Prayer Circles

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Shane Whalen
This Prayer Circle is Dedicated to my son Shane Whalen Who Passed Away On March 15, 1999 at the Age of 24, & All Other Children

Start a prayer circle for bereaved parents who have lost a child.

There are many of us out there who have lost a child, and it is devastating. It changes the outlook on life, plunges you into a depression, and you think that the feelings and thoughts you have nobody else could possibly relate to. I think a prayer circle for bereaved parents would only benefit us and help us on our journey of grief. This Circle is one of Love, where a Grieving Parent can safely come to for Prayers, and to talk about their feelings.

Shaner -10/14/2000
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Read Prayers.

2/8/2002 17:14

Dear Plapfm,I am so glad a Priest came by and talked to you.God is there when we need him the most and he is going to help you work through your pain and anger.I thought that article was good.There is truly hope for you and your husband.Prayer is so powerful.So please keep praying,as i will keep praying for you.Love,Barb

2/8/2002 17:47

Dear Shaner,i wish we could put that poem by the front door.To try to make family and friends understand how we feel.I just cant understand why it makes people feel so uncomfortable to talk to us about it.Maybe thats just me.I like what you said about God,he is so AWESOME.Love,Barb

2/8/2002 17:57

Hi Love2u,I cant remember if i have already said this,but i read your post at Carols memorial site.Thank you so much.Its really great that you can write poetry.I know that has to give you an outlet.Thank God for that.Is it going to be published or is it for you and special people to enjoy?I was just wondering.It would be nice to read it.I wrote a couple of poems for Carol and had them put in our local newspaper.They are just poems from my heart,because i am surely not a writer.I am glad that you are doing better.I hope one day to have complete peace.God is helping me so and all you special people.God bless you.Love,Barb

2/8/2002 20:40

Hi Barb, yes, He is AWESOME!! He's seen us through the storm and blessed us in the process. He'll be there to walk with us throughout our life's journey, and then we'll see our beloved children again, Shane and Carol!
A friend of mine who posts here on and off sent me a wonderful forward, it said even more than the poem I posted, and it was right on the mark for us where other people are concerned. I told her it's too bad it wasn't made into a pamphlet or brochure to hand out at Churches, Funeral Homes, etc., when a parent has lost a child, for family and friends to read, then they would understand us better. I wish I still had it, I'd send it to you. But the poem itself says so much in it's short length, I agree wholeheartedly with you, it pains me greatly when family and friends don't even acknowledge our loss, or think we're over it by now, not realizing that it's something that we live with everyday and probably always will. The death of a child changes your life forever, it splits your life in two, the one you had with your child, and now the one you're dealing with without your child. I hear this so often from other moms who've lost a child, so you're not alone! I think people think if they ignore our loss, then we won't get sad, so they avoid the topic altogether, not realizing that they're causing us more hurt. That's why it's so nice to be able to share with another mom. Oh, I read your post to Love2U, we'd be so honoured if you'd post one of your wonderful poems about Carol here, it may help another mom to read it! I'd love to be able to read one of them!
Think about it, and I'd be so honoured if you did post one here. Blessings to you my dear sister,
Luv Sandy

2/9/2002 07:17

Marahet, hello! I just went over to post at Shane's memorial site and saw your posting there, I was very touched!
Thank you so much, you have a very kind heart!
Luv Sandy

2/9/2002 16:03

To the fam. of Shane Whalen my heart goes out to you and your family, I too lost my 21 year old son in an automobile accident. I love and miss my angel so much that is through the power of prayer and Gods will that I am still here. I still feel very fournate that God took my angel but I know where he is buried after the attack on the WTC we parents in grief thank the Lord ,we know where our children are buried. my prayers and thoughts are with those less fournate than us. I will lift you and your family in prayers so that the almighty continues to give you the strength he has given you and I.It's so
beautiful to share our thoughts and memories, to pray for each other. GOD BLEES YOU AND YOURS, the mother of the late NAKIA LEE RAMIREZ, veribest, tx

2/9/2002 16:07

To the fam. of Shane Whalen my heart goes out to you and your family, I too lost my 21 year old son in an automobile accident. I love and miss my angel so much that is through the power of prayer and Gods will that I am still here. I still feel very fournate that God took my angel but I know where he is buried after the attack on the WTC we parents in grief thank the Lord ,we know where our children are buried. my prayers and thoughts are with those less fournate than us. I will lift you and your family in prayers so that the almighty continues to give you the strength he has given you and I.It's so
beautiful to share our thoughts and memories, to pray for each other. GOD BLESS YOU AND YOURS, the mother of the late NAKIA LEE RAMIREZ, veribest, tx.

2/10/2002 08:55

Hello martharamirez, I'm so very sorry to read about your son, Nakia Lee. Yes, we all are very fortunate to have a site for our children, those parents who lost their child on 9/11 may not be as fortunate as we are, God bless them.
We here on these pages can relate to how you're feeling, the terrible pain and longing for your child, and yes, the power of prayer does wonderful things for us all! God knows of our pain and hurt, and He helps us and blesses us if we lean on Him. Thank you for your beautiful prayers, and our's go out to you as well, to keep you strong in your grief and in Our Lord. May God bless you and your family,
Luv Sandy

2/10/2002 18:01

I have found this site by accident, and have read each entry. My heart goes out to each and every one of you that has lost a child. I have two children and I thank the Lord for them everyday. My son had surgery when he was 5 weeks old, and that was the scariest time of my life. So many things crossed through my mind while he was in surgery.... I just want the mothers here to know how much this site means to people (even those who have not lost children themselves, but who have loved ones who have). I thank the Lord everyday for the blessings in my life. I can only imagine what the mothers go through during such a difficult time. Shaner, you and the other mothers that post here and offer advice to others going through such a difficult situation are an inspiration to everyone. That is what this world is all about. I pray that everyone who visits this site will experience the tremendous feeling of love and compassion that I felt while reading these posts.
To please a pregnancy for me: It took me and my husband 3 years (and 1 miscarriage) to give birth to our daughter who will be 3 on March 4, 2002. There were so many times that I also wondered why so many people were getting pregnant that really didn't care or want to. Finally, we quit thinking about it, made a three bedroom house a two bedroom, bought a boat, and a waterbed, and wouldn't you know 3 weeks later I found out I was pregnant! We were so much in debt, but we didn't care... We were so happy! And then, a year after our daughter was born we started thinking about having another child. My doctor said we should go off of the pill because it could take several months before we could get pregnant again. We did, and the very next month we found out we were expecting our second child!! I was floored! The power of prayer and family is so strong. Please know that I think of all of you daily and pray that you find comfort. I can only imagine what you go through, but please know that your site has touched me deeply and others who I have told about it. God bless you all.

Tammy Cooper

2/10/2002 18:42

Hi Tammy! I'm so honoured that you posted here, as will the other moms. I'm glad you found it, I don't believe in accidents, I feel God led you here for us! Your kind, warm, thoughts and prayers have warmed up many a heart here on these pages, myself included. You sound like you have a wonderful family, gosh, yes, you and your husband must have been so scared when your son had his surgery, but thank God, he is alright now. It touches my heart in a different way from our beloved moms here, when a mother or other person who hasn't experienced such a loss takes the time and effort to post here. You're a special person, and we really do appreciate your posting. YES, that is what the world is all about, helping or at least trying, to help others, in this particular Circle, parents who have lost a beloved child, or in some cases here, parents who've had more than one child pass away. Thank you for posting some good advice and hope to pleaselordapregnancyfor me, I know she'll appreciate it so much too! That's truly God's Hand at work in your life, giving you not just one, but two children after your miscarriage and the length of time you and your husband had to wait. He does work in His time, doesn't He! Thank you once again for posting here, we truly appreciate the fact that other moms think about us and pray for us, may God bless you and your family abundantly,
Luv Sandy

2/10/2002 22:19

I feel so honored that you responded to my post Shaner. I only hope that you realize what an impact you have on the people that read and respond to this site.
As I said before, I have not lost a living child, but I had a miscarriage before my first daughter was born.
My life was so empty and the future seemed so bleek. Even though I was an active member in my church and had so many family members that wanted to "rescue me", I could not find comfort.
I tried to lose myself in alcohol, cigarettes, and just staying out till all hours of the night. My husband was the best cheerleader of all time. He understood that I needed time to work through the problems in my own way. We went to counselling, but that seemed to help only him. Finally, after so many nights of being so drunk that I didn't even realize who I was, I understood what the Lord asked of me. My best friend of 15 years was devastated by the loss of her child (5 months before due date). I had no idea what to say or do to make her feel better. I could only be there for her and talk when she wanted to talk. After all this time, she still tells me that even though I am her best friend, talking with people that have gone through the same thing helps her more than being in similar situations.
I pray for all who have lost their children or loved ones. I can only imagine your pain. But, please know, that you are in my thoughts and prayers daily and this site has inspired me in ways you will never know.

Tammy Cooper

2/11/2002 07:28

Hi Sandy, thank you so much for your post and your words of encouragement. As you well know, the prayers we pray for others make our grief somewhat easier to bear. Having lost so many loved ones and friends over the years, sometimes I wonder how I have been able to make it this far. And, every time I do, I reach the same conclusion. It is
the power of prayer that helps each of us to go on in spite of the grief and pain that each of us must learn how to live with; one day at a time. I know that God hears and comforts us when we go to Him in prayer. This Circle that you started for your precious son, Shane, has helped so many. It is my prayer that those who are grieving will continue to find more and more moments of peace from the prayers that we pray.

2/11/2002 08:32

Hi Tammy, if I have an impact on any mom or dad here, then it's because God is working through me! Before I come to this Circle to see if anyone has posted, I say a prayer, and also ask my Shane for help also to respond to each person in a way that's meaningful for them. So, as you can see, I have lots of help, I can't take all the credit!
I did forget to post about your miscarriage, and I know it's also devastating for women to lose a child by it. Your husband does sound like your best 'cheerleader', letting you work through your pain in your way. I'm very happy for you now that you have worked through it, and are now blessed with two wonderful children.
I'm very humbled and happy that this site has touched you so profoundly, prayer is the most powerful tool that we have, so a Prayer Circle is a powerful way to help other moms who have experienced a loss. Thank you once again for your kind words and prayers, and you're in ours,
Luv Sandy

2/11/2002 08:40

Hello Verna, you're very welcome, I know that Diane must be so proud of her mom! Yes, you know I agree strongly with you, prayer is the key to travelling on our Journey, and our day to day lives also. I echo your own prayer, and may the wonderful moms on these pages find some peace today,
Luv Sandy

2/13/2002 15:06

I will be praying for all those who have lost a child, I lost my only child and cannot bear more with a miracle from the Lord. My daughter was 12 years old and was killed in a tragic horse accident AUGUST 27, 2001

2/13/2002 17:51

Dear cwgirlriding: I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your daughter. I can only imagine the tremendous pain that you are going through. Please know that you are in my prayers.

Tammy Cooper

2/13/2002 19:58

Hello cwgirlriding, I'm so very sorry to read about your beloved daughter. My heart goes out to you over your loss and the pain you're experiencing. It's only been a while since she passed, so you're still in shock, disbelief and a lot of pain. And that pain is hard, biting and mean. We other moms here know about that pain, it's like no other. Give yourself plenty of time, it's still very early in your Journey of Grief, and learn to be very kind and gentle with yourself, you need it so much right now. Grief has no timetable, so you take as much time as you need, and grieve in your own way, don't listen to well-meaning others. When we lose a child, a big part of ourselves goes with that child, and it takes a lot of time to learn how to live with that. We appreciate your own prayers so much, and you will definitely be prayed for here. May God hold you in the palm of His Hand,
Luv Sandy

2/14/2002 18:14

Hi everyone,I just thought i would drop in just to say i'm hanging in there,i have good days and bad ones.I continue to pray for everyone even tho i don't post.Cwgirlriding,I am so sorry about your precious daughter.I know you are in so much pain right now.Please know that i care and i will be praying for you.It is so hard when we lose our children,we feel like we just can't go on.And it is so fresh for you right now and you are in so much grief.But it will get easier with Gods help.It will never go away,because a big part of you is gone.But we will still have all the memories of our children,no one can take that away.God bless you.Love,Barb

2/14/2002 19:50

Hi Barb, (eudora) glad to see you posting again! It's a comfort to all to know you're still praying, even when you don't post, God bless you. I know in my heart that moms who have posted here continue to lift each other up in prayer, and that's what it's all about, helping each other out, and I can't think of a better way than listening and praying for each mom. God bless you Barb, and you know you're still being prayed for here,
Luv Sandy

2/15/2002 22:49

cwgirlriding~Right now, there is very little I can say that will take away the pain that I know you are feeling over the loss of your precious daughter. But I want you to know that God, and the many, many prayers that are being prayed for you will help you to go on. I believe this with all my heart and soul. Having lost my 36 year old daughter tragically and without warning in a chain reaction wreck involving 2 cars, 2 pickup trucks, [caused by drunk driving], I can
relate to how indescribable your pain is, and will continue to be for a long time. Again, I canít take away the pain, but like others who post here, I can, and most certainly will pray that God will ease your pain as only He can. Your precious daughter is now your
guardian angel; and I can tell you that she is pleading with God to ease your pain. Part of you went with your precious daughter, but she is still with you in spirit, and I believe with
all my heart that God will reveal this to you in time, just as He revealed my precious daughterís spirit is still with me, and just as the other momsí precious children are still with them. The love bond that exists between a mom and her child can never die! Death
has no power over the kind of love a mother and her child have for one another. The loss that you are feeling will become easier to bear in time. As Sandy and the other moms have already stated; you must take all the time you need to grieve. Grief counseling and talking with other moms who have lost a child helps. Reading books written by other bereaved parents will also help. It has been five years since my daughter went home to be with our Lord. There are still days that it seems as though it was just yesterday. I miss her physical presence so very much, but I can feel her spirit so strongly during these times. I know in my heart that each of us will see our precious children again someday. So, again, take all the time you need to grieve your loss. Please know that we are here for you,and you will be prayed for here. May
God bless and keep His loving arms around you, and give you moments of peace as you grieve your tremendous loss. In Jesusí name I pray, Amen

2/16/2002 02:42

Eudora~You are quite welcome. Sometimes, when I havenít posted for a while, I try togo back and read some of the posts Iíve missed. I have gotten so far behind because of the books I mentioned in an earlier post to Sandy. When I read your post about your
precious Carol, it touched my heart. It also brought tears to my eyes. I thought back to the night that I first heard the news that my precious Diane had been killed. Lord, I will
never forget that night. I had to get up from my computer and go to my grieving room; which is my (bathroom) :) - wet a face towel with cold water, wring it out, close my eyes,
cover my face, and let the cold wet towel soothe the warm tears and painful memories. :)
Once I work through those ďvalleyĒ moments, I ask God to help me in my efforts to show compassion and pray for other bereaved moms, just as they have done, and continue to do for me and others, while on this painful journey that we all are on. I ask Him to use me to help make someoneís pain a little easier to bear; if only for a few precious moments at a time! The poems that I write are for everyone who has lost a friend or loved one. I know
that the poems that I write are given to me by our wonderful Lord and Savior. That is, God sends His Holy Spirit to say to me, ďGo write this down!Ē I hope to get both books
published sometime in the future. It is such a tremendous task! I invite you and the other moms to read some of the poems I have posted here and also at the prayer circle I have started in my Dianeís memory. Itís listed in the directory under [Calling...When Death
Comes.] Or, you can get there by clicking on LOVE2U. Sandy has already posted there. (Thanks again, Sandy:) Itís a prayer circle for all who have lost a loved one or friend. I have posted several of my poems as well as memories and other expressions. The poems are for everyone. Some I wrote before Dianeís death and some after. I can tell you even before you share the poems you wrote for your precious Carol; they too, were given to you by Godís Holy Spirit to share with others who have lost a precious child. As Sandy points out frequently, we are doing Godís work for Him, as He directs us, while on this journey. Make no mistake about it, everything we say or do has been assigned. Oh, how I ask that each of you will pray and ask God to help me get this book published soon! I
am 60 years young now, and will be 61 in May, if itís Godís will. Sometimes, I feel like I may not get it finished in time. You see, God told me in a poem that he would reveal for the world to see, the ultimate purpose He had for me. It may be that the work that I am
doing here is all that He would have me to do. And, if it is, I am so grateful that He would trust me to help fulfill such a tremendous task! Still, I pray that He will allow me to stick
around long enough to see just one copy of each of my books in print! :) If not, then I pray that He will see to it that my baby daughter, Cheryl, who is co-author, and her husband, will try to finish ďsomeĒ of what I got started, and have both published. I have
no doubt that both books would be such a tremendous help to all who have suffered the lost of a loved one or friend; but especially the loss of a precious child! So Barb, when you feel the need to write a poem, or a precious memory of your child, it just might be
something God wants you to share with others. For the record, Barb, I am neither a poet or author. I am a grieving mom, just like you, and all the other moms who post here, who
has suffered such a tremendous loss, and I am doing the best I can to fulfill the ultimate purpose God has for me; whatever it turns out to be. And that is true for each and
everyone who post here! May God keep each of us in His loving care! In His Son Jesusí
name I pray, Amen!

2/16/2002 13:39

Hello Verna, (Love2U), so nice to see you posting again. I just wanted to tell you that 60 isn't old, :), and I just know that this book is what God has wanted of you, and He will open the doors to get it published! Your poems are beautiful, straight from the heart, so Our Heavenly Father didn't give you that gift unless He intended you to use it, and give comfort and enjoyment to others. So hang in there, all good things come to those who wait, and in His time, it will one day be sitting on a shelf in a bookstore!! May God bless you on your Journey and your work!
Luv Sandy

2/17/2002 01:44

Hi Sandy (shaner) ~ You know, it never fails, every time I allow myself to get
discouraged, God always sends the messenger to remind me to keep the faith. :) Thank you once again, Sandy, for your encouraging words, and for the gentle ways in which you
encourage all bereaved moms who post here. God knew I needed to be reminded to stop doubting my efforts to do His will. Now, Iím really going to get busy and do my best to finishing both the book and the book of poetry!:)

2/17/2002 18:28

Hi Verna(Love2u)Just wanted to let you know your poems are so beautiful.I just left your prayer circle where i read the ones there.You and Shaner are a lot alike to me.You both are such a comfort to all grieving families.My heart feels more like it is being healed since i came to these sites..Not that i don't think that my own family doesn't love me or care.Its just that here i can be myself to you all and you know how i feel.I mean how i really feel.God bless you for that.I talk to God and i know he has me in the palm of his hand.And that he loves me and cares for me.But we also need human fellowship.And i know that is why he put these prayer circles here.Verna,you are surely not old.But i liked the way you put it because i am 55 years young and i want the rest of my life to do God's will and to be there for anyone that needs me.When you talk about the Holy Spirit it touches my heart,because there is nothing like that still small voice.If you just listen for that instead of jumping in to things,he will always lead you down the right path.I put all my trust in Jesus.I love him so.I will be praying for all the families.Love,Barb

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