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Shane Whalen
This Prayer Circle is Dedicated to my son Shane Whalen Who Passed Away On March 15, 1999 at the Age of 24, & All Other Children


Start a prayer circle for bereaved parents who have lost a child.


There are many of us out there who have lost a child, and it is devastating. It changes the outlook on life, plunges you into a depression, and you think that the feelings and thoughts you have nobody else could possibly relate to. I think a prayer circle for bereaved parents would only benefit us and help us on our journey of grief. This Circle is one of Love, where a Grieving Parent can safely come to for Prayers, and to talk about their feelings.

 
Shaner -10/14/2000
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selvam
7/23/2005 16:38

Hi dear Maria. I am sorry that we all have to meet this way, I am also so sorry for the loss of your Wayne. I lost my only child Solange, Aug 15th, 2002, she felt sleep while driving. I am sorry that you have to deal with the additional pain that can bring a murder case. I remember when the detectives came to the Hospital before Solange left, to explain what had happenned, I left the room. Please my dear friend, come back here as often as you can, you will find, first of all, understanding, this pain is so complicated that people who have not dealt with it, just simply has no clue, all of us here has lost a child, we know that pain. We do not judge ane another, we simply let our hearts out here and everybody understand, and second you will really find true love and prayers here. Love Selva


selvam
7/23/2005 16:42

Hi my dear sister Jennifer, so glad you found this Circle of Love and keep coming back. Yes this is the safest place to be when you are packing such a load. We all understand of this pain, which is the worse any human being can handle and with the help of our dear Angel in Chief Sandy and our dear CEO Verna, we are blessed by their presence in this Circle. Love Selva


jhdanner
7/23/2005 17:32

hi my sweet Selva, Awhile ago I did'nt mean to leave you out. I praise God for you also. You have also offered such loving advice and comfort. You also have helped me when I was feeling down and having a vally day. I hope I can grow to be as knowaldge able as all of you. I remember telling Sandy I was still what they call a baby in christ. I want God to bless me with the wisdom he has you. I want to be able to give words of wisdom as well as shareing my story and grief.I know that all of you will be a blessing in my life. ALL MY LOVE AND BUTTERFLY HUGS, Jennifer


njjoe
7/25/2005 09:36

Sandy,
I just read of your prayer circle now. I am so very sorry to read about the loss of your son. I cannot imagine what you went through, or are still going through. No parent should ever have to bury their child..I am so very sorry. God rest his soul and give you and your family strength and comfort.
God Bless
Joe


Shaner
7/25/2005 14:50

Hi Joe,
This is so nice of you to come here and post, I can't begin to tell you how pleasantly surprised I was to see your name here, God bless you. Thank you for your kind words and prayers, when you lose a beloved child it's something you never get over, but in time you learn how to live with it, with God's help and support from terrific people as we have here and those like you who take the time to come here and post.
May God bless you and your family abundantly Joe, still praying for you as well,
Your's in Christ & Angel Hugs,
Sandy


Shaner
7/25/2005 15:20

Hello our dear AngelMom Jennifer, my first chance to come to the Circle since Friday. Ah, you're such a sweetie and a blessing yourself to this Circle, so the same applies to you too!
You're a loving, caring person and the light of Christ shines brightly through you!
Thank you for your very kind words, I know Verna and Selva will be touched by them too as I am, but I know they'll agree with me that our help come's from God, so the Glory goes to Him, :-).
I think you do a very good job of reaching out to others here and your words in your postings bring love and comfort to those who need it so much. So don't sell yourself short, I'm just as honored and blessed to have met you and in the short time I've known you, I can tell you have a heart of gold and a beautiful spirit to match, :-). Love you too, dear one, I'm not planning on going anywhere, God willing.
Butterflies are so beautiful and symbolic of new life, our dear sister Selva has had her experiences with Butterflies. I'll just close my eyes and imagine how beautiful a Butterfly hug is,
Lots of love, prayers & Angel Hugs,
Sandy


Shaner
7/25/2005 15:24

Hello our dear AngelMom Jennifer, my first chance to come to the Circle since Friday. Ah, you're such a sweetie and a blessing yourself to this Circle, so the same applies to you too!
You're a loving, caring person and the light of Christ shines brightly through you!
Thank you for your very kind words, I know Verna and Selva will be touched by them too as I am, but I know they'll agree with me that our help come's from God, so the Glory goes to Him, :-).
I think you do a very good job of reaching out to others here and your words in your postings bring love and comfort to those who need it so much. So don't sell yourself short, I'm just as honored and blessed to have met you and in the short time I've known you, I can tell you have a heart of gold and a beautiful spirit to match, :-). Love you too, dear one, I'm not planning on going anywhere, God willing.
Butterflies are so beautiful and symbolic of new life, our dear sister Selva has had her experiences with Butterflies. I'll just close my eyes and imagine how beautiful a Butterfly hug is,
Lots of love, prayers & Angel Hugs,
Sandy


Shaner
7/25/2005 15:29

oops, well, as our dear Miss V say's double the posting, double the blessing!


Shaner
7/25/2005 15:32

Hello our dear Kim,
My thoughts and prayers have been with you the past week and today, this special day. I pray your move to Florida went well, please post when you can,
Much love, prayers & Angel Hugs,
Sandy


LOVE2U
7/25/2005 17:51

Hello dear AngelMoms/Dads, ~ I pray that all is well in your neck of the woods, :) and that everyone is feeling a measure of God's unconditional love and peace of mine of mind which only He can give.

Sandy, I thank God for bringing us all together to support each other on what we angel moms know is an endless journey. I thank God every day that I no longer have to feel that I'm traveling this road alone. It goes without saying that if it was within our own power, none of us would be here for the sad and regrettable reason that we are.

I would love to submit one of my rambling posts, but right now so much is going on I just don't have the time. My main reason for coming here today is to request prayer for my dearly beloved mother-in-law. My husband, David, received a call this morning from her doctor, and it doesn't sound good. Right now, I am very concerned about my husband also. He is very devoted to his Mom, and he tries to make sure that she gets the very best of care. Still, it is hard of him not being able to be there every day to check on her for himself. He checks on her daily by phone. Also, she is surrounded by other relatives and friends, but it's not the same as being able to be there in times of crisis, like now. He and his brother, Lynn went down this past Saturday, and though her condition was serious, he said she smile and recognized both he and Lynn. My mother-in-law had only the two sons. My husband is the oldest son. Needless to say, I am so proud of the way these guys look after their dear mother. If I'd had sons, I would like to believe that they would be as caring as hubby and his brother are towards their mom; God bless them. Hubby and I have been married for almost 50 years, so we kind of feel each other's moods. He is the strong, disciplined military type, but that doesn't stop me from being me. Haha! He knows I am always on an emotional roll-a-coaster!!! So, basically, ... I guess I am reaching out for prayers to help me be as strong as possible for them as well during this time, because my mother-in-law and I have always been very close; and since I am needed here to help out with Felecia, ... I can't always make the trip down there. So, I really need your prayers for strength and wisdom to accept God's will for my dear MIL. Thanks angel moms; I already know I can count on you all. ::)

Well, I guess this is a rambler after all! :) Jennifer, Sandy has said it so well. You are such a kind and caring angel mom and your gentle and caring spirit shines through brightly! As I've often expressed here, and believe with all my heart: God is not impressed with big words or grandstanding; etc. As my dear mother, MaDear, use to say: "God is concerned about people, ... All people." And, He hears all prayers that come from the heart. Therefore,I just thank Him for allowing me to serve Him by being there for others, in anyway that I can. Just remember; No one is in a position to take credit for doing God's work. For, without Him, I/We can do nothing! :)To God be the glory!

I will keep Ya'll posted on my dear
M-I-L's condition, and thanks again AngelMoms for your prayers.

Love & AngelHugs,
Verna


LOVE2U
7/25/2005 18:03

OK, ... Calling all AngelMoms/Dads! :) It's check-in time! We need to know that you are hanging in there! We worry when we don't know how you are getting along. Just a quick "I'm OK" will do. :)

Much love & AngelHugs,
Verna/aka Miss V. :)
Diane's mom

Also, Selva, please check in! You are working too hard. :( Besides, we need to know that you are OK with all the bad weather and all.


jhdanner
7/25/2005 21:29

Hello anglemoms, I have some wounderful neews to share with you all. Today started Vacation Bible School at the new church that we just started going to and I took all 3f my children. When I went back to pick them up I was informed that my daughter gave her life to the lord tonight. PRAISE GOD!!!!!!!! I was so thrilled I had to share this with my beloved sisters. I figured a little good news helps us face the bad sometimes and if anybody would rejoyce with me I knew it would be you guys. God Is so good. Ialso want to report that Sunday I worked 12 hours Sunday and my husbandgot up and him and the children went to church without me. That means that he really likes the church.Know when she and I go to sleep at night I don't have to worry where her soul will go and neither does she. What a glories thought. Verna, my prayers and thoughts will be with you and your husband. I also have a wounderful MIL who I love dearly.I will be storming heaven with prayers that you can be strong for your husband when he needs you the most. It's always hard to be strong for the ones we love when we know the pain. If your anything like me you want to take the pain away and you know you can't and thats the hardest part.My God be with you my sister and keep you and your husband in his loving hands. ALL MY LOVE AND BUTTERFLY HUGS, JENNIFER


jhdanner
7/25/2005 21:36

OOOHHHH, MY!!!!!! I don't know what happened to part of my posting but I hope you get the message. Love to all, Jen


Shaner
7/26/2005 07:20

Ah yes, dear Miss V, you can always count on us for prayers. May Our Lord give you and David His strength, peace to help at this time.

That's wonderful dear Jen, very happy for you and your family!
Much love & Angel Hugs,
Sandy


Shaner
7/26/2005 10:05

Grief Wish List

If you have been through grief you will relate to this. If you are going through it you will relate. If you have never been through this type of grief. keep this handy ... it may help you one day.

My Grief Wish List

1. I wish you would not be afraid to speak my loved one's name. They lived and were important and I need to hear their name.

2. If I cry or get emotional if we talk about my loved one, I wish you knew that it isn't because you have hurt me; the fact they have died has caused my tears. You have allowed me to cry and I thank you. Crying and emotional outbursts are healing.

3. I wish you wouldn't let my loved one die again by removing from your home his pictures, artwork or other remembrances.

4. I will have emotional highs and lows, ups and downs. I wish you wouldn't think that if I have a good day my grief is all over, or that if I have a bad day, I need psychiatric counseling.

5. I wish you knew that the death of a child is different from other losses and must be viewed separately. It is the ultimate tragedy and I wish you wouldn't compare it to your loss of a parent, a spouse or a pet.

6. Being a bereaved person is not contagious, so I wish you wouldn't stay away from me.

7. I wish you knew all the crazy grief reactions that I am having are in fact very normal. Depression, anger, frustration and hopelessness and the questioning of values and beliefs are to be expected following a death.

8. I wish you wouldn't expect my grief to be over in six months. The first few years are going to be exceedingly traumatic for us. As with alcoholics, I will never be 'cured' or a 'formerly bereaved,' but forever be a 'recovering' from my bereavement.

9. I wish you understood the physical reaction to grief. I may gain weight or lose weight, sleep all the time or not at all, develop, a lot of illnesses and be accident prone, all of which are related to my grief.

10. Our loved one's birthday, the anniversary of his death and the holidays are terrible times for us. I wish you could tell us that you are thinking about them on these days and if we get quiet and withdrawn, just know that we are thinking about them and don't try to coerce us into being cheerful.

11. I wish you wouldn't offer to take me out for a drink, or to a party, this is just a temporary crutch and the only way I can get through this grief is to experience it. I have hurt before and I can heal.

12. I wish you understood that grief changes people. I am not the same person I was before my loved one died and I never will be that person again. If you keep waiting for me to get back to 'my old self', you will stay frustrated. I am a new creature with new thoughts, dreams, aspirations, values and beliefs. Please try to get to know the new me: maybe you will still like me.

Unknown



bigshug85
7/26/2005 12:05

hello, my is maria,feb.22,2004, my son wayne who was 18yrs. old was murdered then raped, i feel your pain.and it hurts like hell, my son was my world,now it's empty,sometimes i don't know what to do.i feel so lost.he was born ~12~25~85~it has been very ruff for me,i have a 6yr.old lil girl who to has a ruff time.we all miss him.you are in our prayers and eep us in yours. god bless.


Ellen0425
7/26/2005 15:02

A friend of my daughter's was tragically killed a month ago. He was 15 and an only child. Please pray for his mother and all the people left behind who miss him greatly. His name was Kyle Beck.


NJJoe
7/27/2005 11:50

Blessings and peace to all that have posted above. Maria & Hellen, I am so sorry to hear of the lose you both have suffered. Rest assured, that we will ALL be together again someday. Maria, your Wayne has gone ahead of you to prepare a place in yoour eternal home..I am sure that you feel him with you. Helen, I am sorry to hear of Kyle's passing. I too have a 15 year old boy at home, along with a 17 and 14 year old as well. I cannot imagine the pain of losing them. I wish Kyle peace. God Bless you both.
Joe


selvam
7/27/2005 20:39

Ay my dear Miss V of course that you can count on our prayers for your mom in law and David, yes my dear sister, we are all in this together, so whatever we can do to help, you know that we will be there for you and family, please keep us posted. Love and prayers. Selva


selvam
7/27/2005 20:42

Hi Jennifer. That is good nes about your family and I am so happy you found the right church, and please don't ever apologize to me, I am here for you all, there is no judgement here, just love and prayers, and believe me you can count on our prayers for sure, also buterflies are Solange's favorites. Love you my dear friend, and you know this is safe Heaven. Selva


selvam
7/27/2005 20:50

Hi Maria, please keep us posted about how you are feeling, we all understand, this is a very complicated pain, only us who has experienced really understand, you know? my birthday is Dec 25th. the real capricorns who are born on the 25th are really great people, full of love, so my dear sister, keep coming back here, you will find such an understanding that you will never find anywhere else. Love Selva


selvam
7/27/2005 20:53

Hi Joe, you must be a heck of a guy Thanks for your prayers and understanding, you have no idea how hard this is. Love Selva


selvam
7/27/2005 20:59

Hi Ellen. Thanks for posting here, of course we will pray for Kyle and his parents, I lost my only child Solange, she was only 20 years old, and yes we all understand that pain, that is so great of you to ask for prayers for Kyle's parents, God Bless You, you must be a very special person, and yes, you can tell his parents that we will pray for them and Kyle, you have no idea how many Angel Kids are in Heaven just waiting for our reunion, but they are safe now. Love Selva


jhdanner
7/28/2005 12:37

Hi Selva, You said Solange loved butterflys. Well, there is a park here in our area that I go walking sometimes and there are several butterfly gardens in memeroy of prople. I thought of donatong money to the park in AAmiees memory but after thinking about it I decided I wanted my own garden. I've been thinking about this for a couple of years and have beren waiting to do this. We just bought our house 4 months ago and I've already picked out the spot for my butterfly garden. I 've already invisioned how beautiful it will look. Ihave also been getting info together so next summer when I get ready to start it I will know exactly what to do and hoe to get started. Butterflys are so beautiful and I have loved them and angles ever since Amiee died. I have a big case in my living room that is full of baby angles that I have bought or been given to me and they all are dear to me. I also have pictures of Amiee in there to so people will understand the meaning of these angles. Sandy told me that butterflys mean,"NEW LIFE", and how right she is. I cant wait to make my butterfly garden. It will be my own little guiet place where I can go and pray and feel like I am near my Amiee. Wish me luck on it.
Love and Butterfly Hugs,
Jennifer

 
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