, much, worse. This article has taken longer than any other to write, because I keep having to&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":450,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[108,47,55,39,29,81,38,92,28,112,78],"tags":[3,34,13,12,109,82,70,36,22,26,25,51,5,50,56],"class_list":["post-1577","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-108","category-communication","category-emotions-2","category-fear","category-happiness","category-healing","category-hope-inspiration","category-loss","category-peace","category-pessimism","category-worry","tag-b-dave-walters","tag-breakthroughs","tag-change","tag-emotions","tag-god","tag-grief","tag-guilt","tag-hope","tag-los-angeles","tag-peacelovemoney-com","tag-psychology","tag-rejection","tag-rise-up","tag-spiritual-but-not-religious","tag-stress"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Dear America, from a Black guy II - A Reason to Smile<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"noindex, nofollow\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Dear America, from a Black guy II - A Reason to Smile\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"America, my heart is broken. A couple of months ago, I wrote this letter about how awful it feels to be a Black guy who truly loves this country.\u00a0 And you, America, have responded by making things much, much, worse. This article has taken longer than any other to write, because I keep having to&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/2016\/10\/dear-america-black-guy-ii.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"A Reason to Smile\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2016-10-06T01:53:34+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2016-10-06T02:47:42+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/files\/2016\/10\/sad-man-300x201.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"B. Dave Walters\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Dear America, from a Black guy II - A Reason to Smile","robots":{"index":"noindex","follow":"nofollow"},"og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Dear America, from a Black guy II - A Reason to Smile","og_description":"America, my heart is broken. A couple of months ago, I wrote this letter about how awful it feels to be a Black guy who truly loves this country.\u00a0 And you, America, have responded by making things much, much, worse. This article has taken longer than any other to write, because I keep having to&hellip;","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/2016\/10\/dear-america-black-guy-ii.html","og_site_name":"A Reason to Smile","article_published_time":"2016-10-06T01:53:34+00:00","article_modified_time":"2016-10-06T02:47:42+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/files\/2016\/10\/sad-man-300x201.jpg"}],"author":"B. 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Dave Walters","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/#\/schema\/person\/bcf42d892eff535aad3a062b7d9534c9","name":"B. Dave Walters","description":"B. Dave Walters is like a mix between Joel Osteen, Tony Robbins, and the Old Spice Guy. He is the winner of the \"Be the Next Beleifnet Featured Blogger\" contest for Beliefnet.com in the Hope &amp; Inspiration category. He is also the host of Rise UP with B. Dave Walters on Party 93.4 FM out of Hudson Valley, New York, as well as a nationally syndicated columnist on the topics of spirituality and relationships for the Examiner.com. He is the author of one book, \"49 Lost Secrets of Peace, Love, and Money\". For years, friends and relatives looked to him for guidance and support during difficult times, and he realized at an early age that his purpose in life was to serve and inspire. While touring as a personal coach with a prominent rock band, he was discovered by one of the top trainers of the Anthony Robbins companies, which lead to him settling down to open and operate a Marketing, Business Services and Coaching firm in Los Angeles. Armed with an insatiable thirst for knowledge, he brings the same discipline and determination that helped him earn Black Belt rankings in Shaolin Kung Fu and Tai Chi to all areas of study and focus. In addition to earning a degree in English from Morehouse College, he has mastered the science of NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) and other communication, healing, counseling and spiritual systems from all over the world. He brings his empathy, insight, and vast personal experience into all his relationships, which has lead to him being one of the most sought after Coaches in the world today. He lives in Burbank, California with his wife and two daughters.","sameAs":["http:\/\/about.me\/bdavewalters"],"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/author\/dwalters"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1577","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/450"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1577"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1577\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1585,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1577\/revisions\/1585"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1577"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1577"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1577"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}