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Shane Whalen
This Prayer Circle is Dedicated to my son Shane Whalen Who Passed Away On March 15, 1999 at the Age of 24, & All Other Children


Start a prayer circle for bereaved parents who have lost a child.


There are many of us out there who have lost a child, and it is devastating. It changes the outlook on life, plunges you into a depression, and you think that the feelings and thoughts you have nobody else could possibly relate to. I think a prayer circle for bereaved parents would only benefit us and help us on our journey of grief. This Circle is one of Love, where a Grieving Parent can safely come to for Prayers, and to talk about their feelings.

 
Shaner -10/14/2000
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selvam
5/29/2007 11:55

My dear dear sister. First of all, please forgive me for not posting to you yesterday, I just couldn't get in line but my prayers were there for you , I know how hard special days are on all of us, this is a very complicated pain and it will never go away, I pray for some comfort in knowing that Shane is together with all of our dear Angel kids, I am sure they had a birthday party for him. May God allow him to whisper in your ears how much he loves you. My love and prayers are always with you. Selva


lask
5/29/2007 13:27

SJA Sorry to hear about your lost. I lost my 23 year old son in November 0f 2005.Please come with any thing you want that is why we are all here to help each other.
KATHY I know how you feel . I like to talk about my son too but everyone either changes the subject or is afraid to say anything. I guess they are afraid to upset me. I can do that all on my own. Just some stupid little thing and I start crying just as I thought I was handling it better.
Hope everyone is doing fine since I haven't been here in awhile. I think about you all evert day and pray for all.
Lee Ann


Shaner
5/30/2007 10:26

Aw, thank you my dear sisters, Miss V and Selva, gosh, that was the first time in a while that I've had such a painful day and I'm happy its over with, as I said, I don't know why it hit me so hard this year, but it did and I just had to go with it, feel the pain, let it out by posting at our safe haven. What a blessing you all are, this is a soft place to fall when you're hurting.
Thank you all for your heartfelt prayers,
Much love & Hugs,
Sandy


Shaner
5/30/2007 10:31

Dear Jane, I truly hope you're feeling much better, if not, please go to the ER, the long weekend is over now and you'll get the tests, etc., that may be required.
No, I definitely don't know everything, ha, ha, but I did see that someone answered your question on the HTML Topic!
Much love & Hugs,
Sandy


KPETERSEN
5/30/2007 10:38

Dear Sandy,

I am glad to see that you made it through....although sad that you had such pain this time. This grief just does not make sense sometimes does it? You are right though, we must just go with it. We must learn something from these days of pain. Something deep that we don't understand I think. I don't know but I am happy you are out the other side :)

Jane, I pray you are feeling better. I wish that you would go to the emergency room and get relief from your pain. I will keep you in my prayers.

Lee Ann, You also are in my prayers. It is so hard sometimes isn't it? I just feel so alone not being able to talk through this with even friends. This circle is the only place I can go and I am soooo thankful for this. Still, it seems like you should be able to talk to your family or someone close and it just isn't possible without those awkward moments when no one looks at you or they change the subject. Sometimes it makes me just down right mad! Oh well, I am with you sister. We can talk to each other and WE will understand!

Love to all,
Kathy


Shaner
5/30/2007 10:39

A little
GIFT for all!

Love to you all,
Sandy


havelost4
5/30/2007 10:59

SANDY,
Thank you for the GIFT! I recognize it. :o)
How amazing is it that when we shed tears for each other, our pain is lessened just a tiny bit? God knew each one of us that would come here to this healing circle and be helped. And where would we be without Him? I know I would be doomed and hopeless. May He bless you Sandy with abundant peace today. Thank you!
Love and (((HUGS))),
Charlene


Shaner
5/30/2007 14:17

Yes, dear Kathy, thank you, I did make it through and the sun came back out again, Praise God! Everyone's prayers helped so much otherwise I just may still be going through it. I agree, sometimes it doesn't make sense and it's such a complicated grief, only us who've expe4rienced it can truly understand. So thankfully we have each other here :).
How are you doing lately? At least I've arrived at the point where I can live with it most of the time, but I certainly couldn't at the beginning, and that's where you are now. So please let us know, we care. And you and Lee Ann will always have that soft place to fall here too, you know that by now,
Much love & Hugs,
Sandy


Shaner
5/30/2007 14:25

Hi dear Charlene, you've seen it before? I thought it was perfect for this Circle, you're right, reaching out to each other in our pain really does help us with our own. YES, praise and thanksgiving to God, without Him beside us, none of us would make it through!
Much love & {{Hugs}} to you,
Sandy


smile713
5/30/2007 22:36

Amen I wouldn't want to live without GOD by my side! Speaking of God and this wonderful site, I have an update on my friends son. He has been sited and he picked up his last paycheck on Friday so he is alive. He still needs many prayers that will get him away from those drugs and get the help he needs. These are good people and their son is in the devils hands and If we don't give up and we stick together we can over power him. God please help get Michael back to his family. Please take away the pain that we have both physically and emotionaly. Amen


jpot
5/31/2007 01:37

Hi Everyone,
I hope this is a quickie cuz I'm sooo tired. Thank you Sandy for that gift, I don't have audio but the pic and words were beautiful. I'm glad your day is over and you're feeling better. Chris, I think I missed something. What happened to your friend's son?

Tomorrow I go to the doc again. Today my stomach wasn't bad at all, which is really weird cuz I had three donuts. I hardly ever eat them, but they were free along with coffee to all who came in early for inventory. I really didn't think I had a choice. I would have chosen sleep over donuts! Anyway, after a very long day I went to a friend's house for dinner and a discussion about my finances. Can't say I agree with all he wants me to do, but then I'm so tired, it will take till the weekend to really look at his ideas. Kathy, it's great to see you posting more also. Lee Ann, keep hanging in. Really need some sleep, tomorrow will also be a very hard day at work. Love and gratitude to all, Jane


smile713
5/31/2007 10:34

Jane, a re-post. I also need prayers again for my best friend (remember Steve?) his brother is into drugs heavely, when he did not acknowlege mothers day, My friend became worried and went to check on him. All they found was a suicide note and he has been missing since Sun 5/20. Please ask that he is alive and that he gets the help he needs to concor his addiction.

He is alive but does not keep in contact with anyone but drug people. Prayer seems to be the only thing that will help right now untill he wants the help to get into rehab. He is a hansome boy and I will not give up on him. Thanks Chris


vicir
5/31/2007 17:21

I as well can share in your grief,I recently lost my son Joshua to a premature birth.I never even got to hear him cry.I delivered at home at 6 months and held him in my arms till the Lord took him into his kingdom.I think about him every day,and my heart goes out to anyone who has had to bury their child and live every day for the ones left.Sometimes I feel I cannot even gather the strength to get out of bed,but I have 4 other children that need me as well.And I go on because I know that one day we will all be together again.


jpot
6/1/2007 01:23

Hi All,
Another quickie, cuz of my incredible schedule again. Thank you Chris for the repost, I do remember now. I will keep him in my prayers. Sorry, lately when I finally get online, my mind blanks out.

Dear Vivir, I'm so sorry for your loss. Please feel free to post here often. You will find a family that truly understands what you are going through. I also know what it's like to lose young baby and have to keep up with a family. Those were so awful tough times. My loss was a very long time ago, but the sadness still comes, when I least expect it. We call it the grief journey (also known as the roller coaster). It won't always be this awful, but there will always be a feeling of missing a loved one. You and your family are in my prayers. Please post often and welcome to our unique family. Our welcome is genuine, however filled with sorrow cuz we know why your here. Love, Jane


havelost4
6/1/2007 10:05

Dearest vicir,
I am 'grandma' here because I've not lost children of my own, but 4 grandchildren. One of those was a grandson who was stillborn at 6 months. That was 18 years ago and I didn't grieve for him until I lost 2 granddaughters in a car wreck 2 1/2 years ago. I didn't even hold him (that's another story) and I regret it now. His mother (our daughter) has since had 6 healthy babies and they are all still fine and healthy, the oldest almost 16. What I'm trying to say is that I feel your pain and I'm praying for you. Yes, keep loving and taking care of your other children, but be sure to set aside 'me' time for you to express your grief. Don't hold it in because it will hurt you physically as well as emotionally. And don't listen to those who say 'it's God's will' because obviously they haven't lost a baby or a child when they say that; or else they just don't understand and have never allowed themselves to grieve either. I'm hurting for you and praying for you.
Love and (((HUGS))),
Grandma Charlene
Baby boy: 2-25-89 (adopted 3-89)
Michael: 3-27-89 (stillborn)
Casey Marie: 1-7-92 to 12-1-04 (car wreck)
Carey Grace: 3-18-94 to 12-1-04 (car wreck)


havelost4
6/1/2007 10:10

Hi CHRIS,
I'm glad that Michael is still alive, even though he's messed up. God can still change him as long as he's alive. Drugs are such a stronghold in this world and I pray that that stronghold be broken in Jesus' name. It will definitely require him to make the decision; it's so awfully hard to stand back (even while praying) and let the 'messed up' person make their own decision to get help. I hope that your son is doing okay. Let us know.
Love and (((HUGS))),
Charlene


KPETERSEN
6/1/2007 11:16

Dear Vicir,
My prayers are with you and I am sorry about your precious baby Joshua. I lost my son in Aug. 2005. He was 23. I also have other children and have often not wanted to get out of bed but I am so thankful for reasons to rise and great each new day with God by my side. Please let us know how you are doing, we all know your pain and would love to help you heal. God bless you.
Kathy


KPETERSEN
6/1/2007 11:39

Dear Sandy,
That "Gift" is beautiful! It is perfect for our circle. Thank you for asking how I am doing. To tell the truth I am straddling the fence a little. It is quite a balancing act sometimes but for the most part I am doing fine. I talked with Wes for quite awhile yesterday and cried a little. It does make me feel better to get it out...still hurts terribly. I am VERY thankful for this soft spot to land!

CHARLENE,
I agree with you about shedding tears and grieving not just for ourselves but for each other helps so much. God has truly led us all here to help each other and we are very blessed indeed!

CHRIS,
That is good news about Michael. I will be praying for God to work in his life. It is very hard to stand on the sidelines but prayer is magical and faith will see us through.

JANE,
I am so happy you are feeling a little better. I have been praying! I pray you are better everyday. Please take care and take it slow!

Sisters, have a wonderful weekend. It is my little boy's birthday on Monday and we have a party planned for tomorrow. He turns 8 years old and I just don't know where the time has gone! I had a little Heavenly message from someone whispering in my ear that I need to see and be thankful for the beauty in all around me so I don't miss anything and be thankful for the time at hand. Good message.
Love to all
Kathy



nursingcops7
6/1/2007 12:22

First let me say my prayers and sympathy are extended to all of you who have lost a child. What a terrible tradgedy to live through. It just seems against nature for a child to go before a parent. I pray for you all to be able to realize that your child is with GOD/HEAVEN and there is no better place to be and that someday you all will be able to SMILE once again and live through there memories.
My heart is heavy as I write this, as like you my friend Sue lost her beautiful daughter Kaitlyn just this March. Her funeral was Apri 1st 2007.
Kaitlyn was 14 a wonderful girl. Wanted to be a doctor. She donated 4 of her organs and because of that a man who never in his life saw before can now see, plus someone has a kidney and will live because of Kaitlyn. GOD LOVE her. Kaitlyn had low self-esteem and one of her wishes was to be a cheerleader she tried out 2 years in a row and finally this year made the team.
Kaitlyn was walking to her cheerleading practice and in a cross walk, when an 84 yr.old driver went right thru the stop sign, did not even slow down and hit Kaitlyn. Kaitlyn survived for 2 days but on life support, then unfortunately she died. My friend Sue is a single mom and Kaitlyn was her LIFE! How sad. I pray for the 84 yr. old man that hit her; I know that he did not get up in the morning and say I am going to hit and kill a child today.
So my prayers go out to both he and Sue.
May Sue find the strength to carry on.
God Bless you all.

Pat


KPETERSEN
6/1/2007 12:38

Dear Pat,
What a terrible tragedy. My prayers go out to all involved. What a wonderful girl Kaitlyn is. She gave the gift of God. My son also donated his organs so others could go on. I will be praying for Sue. Please tell her about us. We will all be here for her, you and Kaitlyn. ALL of our prayers go straight to Heaven. God bless you,
Kathy


havelost4
6/1/2007 13:52

Dear PAT,
I'm glad you posted here; your friend Sue will definitely get our prayers! What a tragedy to lose a 14 year old daughter. I also pray for the 19 year old girl (now 21 or 22) who hit our daughter's car broadside, killing our 2 granddaughters (ages 10 and 12). The oldest, Casey, was in 7th grade and wasn't a popular girl in school--shy and awkward--but she tried out for cheerleader that year and made it! Some of the other girls who were like her made cheerleader too since all the 'jocks' were in sports and didn't try out for cheerleader. She was the happiest that I had ever seen her, just 3 months before the car wreck that took her and her sister to Heaven. My prayers are with you too as you continue to be a very dear friend to Sue; she needs someone right now who will sit beside her and let her cry, scream, be quiet--whatever she needs to do. Life will go on around her but for her, life has stopped for a while. It will go on for her too later, but right now she needs rest and someone she can be 'real' with. Stand by/with her and let her grieve. She needs you. :o)
Thank you for posting.
Love and (((HUGS))),
Charlene


jpot
6/1/2007 22:05

Hi Family,
WOW, lots happening again. Vicir, I totally agree with Charlene. Being a busy mom you have no choice but to care the best you can for them. However, you do need "me" time just to process the grief. Allow time to cry because if you don't it will come out later. That was my experience, partly because of something else Charlene stated. Don't believe it was God's will. Yes, He is in control and did allow it, but it wasn't his will. There are reasons sometimes known only to Him why He allows such tragedy to enter into our lives. I know it is so hard now to understand but there is a big difference between God's will and what He allows. He will work this tragedy for good, however we may never really see it.

Pat, I would stongly recommend that you introduce Sue to our circle. There are also other sites on b'net that deal with the death of a child. She is surely in my prayers. Love, Jane


jpot
6/1/2007 22:24

It's me again,

My health is a big issue again. I know I walk a fine line between pushing myself not to give in too quickly and crossing the line that I've pushed too hard. This week I know I crossed that line. Today at work, I had to take a break just to talk to a friend for her advise as to whether I should go to the hospital. We have been very short staffed due to inventory and I have worked my dept all week by myself. Today, I was so exhausted I was shaking and thought I was going to faint. My stomach is also acting up. Before my break I told the manager on duty that I was very sick and since I was alone, really needed to be checked on. My employer does know I do push too hard, and I have had to be brought out by paramedics. I was able to finish the day but I am so exhausted and in such pain. Being single I can't take many days off for illness. I'm really praying and value your prayers that my body will recoup in the next 3 days. If it doesn't I have no choice but to go back to the doctor (the promise was I had to be completely better in 10 days). I know he will put me in the hospital. I'm trying real hard not to allow fear to enter in, however that is extremely difficult lately. I am so tired of being sick. There are around 4 people in my church that are constantly sick and end in the hospital. We seem to take turns. I really want out of that group! I really don't believe it's God's will for life to be this hard. I just don't know how to break out of the sickness cycle. Anyway, I'm rambling. Please just keep me in your prayers that I make some wise decisions healthwise. Love and gratitude, Jane


havelost4
6/2/2007 21:27

JANE,
I'm sorry I didn't post before now, but I've been praying anyway. I've been outside working in the flower beds again and counting my blessings that I feel like doing something again. I've been praying that God would show you beyond a shadow of a doubt what you are to do, that He would give you peaceful rest this weekend, and that your body would heal. 'Not my will but Thine be done' has been going through my mind--sometimes He takes us through hard times (allows them) for reasons that we don't understand. I'm praying that you will be open to Him and what He is telling you. Spend this time communing with Him and getting closer to Him; He'll show you what to do to get better. :o)
Love and (((HUGS))),
Charlene

 
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