{"id":198,"date":"2011-12-28T15:30:05","date_gmt":"2011-12-28T15:30:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/amomentofchange\/?p=198"},"modified":"2011-12-28T15:41:01","modified_gmt":"2011-12-28T15:41:01","slug":"the-danger-of-living-for-what-should-have-been","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/amomentofchange\/2011\/12\/the-danger-of-living-for-what-should-have-been.html","title":{"rendered":"The Danger Of Living For What Should Have Been"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>Sherry Gaba LCSW, Psychotherapist, Life & Recovery Coach is featured Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author of \u201cThe Law of Sobriety\u201d<\/a>\u00a0which uses the law of attraction to recover from any addiction. Please download your copy of \u201cManifest Holistic Health<\/a>\u201d from Sherry\u2019s Enrich Your Life Series. Contact Sherry at\u00a0sherry@sgabatherapy.com<\/a>\u00a0for webinars, teleseminars, coaching packages and speaking engagements. Listen to Sherry on\u00a0\u201cA Moment of Change with Sherry Gaba\u201d<\/a>on CBS Radio.<\/p>\n

Perception is everything. \u00a0 \u00a0Constantly berating \u00a0yourself of what “should have been” in your life will only bring you what you don’t want. \u00a0 When you are focused on what should be as opposed to what is or what can be you are automatically in a negative thought process that looks for others to pin the blame for the reality of the situation.<\/p>\n

For example, if I am constantly thinking that what should have been is that I never become an addict, always had job of my dreams and always had the “things” I want in life I am focused on what \u00a0I do not have<\/em>. Since my thoughts are negative everywhere I look I see what I think I can’t have. \u00a0The Universe does not decipher between negative and positive thoughts. \u00a0This may include people with great professional careers, individuals that are successfully in recovery and people that have a picture perfect relationship. I constantly envy, covet and desire their achievements while failing to see that I too have the potential to reach these aspirations.<\/p>\n

It is essential to give up trying to be someone else and to have the same “things” as others. Instead, look at just what “is” or what values, talents and gifts that you bring to the table. Look towards the big picture you want to achieve as opposed to the little tangibles that are markers of this type of achievement. The positive change in your world will be amazing and you will find that opportunities to achieve your big picture goals begin to present themselves. In reality they were always there; it is just the negative thoughts that overrode the positives in your life were blocking them from view.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Sherry Gaba LCSW, Psychotherapist, Life & Recovery Coach is featured Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author of \u201cThe Law of Sobriety\u201d\u00a0which uses the law of attraction to recover from any addiction. Please download your copy of \u201cManifest Holistic Health\u201d from Sherry\u2019s Enrich Your Life Series. Contact Sherry at\u00a0sherry@sgabatherapy.com\u00a0for webinars, teleseminars, coaching packages and…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":402,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-198","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nThe Danger Of Living For What Should Have Been - A Moment of Change<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/amomentofchange\/2011\/12\/the-danger-of-living-for-what-should-have-been.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The Danger Of Living For What Should Have Been - A Moment of Change\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Sherry Gaba LCSW, Psychotherapist, Life & Recovery Coach is featured Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author of \u201cThe Law of Sobriety\u201d\u00a0which uses the law of attraction to recover from any addiction. Please download your copy of \u201cManifest Holistic Health\u201d from Sherry\u2019s Enrich Your Life Series. 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