{"id":1159,"date":"2012-11-30T06:25:43","date_gmt":"2012-11-30T06:25:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/areasontosmile\/?p=1159"},"modified":"2012-11-30T06:25:43","modified_gmt":"2012-11-30T06:25:43","slug":"qa-how-can-i-give-up-stress-and-feel-more-centered","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/2012\/11\/qa-how-can-i-give-up-stress-and-feel-more-centered.html","title":{"rendered":"Q&amp;A: \u2018How can I give up stress and feel more centered?\u2019"},"content":{"rendered":"<figure id=\"attachment_1160\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-1160\" style=\"width: 300px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><a href=\"http:\/\/img845.imageshack.us\/img845\/9111\/qunhnh.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-1160\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/304\/2012\/11\/qunhnh-300x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-1160\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">The Center is where you find it<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Question\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/formspring.me\/bdavewalters\">submitted via Formspring<\/a>:<br \/>\n\u201cI have had some amazing changes take place in my life. I have been very blessed and grateful for the things that have been taking place. However, I recently have been feeling uncentered. I pray, I worship, I read scripture, but I still feel off. What can I do to center myself again? I need some suggestions, help or something!<\/p>\n<p>And here is a follow-up to my question&#8230;is it possible that someone really close to you can feed on that same energy and have the same thing happen to them? I was talking to my 17 year-old son this morning, and he just recently made the basketball team. However, over the last couple of weeks, he has been off his game. He\u00a0did really\u00a0well in try-outs and practices, but then all of a sudden everything was off. He can&#8217;t hold on to the ball, not making layups, just not doing anything as normal. So I was telling him this morning how something similar was happening to me with feeling off. I made a comment about how he might be feeding off of me&#8230;is that possible and if so, what should we both do?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Before we begin, one quick note: I have extended my holiday sale on my website! For a short time you can get a huge discount on all the programs and podcasts\u00a0I&#8217;ve\u00a0done on spirituality, relationships, abundance, coaching, and more.\u00a0 Visit my website,\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/www.peacelovemoney.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">PeaceLoveMoney.com<\/a>\u00a0to learn more.<\/p>\n<p>The answer to the second part of the question is simple: Yes, it is very possible he\u2019s feeding off of you.\u00a0 Parents have an incredible impact on their children; especially mothers to their sons.\u00a0 The first part is takes a bit more explanation.<\/p>\n<p>In my\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/www.peacelovemoney.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Coaching work<\/a>, I have worked with many successful people, both at the beginning and end of their careers.\u00a0 And, the saddest thing is to see someone who\u2019s gotten everything they ever wanted in life, and yet they are still miserable; but why does that happen?<\/p>\n<p>There are many reasons why a person might feel \u2018uncentered\u2019, but the most common one is this: Doing the right thing, for the wrong reason. For instance,\u00a0I&#8217;ve\u00a0known many people who pursued fame and fortune in order to make themselves feel \u2018worthy\u2019.\u00a0 But the fact is, worthiness is a feeling that comes from inside you, not outside.\u00a0 So, when they made it to the mountaintop not only did they still feel empty, but actually felt MORE empty because they had everything that should have made them happy, but\u00a0didn&#8217;t.<\/p>\n<p>So, if you are feeling out of alignment, stop and ask yourself why it is you are doing what you\u2019re doing.\u00a0 Why the new job, why leaving the old relationship, or why any other changes that you are making.\u00a0 Yes, many blessings may have arrived out of the blue, but if you\u00a0aren&#8217;t\u00a0firmly rooted in what you really want, they\u2019ll still feel unfulfilling.\u00a0 Remember, you can do anything\u2026but not everything!<\/p>\n<p>If you have trouble figuring out what you want, then\u00a0<a title=\"Q&amp;A: How do I make up my mind, and give up confusion?\" href=\"http:\/\/features.beliefnet.com\/areasontosmile\/2012\/04\/qa-how-do-i-make-up-my-mind-and-give-up-confusion.html\" target=\"_blank\">start by figuring out what you don\u2019t want<\/a>, that is always much easier.<\/p>\n<p>The next thing is to give yourself some credit for all that\u00a0you&#8217;ve\u00a0accomplished, and how far\u00a0you&#8217;ve\u00a0come. \u00a0You&#8217;ve\u00a0had to climb quite a hill to get to where you are now; have you given yourself any credit for it?\u00a0 I have a coaching client who sets big goals to go after, to prove that they are \u2018worthy\u2019, and, they accomplish these goals more often than not.\u00a0 But when they do, rather than feeling like\u00a0they&#8217;ve\u00a0accomplished something, this person chooses to believe that the goal must not have really been worthwhile.\u00a0 After all, if they could do it, it must not have been worth doing\u2026right?<\/p>\n<p>Wrong.<\/p>\n<p>One of the biggest sources of misfortune\u00a0I&#8217;ve\u00a0ever seen is allowing yourself to mentally jump from crisis to crisis without allowing yourself to feel relieved when things actually work out!<\/p>\n<p>The bottom line is: If you want to feel centered, focus on things that make you feel centered.\u00a0 Look at all the blessings\u00a0you&#8217;ve\u00a0been given, and truly take time to thank God \/ The Universe for every single one of them.\u00a0 For all the goals you had that happened, for all the plans you had that\u00a0didn&#8217;t\u00a0happen; for all the pleasant surprises\u00a0you&#8217;ve\u00a0had, and all that are still to come.\u00a0 Go to bed thinking about how excited you are for the blessings of tomorrow, and wake up giving thanks for the new day and it\u2019s infinite potential.<\/p>\n<p>If you are rooted in how good\u00a0you&#8217;ve\u00a0had it up until now, how much better it\u2019s going to be in the future, and especially how bless you really are in this very moment\u2026that\u2019s as centered as you can get.<\/p>\n<p>You are great, and I love you!<br \/>\nAnd if you love me back, click &#8216;share&#8217; up at the top!<\/p>\n<p>B. Dave Walters Writer, Life Coach, and Talk Radio Host<\/p>\n<p>Find out more about me:\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/about.me\/BDaveWalters\">http:\/\/about.me\/BDaveWalters<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Ask me anything:\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/formspring.me\/BDaveWalters\">http:\/\/formspring.me\/BDaveWalters<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Pages I support:<br \/>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/www.facebook.com\/jesusnbuddha\">Jesus and Buddha\u00a0<\/a>&#8212; Interfaith dialog<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.facebook.com\/pages\/Gnostic-Theism\/213600055362473\">Gnostic Theism<\/a>\u00a0&#8212; Religion and Spirituality for the 21st Century (Join the Movement!)<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.facebook.com\/groups\/177682155586539\/\">Love One Another<\/a>\u00a0&#8212; A group for the coolest Spiritual people on the Internet!<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center\"><a title=\"http:\/\/klout.com\/#\/bdavewalters\" href=\"http:\/\/klout.com\/#\/bdavewalters\" target=\"_blank\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/304\/2012\/08\/icon_64x64.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"64\" height=\"64\" \/><\/a><a title=\"http:\/\/www.twitter.com\/BDaveWalters\" href=\"http:\/\/www.twitter.com\/BDaveWalters\" target=\"_blank\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/image3.examiner.com\/images\/blog\/EXID4908\/images\/Button_Twitter.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"50\" height=\"48\" \/><\/a><a title=\"http:\/\/www.facebook.com\/BDaveWalters\" href=\"http:\/\/www.facebook.com\/BDaveWalters\" target=\"_blank\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/image3.examiner.com\/images\/blog\/EXID4908\/images\/Button_Facebook.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"50\" height=\"48\" \/><\/a>\u00a0<a title=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/bdavewalters\" href=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/bdavewalters\" target=\"_blank\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/image3.examiner.com\/images\/blog\/EXID4908\/images\/Button_YouTube.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"49\" height=\"48\" \/><\/a><a title=\"http:\/\/www.myspace.com\/bdavewalters\" href=\"http:\/\/www.myspace.com\/bdavewalters\" target=\"_blank\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/image3.examiner.com\/images\/blog\/EXID4908\/images\/Button_MySpace.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"50\" height=\"48\" \/><\/a><a title=\"http:\/\/formspring.me\/bdavewalters\" href=\"http:\/\/formspring.me\/bdavewalters\" target=\"_blank\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/image3.examiner.com\/images\/blog\/EXID4908\/images\/email_button.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"47\" height=\"48\" \/><\/a><a title=\"http:\/\/klout.com\/#\/bdavewalters\" href=\"http:\/\/klout.com\/#\/bdavewalters\" target=\"_blank\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/304\/2012\/08\/icon_64x64.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"64\" height=\"64\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Question\u00a0submitted via Formspring: \u201cI have had some amazing changes take place in my life. I have been very blessed and grateful for the things that have been taking place. However, I recently have been feeling uncentered. I pray, I worship, I read scripture, but I still feel off. What can I do to center myself&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":450,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[37,47,55,80,39,35,15,93,114,29,81,38,31,46,88,28,112,41,49,48,17,78],"tags":[3,34,13,12,115,11,109,36,14,22,23,26,25,42,50,18,56,113],"class_list":["post-1159","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-change-2","category-communication","category-emotions-2","category-family","category-fear","category-getting-over-it","category-god","category-gratitude","category-guilt","category-happiness","category-healing","category-hope-inspiration","category-love-2","category-love-yourself","category-mind","category-peace","category-pessimism","category-positive-thinking","category-religion","category-spirituality","category-universal-law","category-worry","tag-b-dave-walters","tag-breakthroughs","tag-change","tag-emotions","tag-family","tag-gnostic-theism","tag-god","tag-hope","tag-life-coach","tag-los-angeles","tag-love","tag-peacelovemoney-com","tag-psychology","tag-self-talk","tag-spiritual-but-not-religious","tag-spiritual-coach","tag-stress","tag-universal-law"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Q&amp;A: \u2018How can I give up stress and feel more centered?\u2019 - A Reason to Smile<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"noindex, nofollow\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Q&amp;A: \u2018How can I give up stress and feel more centered?\u2019 - A Reason to Smile\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Question\u00a0submitted via Formspring: \u201cI have had some amazing changes take place in my life. I have been very blessed and grateful for the things that have been taking place. However, I recently have been feeling uncentered. I pray, I worship, I read scripture, but I still feel off. What can I do to center myself&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/2012\/11\/qa-how-can-i-give-up-stress-and-feel-more-centered.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"A Reason to Smile\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2012-11-30T06:25:43+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/areasontosmile\/files\/2012\/11\/qunhnh-300x300.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"B. Dave Walters\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Q&amp;A: \u2018How can I give up stress and feel more centered?\u2019 - A Reason to Smile","robots":{"index":"noindex","follow":"nofollow"},"og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Q&amp;A: \u2018How can I give up stress and feel more centered?\u2019 - A Reason to Smile","og_description":"Question\u00a0submitted via Formspring: \u201cI have had some amazing changes take place in my life. I have been very blessed and grateful for the things that have been taking place. However, I recently have been feeling uncentered. I pray, I worship, I read scripture, but I still feel off. 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He is the author of one book, \"49 Lost Secrets of Peace, Love, and Money\". For years, friends and relatives looked to him for guidance and support during difficult times, and he realized at an early age that his purpose in life was to serve and inspire. While touring as a personal coach with a prominent rock band, he was discovered by one of the top trainers of the Anthony Robbins companies, which lead to him settling down to open and operate a Marketing, Business Services and Coaching firm in Los Angeles. Armed with an insatiable thirst for knowledge, he brings the same discipline and determination that helped him earn Black Belt rankings in Shaolin Kung Fu and Tai Chi to all areas of study and focus. In addition to earning a degree in English from Morehouse College, he has mastered the science of NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) and other communication, healing, counseling and spiritual systems from all over the world. He brings his empathy, insight, and vast personal experience into all his relationships, which has lead to him being one of the most sought after Coaches in the world today. 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