{"id":1010,"date":"2012-06-03T08:03:48","date_gmt":"2012-06-03T08:03:48","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/areasontosmile\/?p=1010"},"modified":"2012-06-03T08:03:48","modified_gmt":"2012-06-03T08:03:48","slug":"qa-how-do-i-tell-my-partner-about-my-sexual-fetish","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/2012\/06\/qa-how-do-i-tell-my-partner-about-my-sexual-fetish.html","title":{"rendered":"Q&A: \u2018How do I tell my partner about my sexual fetish?\u2019"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"\"<\/a>
Everybody is into *something*<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Question submitted via Formspring<\/a>:
\n\u201cHello, Dave; I have a foot fetish, and I am scared to tell my girlfriend of 4 months about it. I’m scared that when she finds out, she’ll get grossed out. Should I tell her? And is there something wrong with me? I’ve had it since I can remember.\u201d<\/p>\n

The simple answer is: no, there is nothing wrong with you; and yes, you should tell her.
\nIt is true that having a foot fetish (being sexually aroused by feet, for the uninitiated), may be unusual, but it\u2019s probably more common than you\u2019d think.\u00a0 Add to that, it\u2019s a relatively harmless thing to be turned on by; it\u2019s not like you are into hurting people, or children, or something illegal.<\/p>\n

As for why you should tell her, the reason is simple: if you can\u2019t communicate, you don\u2019t have a relationship.\u00a0 Healthy intimacy is the foundation of a romantic relationship; without that, you are just friends.\u00a0 And if you are keeping something from her, something you feel is \u2018wrong\u2019 with you no less, then you are always going to have a big block in your communication and <\/em>\u00a0your intimacy; not good.<\/p>\n

The fact that it\u2019s only been four months is actually a good thing; since if she IS totally grossed out by it, you won\u2019t have wasted years with someone who is sexually incompatible with you.<\/p>\n

The real challenge will be how you reveal it to her; don\u2019t just blurt out I \u201cI have a foot fetish\u201d, or turn on a foot fetish DVD. My suggestion is give her an absolutely mind blowing<\/em> foot massage, and proceed to give her the most enjoyable sexual experience of her life; do every little thing you know she enjoys, and make it all about her.<\/p>\n

And when she is lying there, as exhausted as she is satisfied, just casually mention, \u201cI don\u2019t know why, but something about feet just really turns me on\u201d.
\nOnce she sees what\u2019s in it for her, you\u2019ll never have another problem with it!<\/p>\n

You are great, and I love you!
\nAnd if you love me back, click ‘share’ up at the top!<\/p>\n

B. Dave Walters
\nWriter, Life Coach, and Talk Radio Host<\/p>\n

Find out more about me:
\nhttp:\/\/about.me\/BDaveWalter<\/a>s<\/p>\n

Ask me anything:
\nhttp:\/\/formspring.me\/BDaveWalters<\/a><\/p>\n

Pages I support:
\nJesus and Buddha<\/a>\u00a0— Interfaith dialog<\/p>\n

Gnostic Theism<\/a>\u00a0— Religion and Spirituality for the 21st Century (Join the Movement!)<\/p>\n

Love One Another<\/a>\u00a0— A group for the coolest Spiritual people on the Internet!<\/p>\n

\u00a0\"\"<\/a>\"\"<\/a>\"\"<\/a>\"\"<\/a>\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Question submitted via Formspring: \u201cHello, Dave; I have a foot fetish, and I am scared to tell my girlfriend of 4 months about it. I’m scared that when she finds out, she’ll get grossed out. Should I tell her? And is there something wrong with me? I’ve had it since I can remember.\u201d The simple…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":450,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[37,47,55,39,114,29,81,38,31,28,41,43,48,78],"tags":[3,34,13,12,54,11,36,14,22,23,26,25,51,24,50],"class_list":["post-1010","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-change-2","category-communication","category-emotions-2","category-fear","category-guilt","category-happiness","category-healing","category-hope-inspiration","category-love-2","category-peace","category-positive-thinking","category-relationships-2","category-spirituality","category-worry","tag-b-dave-walters","tag-breakthroughs","tag-change","tag-emotions","tag-getting-married","tag-gnostic-theism","tag-hope","tag-life-coach","tag-los-angeles","tag-love","tag-peacelovemoney-com","tag-psychology","tag-rejection","tag-relationships","tag-spiritual-but-not-religious"],"yoast_head":"\nQ&A: \u2018How do I tell my partner about my sexual fetish?\u2019 - A Reason to Smile<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/areasontosmile\/2012\/06\/qa-how-do-i-tell-my-partner-about-my-sexual-fetish.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Q&A: \u2018How do I tell my partner about my sexual fetish?\u2019 - A Reason to Smile\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Question submitted via Formspring: \u201cHello, Dave; I have a foot fetish, and I am scared to tell my girlfriend of 4 months about it. 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He is the author of one book, \"49 Lost Secrets of Peace, Love, and Money\". For years, friends and relatives looked to him for guidance and support during difficult times, and he realized at an early age that his purpose in life was to serve and inspire. While touring as a personal coach with a prominent rock band, he was discovered by one of the top trainers of the Anthony Robbins companies, which lead to him settling down to open and operate a Marketing, Business Services and Coaching firm in Los Angeles. Armed with an insatiable thirst for knowledge, he brings the same discipline and determination that helped him earn Black Belt rankings in Shaolin Kung Fu and Tai Chi to all areas of study and focus. In addition to earning a degree in English from Morehouse College, he has mastered the science of NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) and other communication, healing, counseling and spiritual systems from all over the world. 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