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Shane Whalen
This Prayer Circle is Dedicated to my son Shane Whalen Who Passed Away On March 15, 1999 at the Age of 24, & All Other Children


Start a prayer circle for bereaved parents who have lost a child.


There are many of us out there who have lost a child, and it is devastating. It changes the outlook on life, plunges you into a depression, and you think that the feelings and thoughts you have nobody else could possibly relate to. I think a prayer circle for bereaved parents would only benefit us and help us on our journey of grief. This Circle is one of Love, where a Grieving Parent can safely come to for Prayers, and to talk about their feelings.

 
Shaner -10/14/2000
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jpot
6/2/2007 21:53

Dear Charlene,
Thank you so much. I am trying to spend extra time listening to the Lord. One message I keep getting is to get to bed earlier. I slept until 11:30 today, did wake up a few times but fell back to sleep. Didn't do much except shop for food with Mike. Then I fixed us dinner. I'm still pretty exhausted and my stomach is not back to normal. I will be calling my doctor on Monday. Today I finish the antibotics. I know that the Lord allows suffering for a reason. At this point I just want to know the reason, but I know I may never really know. What I do know is that suffering of any kind, if allowed will build character, compassion and draw us nearer to God. I believe that is what keeps me going bout after bout. Thank you for your love and concern. Love, Jane


jpot
6/2/2007 22:12

Dear Charlene,
Thank you so much. I am trying to spend extra time listening to the Lord. One message I keep getting is to get to bed earlier. I slept until 11:30 today, did wake up a few times but fell back to sleep. Didn't do much except shop for food with Mike. Then I fixed us dinner. I'm still pretty exhausted and my stomach is not back to normal. I will be calling my doctor on Monday. Today I finish the antibotics. I know that the Lord allows suffering for a reason. At this point I just want to know the reason, but I know I may never really know. What I do know is that suffering of any kind, if allowed will build character, compassion and draw us nearer to God. I believe that is what keeps me going bout after bout. Thank you for your love and concern. Love, Jane


Shaner
6/3/2007 10:30

Hi dear Kathy,
Straddling the fence - I know what you mean, God love you. Its a delicate balancing act some days, isn't it! I know you're still in deep pain, please keep talking about it, never, ever get tired of hearing about it, remember that!! Yes indeed, you have this soft place to fall and you always will.
I pray your little 8 yr. old had a very nice Birthday!
p.s. I talk with my Shane (God's Shane) every day, just as you do with your Wes, :)
Much love & Hugs,
Sandy


Shaner
6/3/2007 10:40

Dear vicir and Pat,
I join in with the rest of the AngelMoms and Grandmas who have posted so wiseley and prayerfully for you both - your friend especially Pat.
VICIR, you will always be a Mom to your baby and one day you will see your precious Joshua again, love is stronger than death and can never be broken!
PAT, the same to your friend, she and her daughter have an everlasting bond of love together. YES, I hope your friend will be up to posting here when she's ready, never any pressure,
Love & Hugs,
Sandy


Shaner
6/3/2007 10:48

To All,
Our dear Selva asked me to post for her, she and Nancy have gone to the Dominican Republic (left early this am) for a week's Holiday. She also asked me to post that all of you are still daily in her prayers.
I think I speak for all that she and Nancy have a wonderful vacation, good weather and safe travel!
Love, prayers & Hugs,
Sandy


havelost4
6/3/2007 11:16

YES! Sandy, thank you for posting for Selva. SELVA, may God give you safe travel--blue skies and calm weather--peace and rest--also a wonderful time of visiting and sharing with your sister. A vacation sounds wonderful and I hope and pray that you enjoy it to the fullest.
Love and (((HUGS))),
Charlene


jpot
6/3/2007 23:55

Hi Everyone,

I see that I double posted last night. Not sure how that happen, but oh well like you say double the blessing! Just wanted to drop in and say today has been one of my better days. Went to church and afterwards received intensive prayer ministry. Came home and had a late breakfast with Mike. We talked a lot, did the dishes and went our way. I spoke to my sister in TN then took a 2 hr nap. Hardly do that any more, but woke up refreshed and have little to no pain! Today it just feels good to have some type of normal life again. Thank you for your prayers. I do pray the Selva and Nancy have a wonderful, restful holiday. Love and gratitude to all, Jane


jhdanner
6/4/2007 01:26



This letter comes with all my love

To comfort you today ~

For I know that you've been grieving

Since I was called away.



You've been so brave, so strong

Throughout this time of testing ~

This letter comes to reassure

That in Heaven I am resting.



I've asked the Lord to strengthen you

To dry your tears of pain ~

I pray as you read this letter

Somehow it will explain.



You see my flesh is just the envelope

Placed gently 'neath earth's sod ~

The Treasure Is The Letter

Safe in the arms of God !



Enjoying Heaven's bright glory

Rejoicing with loved ones here ~

With a brand~new glorified body

To feel ne'er again sickness nor fear.



So, dear one, please be comforted

Knowing I couldn't be doing better ~

Remember ~

I shall live forever because

THE TREASURE IS THE LETTER !!!



Mary Carter Mizrany

June 12, 2002
Copyrighted. All rights reserved.
Dedicated to all who are grieving over
The death of a loved one.


jhdanner
6/4/2007 01:59

Hello to all my dear friends and to all of you who have started posting since my last visit. I have been very busy and when I am on line spend little time doing anything other than reading a few emails and forwarding a few. Sandy and Verna, I am sorry that I havent ben here, I know the two of you have both kept in touch with me and continue to send me emails which always make me smile.
I want you all to know that I do think of this prayer circle often and pray for you all. I just work alot and 2 jobs at that. Sandy, I have been working 2 jobs now for a long time, havent I???? LOL...... Maybe one day all that will come to a stop. But back when I first found this circle a very dear friend who will remain nameless but they know who they are seen it in there heart to help me out in a tight spot. God blessed me with there love and compassion and my family and I were struggling so bad. I was so down and depressed and just knew I was going to lose everything I had so once I got back on my meds for depression and ws thinking clearly, I knew it was time to turn things around and one of those things was to start working two jobs to keep my family going. I have been doing this ever since. Verna and Sandy you two were there for me through it al, THANKS SO MUCH.
I know there are some of you here who do not know me because I dont post often but this is a wonderful place to be with so many loveing and careing people to turn to in time of pain and grief. It dose not matter how long I am gone I know my sisters are always praying for me and if I need them they are still here for me. What a great feeling.
I would like to let you all know I have done something this year I havent done in a very long time. I went to Amiee's grave. In fact I have been 3 times so far this year. Some of you will remember that I just couldnt bring myself to going to her grave. Up until this year it has been about 5 or 6 years since I have been there. On one of my visits I finally took my two boys and neither one of them have ever been there. They have always known about Amiee but I just have never taken them . Then on another trip out there I took Elizabeth with me( for the ones of you who do not know Amiee is Elizabeth's twin sister who ws killed by the babysitter when she ws 5 months old). Elizabeth and I had a much needed bonding time together. It was sad but at the same time it ws something tht we have needed to do for sometime now. She will be 15 this year and understands things so much more than I give her credit for. She is such a beautiful young women an doh my what would I do if Amiee was still here. I would have my hands full. The boys are already keeping the phone ringing all the time. If Amiee was still here I think I would be crazy by now but it would be fun to see what it would be like with them both still here. I still cant help but wonder if they would try to fool there teachers and friends.
Well, I feel like i have moved ahead alittle with my 3 visits and I am planning on going back in July when I take a week off from one of my jobs and I am going to have her tomb stone pressure washed. It is marble and looks terriable. I wish I could of been able to go there before now, maybe it wouldnt be so dirty.
Well, I have talked long enough. Love to everyone and I will try to post again as soon as I can.

Love and Butterfly Hugs,
Jennifer


havelost4
6/4/2007 10:53

JENNIFER!
It's really good to hear from you; I often wonder if those who used to post are even reading the posts here now. I'm sorry your life is so busy and hectic; but it sounds like you are a very conscientious mother--about making sure your kids are well taken care of. I admire you for doing what you have to do to take care of them and make sure they have what they need. I hope your health is good now; and I'm so proud of you for going to Aimee's gravesite and taking your other kids there too. Yes, I remember that your Elizabeth and Aimee were born the same year as Casey. She would have been 15 in January. That would definitely have been an interesting age. :o)
I'm glad you posted and updated us on your life! I hope you post again soon.
Love and (((HUGS))),
Charlene


havelost4
6/4/2007 12:07

JENNIFER,
Thank you for the poem; it was very good! True, the letter (the true person--what's inside them) is what is most precious and remembered, not the body (the envelope). It's hard for us 'mortals' to separate the two, even though that's the reality of eternal life. Those 'letters' are waiting for us in Heaven; I can't wait!
Love and (((HUGS))),
Charlene


jpot
6/5/2007 09:38

Hi Everyone,

Good morning to all. Have a quick prayer request. For all who know Cathy Kelly, she's mainly on the grief discussion boards, she's in the hospital. She had a stroke on Sunday. I understanding it took some coaching on part of a B'net member to make her go. Right now she is being evauluated to see what damage has been done. Please pray for a total healing. For those who know her she is a precious sister and friend. As for me I see the Dr on Thur, He will decide if I go to the hospital then. Healthwise, I'm about the same, but hanging in. Love and gratitude to all, Jane


KPETERSEN
6/5/2007 14:55

Selva,
My prayers as well for your wonderful holiday. May God bless you and Nancy with good weather, good times and lots of smiles :)


KPETERSEN
6/5/2007 14:58

Sandy,
Thank you, David (my little boy) had a great birthday party. Family and friends at the pizza place. It was a good day! I talk to Wes all the time. Sometimes it is like he actually is sitting next to me in the car when I drive home from work. I like that. I miss him so much. I can still hear his laugh. I hope I never loose that! Thanks again for your prayers!
Kathy


sja
6/5/2007 17:57

Thank you all for your posts and prayers about me getting a sign that daryl is at peace with God. Nothing concrete yet--but I do believe he is. I guess I just have some nagging doubts about his accident--did he do this to himself. He was going very fast on his motorcycle and ran into the back of an eighteen wheeler. His cell phone shows me he had plans to go somewhere, it's just that he was in a bad place with jobs and relationships. For years he talked of suicide, but he was very dramatic, and no one took him seriously (including several counselors that he went to for brief periods) He even told me several weeks before his accident that he was going to die young, but when I asked why he thought that he said it was because of all the risks he takes (on his bike.) Part of me thinks what difference does it make--he is gone. The hows and whys don't matter now. I haven't brought myself to read the police report yet, just the death certificate that indicates blunt force trauma to the head. Anyway, it nags at me a bit.

Tomorrow I am meeting with a local woman whose son died a week before daryl. She is a single mom and this was her only child. She has no support group, and was given my name by a mutual acquaintance. She tried compassionate friends, but ended up yelling at them and thus does not want to go back (like they never heard yelling before!) Anyway, talking and listening to others who grieve does get me down, but somehow also strengthens me.


Shaner
6/5/2007 19:36

Hi dear Kathy,
That's terrific, I'm so glad David had a happy and nice Birthday, a good day for all, yourself included I pray! (even if it was just for a while). Yum, Pizza, I haven't had that since last week :). Keep talking to your Wes, our children can hear our heart and who know's, he just may be sitting next to you in the car,
Much love & Hugs,
Sandy


Shaner
6/5/2007 19:40

A quick post too - I'll be back, I have to go out right now but I will come back later and get caught up.
Much love to all!
Sandy


mywings
6/6/2007 12:06

My husbands cousin took his own life in October of this past year. He left behind 5 beutiful children who have now been placed in seperate homes pending a year for their mother to get them back. Billy would have been 50 today and his mother and children are all in need of prayer God has a plan for everyone and I know the plan for this family has yet to show itself due to the need for healing amongst one another. Pray for the healing to begin and the feeling of loss and anger to heal.


Shaner
6/6/2007 13:35

I finally made it back! I'm so sorry, the Boards I Moderate were extremely busy and that's my sad excuse.
JENNIFER!!
Hey my friend, wonderful to see a Post from you again stranger! It's long overdue, but I realize working 2 jobs, looking after the kids and being a wife is more than a full-time job! I'm so happy for you that you're feeling better and hopefully, one of these days, you'll be down to 1 job. It take's so much money today to raise a family, keep food on the table, the mortgage paid and all the other necessities, as well as having some fun too!
That's a big breakthrough for you Jennifer, to finally be able to go to your precious Aimee's Grave site, after all these years. That must have been nice to take the boys, but especially Elizabeth, spending time with you at her twin sister's site. I know it must have had it's sad moments, but its wonderful to hear that you and she bonded so much while you both were there, :). I can just imagine the phone ringing for her, she's at that age, but I bet any young man would have to pass the 'Dad' test first, :).
It's really terrific to hear from you FINALLY, now don't be a stranger any more around here, check-in at least once in a while! YES, beautiful poem,
Much love & Hugs,
Sandy


Shaner
6/6/2007 13:51

Hi dear Jane, that's too bad about your friend Cathy on the Boards. God bless the B'net friend who talked her into going to hospital! I don't know her, but from what you describe, she sound's like a lovely person. I haven't had a chance to visit the other Boards in a while now, but I do pray that Our Lord heal's her with His Divine touch and no lasting affects.
The very same to you too, how are you feeling? Do you still think you may be hospitalized tomorrow? Please let us know,
Much love & Hugs,
Sandy


KPETERSEN
6/6/2007 13:58

PRAYER FOR ALL
Dear God,
May all the tears we cry and all the tears we have not cried but hold within, pour forth into your hands. please take each painful thought and unhealed wound, and send angels here to us. We long for peace.
Amen


Shaner
6/6/2007 14:54

Hello sja,
Good to hear from you again! Don't worry about your sign from Daryl, you'll receive it when you're least expecting it.
Doesn't sound like a suicide to me sweetie, if his cell phone showed he had plans for that evening. We have to get rid of the stigma of suicide, sometimes people, even young one's, are so depressed or suffer from another form of mental illness that they lose all hope and see suicide as their only choice while they're in that state. I'm speaking collectively here, not necessarily about Daryl. We're getting better about it, but we still have a way to go to understand it more and be far more compassionate towards those who are suffering from a mental illness. OK, stepping off my box now.
That's so nice of you to go and visit the Mom who lost her only child, it's so hard when you have no support - Compassionate Friends is a wonderful Organization and they would certainly never judge her if she yelled at anyone, she certainly doesn't have to be embarrased about going back, she need's that support right now and you're right, you just may not be in a good enough place yourself right now to help her on an ongoing basis. Would she consider joining this Circle? You know we'd love it if she posted here. Please take care of yourself and post here anytime,
Much love & Hugs,
Sandy


jpot
6/6/2007 23:07

Hi Everyone,

Cathy came home from the hospital today. It will take her time to recover fully both physically and emotionally. She was not treated kindly at the hospital.

As for me, I have good and bad days. I'm pretty sure he'll put me in tomorrow. If you don't see a post from me tomorrow night, it means I'm in. Right now I'm so exhausted from pushing myself so much. I wish I could say I would get rest there, but I know differently. I'm just praying they find the source of all the pain and know how to treat it.

Mywings, your husband's cousin's family is in my prayers, that must be one tough situation for all involved.

Sandy, what you posted about depression is so true. In my mind for many years death was the only solution out of all my pain. Thank God he saved my life. During that time someone told me I really didn't want to die, but to die to that life. By the Grace and Mercy of my Loving Heavenly Father, I did die to that life. My "new" life is so full of potential and life, the thoughts of suicide hasn't entered my mind in over 5 yrs. But I still remember what it felt like, total hopelessness and helplessness. When there is no hope or help in sight many people choose to give up because they see no way out.

SJA, I pray the meeting you had today wasn't too draining on you. When my daughter died, I had a close friend whose child also died around the same time. It really helped to have someone who really understood. I agree with Sandy, try to get her to post here. She'll be accepted and loved.

Kathy, thank you for that prayer. It meant a lot to me right now.

Love and gratitude to all, Jane


browneyes90403
6/7/2007 13:04

I pray for Shane and his family in their time of loss. I send healing and love...

 
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