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Shane Whalen
This Prayer Circle is Dedicated to my son Shane Whalen Who Passed Away On March 15, 1999 at the Age of 24, & All Other Children


Start a prayer circle for bereaved parents who have lost a child.


There are many of us out there who have lost a child, and it is devastating. It changes the outlook on life, plunges you into a depression, and you think that the feelings and thoughts you have nobody else could possibly relate to. I think a prayer circle for bereaved parents would only benefit us and help us on our journey of grief. This Circle is one of Love, where a Grieving Parent can safely come to for Prayers, and to talk about their feelings.

 
Shaner -10/14/2000
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Read Prayers.


godslove4u
3/17/2004 12:22

I'm new to this site but,i have felt all of your prayers without even saying a word. I have also lost a lovley little girl, she is 7yrs old and i miss her more and more every day. I lost my baby and her father to an atv accident on sept212003. i find it hard to cope with the pain and feeling that i have. i know that she and her father are in a better place with the lord, but that still does not make me not want them to be here on earth to see their smiling face, or to hear that sweet laughing voices. the holidays have been so different and hard i hardly feel like doing the things that i use to do. her fathers b-day was nov 26,2003 that was hard to have just had the funerl and turn around and his b-day was here. We were not married but we were still good friends.I do have 2 other lovely children and a wonderful husband here to and that brings me joy to see them every day helping and loving. Now i am dealing with her b-day which is coming up on 3-29. so please pray for me and my family that we will all continue to be strong in the lord, and i will pray the blood of jesus over everyone of your families that the lord will always keep you and supply you need.

Love to all my sisters in christ.


shaner
3/17/2004 15:23

Hello dear godslove4u, a very big, warm welcome to the Circle, I'm just very sorry for the reason why you're here, God love you. All of us here have experienced the nightmare of every Parent, losing one of our beloved children and we understand your pain. Losing a child is the worst pain for a Mom, Dad to ever go through. It change's your life, your world, upside down, we struggle with so many, many feelings and questions, it's far more complex than we can ever explain to other's who thankfully haven't experienced this loss. Our mind's tell us that our children are in a much better place, enjoying a life that we can only imagine this side of the veil, but our heart's cry out otherwise, we miss them so, so much in our lives. Your feelings are very normal dear one, how could you not miss your precious baby, only 7 year's old and her Dad too, he was also a big part of your life. I know it must have been devastating for you when you received the word that both of them had passed on due to the unfortunate accident. I know the Holidays had to be very difficult for you to get through, this was your first one without your precious little daughter there with all of you. You've just recently lost your baby, and we all know how fresh and raw your pain, grief is right now, God love you. We all share in your pain with you here, at this Circle of Love as we call it. Our prayers and love are with you right now, and we'll pray for your daughter's upcoming Birthday, these special days are always so hard on us all. This is her 1st Birthday you'll be experiencing without her physically being there, but she's locked forever in your heart, our prayers, love and support will be with you now and on her Birthday. What is your daughter's name? I'm so happy for you that you have a loving, supportive husband and your other children that bring you so much joy. You'll only find support, love, understanding, compassion and never any judging here, so I hope you'll post back, you can freely let out your feelings here and know they will be honored. I'm so sorry for your loss, as well as her Dad, you're in good company here, we share your pain. And thank you for your own prayers for us, we truly appreciate and need them.
Love, prayers & Angel Hugs,
Sandy


SELVAM
3/17/2004 19:46

Hi Godlove4you. Again you are so welcome here in this Circle of Love, we all know about your pain, I lost my only daughter Aug 15 2002, and her father died on June 2000, so I know about your pain, we all do, I was also divorced from Solange's father and we did have a good comunication because of our daughter, please feel free to post in our Circle of Love, we all understand this "PAIN", it is so hard that only if you live through it, you can understand, You will find understanding, forgivenes, no judgement, and so much love, so please if you want, keep on posting here, we will give you love, understanding and prayers. Love Selva


ALEXZNANGEL
3/18/2004 03:16

Hello AngelMoms and Dad,
I am feeling a bit better. My husband actually let me out of my room today. Our church got together to see "The Passion". What a powerful movie! It is as graphic as people say, but I found it no more graphic than what I always imagined our Lord's torture and death to be. It was hard to see, but harder still was the moments in the film that showed the relationship between Mary and Jesus. How she suffered seeing her Son suffer and die. Those scenes went straight to my heart. As much as this movie had been talked about and critiqued, I never read or heard anything about what an important part their relationship played in the movie. How I anguished for our Holy Mother.
I want to let all of you know that I finally relented and let my son, Weston get his license Monday. That was so hard; a tremendous step in faith for me. I am trying to be a big girl about it but deep down I am very scared. God Bless Weston for putting up with his nuerotic momma for 5 months.
godslove4u,
Welcome to our circle. I am so glad you posted. I lost my 20 year old son, Alex in an automobile accident in May. I know the pain you are feeling; sometimes it is just unspeakable. But here at this circle it is speakable. We walk where you walk. We cry when you cry; smile when you smile; and when you think you have lost your mind and will never find your way back...you have a bunch of AngelMoms that will lift you up in prayer. My prayers are with you.
Selva,
Everytime I see a post from you "hermana latina" it is an answered prayer!! Thank you Jesus!!
Debby,
TWINS!!!!!I am so happy for you!! Maybe we can have a cyber-shower :)
Marci,
I'm thinking about you...hope to hear from you soon.
God bless my AngelFamily
Susan


shaner
3/18/2004 08:41

Hi our dear Susan! So glad you're feeling a little better, it really knocked you for a loop, but hurray, you're out of the bedroom, :-). Isn't it a powerful Movie? My hubby and I went to see it a couple of week's ago, and it had a deep, prfound affect on me.
I quietly wept as I watched what He went through for us, and kept saying "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, Lord". Yes, the scene's with Our Blessed Mother in it (I'm RC) were so tender, so sad, any grieving Mom could identify strongly watching what she went through also. We're going back to see it a second time, hopefully the crowds have died down a little.
Oh Susan, that's a big step for you, letting Weston get his driver's license! No, you're not neurotic dear AngelMom, we always get a little overprotective with our other children, if the unthinkable can happen to one of our children, there's always the nagging thought in the back of our head's that it may happen again, I think I drove my Chris crazy too, and he was 28 when Shane passed away! Weston must be overjoyed, now he can drive his Momma around, :-). You'll slowly feel more relaxed about it as time goes on, so try not to worry TOO much. Hm, a cyber-shower for our Deb, I never thought of that, :-). So happy you're feeling a little better, it took a while, but you're on the mend now,
Much love, prayers, & Angel Hugs,
Sandy


smile713
3/18/2004 12:34

stephanie's 6 month heaven day is approching 3/25/04, please pray for us, on this day. Mike is already tring to prepare for another hard day. chris


shaner
3/18/2004 14:37

Hello dear AngelMom Chris, it's been a while since we've heard from you, how are you and Mike doing? Oh yes, we all know difficult these special day's are, and our thought's, love and prayers are with you and Mike, especially on his daughter's upcoming birthday, blessings and peace to you both,
Much love & Angel Hugs,
Sandy


godslove4u
3/18/2004 20:24

hello all my brothers and sister in christ, I really appriciate every kind word and prayers that you all have said for me and my family. sandy, selva, and susan thank you from the bottom of my heart. I would like to send a special pray out for each and every one of you and you families. To my father who sits high and looks low i would just first want to say thank you Lord for this day to see your beautiful world once again, Lord please shower my new friends with the love and support that each one of them need, Lord I just lift your name up high for all the blessing that you have given us and the ones that we have not recieved yet. Lord if you never do another thing for us you have done more than could ever be amagined from giving your only begotton son, to laying your life down for all of our sins and for this i just want to say that you. Lord i send a special pray for chris and her family as they reach the 6 months of heaven for their daughter stephanie. Lord I pray that you wrap your loving arms of protection around them and let them know that you and lord of lord and king or king and that all of our help comes from the Lord Jesus Christ. Jesus said" I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." john16:33. He pay the price for all of our pains and sorrow. Amen. just remember his eyes are on the sparrow.

Love, Ebony
p.s my daughter name is Aislanique and her fathers name is David.


shaner
3/18/2004 23:03

Hi dear AngelMom Ebony, I'm so happy you posted back, what a heartfelt prayer for all, thank you for posting it! That was so sweet of you to pray for Chris and Mike too, I know they'll appreciate it so much, Stephanie's 6th Month Heaven Date is coming up too, and you know how hard it is yourself, God love you. What a pretty name for your precious daughter, Aislanique, it has a French sound to it, :-) I pray you have some moments of peace, I know your heart is aching right now, but we're all here for you, you and your dear family are in our prayers and love, may God bless you dear Mother of Aislanique and lean heavily on Him for strength,
Much love & Angel Hugs,
Sandy
p.s. Thank's also for letting us know her dear Dad's name too.


shaner
3/18/2004 23:57

Hello AngelMoms and Dad's, here's another poem I came across, it say's a lot also,

Go ahead and mention my child,
The one that died you know.
Don't worry about hurting me further,
The depth of my pain doesn't show.
Don't worry about making me cry,
I'm already crying inside.
Help me to heal by releasing
the tears that I try to hide.
I'm hurt when you just keep silent,
Pretending they don't exist.
I'd rather you mention my child,
Knowing that they have been missed.
You asked me how I was doing,
I say "pretty good" or "fine".
But healing is something ongoing,
I feel it will take a lifetime.
by Elizabeth Dent

Love and Prayers to all,
Sandy


shaner
3/19/2004 00:01

Dear Fayth3, our thoughts, love and prayers are with you today, your precious daughter's birthday.
Love & Angel Hugs,
Sandy


sharonleemary05
3/19/2004 00:01

Dear Angel Moms & Dads,I don't have time to really post tonight,it midnight and I have to sick children,but I wanted to share this with you,a speical friend sent this to me,its beautiful,I thought you might like to see it.Go to www.theinterviewwithGod.com
Let me know what you think,I felt such peace & love.
Love & Hugs
Sharonlee


shaner
3/19/2004 13:21

Hi our dear Sharon Lee, I KNOW, I've viewed it a couple of time's now and it's like a loving balm for the soul, did you also view the 'Interview with Jesus' one? They're both very loving and touching. Oh, sorry the girl's are sick, hope it's not complication's from the accident! Write back (when you have the time) and let us know how they are and you too!
Much love & Angel Hugs,
Sandy


shaner
3/19/2004 13:31

Hi dear AngelMoms, Dad's,
This is off-topic but I really need some help - is there anyone here of the Baptist faith? I have to send someone a gift and I don't want to make a religious faux pas! I'd be very grateful for any help, my e-mail address is sewhalen@yahoo.com Thank you so much!
Much love & Angel Hugs,
Sandy


nomondenyero
3/20/2004 02:13

Dear God Almighty

Your child is going though hadship of losing a child. You are the one who gives and the one who takes bu as parents we tend to lose focus in our faith when it comes to the beautiful flowers (our children) You gave us. Give us all parents the guidance of monitoring ans raising our kids in your faith and help us teach them right from wrong. You sacrifised Your only son so tha all the sinners who repent could be saved. Heal then Mighty Father the bleeding hearts of all aprents who lost their children and give your undying Love and support to continue following your sons footseps. Send your holy angels with special senses of Peace to Shane, let them show him the Love you have for him. With all the Glory and the Power we thank you Oh Lord, Amen.


nomondenyero
3/20/2004 02:33

On the 26th o f March 2001 I was one of the happiest women to be giving birth to two beautiful children, twins a boy and a girl but less than an hour or so after giving the Birth the Nursing Sister came to tell me that one of the twins could not make it, they had tried everything they could But God had other plans so my little boy died. I was numb, cold and confused and the olny question I had in my mind is "How can God do something so terrible to me? How could he take my child away from me before I could even get to know him? As the time went by I had to let go of the anger but it is difficult. Next week Friday it will be 3 years but I still cannot make birthday celebrations for my daughter on the 26 as I feel the most terrible pain of watching her grow alone when she should have her brother growing up with her. I cannot let go the pain does not diminish it just grows as the years goes by. My little girl's birthday should be one of my happiest days in life but it turns to be the sadest of them all. to those parents who lost their children after so many years of watching them grow up pray to God for help.


nomondenyero
3/20/2004 04:36

BE KIND WITH YOUR WORDS
BE FAITHFUL WITH YOUR DEALINGS
BE TRUE IN YOUR LIFE
BE A FRIEND TO THE LONELY
BE GENEROUS TO THE NEEDY
BE BRAVE IN MISFORTUNE
BE POSITIVE AND LOVING
BE HELPFUL TO HUMANITY
BE DETERMINED TO SUCCEED
BE USEFUL WITH YOUR LIFE
BE GRATEFUL AND APPRECIATIVE,
AND TRUST IN GOD ALMIGHTY


HEALTH IS A FORTUNATE GIFT
COMMITMENT THE GREATES WEALTH
FAITHFULNESS THE GREATEST RELATIONSHIP
**************************************
SMILE, GOD LOVES YOU
KEEP ON SMILING
AND OTHERS WILL LOVE YOU TOO
***************************************
EXCELLENCE COMES FROM
GOOD HABITS
**************************************
HAVE SOME HUMOUR


1. MAINTAIN FAMILY TIES
2.SHOW LOVE &COMPASSION TO FAMILY
3.TEACH YOUR CHILDREN GOOD MANNERS AND RESPECT
4.DON’T JUDGE ANYBODY
5.MOTHERS ARE ANGELS IN THE MAKING
6.FATHERS ARE WORTH A 1000 HEADMASTERS
7.CHILDREN ARE FLOWERS IN THE MAKING
8.RECIPE FOR BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN
“BE A BEAUTIFUL PARENT”
MY PRAYERS ARE WITH EVERY PARENT WHO GOES THROUGH THE PAIN OF LOSNG A CHILD OR A FAMILY MEMBER/ FRIENDS


shaner
3/20/2004 22:01

Hello nomondenyero, a very warm welcome to the Circle! I love your analogy of our children being flowers in our live's, they bloom with our love, and their 'aroma', essence fill's our live's with their sweetest of fragrances. I'm so very sorry that you lost your tiny boy, when you gave birth to your twins. I know it must have been so devastating to hear the sad new's on what should have been one of the happiest day's of your life. You carrried both of these precious babies underneath your heart for nine months, now you'll carry your beloved son forever in your heart. Sweetie, what you experienced, the shock, numbness, the anger, all of us here at the Circle know about it, and can relate strongly to how you felt and are still feeling. It is, without a doubt, the worst pain we Parents will ever go through, a piece of your heart went with your little boy, God love you. I'm happy that you're finally letting go of the anger, as I said, it's very normal to feel it, but you've managed to get through it with time and leaning heavily on God now for His love to help overcome it. Do you have support around you, family, friends that you can talk to, that could possibly help you with your daughter's birthday next week? This is too hard a road to go down alone, is there a Support Group near where you live for Mom's who've lost a child, baby, you'd be surrounded by other's who've gone through the same awful experience and are still going through it, there's strength in numbers.
You can always, always post here, we've all lost children of varying ages and we all share in your pain and each other's here at this Circle of Love. This is a very safe haven to let your feeling's out, all of us as I said know the heartache of losing one of our precious children, and here you'll only receive love, support, understanding, prayers and never any judging. Our prayers will be with you next week, to help you deal with your precious daughter's birthday, and the loss you feel, the void, without her little brother being there too. I love what you wrote after your Post, :-) it's so affirming and true. God bless you dear AngelMom, please post back anytime, our love and prayers are with you,
Love & lots of tender Angel Hugs,
Sandy


shaner
3/21/2004 00:20

Dear Sharon Lee and All,
Here's another one you may enjoy, Father's Love Letter click on link


LisaLou862
3/21/2004 12:32

Gosh, Sandy, that is the most heart touching thing I have seen a quite a while (beside the movie). I cried and cried through it. It really moved me. Thanks for sharing it.
Hello Angel Moms and Dads,
I apologize for not posting in such a long time. I have been reading all the posts but just couldn't bring myself to post.... Wow, Deb! Twins! That is great. I am so so happy for you.
Selva and Verna,
Thanks for continuing to send me emails and cards. I have been feeling really disconnected to everything lately and it brightens my day when I receive them.
Hi to the new angel moms! I am truly sorry for the reason that you have found this site, but hope you will find comfort and understanding here. Please know that you can post anything here and you will not be judged or looked down upon. We all understand what you are feeling and living through. It is the most gut wrenching, heartbreaking thing a mom could ever experience. Sometimes you feel like you can't go on another minute but somehow God helps you through. God and these women....
God Bless you all, and peace find you.
Love,
Lisa


shaner
3/21/2004 14:07

Hello my dear Lisa Lou! I know, I love it too, it's so personal to you when you view it and read what God has to say to us! You're still going through a tough time my friend, I know, sometime's it's difficult to post when you're feeling that way, BUT we want to know how you're doing!! Gee, don't you like my e-mails and Cards - I'm just teasing you, :-) I love the one's you send me, they brighten my day too, and some of them are hilarious, :-)
Hope you're still going to Compassionate Friends, this is so hard, isn't it. You know you always have us, our love and prayers are always with you, you know that. Praying for better days for you dear Lisa,
Much love & Angel Hugs,
Sandy


LisaLou862
3/22/2004 10:58

Oh Gosh Sandy, I'm sorry, of course I love your emails and cards too! lol I sent you one this morning that I thought was pretty funny, you will have to let me know if you liked it.... Yes, I am still going to Compassionate Friends, but you know they only meet once a month. Matter of fact, I agreed to be the new treasurer of our local chapter.
Christopher is returning home today from a spring break trip in Germany. I can't wait to see him. It has only been 10 days but it feels like a month since I've seen him. I cleaned his room and changed his sheets, etc. for him yesterday. I'm acting like he is a little kid again, but I am really excited to have him home. I talked to him on Saturday and he sounded really tired and kinda down, he said he was ready to come home too. I know whenever I go on vacation somewhere it feels so good to get back home. But afer a few days of being home you are ready to go again! lol
I know this was a terrific experience for him. I have never been out of the states. Maybe someday.....
Saturday night I went to play bingo with a friend of mine and a boy walked in that reminded me of Aaron so much is was uncanny. I just couldn't hold back the emotions. I just busted into tears and just sobbed, I couldn't catch my breath. That is the first time that has happened to me. I have never been not able to control myself in public. I just kept staring at him all night. He had so many of the same mannerisms and everything as Aaron. I was trying not to let him see me looking at him, he probably thought I was a wacked old lady...lol but I just couldn't help it. He even smoked his cigarrette like Aaron. Oh, what I wouldn't give for that to have really been him. Also, the other day I drove up to my parents house to visit. I had to drive right by the accident site and I was just overcome with emotions again. I got mad and screamed and punched the steering wheel. These are things that are firsts for me. Is this normal? I feel like I don't fit in anywhere anymore. Even with my parents and family. The relationships feel strained. Is anybody else going through this?
God Bless You All,
Lisa


shaner
3/22/2004 16:26

I know my dear friend, as I said, I was just teasing you - you should know by now I'm 'the wacky one', lol! YES, I roared over your fwd., so from here on I'm letting them out, no if's and's or but's, ha, ha!
Oh I didn't know they only met once a month, that is a rather a long time to go, congrat's to you for being their Treasurer!! Oh gosh yes, I thought he was home by now, you'll be one happy Mom to have him back again! I really hope he had a terrific time, but he's probably as anxious now to get back home as you are, 10 day's is a long time for him too, you'll have to let us know what he thought about his trip! No, you're not treating him like a little boy, you're just happy to have him coming back home - I used to do the same for Chris and Shane - "Would you PLEASE pick up your towels in the bathroom, and your sock's in the living room?" They'd always say, uh, sure Mom, we'll get to it, well, they didn't get to it fast enough for me, so I ended up doing it myself, :-). Oh to be able to say that again.
Come to Canada! No, we don't live in igloo's or eat whale blubber, ha, ha!
Oh, dear Lisa, no wonder you broke down, he reminded you SO much of your Aaron, resembling him so much, same mannerism's, I probably wouldn't have been able to hold it back either, there it was, right in your face so to speak, and it had to bring up so much pain missing your Aaron so, so much. The pain hit's so hard at time's like this, it's almost physical, you feel as though you've been hit in the chest, and can't breathe. Much the same as when you passed his accident scene, it doesn't feel fair, it's perfectly OK to get angry, you don't want to look at the spot that took Aaron's life, you just want Aaron back, I think every Mom here know's what that feel's like, especially you Mom's who've lost your child to a vehicle accident. I didn't lose Shane to a car accident, but there are still some place's that are painful to go too, and generally I still stay away from them. As for feeling disconnected, I know I certainly experienced it, and in some case's still do - the death of one of our children change's us forever, the Sandy, Lisa, etc. that existed before losing our child no longer exist's in some way's and we feel that sense of disconnection not only with friends, but with family member's too. Eventually it became easier for me, I lost some friends along the way, they didn't know how to deal with the 'new me', and I myself came to an inner understanding with my own family. Hopefully some other Mom's will post who are feeling the same. I can only say that time is your best friend right now, you're still just in your 2nd year, and slowly over time I found that some thing's became easier to deal with. You're letting your emotions, feelings out, and that's a good thing! Praying for you my dear Lisa Lou, and you know you're in my heart,
Much love & Angel Hugs galore,
Sandy


shaner
3/22/2004 21:30

Hope for the Day


When you’re troubled, it’s difficult to keep on trusting
that things will all work out. It is much easier to abandon
trust and allow fear and worry to cloud your every
thought. The problem with anxious thoughts, though,
is that they lead us to a place where we can never find
peace.

Sometimes we face problems that could easily be called
unsolvable. There are no human answers that satisfy us.
We question “why” so many tragic circumstances have
come into our life. We need answers. We want answers.
But, there is no worldly wisdom that gives comfort.

If you are looking at difficulties and sufferings that
seem too much for you to bear, remember that you have
a sovereign, perfect God that you can trust. He is in
control, and He will never leave you alone in your pain.
Watch the ocean waves as they roll up to the shore. The
steady rhythm is a constant reminder of God’s awesome
power and everlasting presence. He is always there ready
to give comfort and rest.

Trust the One who made the heavens. Believe in the
promises of the One who painted the sky with the rainbow.
Draw near to the One who has placed daily hope deep
within your heart. –Clara Hinton

“When our need is the greatest, God is the closest.” –C. Hinton

“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted, and saves those
who are crushed in spirit.” --Psalm 34:18

From Silent Grief,

Much love & Angel Hugs to all,
Sandy

 
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