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Shane Whalen
This Prayer Circle is Dedicated to my son Shane Whalen Who Passed Away On March 15, 1999 at the Age of 24, & All Other Children

Start a prayer circle for bereaved parents who have lost a child.

There are many of us out there who have lost a child, and it is devastating. It changes the outlook on life, plunges you into a depression, and you think that the feelings and thoughts you have nobody else could possibly relate to. I think a prayer circle for bereaved parents would only benefit us and help us on our journey of grief. This Circle is one of Love, where a Grieving Parent can safely come to for Prayers, and to talk about their feelings.

Shaner -10/14/2000
send to a friend

Read Prayers.

8/30/2006 09:15

Thank you Sandy for the update on Selva. I was wondering about her yesterday when I heard the 'hurricane' was going to hit Florida. I've been praying for her.

OH Jane, thank you for the lyrics. I'm copying and pasting so I'll have them. That is a really good song! I guess I didn't pay that much attention to it when it came out because I wasn't going through my grief yet. The songs that have meant so much to me since Dec. 1, 2004 are I CAN ONLY IMAGINE and HOMESICK (by MercyMe); PRAISE YOU IN THIS STORM (by Casting Crowns); DANCING WITH THE ANGELS (by Monk & Neagle); and of course I've been listening to HE TOUCHED ME: THE GOSPEL MUSIC OF ELVIS PRESLEY (we got that for Carey for Christmas that year; in fact I received it the day before the funeral so I asked if we could play some songs from that at the funeral and it was okay so we did. I remember singing along with one song when I hugged someone and I don't remember who it was; he got an earful of me singing but I don't guess he minded.)

Thank you all for your patience and prayers. You all definitely have mine!
Love, Charlene

8/30/2006 12:11

Message for today

Each week a popular television show takes viewers behind the cameras to
show them how a movie was made, how the special effects were done, and
what happened during the course of filming. It's titled BTS: Behind the
Scenes, and it satisfies a certain curiosity felt by many movie-goers
who ask, "How did they do that?"

If only we could see behind the scenes of our lives! The hidden hand of
God's providence is directing and producing events in life that will
result in our good and His glory. His hidden angels are watching over us
in more ways than we know. His hidden Spirit is refreshing us with
daily joy and strength. His Word, hidden in our hearts, is keeping us from

Much of what God does in our lives is almost imperceptible. He works in
ways we cannot see, sometimes using things so small as to be almost
unnoticeable. But He can account for every detail, and someday we'll

You're in the starring role of your life. Make sure the Lord Jesus is
writer, producer, and director of the story. Turn everything over to Him

I am not skilled to understand What God hath willed, what God hath
planned; I only know that at His right hand Is One Who is my Savior!
Dorothy Greenwell

Good morning Angel Moms!

8/30/2006 12:13

Dear Charlene,
I really like those other songs as well, but "With Hope" put words and validation to what I was feeling. SCC sings it with such passion. Glad you liked the lyrics. Have a blessed day.

8/30/2006 12:18

Dear Verna (or Miss V),
Tomorrow is a special day for me also. It would have been my brother's birthday. He went to Heaven in 1981 after a hiking accident at the age of 19. My prayer for you is that you will sense the protective arm of your Heavenly Father during this time. Know how much you are truly loved.

8/30/2006 12:21

Dear Kathy,
Aaron Shust (sp) was interviewed for his song "My Savior, My God" and he stated the words came from an old hymn. Thank you for sharing the author. We truly are not skilled to understand all of God's way, but we have a Savior Who is and is at this moment interceding for us! How great is that! Thank you for your heavenly thoughts.

8/30/2006 13:31

Dear Jane,
It is awesome isn't it. In spite of all of our pain, grief, hilltops and valleys, God is the only constant thing in our lives. He is the only one who doesn't change. We are blessed deeply in spite of it all.
Love to you.

8/30/2006 20:12

Hi all my dear Angel sisters. First of all thanks for your so much needed prayers, Miami was spared this time and all we got was a Tropical storm, it is a lot of work here during hurricane season, I had to put everything from our yard away and from Solange's garden and the front yard, pots and plants, BBQ etc, then go shopping and you will not believe the long lines at the supermarket and the gas stations, but anyway, we are ready for the next one, this is the peak of hurricane season for us. I am sorry I have not written lately, but beside the hurricane, I was in a big fight with AOL because I kept getting disconected, ay Ms V. those poor techs know us both by our first name, but guess what? it wasn't AOL's fault, it was our telephone line that was giving us the problem, we have a second line for our fax machine and the internet, then my sister mentioned to me that she was having problems with the fax and then I realized it was the line, I did write to AOL and appologized.I promised that I will be back on line everyday, but I want you all to know, that my prayers are with you 24/7. Kathy, Jane, Charlene, Donna, Connie, you are all wonderful Angel sisters and a great support in our Circle of Love, I have read your posts and I admire your Faith. Yes we have to forgive those people who try to help but don't know how, only us, who have experienced the loss of a child can relate, the rest, even though they try, just don't get it, I have heard the words I hate the most "You have to go on with your life" OMG, they just don't have a clue, my life ended Aug 15th 2002, but I learned to forgive and don't even bother to explain, I just pray that they will never go through this. My dear Charlene, I hope that you are feeling better with your shoulder's pain, and I know the other pain, just be patient my dear sister, your daughter will come to terms with her own grief, give her time, she still loves you and you are still her mom and she will realize this, people grief in so many different ways, some try to hide the pain, but it will come out sooner or later, and I am sure you will be there for her. God Bless you my dear sister, I can only imagine how much it hurts. Donna, remember I know the pain of loosing an only child, that makes it even worse, all my co workers whose children grew up with Solange, are starting to become grandmothers, they keep bringing me the pictures of their beautiful babies and even though I am so happy for them, because their children are so dear to me, it hurts so much because I will never be a grandmother, I will never have my daughter's wedding to attend and so on. It is hard my dear sister and of course your health problems does not help, but I am sure that prayers works, and with all our prayers you will be much better, I am sure that God will say, OK, OK, I will give Donna her health back. My love and prayers for all of you my dear new and old Angel sisters. Selva

8/30/2006 20:19

My dear dear Ms. V. my heart goes out to you tonight and my prayers will stay with you all day tomorrow, I know my dear sister that time does not make it any easier when it comes to special dates, we re live those moments and the pain flows again and again, my prayers will be with you and I pray that you will get a sign from Diane tomorrow, so that you'l know that she is still singing with our Angels, keeping them quiet, although I know there will be a very loud and happy birthday party tomorrow for Diane, so the kids will not be quiet, but I also know that Diane will be happy and surrounded by the love of her Angel sisters and brothers and of course Jesus will be there too, and He will smile and guess what? I wonder if He will eat cake? maybe He will, special dates are special dates, so com'on, eat your cake too my dear Lord, we have to celebrate the coming of a very special Angel to Heaven. My prayers are with you my dear Ms. V. and also my love. Selva

8/30/2006 20:29

Hi my dear Angel in Chief sister. Thanks for posting for me. I went to work today (sucks) I am so tired, but Thank God we were spared this time, I am thinking of leaving everything away from the yard, after all we are at the peak of hurricane season now, I will wait a while to put Solange's garden little things back up, after all with this heat, I can not find flowers that will bloom with the heat. Thanks my dear sister for your prayers and love, I don't know what I will do without you and all the Angel sisters in this wonderful Circle of Love, everytime I pray I Thank God for taking me here when I needed it the most, you have saved my life many times, and I Thank God and I Thank you my dear dear sister. This is a very lonely road, and only us who have traveled it will understand. I Thank Shane for inspired you to built this Circle of Love and understanding, so many times I though of taking my life and thanks to this Circle of Love I didn't, I realized that God is the only one who decides when my mission here is done (I hope soon) but thanks to you and all these wonderful Angel sisters, We keep PRESSING ON. Love you my dear dear sister. Selva

8/30/2006 20:49

Selva it's good to hear from you again. I'm glad the storm wasn't bad this time; hopefully we will have NONE like last year. Living in the midwest we just prepare for tornadoes (which are bad enough) but at least we don't have to worry about flooding where I live.
Thank you for being concerned about my shoulder; the pain is tolerable now and since I'm doing some strengthening exercises I can move it more than I did before. I don't have full range of motion yet but at least the pain isn't as bad as it was. Still no lifting with that arm, so that makes it awkward going to the store by myself; at least I can drive again and hold the steering wheel with BOTH hands. :o) Nobody panic; I only tried driving one time with just one hand and it was a nightmare so I didn't do it again. And I'm off of the major pain meds; my stomach was hurting from taking so much, so now I'm on herbal joint pain supplements. They are working and I'm SO glad to be off the major stuff. It's amazing how housework piles up when I can't do it; I did laundry all day today and even changed the bedsheets by myself. Baby steps are wonderful when I haven't been able to do even that much for a month or two.
I'll be posting the entire Special Dates List tomorrow with the updates added to it. That's so all the new sisters can have the list too.
Love and prayers to you all,

8/31/2006 07:23

Verna, you are in my prayers today! May our loving Heavenly Father surround you with His COMFORT, REST, and PEACE today in Jesus' name.
Love, Charlene

8/31/2006 08:50

Our dear Miss V,
Another Special Day and they're still painful to go through, as we've said so many times here, (and its the truth) time doesn't mean anything when you've lost a precious child. Those memories and moments have become golden to you now, to all of us now, and I pray that you experience some of those golden memories today - and cry over them, I don't have to tell you that.
My Candle is lit and I pray that you do feel Diane around you today, as well as peace and comfort from God.
Love you my dear Miss V,
rayers & Hugs too,

8/31/2006 09:36

(If I have made an error or have forgotten someone, please let me know! These are listed in date order. Specially note the Sept. dates coming up. Thank you.)

Susan (stwiny): Alex Jan. 2, 1983(BD)

Charlene (havelost4): (granddaughter) Casey Marie Jan. 7, 1992(BD)
Margie (kimemandjakesmom): (stepdaughter) Casey Marie Jan. 7, 1992(BD)

Connie (connienevada): Derrick Jan. 18, 2006(HD)

Anita (astarte1225): Kimberly Feb. 9, 1980(BD)

Donna (arqt): Marcus Feb.20, 2002(HD)

Anita (astarte1225): Joshua Feb. 24, 2006(HD)

Charlene (havelost4): (grandson) Baby boy Feb. 25, 1989(BD)

Lisa (LosaLou862): Aaron Mar. 2, 1983(BD)

Yvonne (dovesfromheaven): Joseph(Joe) Mar. 7, 1975(BD)

Sandy (shaner): Shane Mar.15, 1999(HD)
Cindy (cindys1021): Kristina Mar. 15, 2001(HD)

Charlene (havelost4): (granddaughter) Carey Grace Mar. 18, 1994(BD)

Alexandra (mis4mary): Kristian Mar. 26, 1980(BD)

Charlene (havelost4): (grandson) Michael Mar. 27, 1989(BD & HD)

Barb (eudora): Carol Ann April 2, 1999(HD)

Cindy (cindys1021): Kristina April 6, 1980(BD)

Jennifer (jhdanner): Aimee Nichole May 1, 1993(HD)

Susan (stwiny): Alex May 8, 2003(HD)

Sandy (shaner): Shane May 28, 1974(BD)

Kay (kalycec53): Joshua June 12, 1982(BD)

Kay (kalycec53): Joshua June 15, 2005(HD)

Sue (sue64): Gary July 1, 2004(HD)

Jane (jpot): Elizabeth July 14, 1979(HD)

Marci (beachmom45): Sean-Michael July 15, 1985(BD)

Barb (eudora): Carol Ann July 20, 1963(BD)

Anita (astarte1225): Joshua July 28, 1983(BD)

Marci (beachmom45): Sean-Michael Aug. 9, 2003(HD)

Kathy (KPETERSEN): Wes Aug. 11, 2005(HD)

Deb (deborahpoo): Michael Aug. 12, 1981(BD)

Deb (deborahpoo): Michael Aug. 14, 2000(HD)

Phyllis (prayerbunny): Rhonda Aug. 15, 1965(BD)
Selva (selvam): Solange Aug. 15, 2002(HD)

Verna (Love2u): Diane Aug. 16, 1960(BD)

Verna (Love2u): Diane Aug. 31, 1996(HD)

Connie (connienevada): Derrick Sept. 2(BD)

Phyllis (prayerbunny): Rhonda Sept. 3, 2005(HD)

Chris (smile713): (stepdaughter) Stephanie Sept. 24, 1982(BD)

Chris (smile713): (stepdaughter) Stephanie Sept. 25, 2003(HD)

Lisa (LisaLou862): Aaron Sept. 26, 2002(HD)

Alexandra (mis4mary): Kristian Sept. 29, 2003(HD)
Phyllis (prayerbunny): Nikki Sept. 29, 2005(HD)

Lee Ann (lask): Ryan Oct. 19, 1982(BD)

Lee Ann (lask): Ryan Nov. 5, 2005(HD)

Sue (sue64): Gary Nov. 11, 1985(BD)

Yvonne (dovesfromheaven): Joseph(Joe) Nov. 20, 1999(HD)

Charlene (havelost4): (granddaughters) Casey Marie & Carey Grace Dec. 1, 2004(HD)
Margie (kimemandjakesmom): (stepdaughter) Casey Marie Dec. 1, 2004(HD)

Selva (selvam): Solange Dec. 7, 1981(BD)
Anita (astarte1225): Kimberly Dec. 7, 1998(HD)

Donna (arqt): Marcus Dec. 12, 2001(BD)

Jennifer (jhdanner): Aimee Nichole Dec. 20, 1992(BD)

Love you all!!

8/31/2006 11:28

I am SO SORRY Imelda that I omitted your Shane's dates in the Special Dates List. Here they are for all of you:

Imelda (adamshanesmom): Shane Sept. 22, 1990(BD)
Imelda (adamshanesmom): Shane Nov. 17, 2004(HD)


8/31/2006 12:07

Dear Charlene,
I don't know how you got Elizabeth's HD, her BD is May 18, 1979. Thank you so much for the list. All that typing with a bum shoulder! I was thinking the other day the maybe the reason for the conflict with your daughter is because she's still in denial and when she sees you some reality breaks through. That would be extremely disturbing for her. As we all have said, each of us grieve in our own time and way. I suspect there will be a day when the total reality hits and she'll need you. You'll be far enough along to offer her hope for her journey. Thank you for all the love and support you freely give here. Love, Jane

8/31/2006 12:15

Dear Verna,
If I could come through the screen and put my arms around you I would. Since that's impossible, imagine being hugged by all of us. More importantly envision your Heavenly Father embracing you. He is doing that now. Special dates are difficult and you have two so close together. I know from experience this year is harder because it marks the 10 year date. Know our love and prayers are with you. Do whatever you need to do to honor Diane. Remember we have a great hope that other's don't have. Love, Jane

8/31/2006 13:49

Jane, thank you for Elizabeth's birthdate. I'm sure I got her homegoing date from one of your posts back in the middle of August. I'll email all those on my email list with her birthdate.
Yes, I've thought several times that Cathy is still in denial and it hurts her too much to see us or be at our house because of the memories. They were here (her and all 4 of her kids) at least once or twice a week plus holidays; so there are a LOT of memories here of her girls. Thank you!
Love, Charlene

8/31/2006 14:24

Dear Verna,
My heart is with you. I know that God will give you everything you need for today. Our children must be so proud of us! We are very couragous and strong women. I am convinced that we have been chosen by God to lead the way. Our pain only makes us stronger as we travel these hills and valleys. We have the strength to do it yet again, with our Lord by our side. Love and peace to you.

8/31/2006 14:42

Because the way was steep and long,
And through a strange and lonely land,
God placed upon my lips a song,
And put a lantern in my hand.

8/31/2006 19:55

My dear Ms. V. Once again my dear sister, yes once again you have to relive those memories, even though I sent you an e mail today, I just want you to know that my prayers are still with you, i prayed all day that God will wrap His Arms around you to give you comfort and strenght,we all know that special dates are so rough on us, may you feel Diane at your side today as always, and remember all our Angel kids are with her today also. My love and prayers to you my dear dear sister. Selva

8/31/2006 20:02

My dear sister Charlene. You have been Heaven sent in this Circle of Love, thanks so much for you care and love, for keeping our sad but so much needed list updated, even with your pain. Special days are so hard on us, even harder than our every day pain, and it's a blessing to be able to count on prayers when we need it the most, I know prayers works and like I always say, coming from us bereaved parents, prayers really get to Him, He knows how much we are hurting, and as far as i am concerned, He owes us a little more attention to our prayers. Thanks again my dear sister. My love and prayers. Selva

8/31/2006 22:20

Charlene, what a wonderful thing you did by listing everyone's hds and bds. Thank you so much! I have one more day to go before Derrick's memorial service. I have 50 people that rsvp'd. I will barbque all day tomorrow and I started preparing the food. Derrick's favorites. Everyone already asked if I was making homemade banana pudding and peach cobbler. I think this will be a birthday celebration that all of them will remember. I know Derrick is looking down and taking numbers on whos coming, who is not coming, out many plate a person is getting. He was so proud of my cooking. Always bragged about me been the best cook in the world. He had his friends not eating their own mother's food because they said it doesn't taste like mine. Derrick was my number one fan. Enough about him how is everyone? I am so glad the storm passed over you all. Its kinda of scary. I live in Chicago so the only thing we worry about is the snow and the 50 below 0 weather. I pray for all of you. remember who is in control. God bless you all.

8/31/2006 23:40

Dear Connie,
First, I also live near Chicago, in Elgin. So we're practically neighbors! Second, I'm going to pray for you tomorrow. I know how much love you are going to put into your cooking, but remember to rest a little. You don't want to drop from exhaustion on your Derrick's memorial day. Third, I just love peach cobbler, I had a great recipe but lost it during my divorce. Lost a lot when I moved out. When you get a chance (next week maybe) would you please e-mail me your recipe? I pray the memorial will be a joyous day.

8/31/2006 23:47

Dear Verna,
I trust you made it through another special day. I know we talk of our child's special day, but today was a special day for my brother. He was 19 when he went to Heaven. Today he would have been 45. He went to Heaven just short of 2 years of my Elizabeth. It doesn't how many years go by, these days still suck. Know that you have been in my prayers. Love, Jane

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