If you don’t believe in yourself, other people are going to agree with you. This simple fact can get in the way of career success, relationships, and cause you to miss out on having a rich, fulfilling life. The key to overcoming self-doubt and increasing your confidence is to change the ways in which you interact with the world, be the best person you can be, and to find ways to be successful. These aren’t easy things to accomplish, but if you try a few of the following actionable tips, you’ll make headway in no time.
1. Engage in a Little ‘Man Spreading’
Pay attention to your body language. When you sit in a public area, do you find yourself trying to take up as little space as possible? That may be the polite thing to do when space is at a premium, but if that’s not an issue, you are sending out the wrong message. You are telling everybody around you that you don’t deserve your fair share of space in the room. So, stop scooting down to the far end the bench, and claim your space.
2. Say No Without Apologizing
Practice the following phrases:
- No, thank you.
- I'm not interested.
- That doesn't work for me.
These are completely appropriate phrases to indicate that your answer to a particular request, suggestion, or question is no. These words and phrases aren’t mean, they aren’t hurtful, and they certainly are not rude. In fact, if you are pressed for an apology or explanation beyond these simple words, you are not the one being impolite.
3. Rediscover Old Talents and Hobbies
One way to increase your self-confidence is to engage in activities that you enjoy and that highlight your talents. Unfortunately, the less confident that we feel, the less likely we are go to keep up with hobbies that make us happy. If you’ve been ignoring passion, it’s time to pick it back up again.
4. Set Challenging but Attainable Fitness Goals
If you haven’t incorporated working out into your daily routine, you should really consider it. Even taking a daily walk can make you feel better about yourself. Once you’ve started getting some exercise, or if you’ve already got a workout routine in place, set some challenging goals for yourself. Each victory, even the small ones will be a confidence booster.
5. Practice Good Self Care
They may seem like little things, but dressing in nice clothing, getting enough sleep, getting your haircut, seeing the doctor on a regular basis, even indulging in the occasional massage is very important. Feeling good about your health, your appearance, and enjoying a sense of physical well-being indicates that you place value and importance on your wellbeing.
There are many different types of meditation that can result in higher confidence and help you to eliminate feelings of self doubt. Mindfulness meditation is a form of meditation that requires you to be in the moment and aware of your surroundings and feelings. It helps with emotional regulation. Visualization allows you mentally walk yourself through situations that are a challenge to your confidence with any result that you want.
7. Make a List of Your Values
One common trait among good leaders is that they know what they stand for. They know their values and they make sure that their actions line up with those values. It may seem like a small thing. In reality, this is extremely important. Values are meaningless unless they are supported by our daily actions. In fact, if you aren’t living up to your values, you might end each day feeling a bit like a sellout. So, make a list, then take a look at your daily life. Does everything add up?
8. Stop Apologizing Unless You’ve Done Something Wrong
You should apologize when you are late for an event. You should apologize if you forget an appointment. You should apologize if you carelessly hurt another person’s feelings. You should not apologize for expecting somebody to do their job. You should not apologize for expressing that your feelings are hurt. You should most certainly not apologize for walking in the same vicinity as another person.
9. Hang Out With Uplifting People
Beware of emotional vampires and naysayers. Some people have a knack for undermining your confidence, and making you doubt your abilities. Many of them may not do this on purpose. Unfortunately, that doesn’t make their negative impact any better. Avoid these people, and focus on spending your time with people who will remind you of your worth and help you feel good about yourself.
10. Recognize and Reward Your Accomplishments
You don’t need to wait until you’ve achieved some major goal to celebrate. Your small victories are important and you should do things to acknowledge them and reward yourself. The rewards don’t need to be extravagant. Sometimes a mental pat on the back is all it takes.