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Shane Whalen
This Prayer Circle is Dedicated to my son Shane Whalen Who Passed Away On March 15, 1999 at the Age of 24, & All Other Children


Start a prayer circle for bereaved parents who have lost a child.


There are many of us out there who have lost a child, and it is devastating. It changes the outlook on life, plunges you into a depression, and you think that the feelings and thoughts you have nobody else could possibly relate to. I think a prayer circle for bereaved parents would only benefit us and help us on our journey of grief. This Circle is one of Love, where a Grieving Parent can safely come to for Prayers, and to talk about their feelings.

 
Shaner -10/14/2000
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jpot
5/24/2007 14:51

Hi All,

I find myself in need of real prayer warriors again. I am almost immoblized by feeling so ill. I don't know if I'm under some kind of attack, cuz I'm very involved in a 10 day prayer session, leading up to Penecost. Many wonderful things have happened so far, but each night it is more difficult to get there, because I feel so rotten physically. I am really tired of being so sick! I appreciate everyone's prayers. Love and gratitude, Jane


KPETERSEN
5/24/2007 16:00

Dear Jane,
I am praying that God heal you from your illness right away. I am sorry you are so sick. I am sure you are tired of it. I wish there was something else I could do but pray for you, but that is the best medicine I can offer. Rest Jane, try to stay in bed and get well. The world will wait. You will be feeling better soon :)
Love,
Kathy


selvam
5/24/2007 16:20

Dear Joyce. I also want to welcome you to our Circle of Love, I am sorry that we have to meet this way. God has taken you to the right place, here you will find lots of love, prayers, understanding and support, we all know the horrible pain of losing a child, I lost my only child Solange at age 20 to a car accident Aug 15, 2002. We understand the whys, the anger, guilt and all that comes with this complicated pain. I have received signs from my daughter, and you will too, I think the frogs were a sign from your son, all you have to do is be aware of little things and the signs will come. I get feathers sometimes, this past Mother's Day I was sitting in my backyard talking to Solange and was telling her that I knew she could not give me a present that day but I knew I had her love nad she has mine etc I have a gardenia tree that when I came out didn't have a flower in it, when I turned around to go inside the house, I noticed this beautiful gardenia just where I had to go through, I knew right away that Solange had given me a beautiful flower for Mohter's Day, somehow you will feel it in your heart when it is a sign. I (we) will pray hard for you to get a sign from your son, I know how important that is.Please feel free to posts here anytime you wish, this is a very lonely road, and only the ones who have gone through this pain really understand. My love and prayers are with you. Selva


selvam
5/24/2007 16:25

Dear Jane. Of course we will storm Heaven with prayers for your health, please rest and be sure to contact your doctor if you keep feeling sick, there is some terrible virus going on around here, with high fever, aches and pain and terrible cold, please take care of yourself and like our dear sister Kathy says, the world can wait. My love and prayers to you all. Selva


jpot
5/24/2007 23:50

Hi Everyone,

Thank you for your prayers. I went in to get my allergy shot today and the nurse wouldn't let me leave until the doctor saw me. Funny thing is if I called for an appointment to come in, there wouldn't be one available. He wanted to put me in the hospital right away, but I begged him to wait a couple of days. I told him I had to be at church for Penecost Sunday, since I have been praying so much for it. There's a certain bacterial infection that hits the stomach. It starts with a py and when I hear it I can remember. I have had it before. I was recently tested for it and it was negative. He believes it was a false negative, that I really have it, because I have all the symptoms. He has me on medication for that, plus changed the antibotic for my sinus to one that would work both infections. He also said I was anemic but would address that until the infection cleared. It may clear itself, once I start to eat better. Tonight, I received a lot of prayer, but unfortunately still don't feel much better. The reason he wants to put me in the hospital is because he said the pain level was off the wall. Realistically, with it being Memorial Day weekend, I don't believe much testing would be done. And I know I sleep much better at home. I promised to call him Tuesday with my pain level. If it worsens, I have to go to ER, have them call the Dr and be admitted. Really don't want that to happen. So thank you everyone for your prayers. Love and gratitude, Jane


havelost4
5/25/2007 10:56

Dear sja,
I know about unanswered questions; some of them I believe I will never know the answers to, but that's okay. That's where trust and faith in God (who knows ALL the answers) comes in. When I choose to trust Him even though I don't have all the answers, it gives me such peace. I've had dreams of the girls but I don't think I've ever wanted a sign from them; I ask God to show me sometimes if I'm thinking right, doing the right thing, etc. and one time in particular stands out to me now. I was driving home from town about a year ago and was thinking about the girls and crying and praying that if God wanted to give me a sign, that He would do it. I was listening to a Christian gospel music radio station at the time and immediately an Elvis gospel song came on. It was "Jesus Knows Just What You Need". I started laughing then and crying too because I felt like God answered my prayer. (You see, Elvis was Carey's FAVORITE singer--we took her and her cousin to Graceland just a few months before the car wreck.) That radio station always says what the song is and who sings it after it has played; they didn't do that for that song. And I've never heard them play an Elvis song again. To me, that was definitely a sign from God that He heard my prayer for help from Him.
Keep looking to Him for your answers.
Love and (((HUGS))),
Charlene


havelost4
5/25/2007 11:03

CHRIS,
Only one thing to say; YOU DID GOOD!!! I was reading a devotion this morning about grief and the writer suggested that we shouldn't allow people to grieve 'quietly', but should keep trying to be friendly with them until they open up and share their grief with others. I don't know how I feel about that. I know that keeping the grief bottled up inside isn't good, but I'm also not the type of person to keep bugging someone if they don't feel like sharing with me. Maybe it all depends on how well you know the person to begin with; I wouldn't go up to a stranger and try to get them to open up to me without getting to know them first. That's just me. But I think you did a WONDERFUL thing by talking/sharing with that couple. They will remember you and how you helped them for a long time. May God bless you abundantly for what you did! :o)
Love and (((HUGS))),
Charlene


havelost4
5/25/2007 11:14

JANE,
My prayers are for you today; that God would bring you relief from your pain so that you could rest and be refreshed, and also that you would respond to the antibiotic in a dramatic way that would heal your body. Praying that you wouldn't have to go into the hospital but that you could rest at home.
Love and prayers and (((HUGS))),
Charlene


havelost4
5/25/2007 11:17

EVERYONE,
Remember Sandy Monday the 28th, as that is Shane's birthday. I didn't know how many would be gone or busy for the Memorial Day weekend we have here in the USA, so I wanted to remind you of that date today.
Love and (((HUGS))),
Charlene


KPETERSEN
5/25/2007 14:16

Dear Sandy,

You will be in my thoughts and prayers this weekend. I pray you are filled with God's love and peace. Please pamper yourself and take very good care. These special days are just terrible sometimes I know but I also know that God is right beside us helping us to make it through. I pray you find a smile somewhere along the way this weekend :)
Lots of love,
Kathy


Shaner
5/26/2007 14:31

Dear Jane,
I too pray the antibiotic does its 'magic' and you're feeling better. Make sure and take care of yourself!
Much love & Hugs,
Sandy


Shaner
5/26/2007 14:34

Aw, dear Charlene, that's so sweet of you to post that, that's right, this is a long weekend in the U.S., I had forgotten about that. Hope you all have a good one!
Much love & {{Hugs}}
Sandy


Shaner
5/26/2007 14:53

Hi dear Kathy,
Thank you sweetie for your post to me, I can surely use the prayers as Shane's Birthday approaches. Yes, I'm always grateful that our loving God is ever present for us, through the good times and the not so good,
Much love & Hugs,
Sandy


jpot
5/26/2007 23:12

Hi Everyone,

I am feeling much better, so thank you for all your prayers.

Sandy, you are very much in my prayers this weekend. I am taking everyone's advice and taking it easy this weekend. I was at a barbeque all today. For the most part the day was stormy. However, it let up enough to cook and eat outside, then started up again. Met a lot of new people and all were very friendly to me. Was gone for 12 hrs, but it went fast and was relaxing. Love and gratitude to all, Jane


havelost4
5/27/2007 15:15

TO ALL,
I just read this in a devotion about grief--
"I wished people would have just come and told me they loved me and that God loved me, and then helped me feed the dog, take care of the house, dump the garbage, do some things like that. Doing practical things for me would have been good because so many things they said were causing turmoil for me rather than comfort. So I learned that the words should be few and that it is better to do practical things to help the family. Bring some casseroles; feed the children; do the laundry."
I thought that was very good; something that I wouldn't have been able to put into words as well as she did.
I hope and pray that you all are having a restful and peaceful weekend.
Love and (((HUGS))),
Charlene


havelost4
5/27/2007 16:20

JANE,
I'm so glad you're taking it easy and having a good time this weekend. Hopefully that will improve your health dramatically. :o)

I had a busy day yesterday; my brother has a dog carrier so he went with me to take my new little dog to the vet for a checkup. We had a stray dog come here last week and he just adopted us; but he was covered with ticks so I took him to the vet to have him cleaned up, shots given, a general checkup. He's about 2 years old (that explains why he chews on everything!) and he's a long haired fox terrier. He's the same color as his picture in the encyclopedia, black and white. We're still trying to come up with a name for him.
Today my hubby and I got out early and started making the rounds to the cemeteries to put out flowers. Last year I started putting flowers on the grandparents' graves and I decided to do that again this year. Of course we have the girls' gravesite and the one grandson, then my dad and this year my hubby's mom. It took us about 5 hours by the time we made the stops in about 5 different cemeteries in a 30 mile radius. We also stopped at 2 other cemeteries where I had heard that I had family there; we found the gravesites of my greatgrandfather and greatgrandmother on my dad's side and my greatgrandmother's parents, which would by my great-greatgrandparents who were Mennonites who came from Pennsylvania. I'm not Mennonite, but that probably explains my fascination with their way of life and also of the Amish. Now I'm interested in looking through all my geneology records to read all about them again and how they settled in this part of the country (traveling by covered wagon) with their MANY relatives of the same name. Sorry to bore you all with my family history, but I get the 'bug' once in a while and like to review the stories of my ancestors. I still haven't located them all, but my sister has all the information and I'm sure she'd share it with me.
Enough rambling!
I pray you all are having a wonderfully peaceful and restful weekend!
Love and (((HUGS))),
Charlene


havelost4
5/28/2007 08:41

SANDY,
I pray that God would bless you today with happy memories of your Shane; that He would even cause you to chuckle at some of the fun times you remember about your boy. May your day today be filled with peace of heart and mind as you reminisce about past birthdays and Shane's life.
Much love and prayers for you today,
Charlene


jpot
5/28/2007 12:11

Dear Sandy,
First I say Amen to Charlene's post to you for today. Please know you are in my prayers today. May you find comfort in knowing that one day you will be reunited with Shane. In the meantime, try to hold on to those great memories of Shane. Do what you need to so that you don't go down that dark road that leads to despair. It's worth all of us remembering that it's because of Shane that we have this wonderful circle and family. So thank you Sandy you turned a tremendous tragedy into something so uplifting to others. Love and gratitude, Jane


havelost4
5/28/2007 17:01

JANE,
I'm so thankful that you're feeling better! Continue to take care of yourself and God will provide the way for you to get even better.
Love and (((HUGS))),
Charlene


Shaner
5/28/2007 20:10

Thank you my dear CHARLENE and JANE for your kind thoughts, beautiful prayers today, on Shane's Birthday. I've been very sad all day. Not in despair Jane, your prayers saved me from that, but just a deep sadness that's hard to explain. For some reason this year has hit me harder than the last two previous years, I don't know why. I just know that I miss Shane so, so much today, I can't even get any joy out of looking at his older Birthday pictures. Does it ever end? I'm going to bed early and sleep until this day is over, I'm mentally exhausted.
Love & Hugs to you both
Sandy


jpot
5/28/2007 23:16

Hi Everyone,

Sandy, I'm glad the day is over for you. I don't know why today was so much sadder. What I have discovered on this very long journey is that certain ages that our child would have been are harder. Since Elizabeth was so young, the first birthday, age 5, then when I saw the Kindergarden bus a few months later and on it goes. I remember when she would have been 13 I wrote a long letter to her. This year wasn't as sad as the last two, when my thoughts went to would she have been married, and children? To your question, "Does it ever end?" We all know it doesn't, just at times it is easier than at other times. Sometimes when we least expect it, a trigger will go off and the sadness will intensify. It will calm down again.

To all the prayer warriors, today has been awful as to my pain level. I know my doctor said to go to ER, but I really didn't see the point of it. Unless, it's life threatening, no tests or procedures would have been done today. So I stayed home, pretty much curled up, it helps the pain. I did help someone scan letters and send it to her e-mail cuz her scanner is broken. Seemed it took hours and I really thought I was going to scream in pain. Mike is making me eat, but not pushing how much. As long as I attempt to have a small meal he leaves me be. He is very concerned though. That's about all the energy I have for now. Love and gratitude, Jane


LOVE2U
5/29/2007 00:10

Hi dear Sandy, ~ you probably won't see this until tomorrow, but I just wanted to let you know that you have been in my prayers throughout this special day. I pray in the spirit a lot and today was one of those times. As you know I've been on my grief journey a little longer, and so far the deep sadness and longing to see my child hasn't ended. We can fill our hours, days, years doing and thinking about other things, but unfortunately, that deep sadness that you speak of can surface at any given time. A special day, a favorite song, the sound of their voice, or laughter; or even seeing someone that reminds us of our child. No, sadly, there is no getting beyond the sadness. What prayer does is make it a bit easier to live with. On special days, I usually try to sleep most of the day away if possible. For some reason it seems to help. Of course we know that God is watching over our children for us and that, if not here with us, they couldn't be in a better place. Nevertheless, that doesn't stop the pain of missing them. If it wasn't for my faith in our loving Father and God sending people to help me carry this heavy cross I know I would not have survived these many years after losing my precious Diane. Our God is faithful; of this I have no doubt. It is a combination of all of these things, and the “signs” I receive when in doubt that keeps me going. Therefore, as dear angel mom, Eva, so often expressed it … "I press on!"

Love & Prayers,
Verna [aka Miss V.]


LOVE2U
5/29/2007 00:18

I see that it IS tomorrow, so I guess I'll go try to get some rest. Jane, please know I am praying that God will ease your pain. I promise to try to check in more often as my condition improves a bit more. Thank you all for continuing to pray for me. It's been a pretty rough year but I am so grateful to still be here. :) All are in my prayers!
Love & Hugs,
Verna


LOVE2U
5/29/2007 00:23

Thanks again to [All]who sent me happy birthday wishes. Some I didn't see until the next day because I wasn't online much that day until late, late. But I did try to send thank you notes to each of you. :)

 
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