Twelve ways to heal depression and find the true self.
By Kenneth Porter, M.D.
An ancient Scandinavian fairy tale tells of a kingdom falling into ruin that can only be saved if the beautiful princess marries a dragon. The reluctant princess is instructed by a wise woman to wear 10 layers of wedding dresses and to ask the dragon to shed a layer of his skin each time she sheds a dress. When in fact he does so, the dragon stands revealed as a prince, and the couple and kingdom live happily ever after.
Like the dragon in the story, depression can be healed, and we can find our true self, the prince in each of us. The transformation requires the help of the princess--the feminine wisdom that is also in each of us. And even though it may seem strange, depression, when viewed in this way, can be a gift and a teacher. It allows us to grow.
Depression, which afflicts about 19 million Americans each year, consists of four "dreadful d's": deadness, defectiveness, despair, and defeat. When we're depressed:
- we don't feel alive (deadness)
- we feel there's something wrong with us (defectiveness)
- we lose power and hope (despair)
- we can't act (defeat)
Awareness, acceptance, appreciation, and action can all be used in order to heal depression in 12 different ways:
1. Use awareness to transform deadness. Try mindfulness meditation, as taught by various Buddhist traditions. Let yourself feel the actual physical and emotional sensations of the depression. With practice, you may discover deeper feelings of hurt and sadness. When you are able to feel these, the depression may decrease.
2. Use understanding, another aspect of awareness, to transform defectiveness. Depression often occurs when we are in legitimate emotional pain but misinterpret the pain as being an indication that something is wrong with us. Remind yourself that emotional pain is a healthy part of life and does not mean you are defective.