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Shane Whalen
This Prayer Circle is Dedicated to my son Shane Whalen Who Passed Away On March 15, 1999 at the Age of 24, & All Other Children

Start a prayer circle for bereaved parents who have lost a child.

There are many of us out there who have lost a child, and it is devastating. It changes the outlook on life, plunges you into a depression, and you think that the feelings and thoughts you have nobody else could possibly relate to. I think a prayer circle for bereaved parents would only benefit us and help us on our journey of grief. This Circle is one of Love, where a Grieving Parent can safely come to for Prayers, and to talk about their feelings.

Shaner -10/14/2000
send to a friend

Read Prayers.

5/17/2004 23:55

Dear Sandy and Selva,
Thank you for acknowledging me...I too am tired of this nightmare.

It has been a little rough lately, My son Evan is tired of a "Mom who cries all the time." I told him that I really do try to not let him see me cry, but it is hard when it just comes over you. At least High school swim season is over and Evan will no longer be participating in High School meets, only United States Swimming meets. At High School Meets we come across families who either swim for us or have swam with us or another team. We have been in this community a long time. It is guaranteed that we will come across many that we know. Some one always cries, and of course that makes me cry!

We are trying to adjust to life, but it seems like there is something always coming up to cause a crisis.
I will be family just got home from swim practice and wants attention (aka/dinner).

Love and prayers to all,

5/18/2004 15:27

Ah our dear Marci, my heart goes out to you reading your post, it's filled with your pain and I can feel it. It's also so complicated and complex, and on top of that, (if that wasn't enough) it shift's the family dynamic's, or at the very least affect's them.
Evan just doesn't understand, he want's his Mom back, I understand too how you try to hide your tear's from him, I did the same with Chris, but they still know, as hard as we try, smiling when we don't feel like it, laughing too, they see through it all. It's so hard to keep up a facade, when inside you're every fiber is crying out. Yes, thankfully for you the high school swim meet's are over, and for Evan too of course. If only it was a nightmare and you could WAKE up from it. If only we could ALL wake up from it. Next week is Shane's Birthday, and yesterday I was sitting here thinking, wondering, what would he look like now, turning 30, if he was still here? Would he be married by now, with children? It started to get too painful, so I shut it down. I just didn't feel like dealing with the pain yesterday - I know, I'm not practising what I preach, :-). I'm not looking forward to it, but I will deal with it, one bite at a time,
Always in my love, support & prayers,

5/19/2004 11:47

Hello Sandy and to all the angels moms & dads. Sandy sorry I haven't been out to post lately, but as we all know life goes on even when our love ones are not with us. I have really fallen deep into dark valley days. It seems the closer it gets to Nick's one year since he left us the harder the days are getting. Nick passed away on July 5, 2003. I thought I was doing pretty well until yesterday, I just couldn't get myself together and I didn't get to sleep until 4am this morning. I haven't been doing much today since I got up and took Michael to school. Everyone tells me that I will have days like these and I do realize that but I just don't think they understand what I am going through if they haven't lost a child. If I could just pick up and leave where I am at and go some where else I think I would. But I know that Michael needs me and that I need him, he is the one who keeps me going. Nick was my pride and joy and I just feel that there are days that he is going to come home to me. I think I am so frustrated that I can't even dream of him.. I dream of everything else but Nick. I miss Nick so much just as all of you miss your precious ones. God bless everyone and my prayers are with all of you.

5/19/2004 19:38

Hi my dear sister Marci. I understand (we all do) about the pain you are going through and then trying to keep up with the rest of the family, but listen to me my dear sister, everytime you have to hold your tears, count your blessings, at least you have other children, husband, family around you, you still have a meaning to your life, yes cry, I am sure that they will understand,you don't have to be all that strong, you are a Mom who lost a child, and believe me, they will never understand, but they know the pain, and they will respect that. Just be sure, every time you want to let it all out, we are here for you. We do understand. You are a great Mom. Love. Selva

5/19/2004 19:48

Hi our dear sister Billie, yes that is the way it is, one day you feel a little better and wow it hits you again. Yes we would like to go somewhere else, and wake up from this nightmare, but all we have left to do is pray, and pray and pray, so that God will give us some relief, like they say, If God puts you through it, He will pull you through it, but it can get nasty, you keep on postin here, because we do understand, we are all going through the same pain, and this my dear sister, it is the worse pain anybody could endure, we are lucky enough that we are still alive, sometimes I wonder how. But we have to keep pressing on like our dear sister Eva says, we have to keep pressing on and wait. Love is eternal, you are still Nicks mother and he is your son, that no one can take away from you. We will be with our children once again, when God decides, and this time FOREVER. Love my dear sister, and remember we are here for you. Love Selva

5/19/2004 23:25

Hi dear Bilie, it's terrific to see a Post from you, ah, you don't have to apoligize sweeetie, but you have been missed! It's very common what you're feeling, it's only your 1st year, some day's you feel you're making progress and then you backslide, but that's ok, grief is very much like that, 2-3 step's forward and then 1-2 back, especially as you approach your precious Nick's 1st year Anniversary, it's bound to put you back into the valley. No, you're right, unless they've lost a child they will never be able to understand, people certainly mean well, but sometime's what they say to us hurt's us even deeper. It's definitely not their fault, Praise God they've never gone through this, or had it happen to them, that's why we get so much comfort and support around other Moms, Dads who've experienced this ultimate of loss's. You're still in the shock and disbelief stage, and that's ok too, it's just too painful right now for you to accept it as real.
You grieve at your own pace and your own time, as I said, it hasn't even been a year for you yet, so your feeling's are still very much raw and painful, God love you. You will dream about your Nick, I know how desperately you want to, some Moms have dreams right away, other's later on, but they will happen! Yes, I know what a blessing Mike is to you, and he does need you badly too, that's definitely a reason to keep pressing on, as our sister Selva said, as hard and as difficult as it may be right now for you. We all understand so much how badly you miss your Nick, your head might say he's in Heaven, but your heart is saying I want him back. This is the worst, isn't it. But at least you're here, letting it out, and yes, please come back again and post, let us know how you're doing, feeling, we all care and want to help, you're among all of us here who do understand, and you know you always have our love, support and prayers,
Much love & lots of Angel Hugs,

5/20/2004 12:07

To lose a child goes against everthing we believe as the natural order of things. It is unfathomable. However, our children are born for a reason. While the anger, rage and confusion must be lived fully, we must eventually encounter and embrace the meaning of their lives, and be grateful.

5/20/2004 23:42

Hello daver1pro, welcome to the Circle!
You don't say in your Post whether you've lost a child, but the wisdom in your Post suggest's that. Yes, we all have to tread through the stormy weather of our grief Journey, before we can arrive at that place within each of us, however long it take's, where we can learn how to live with the pain, loss and enjoy a sunset again. One never fully recover's, it will be with us for the rest of our day's, but we will once again laugh, enjoy life, albeit in a different way, and be able to take away from our child the lesson's they gave us, and be forever grateful to God for putting them into our live's, however long it was. Please post back again, and tell us of yourself, you're always welcome here,
Love & Angel Hugs,

5/23/2004 09:15

Good Morning Everyone,
Up with the birds this morning, awoke to another grey day, it's rained off and on since Thursday! This is a long weekend for us, Monday is Victoria Day.
More commonly known as 'firecracker day', every city, town has their own big display of Firework's, when the boys were younger we'd always take them to Lake Ontario Park for their big display. I feel sorry for those that work and had outdoor plan's for the first long weekend of the summer, with our ucky weather.
It's been unusually quiet here lately, where is everybody? I'm lonely here, somebody pop in and say Hi, :-) Missing you all,
Much love & Angel Hugs,

5/23/2004 13:05

Another hard week for mike and our families. stephanie was in dance for many years, fri & sat were this years dance recital ( 1st without her ) my daughter & 3 of mikes nieces were dancing. the recital was geared around stephanie. Mike went on stage and announced the recipient of the Stephanie tooley scolorship, he read something he prepared. they sang & danced in memory of Miss Stephanie.
very emotional evenings. (Fri & Sat )
She must be very proud of her father, He did great.
Thank you for letting me share !

5/23/2004 14:23

Hi Chris, thank YOU for sharing. Ah, it must have been bittersweet to attend both night's, honouring Stephanie's love of dancing, the 1st one without her being there, as well as it being geared around Stephanie. Very nice that your daughter and 3 of Mike's nieces were dancing, I know Stephanie would have wanted that too. Good for Mike, giving a Speech he prepared himself, and what a terrific way to honour Stephanie and her love of dancing, by establishing a Scholarship in her name to help other's, yes, Stephanie is definitely proud of her Dad, as are you and the rest of the family, :-) Must have been emotional, but Mike and you got through it alright from what you say, bravo, couldn't have been easy!
Much love & Angel Hugs,

5/23/2004 15:34

Hi Chris. What an emotional site, Yes I am sure that Stephanie was there dancing also and enjoying, and feling very proud of her dad and her step mother, so glad you have help of your daughters and the neices, ay my sister, that must have being a great day, and also imagine you tow are doing something for Stephanie, a Scholarship, yes Angels want to keep on helping others and now you an Mike are doing something great, oh, Stephanie is having a party tony for all our Angel kids, I am sure, they are celebrating. Love you my sister, thanks for sharing and please do keep in touch, I can imagine Solange dancing at the party and that feels good. Thank you and God Bless you. Selva

5/24/2004 09:32

Good Morning Angel Moms! It feels great to back posting again! These old hands have been in therapy for several days, [doctor's orders]:( But, I had to stop by and thank you all for all of the birthday wishes. If I have your email address, you should have received [very early this morning]a thank you note that I placed at the bottom of a fwd page I rec'd from Sandy. I really liked the message on that page, Sandy. Thanks again for sharing it. :) Things are still a bit hectic here with all that's going on with Felecia. She underwent surgery last weekend for gaul stones. She still has little or no appetite. She is still on dialysis 3 times a week. We are hopeful that she will come through this latest attack on her system. Family and I are holding on to our faith; knowing that God has the final word where our dear Felecia is concerned. Still, ... It's hard. :(

Yes, today is my big day! I have a big To Do List, and it's past time for me to get started. I'd much rather just sit here and catch up on back posts, but duty calls. Time to go for my morning walk, [beautiful sunshiny day here], mail bills, go visit Felecia, check on Auntie, Pearl, and little Miss Ashley,:) prepare after school snacks for the grand kids, and lunch for hubby. THEN ... I get to go to the riverboat and enjoy playing the nickel slots! :) Papaw has volunteered to baby-sit the grand kids for a few hours. Can't get him near the boat! Ha-ha! But, he doesn't mind me going, ... As long as I don't overspend! :) With the cost of meds & the price of gas going up daily, I may have to give up my twice a month treat. But, not today! :) So, wish me luck, angel moms! With luck, I may come away with a nickel more than I play! :) I'd better get going if I'm gonna get everything done! Thanks again for the birthday wishes, and I'll try to play catch up on posting later tonight, UNLESS the family demands my undivided attention for the rest of the evening. :)
Much love & Angel Hugs to all,

5/24/2004 09:55

~ LOVE2U ~

The time has come ...
I must share with you
I can't do all the things
I desire to do

The things I speak of
I will pass on to you
When my work for God
On this earth is through

When God's work through me
Comes to an end ...
Please know in your heart
We will always be friends

For like love ~
True friendship never dies
I will watch over you
from heaven on high

So if all of a sudden
you don't hear from me
Please know that our Lord
has set me free

To continue His work
from places on high
God's work through "you"
will continue long after I die

When it happens ...
And to all it someday will
My unconditional loving spirit
you will always feel

For I will surround you
with love, angel hugs and care
And you know I'LL "storm heaven"
With heavenly prayers!

As I stroll around heaven
I will imagine you there ...
Still strong in your faith
And in God's loving care

Until such time that your work is through ...
Because both God and I ...
And our precious Guardian Angels
Will be depending on you

Then ...

In the company of Angels ...
I will ask God to keep you in His care
And when your work on earth is finished
We all will be waiting there!

For like unconditional love ...
True friendship never dies
I promise to watch over you
from beyond the skies

I will send a few signs
As angels often do
When it happens...
Just smile and say --

Ah! ... My sisters,
That's ... ~ LOVE2U! ~

Verna R. Clay

5/24/2004 21:39

Our dear Miss V, I hope your special day was a wonderful one, by now I hope you're at the Casino winning a lot more than the odd nickle or two, :-) you deserve a break and some fun on this day, you're always so busy looking after your family, today is a ME day for you, take advantage of it, you've earned it in more way's than one!
Just like Stevie, I'm still believin' for Felicia Kaye, send her our love and prayers, and you know you're always in our's! Happy Birthday Miss V, and puh-leeze share your secret with us, ha, ha!
Ah, what a touching poem, right from your heart, I love it, but you're making me cry, cut that out now, you're going to outlast us all, :-)
And as good as you've been lately, I really hope you had a tiny piece of cake, :-)
Lots of love & Birthday Wishes,

5/25/2004 14:57

Beliefnet's Prayer of the Day

Prayer for Those Who Mourn

Bless those who mourn, eternal God,
with the comfort of your love
that they may face each new day with hope
and the certainty that nothing can destroy
the good that has been given. May their memories become joyful,
their days enriched with friendship,
and their lives encircled by your love.

- Vienna Cobb Anderson

5/25/2004 19:40

Hi my dear sister Miss V. Well I wish that you have your Me Day like our dear Sandy said, did you win? if you did please give my grandson a dollar , juts to spend it on whatever he wants no orders from mom or grandma, did you have a little piece of cake? I am impressed, you are taking so good care of yourself! that is great news. You also made me cry with your beautiful poem, but no way, we (and I mean we all) still need you around, you are an inspiring (did I spelled right) person in our life. I need you very much, so does your family, you are so blessed to have such a beautiful family. You know our prayers are with Felecia and I am sure you know that God listens to our prayers, to be honest, He owes us, maybe I am wrong but when I am angry I think so. Love you my dear sister. Selva

5/26/2004 00:33

Ah, my sisters, I don't plan on going anywhere soon! [I hope!]:) Like you,I will be here praying for all who have lost a precious and beloved child, for as long as God allows me to. And now that I'm trying to take better care of myself with diet and exercise, and by going to bed a little earlier, I hope God will allow me to stay around for a while longer. :) So, keep sending up those prayers, will ya? Ha-ha!

Sandy, about my secret: It's easy! Just keep sending the same old "younger" photo of yourself to others ... over and over again! Ha-ha! That way, you never grow old [in their eyes]! Ha-ha! No way is that me today! That photo was taken a few years before I retired to put in our school year book. Actually, I was in my late forties or early fifties, I think ... can't remember the year, but I can tell you, that's not how I look today! :( Not that it was that good. Ha-ha! But, it was "me" at that time in my life, and the most recent I have on disks. I have some more recent snapshots, but it is so difficult to get the kids to take time to put them on disks for me to share! Maybe now that school is almost out, my Rue will have more time to do some of them for me to share. Then, you will say, ... WOW! Miss V. sure did age fast! Ha-ha! Remember, ... I retired in May of 1999! So, when I update my picture file, expect to see a much "older & heavier" Miss V. Ha-ha! And, ... I'm
STILL waiting for you to send a photo! I think it's a great way for us to meet finally. I'm thinking of doing an Angel Mom scrapbook! So far, I have photos of Selva, Cindy, Lisa, and Debby; I think. Of course, I gotta find them in my files. And, I also have one of our dear Angela, and the one of our only angel dad, Angelo. So, come on, our Chief Angel Mom, ... As the youngsters say: Come on with it! :) It may be the only sure way we will get together in this world. My hubby just bought himself one of those video cameras; so if there is a way to do it, I may send some VClay "live," with a grandma dance, and a fun message for all angel moms! So, come on Sandy & angel moms, ... Let's have that Angel Mom's photo reunion! :) For any angel mom who is age shy, ... Heck, just follow Miss V's lead, and send an ageless photo! Ha-ha! Right Sandy? :)

Selva, ... Yes, I did win a few nickels, and I promise to give our grandson a treat. You would be so proud of him; He scored above the state level on all of his end of school tests! I will have Cheryl make copies of his test results to send to you as soon as she closes out the school year. The kids get out tomorrow, and teachers last day is Thursday. It is a very busy time for her right now, but I'll send his scores ASAP. I just saw them today, and Cheryl said he could hardly wait to show me. So, it's Taco treat time this weekend. :)

God bless all angel moms, & I pray that He will give you His peace that passes all understanding! Always know that we are here for you, and each other! Thanks again for praying for me, Felecia, and our family! She had an OK day today. Little Ashley is so excited about going to summer school, [Actually, it's still pre-school, called Head Start]:) But, she will begin real school [grade K],this Fall. This evening I called my sister, [her grandma], to see if it was ok to come get her to play with Antone' and Steven, [after school]. My sister said Ashley wanted to wait at the door for me! :) She wanted to show me her new back pack her grandma bought for her! Boy, ... If only they stay that excited about going to school as they are in the beginning years! :)

Love & Angel Hugs to all,

5/26/2004 00:47

Dear Marci, ~ Sorry I haven't answered your email. I've been on the go a lot helping out with our Felecia. About the page I sent, ...You're quite welcome! We need to be aware of the service stations in our areas that have the lowest gas prices! Right now, our cheapest price is 1.89 a gallon as of today! If this keeps up, I think I'll start walking a lot more, taking short trips, or staying home! Ha-ha!
Love & Angel Hugs,

5/26/2004 15:55

So THAT'S the secret, our dear Miss V!
Ha, Ha, so....if I sent one when I was say, oh, 18, and then sent a present day one, kind of like a 'before' and 'after', :-) hm, I don't just may scare all of you, ha, ha!!
Yes, I've got a pic of you, Selva, Ang, but I can't send one, I don't have a Scanner, whew! :-) It's a terrific idea though, pic's of us all, we can 'meet' each other in this way! So, if I ever get a Scanner?? I'll send all a pic! Oh, I'd love to see a Video with you doing the Grandma dance, :-)
Glad you had a terrific Birthday, and did come home with more nickel's, a great way to cap off your special ME day!
Much love & Angel Hugs,

5/26/2004 19:33

Ok lets do a family non profit org. I can do that. This ways we will take care of one another. As a matter of fact, I have a corp that the name of it its Make your dream come true, or something like that, I have to check with my corps, but I will welcom ideas of how can we make that corp come true. I will put the Corp. so now help me to make it "helpful" Love you my sisters, and please post on it. Lets make ourself useful> Love Selva (excuse my spelling)

5/26/2004 22:54

Hi my dear sister, that sound's like a great idea, leave it to you to come up with an Angel project, :-) I'm all for it, you're the Head CEO of this one, our Angel Chief, so tell me more about it, and how I can help!
Love you back, Sandy

5/27/2004 05:28

The following poem is a heartfelt tribute from all angel moms to all our beloved guardian angels on their very special day. Today is Shane's birthday!!! Happy Birthday, Shane! :)
A Heavenly Birthday Wish

For Shane

On this your Heavenly Birthday
A special wish I send
To cheer you as you celebrate
With all your heavenly friends

My wish for you is happiness
Of a very special kind
The kind that goes straight to your heart
As I send it straight from mine

I know you miss your Moma
Your Moma misses you too
But Angel Moms still need her here ...
She still has work to do

Our Lord gives her words of compassion
Through her, many hearts are healed
The loss of a child has a grief all it's own ...
Your Moma knows how we feel!

Though she longs to be there with you
To help you celebrate
God knows Angel Moms still need her here ...
So for now ... you'll have to wait

I know this might sound selfish
But please try to understand
We just can't walk this road alone
We need someone to hold our hand

Your Moma will be there is spirit today ...
Please know, ... You're never far apart
For she carries fond memories she has of you ...
Forever in her heart!

Written by: Verna R. Clay

In loving memory of Shane Whalen

"Happy Birthday" Shane!

May 27, 2004

5/27/2004 09:19

Dear Sandy, ~ I know this is a very special day for you and family. I pray that God will grant you all the peace and love and compassion for which we all pray. Please spend your day in whatever way that brings you comfort, and peace of mind. If the tears come, let them! Remember, it's OK! We will check in throughout the day just in case someone has a special prayer request. So don't worry about posting today! Please know our love and prayers are with you throughout this very special day.
Much love, and tender Angel Hugs,

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