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Shane Whalen
This Prayer Circle is Dedicated to my son Shane Whalen Who Passed Away On March 15, 1999 at the Age of 24, & All Other Children


Start a prayer circle for bereaved parents who have lost a child.


There are many of us out there who have lost a child, and it is devastating. It changes the outlook on life, plunges you into a depression, and you think that the feelings and thoughts you have nobody else could possibly relate to. I think a prayer circle for bereaved parents would only benefit us and help us on our journey of grief. This Circle is one of Love, where a Grieving Parent can safely come to for Prayers, and to talk about their feelings.

 
Shaner -10/14/2000
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deborahpoo
5/15/2002 19:22

dear shaner, you are right that valentines card means the world to me. i can still picture him making it even though i wasn't even there. i just wish like all the moms we would still be getting beautiful things from are sons instead of the memories that we cherish. i hope all the moms on this sight spent mothers day thinking of all the things that they cherish about there beautiful children. i know i did and i cried wishing my michael was still here with me.

dear father, please give the moms the strenght and courage that we need to be able to go on for day to day and try to make the pain ease a little, i ask this in your name the father, amen

luv debby


shaner
5/15/2002 19:36

Hi Debbie, I know sweetie, it's very hard, we'd much rather have them with us instead of looking back at the time we did spend together, but now our memories are so important to us, we hold on to them for dear life, for they connect us to our child and keep them warm in our heart until we see them again. You'll always have Michael's special Valentine's Day card for you, and it'll always hold a special place in your heart. God bless you, Debby, your prayer for us all is so beautiful, and our prayers and love go right back to you,
Luv Sandy


pleaselordapregnancyforme
5/15/2002 20:15

hi shaner and everyone....i just wanted to say that i was thinking of you all on mother's day. as you may remember, this would have been a big mother's day for me, too....my first. our baby would have been 8 mos. old. well, i find out tomorrow if i'm pregnant or not (not expecting to be at all - this was an untreated cycle), but would ask for your prayers in the coming months...we have five more tries to get pregnant (insurance), then that's it. i just wanted to let you all know i was thinking of you. take care.


mej80
5/15/2002 23:02

hi all! i continue to pray for each and every one of you and i hope you are all doing well! i especially pray for you pleaselordapregnancyforme. i know this must be a trying time for you and i pray that you continue to have strength and faith during this time! i'll be praying and thinking of you all! mindy
"In so many areas of my life I am finding that I really can't, but God can...and maybe thats the whole point" Emilie Barnes


shaner
5/16/2002 07:35

Hello plapfm, it's really nice to see you posting again, I've often wondered how you were doing. Yes, Mother's Day is such a difficult one for us, I'm sorry to hear that you had a bad time of it also. I don't want to raise any false hopes for you, but maybe this time you are pregnant, we all really hope so! If not, keep trying, you know that you have our love and prayers. Take good care of yourself and please let us know, may God bless you and your husband,
Luv Sandy


shaner
5/16/2002 07:38

Hello mej80, it's so nice to see you posting and giving support and prayers to plapfm, I know she appreciates it, as we all here appreciate your wonderful support. Our prayers are with you and our love for whatever in life that you may be having trials with, and I just love the little quotes that you always put at the end of your post, they're always very uplifting!
Our love and prayers to you,
Luv Sandy


GodChaser77
5/16/2002 18:50

Please god help this mother who lost her son in all her difficult times. Please god give her the strength to move foward out of her depression and to live her life as happy as she can god please let her know that you love her and that she is special. Please help her in her everyday life god because it is hard to lose someone that you love so much.


shaner
5/16/2002 19:03

Hello GodChaser77, and welcome to this Circle. Thank you for your beautiful prayer, so lovingly put. It is very hard to lose someone that you love, and it's devastating to lose a child. It has a grief all of it's own. It takes longer to come to some sort of acceptance of that loss, and it's one that we learn to live with, time takes away the sharp pain, but leaves in it's place a dull ache. But with lots of help, love and prayer, leaning heavily on God, we go on and live our lives, one day at a time. May God bless you for posting here, we all appreciate everyone's prayers so much, especially those who fortunately haven't been touched by this loss. You're in our thoughts and our prayers,
Luv Sandy


dovesfromheaven
5/19/2002 08:56

Dear Sandy, How are you? It's been a tough week hasn't it? with Mother's Day and all for everyone I can see. I want you to know I do keep you and everyone here at this loving circle in my prayers. I think of you often and wonder how you are. This weekend the 19th and 20th it's been exactly 2-1/2 years now since Joseph died. It's so hard when these dates come around too. I feel so much heartache here lately and I don't know why really. I have been doing fairly OK up until recently. I'm not sure if it's the wedding coming up and the babies or what. I just miss him so as I know you must miss your sweet and precious Shane too. Isn't his birthday in May?
I thought I had read that you said that somewhere in another post. I'm praying for you and your family to get through these tough times. The pain never leaves does it?
The dresses are coming along great and I feel confident I'll get them done! I'll have to won't I? I had the first fitting Friday and it fit her perfectly. I felt really good about that. I was worried that I'd have to take some apart and redo them! So I'm on a roll with them now! We have all of our yard work done in preparation for the rehearsal dinner (we are having it here). It's been such a pleasure for me to be able to work outside with the flowers. We also have a vegetable garden. We specialize in tomatoes and a wide variety of hot peppers so that we can make our own salsa. We keep busy needless to say! But the flowers are my favorite thing to do. It does give me alot of peace. I dedicate it all to Joe and the Lord! On Wed my daughter has an ultrasound to find out what her and her husband are going to have. Everything is going great for her this time around. We already have a little granddaughter coming in August. Maybe we'll have two!
Dear Lord, I ask you to hold Sandy and her family to close to You during the tough times. Bless them today and everyday as they grieve their loss of their sweet son Shane. In Jesus Name, Amen. God Bless you Sandy!
Love, Yvonne<><


shaner
5/19/2002 09:29

Hello Yvonne, it's so nice to hear from you again! I'm not doing too badly, yes, we've gotten over Mother's Day, one of the hardest in my opinion, and you're right, Shane's birthday is on the 28th of this month, he would have been 28. And you have your own special days, the 19-20, the Anniversary of Joe's death, gosh sweetie, that's also a very hard time to go through, it plunges us right back to the very day we last had them with us. No wonder you feel such heartache lately, with Joe's Anniversary and the wedding of your other son, it's a bittersweet time for you. No, I don't believe that the pain ever does leave, we just learn how to live with it, with God's help.
I'm so happy to read that all those dresses lovingly made by your hands, will be ready, it surely must be a great load off your mind, but I bet that you loved doing it, and I know your son and future daughter-in-law must appreciate it so much! That's a wonderful thing for you to do for them all. Your garden sounds beautiful, and will make a lovely backdrop for the Reception, and I just know that Doves are going to show up for the day too!
Yum, I love Salsa, I put it on everything, from tortillas to baked potatoes! We live in an apt., so my gardening consists of containers, but I can still grow many flowers, herbs, and this year I'm going to try tomatoes.
I know that Our Lord and Joe must love your beautiful dedicated garden to them, I love nature, you can 'see' God's Hand in it! I'm very happy for you that it gives you peace. You deserve it, we all do! I know that the ultra-sound will be OK, and soon you'll have your little grandchildren around you, and I know you'll love them to bits. Thank you for your sweet prayer, Yvonne, and I pray for you that you have more and more days of peace, and remember all the happy memories of Joe this weekend, that Our Lord holds you close to Him as you get through the weekend and the wedding. May God bless you, Yvonne, today and also everyday, and let us know how the wedding preparations are coming, lots of love and prayers to you,
Luv Sandy


valarienku1
5/19/2002 16:07

My heart truly goes out to each and every person that has lost a child. The first anniversary of my neice's death, my sister's daughter, just passed. We all miss her very much, but know that God just needed to call her home sooner than we thought he would. We know she's an angel now and she is with us everyday. My sister and I are closer than ever now, because a year and a half ago, I lost my baby, only 8 weeks old. Angels have shown me that my neice is taking care of my baby, but both being angels now, God is taking care of them both. It is so hard when you lose someone that you love more than life itself. But we have to remember that God needed them for a reason. He needed to call them home.


DEBORAHPOO
5/19/2002 16:44

DEAR VALARIENKU1,

WELCOME TO THE CIRCLE. BEING A PARENT WHO LOST A CHILD I KNOW WHAT YOU AND YOUR SISTER ARE GOING THROUGH. 2 YEARS IS COMING UP FOR MY SON AND I KNOW IT WILL BE PAINFUL. I THINK OF ALL THE BEAUTIFUL MEMORIES I HAVE OF MY SON AND I'M SO THANKFUL FOR THEM. MY FAMILY IS MORE CLOSER NOW FROM THE LOSS OF MY SON. WE ALL STAY IN TOUCH AND MAKE ANY CHANGES TO SEE EACH OTHER AS OFTEN AS WE CAN. MY HEART GOSE OUT TO YOU AND YOUR SISTER. EVERY ONE HERE AT THE CIRCLE HELPED ME WITH COMFORTING WORDS AND PRAYERS AND THEY WILL YOU TOO.

DEAR GOD PLEASE HELP THIS FAMILY AND GIVE THEM THE STRENGHT AND GUIDE THEM TO THE RIGHT PATH AND TRY AND EASE THE PAIN THEY HAVE DURING THIS ROUGH TIME THEY ARE HAVING RIGHT NOW, I ASK THIS IN YOUR NAME THE FATHER, AMEN.


shaner
5/19/2002 18:02

Hello valerianku1, and thank you for posting here. All of us here understand, we've all lost children of varying ages. I'm so happy that you found this Circle. I'm so sorry about your loss and your sister's, isn't God wonderful to provide the two of you to lean on during a very devastating time in both your lives. You each understood the other's pain, and could help each other out with love and support. I'm sure that your niece is your little one's Angel, and now you have two Angels, watching over you, as does your sister. Our love and prayers are with you and your sister, may God in His goodness bless you both abundantaly and give you the necessary spiritual and physical strength to get through this together. Post here whenever you feel like it, we all care,
Luv Sandy


shaner
5/19/2002 18:07

Hi Debby, nice to see you posting again too. Your son's Anniversary will be a difficult day for you and your family, but hold on dear to all the wonderful memories that he and you share in your heart. They are so precious to all of us! It's also nice to read that your own family has gotten closer, something good came out of something devastating.
My love and prayers are with you still,
Luv Sandy


valarienku1
5/20/2002 09:01

Thank you so very much Deborah and Shaner. Your words mean so much. I sat and read memorials yesterday and just cried for hours. If you would like to see the memorial and know a little bit more about my baby, it is under Heib. Thanks again for your kind words. I am so glad I found this prayer circle and others that I can talk to about this. Love and prayers for you all.


shaner
5/20/2002 11:34

Hello valerinku1, I'm so happy that we've been able to help you out a bit, you're now part of this wonderful Circle filled with beautiful moms who have lost a child, or in some cases, children. We all get love and support from each other, here you can say whatever is on your heart, and you will be listened to and your feelings will be honoured. I'm very happy that you found this Circle too, we're so happy that you're here! You post here whenever you want to, sweetie, and our love and prayers go out to you, as you deal with your loss. We all here know how that feels. I'll definitely look up your Memorial for your sweet baby, and post a little something there, once again, welcome, and may God give you some peace today,
Luv Sandy


mej80
5/20/2002 21:53

hello all! i hope you all are doing well and finding strength in the Lord.
welcome valarienku1! i pray that the Lord will strengthen you during this time of lose and also strengthen your sister - i pray that both of you are brought peace and comfort during the lose of your children. i am so happy that you found this wonderful circle -there are soooo many amazing people here and they are all a source of strength and friendship - it is awesome to know that so many people are praying for you!!! talk to you all soon - mindy :)
"When you have Christ, you have everything you need!" Charles Stanley


dovesfromheaven
5/21/2002 08:41

Dear Valarienku1,
I am so sorry for your loss of your precious little 8 week old baby and that of your sister's daughter. You have my sympathy and prayers for comfort and peace. These precious little children are your little 'Angels' in heaven now watching over each other and their loving Moms they left behind. It is the most difficult thing in life to lose a child that we love so dearly and they are so close to our hearts. I hope that you and your sister will continue to be a support for each other as the years pass. I know it has happened to us in our family too. We lost a 16 yr old niece 18 mo after our son died and then only 3 weeks after she died my brother's son passed away unexpectedly. So now the 3 of us have this link with each other and we can share and truly know how each other feels. Not that you'd ever want anyone else to go through the pain of losing a child but it does help to have someone that you can talk to about it. It is so nice that you found this circle to give support and get some too. It is a real Godsend to me and all the other Moms here to be able to come and express just how we feel. And I am thankful for that.
Dear Father in Heaven, I come before Your throne and ask You to wrap Your loving arms around ValarienKu1 and her sister during these most difficult times of their losses of their little children. I pray Lord that You would surround them with Your Peace and Comfort and let them know in some way that You are with them always even in their grief of their precious little children. In Jesus Name, Amen. God Bless you ValarienKu1!
Love, Yvonne<><


shaner
5/21/2002 09:51

Hello Mindy (mej80), it's really nice to see you posting again, I can't tell you how much it means to all of us! It's so sweet and loving of you to pray for all of us and pop in here and say hello, and give us some food for thought at the end of each of your posts. May God in His goodness bless you in whatever way He knows you need, and keep you safely under His wing. We all love you and appreciated your prayers,
Luv Sandy


shaner
5/21/2002 09:59

Hi Yvonne, I read your beautiful post to valerianku1 and I'm so sorry, I didn't know you and your family had all those losses of children. How devastating for a family to go through!
You all do have each other for support and understanding, for nobody else understands what we go through when we lose one of our children as another parent who has, God bless them. I know you're busy with the wedding plans, and your garden, I pray that you have picture-perfect weather for the day. My continued love and prayers to you,
Luv Sandy


Babbs
5/21/2002 11:37

Hello Sandy, I hope you are doing well. Needless to say, these last 2 weeks have brought many unexpected feelings forward. I know I should expect it but it usually sneaks up on me in so many different ways. I think Mothers Day was difficult and the days there after were rather hard as well. Maybe I'm learning that this is just how it will be from now on. I'm willing to accept this and try to move on, but sometimes it's very hard to let go of the past. Miranda and I had a lovely day together on Mothers Day. I could sense her pain as well as my own. We didn't release balloons that day but I thought of you and your husband, and Shane that day. I'm sure it was a beautiful experience when you released the balloons in his memory.I am sure he was honored by that and he was sending his love back to you both at that very moment. I hope to one day travel up near your home and see all the beauty that is available in that part of the world. If I do, I'd love to meet you and your husband. Perhaps we can do that before too long. I'll look forward to that day. I'm still looking for a job and I'm anxious to get back to my working routine, but hopefully it won't be long. I'm thankful for the time I've had to heal and explore so many memories. I'm sure I'll continue to do this for years to come. I'm sure we all will. God Bless,
Love, Barbara


deborahpoo
5/21/2002 13:57

HELLO EVERYONE,
TODAY AT WORK A GOOD FRIEND OF MINE WAS OUT. SHE IS GOING THROUGH A TOUGH TIME RIGHT NOW. HER NEPHEW WHO WAS ONLY 7 MONTHS OLD PASSED AWAY YESTURDAY. HER FAMILY IS VERY CLOSE AND NOW THEY WILL BE EVEN CLOSER. SHE HAS HAD SUCH A ROUGH YEAR WITH HER FATHER HAVING SURGERY AND HER 2 BOYS BEING SICK THAT SHE USED UP ALL HER PERSONAL AND SICK TIME AT WORK AND NOW WILL BE OUT FOR THE REST OF THE WEEK. HER HUSBAND HAS BEEN LAYED OFF OF WORK AND JUST STARTED A NEW JOB THIS WEEK AND SHE REALLY NEEDS SOME PRAYER RIGHT NOW. I THOUGHT OF THIS CIRCLE OF MOTHERS TO HELP HER THROUGH THIS TIME.
DEAR FATHER, PLEASE HELP MY FRIEND AND GIVE HER THE STRENGHT FOR SHE REALLY NEEDS RIGHT NOW, GOD ALSO HELP HER TO SEE THAT THERE IS AN HAPPY ENDING AND THINGS ARE DONE IN WAYS THAT WE MAY OR MAY NOT LIKE BUT FOR A REASON, I ASK THIS IN YOUR NAME THE FATHER, AMEN.

LUV DEBBY


valarienku1
5/21/2002 18:51

Yvonne and Mindy, Thank you so much for your words of prayer. I truly thank God that I found this circle. It means so much to me. Mother's Day was kind of hard. This would have been my first. Thanks to you all, I feel like I am finally understanding that what I have been feeling is normal and that it is okay that I think about my baby everyday. And I know I will continue to do so. Now that I have found this circle, it will make it a little easier. Thank you all for your prayers and kind words. God bless you all.


shaner
5/21/2002 19:13

Hello Barbara, it's wonderful to hear from you again! I'm so sorry that you're having a difficult time right now, but you're progressing along in your grief, and as you do, many, many things do come up and do creep in, when you least expect it or them. You may not even be thinking or feeling anything in particular, then wham, it hits you, and it hits hard. I can only speak for myself, but after three years, my grief has settled into a quiet sadness, with the odd harsh ping, and I'm fully prepared to live with this. We can never go back to our old selves, our lives are forever changed, we just have to look for a different way of living, and learning to love a sunset again. It's still very early in your own Journey, Barbara, so take it easy, expect to feel these things and emotions, it takes quite a while to work through it all, and then come to your own place of living your life without Jason physically in it. I don't mean to make you sad, but from lots of experience talking and dealing with other moms, this is generally what happens. You never forget. You certainly needed the time off work after Jason passed away, then the trial, now perhaps as you say, you're ready to go back to work, channeling your energy into something that you yourself love to do.
I'm so happy that you and Miranda had a lovely Mother's Day together, I know it must be so painful for her also, she lost a beloved brother, and sometimes in our own grief we forget about our other children being in their own grief.
Yes, I know that Shane loved his balloons, it felt very peaceful to do it, and it was a beautiful sunset to do it in.
Oh, I would love to meet you one day Barb, whenever you're in my neck of the woods, I'm not sure where you live, but we're only a half hour from the New York Border. God bless you and your family, Barb, and know that I love you and keep you and your's in my prayers,
Luv Sandy

 
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