Thy Will or My Will?

Healing doesn't have to be a tug-of-war between God and you


: For the past eight years, I have been seriously ill because of diabetes, circulatory insufficiency, chronic myeloid leukemia (CML), and a brutal Roman Catholic family. Just last night I realized the conflict behind my conflict.

On the one hand, many people, including Larry Dossey, endorse prayer as a means to healing, prosperity, new life, new understanding. And prayer is grounded in "Thy will be done"--not mine.

On the other hand, Wayne Dyer, Carl Simonton, Shakti Gawain, and Louise Hay embrace visualization and imagery for healing, prosperity, new life, new understanding. But visualization and imagery are honed toward the individual's personal choices--not Thy will but my will.

How do I know which way is right? What's the truth? How can I pray and yet visualize and image my body healing itself? Is this why I'm not healing? I want to live, but is it my will or God's?



. You certainly don't ask shallow questions, do you?

Let's see. I'm not sure I agree with you about the way you split up who is in which corner. Nor am I crazy abut this either/or situation that you've created. I think it's both, and your absolutism (which is "brutal" by nature) has put you in a terrible dilemma.

But let me back up a little and say something about our culture as a whole, and then your beliefs in particular. We Americans seem to love leaning into some rather simplistic and unrealistic ways of looking at life. On the one hand, our culture is wonderfully optimistic, generous and sky's-the-limit creative; on the other hand, we are grandiose, narcissistic and suffer from spiritual materialism. We think we can make anything happen. We think if we do everything right, we can have it our way. That's third-grade nonsense. Life isn't supposed to be happy; it's supposed to be meaningful.

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Belleruth Naparstek
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