Prayer Circles

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Shane Whalen
This Prayer Circle is Dedicated to my son Shane Whalen Who Passed Away On March 15, 1999 at the Age of 24, & All Other Children

Start a prayer circle for bereaved parents who have lost a child.

There are many of us out there who have lost a child, and it is devastating. It changes the outlook on life, plunges you into a depression, and you think that the feelings and thoughts you have nobody else could possibly relate to. I think a prayer circle for bereaved parents would only benefit us and help us on our journey of grief. This Circle is one of Love, where a Grieving Parent can safely come to for Prayers, and to talk about their feelings.

Shaner -10/14/2000
send to a friend

Read Prayers.

9/14/2003 20:29

Hi dear Deb, nice to hear from you, I figured you were busy getting settled back into your routine of work and school, but we're so happy you posted!!
Hey, that's so terrific about you and your friend, I can tell how happy you are about it, and yep, good thing you kept your same username!! Have a good week ahead, but don't forget about us, :), we want to hear from you too,
Lots of love & Angel Hugs,

9/15/2003 07:56

Hello to all you angel moms. I have been in real bad valley days. I don't believe I will ever get out of them. I have been sitting around crying and wanting to know why this had to happen. I miss my dear Nicholas more and more everyday. I don't have much support here at home with my husband, he just feels that everything should be back to normal. He told me to go to Hell yesterday after we got into a big argument. I told him he doesn't have to tell me to go to Hell I am already there, I have been there ever since my Nicholas has died. I don't know if I will make it or not. I am going to visit my sister in Flordia this week, I will be gone from Sept. 17 until Sept. 22. I will try to check in while I am in Flordia. I want to say thanks to all you angel moms who are out there and know what I am going through. If it wasn't for you I don't know who I would talk to. I am not a very outgoing person and I don't like anyone not seeing me in control. Lots of love and hugs to all.

9/15/2003 19:55

Hi my sister Deb, its so nice to hear from you again, Oh yes, I can imagine you going back to work with all your little angels, remeber we are still here for you, and we are very proud of the work that you are doing, don't worry we are still storming Heaven for you and Skyla, just keep pressing On, You are in our prayers, and please keep us post , remember you are part of the family and we miss you. I will post again because our dear Angel Mom Sandy needs a little extra prayers, so please keep in touch. Love you my sister. Selva

9/15/2003 20:02

Hi Billie. I am sorry you are having bad times with your husband, but guess what, that its part of the process, see we all grieve in a different way, and men try to hide their feelings, but they are still hurting a lot, But I know that things can not ever go back to normal, give yourself a little time, you need to grieve for your son, you have every right to do so, so if you are coming to Florida, that its great, both of you need to grieve in a diferent way, by the way I live in Fla, Miami, so if you will be coming here and you want to get together I will be more than happy to meet you and help you too. If you are coming anywhere near Miami, please let me know, and we will help each other in this awful grief. If you click on my name , you will have my e mail address, remember, you are not alone, you have a great Circle of Love to help you and we all understand. So please let me know, my friend, we are all willing to help you. Love Selva

9/15/2003 20:06

Hi all my Angel Moms. Our dear sister Sandy needs us. Her nephew was called to Heaven today, so if you please all join me to storm Heaven for Sandy and her family, specially her nephew's parents. Lets storm Heaven for her and her family. In the name of our Lord, I pray to give Sandy and all her family the strenght to bear this loss. May Jesus will be there for him nad take him into his lovely arms and forgivenes. Amen Selva

9/15/2003 22:07

hello my sweet sister angelmoms..Oh! how I have missed you all...yes I have been off line for nearly a month and a half....all my thoughts and prayers were with you all...oh goodness there is so much that has been going on..I will try another day to post all the "happennings"...Ron and I have moved.He has finally moved us out in the "boonnies"..He is happy out here..I yet still do not feel "at home".IT"S TOOOOOOO QUITE OUT HERE!!!!!!hehehehe anyway....As I have tried for the past TWO hours to catch up on post(taking much longer cause I have no DSL out here):( I have to use dialup....ughhhhhh.anyway.Thepost I did get to read..especially the "new moms". my heart ached and cried with them..For we all know how they feel....As you all know my Matthew, who was 5 months shy of his 16th birthday.was called home on June 8th,2003.I miss him still with all my heart and soul..There are days when I don't even want to get up out of bed....But the good Lord whispers in his most loving voice "Get up Eva..For there is still work I wish for you to do."And again I rise...With an anxious desire to go and be where he has me to go...Satan does try his best to get in my mind..IN YOUR FACE I say...hehee I don't remember who first told me that..was that you Donna?BUT it does work! I get this calm feeling...and it only confirms to me how wonderful my Jesus is!Right now I am on a mountain top feeling kinda wave.(maybe cause of the excitement of being back online) nope....GOD! God is good ...and he is merciful..and he is loving...and he is my comforter,whenvalley days seem they have no end...I love you all...and I lift you all up to the most High!May God continue to love you and bless you....for the newmomms...I am deeply sorry to hear of your loss...there are no words..only a sad feeling that comes over me...for I know how you feel....we allll know how you feel..please continue to come back to this site....if only for to just sit and read the post for an uplifting prayer to you and your family....Lord knows Heaven has been stormed many times for each and everyone of us...And he hears us...and he knows what we are going through...Just Hold on to Him.with all the strenght you can muster..again for those who don't Matthew age 15 was killed in a car wreck(passenger) car flipped..he was partially landed on top of him...died of chest injuries and head trauma....I like to keep believing Jesus senthis angels and took Matthew home and not suffered not one bit..I need to go....I have tied up the phone line long enough...I love you all....and I never once forgot to pray for you all while I was "away"...In His Care I Press On ....Eva

9/15/2003 22:10

Oh gosh.....the date I have on the post.of my son's could I have gotten that wrong? for that date will forever be in my mind....he was killed last year ..2002..I'm sorry Matthew....I love you son..and I miss you you,Mom

9/16/2003 07:22

Selvma, Hello, I will be in Winter Haven, Florida. That is in between Orlanda and Tampa. Thank you for your invitation to come see you in Miami, but I wont be anywhere close to there.
Lots of prayers and hugs to all.

9/16/2003 07:28

Hello to all the angel moms. I need some prayers. I am having a really bad time with the death of Nicholas. I no it has only been 73 days since my Nicholas went to heaven and everyone says I need time to grieve. I need this pain to go away, I can't even function. All I do all day is sit and read books about spirits and death and how we can communicate with our love ones. I haven't yet been able to dream or communicate with Nicholas at all. I feel that he doesn't want to come around me. I need to feel his presence and know that he is okay. Please pray for me and my family so we can continue on with our lifes. Lots of hugs and prayers to all.

9/16/2003 08:57

Dear Angel Moms, ~ Sandy's nephew passed yesterday. Please pray for Sandy & family. I hope this gets through this time. I keep getting knocked off line as soon as I click on submit. When I ran a test on my computer, it said the External loop failed, so I will check with the cable company to see what that means. :)
Love & Hugs,

9/16/2003 17:26

Dear Angel Moms,

I am expericing technical problems with my computer. I am typing this off line and will
try to use copy/paste to submit this. My son-in-law will come to check it for me after he
gets off work. If he can fix the problem, I will try to post later tonight. Selva and I
posted earlier to inform everyone that Sandyís nephew passed on yesterday. Letís
continue to keep our dear Sandy and her entire family in our heartfelt prayers. Also, I am
sorry to tell you that I received some stressful news this morning concerning one of my
sisters who lives in California. She had a stroke on Thursday, and was not found until Sunday. Her husband is deceased and she lived alone. So we are in the process of trying to get her home so we (my sister who lives here) and I, can take care of her. So, I am also asking for prayer for my sister, and our entire family. I will try very hard to get back to posting as soon as
possible. I hope I can get this posted before my computer cuts me off again and I lose
everything! If this goes through, I will try writing off line and then use cut and paste again.
Love & Hugs,

9/16/2003 18:46

Hi Billie, ~ I'm sorry you are having such a hard time. I wish there was some way I could ease your pain. Unfortunately, I can't, but what I can do is pray that God will ease your pain. The pain of losing a child is unlike any you have ever known. In those days, weeks, and months right after it happens, it's like you are living in a nightmare, only you are awake. I recall I went back and forth between accepting and not accepting that my Diane was gone forever. That's where you are in your grieving over your son, Nicholas' passing. When our children die, a part of us goes with that child. Having never experienced losing a child before, part of your mind is telling you that you can't go on, and the other part is trying to help you face your loss, but it is still something you cannot accept. So the confusion sets in and the loss of energy due to a lack of sleep and not eating right "if" at all. I am speaking from experience; My own, that is, but many moms have shared that they also went through these kind of stressful situations, and I can tell you it is a time that causes you to question your sanity. No parent wants to think about losing a child. We choose to not to think about even the possibility of having a child to die before we do. And, up until it happens to you, it was always something that happened to someone else's child. And even though your heart went out to that parent -- even people you didn't know, somehow you felt such compassion for that parent whose child had passed on. I know I always did. And, every time the though would try to enter my mind that one or both of my children might die before I did, I would start hyperventilating! The thought of it was too much to bear! Then, when I learned that my precious daughter had been killed, ... I actually tried to die. I literally begged God to let me die! And, got angry when it did not happen! I can't tell you how glad I am now that God didn't listen to me. The day finally arrived when I no longer wanted to die. Not only did I not want to die, I was so very glad to be able to reach out to newly bereaved parents like yourself, that I was praying and thanking God for using me to embrace those who really need to know that someone has felt what they are feeling and that eventually the pain settles in and is not so intense. Because I have been through it, I can tell you and the other newly bereaved moms that, and because you know I have survived losing a child, you will be more inclined to believe what I say. Not only will you survive, you will be given the opportunity to someday help other moms survive. In order for this to happen, however, first, you must allow yourself time to grieve. I know it seems too much to bear! But with prayer, all things are possible. And believe me, Billie, God hears all of our prayers. He also answers prayers, but in His time, not ours! God knows how much you love your Nicholas, and how much he love you. That love is eternal. He also knows how much time you need to grieve your loss! It is only human to want to get over it and stop hurting fast! However, the depth of that love bond between you and your child, will not allow it! Your life has been changed forever. You will always feel your loss, but the pain won't always be so hard to bear. The healing of your shattered heart will take a lot of time. But, the healing will eventually reach a point where you will once again be able to function, and feel a measure of joy. Now is the time for you to be gentle and work through your grief and pain! If you haven't talked with your doctor, please do so. Also your pastor. They may recommend counseling, and your doctor can give you meds to help you get through this valley time. I hope this helps to shed a little light on what it's been like for me and others, thereby, assuring you that it won't always hurt so bad.
Love and Angel Hugs,

9/16/2003 19:55

Ay my sister Verna, of course we will storm Heaven for your dear sister, I know what it will take, my mother had a stroke and then when my dad died she had several, I took her into my house when my dad passed on, I took care of her for 6 years, and she had little sckemias or whatever they cal it, mini strokes, but Thank God you have your sister's help, all I had was my half sister which it was not her mother, but the poor thing helped me somewhat and Solange who was only 13, so my dear sister my prayers will be with you all, and I really mean it. For sure I will keep on storming Heaven for you and your family. I am here for you my dear sister. Love Selva

9/16/2003 19:59

Eva, what a joy to see you posting again, my God don't be such a stranger, we all worry about you, Oh as far as I am concerned I wish I could live in the mountains, see I live in a very busy City which I do not like, but my dear sister, don't forget us, we always have you in mind, and by the way, could you send your e mail? I have tried (we all did) to send you e mails and they were returned, remember your sisters here in the Circle of Love, we always remember you. Love you my dear sister. Selva

9/16/2003 20:07

Hi Billie.Read Verna's post, she has been there a little longer than I, she has helped me so much, so listen to her advise, even if you come down to Fla, try to get into a computer and we will always be here for you, we are very new at this, and you are the newest, so we will keep on trying to help you, remember we are all here for the same reason, so we do understand "the pain", like no one else, we share the same feelings and the same pain. You are not alone, you have this Circle of Love and we are all here to help you anyway we know. Be easy on yourself my friend, this is it, there is no other pain that can compare to this. You have all you can take, but be careful, don't do any harm to yourself because for SURE Nicholas is still watching over you, and he wants to be proud of his mom in front of all our Angel Kids, he is part of the group now, and all of them are watching over us, they are all together and he is proud of his mom. Love you my sister. Selva

9/17/2003 20:02

God's purpose is not to destroy us, but to restore us. The enemy is the destroyer, but God has promised to restore the things the enemy has taken from our lives -- all the years of lost joy, all the times of frustration and defeat, all the moments of regret, all the pains of lost opportunities, all the hurt of broken relationships. God is building His kingdom within you -- a kingdom of joy, love, peace, righteousness, victory, redemption, and right relationships.

Never Forgotten ~ Always Loved ~
By: Roy Lessin

9/17/2003 21:11

Ay mi sister Verna, deep valley days you understand, first we lost one of our beloved co workers, monday Am, then yesterday one of our beloved co workers lost her husband (cancer) now one of our beloved co workers had her husband operated on today, brain cancer, then they called me from my pshycho, the insurance co will not pay any more of my theraphy for this year, I can not afford 250 or 200 or even $75 a week, so I will give it up, I am going to a workshop at Omega this weekend (which I am not sure) hurricane Isabel has made a mess. Anyway I will get back to you tomorrow. I am a mess. Love Selva

9/18/2003 09:49

Hello dear Angel Moms, we returned home late last night from Derek's Funeral, very, very sad, but I carried all your prayers, and good thoughts with me, and passed them along to Derek's Dad, Step-Mom and brother. He was cremated, and will be buried at a later date with his mother, who passed away when Derek was 12. He is now in the arms of Our dear Lord, and his earthly pain is over.
Before I awoke yesterday morning, I had a very unsettling dream, but SO real, I was experiencing the intense pain, the stinging pain, of losing Shane, it was like I was back at Square one again, crying, and crying and feeling that awful pain that some of you new Moms are experiencing right now. I've had 'Griefbursts' and Valley Days, but nothing as intense as the very real pain and tears I experienced in that dream. It could have been 'triggered' over Derek, or it could have been some pain that I hadn't let out yet, but it was very painful and I'm glad that it's over, left me feeling very unsettled all day long, it was so real.
Thank you my sister and dear Miss V for holding the fort down again, I just briefly came online now to let you know I'm back, and will post later to you all, thank you all so much for your love and prayers, they helped so much, and I love you all!
Much love & Angel Hugs,

9/18/2003 20:06

Ay my dear sister Sandy, of course you will have all those awful feelings, but remember Derek its reunited with Shane, I am sure, God's love its so "MUCH", Thanks to His love we are able to keep alive.I love you all. Selva

9/19/2003 05:51

Dear Sandy, ~ We welcome you back with compassion and open arms. I know this has been a most difficult time for both you and your entire family. It is so difficult when we have to hold our own grief inside while trying to be strong for others whom we know are in so much pain. Sometimes when we are faced with such a difficult task, I believe our Lord and Savior allows us to release some of it while we are in a dream state. Even then, it's still so difficult for us because it is all so new and we are still dealing with the sudden shock of facing our loss. Then, too, there is so very much we will never be able to understand about why we must endure the reality of death. Still we know in our hearts that our God is a loving God and that He hurts when we hurt, and He knows our pain and cradles us in His arms just as our parents once did when we were hurting. So we know that we can always go to Him and crawl up on His lap and allow Him to rock us in His loving arms. And even though the pain is still there, somehow, just knowing that we can turn to Him, helps us to endure. This had to be so painful for you to have this happen on our dear Shane's monthly anniversary. That, plus the love you have in your heart for Derek, plus knowing how difficult this is for his parents and your entire family is a heavy load to carry -- not to mention being concerned about all of us angel moms. So, you must take it easy for a few days, and allow yourself time to grieve for your nephew, as well as renew your strength, so that you can continue to do what you do so well. That is; be there for others. I know how important this circle and all of us are to you. We all know that when God whispered in your ear to start this circle for bereaved parents, you listened and obeyed. And because you did, you have helped so many to make the effort to carry the heavy cross of their child's passing. And, I know you love doing God's work. But, God has placed it on my heart to tell you that it's OK for you to take a few days vacation, and allow your heart to begin to heal. We will hold the fort for you so don't worry! OK? :) And, if you don't listen ... I'm TELLING!!! :) So, try to listen, dear Sandy, and take a little time to allow the healing to begin. You know you are in our prayers and love, always!
Much love, and Tender Angel Hugs,
Verna, and All Angel Moms!
We Love You!!!

9/19/2003 06:41

Dear Billie, ~ I am so sorry for the pain you are in. May it comfort you to know that it want always be so painful. Please read everything you can find on Men and Grief. I can tell you now, that your husband is in more pain than you will ever know! Remember, dads/men cannot express their grief in ways that we moms/women can. Men are taught early on that men don't cry, that they must be strong for us, no matter what. Try to imagine what that must be like for him! Try to imagine how you would feel if you were not allowed to express your grief over losing your precious son. Right now, your husband is feeling the pain of losing his son, plus he feels helpless because he knows how much you are hurting and that he cannot stop your pain. Men like to feel that they can handle anything. But this is something that he cannot handle and he cannot fix. Many grieving moms will tell you how disappointed they felt in the beginning stages of grieving because they felt they did not have the support they felt they needed from their husbands after losing their precious child. I went through that, and I can tell you that I had no idea of the pain that my husband was in. Only through reading and counseling did I eventually learn how difficult it is for dads/men who are grieving. So, if you are expecting the hugs and kind words, ... He cannot express his feelings right now! He cannot chance showing his true feelings. Maybe some men can, but he can't! To do so would destroy him! I am not asking that you like it, just that you be aware of it, for the sake of your marriage. Many marriages do not survive the death of a child simply because of a lack of understanding on this issue. So, I urge you to read, as well as seek counseling on this important issue. I am sure Sandy and maybe some of the other moms will advise you on this, even though their personal experiences may have been much different. In most cases, however, I believe you will find this is the way most men express grief. I hope this help a little, Billie. I will continue to pray for you and family.
Much love and Tender Angel Hugs,

9/19/2003 09:39

Dear God, ~ Thank you for being there for all of us angel moms. Lord, our newly bereaved moms need you and depend on you to provide those precious moments of peace that they so desperately need. Lord, they don't know that the fond memories will someday take away the unbearable pain. Thank you for surrounding each mom with your unconditional love during these deep dark valley days. For those of us who have been on our grief journey a while longer and have made it through those dark valley days ... Thank you for giving us the strength and the heartfelt desire to continue reaching out to these newly bereaved moms who are in such indescribable grief and pain -- unlike anything they have ever felt. I ask that you would wrap your arms around them Lord, and keep them close to your heart. Give them signs from You, Lord, to let them know that their beloved children are in heaven and in your gentle and loving care. Remind them often Lord, that their child, and in some cases, children, are happy and in no more pain. And that someday, they will embrace their child/children again. Thank You Father God, in Your Son Jesus' name I pray, Amen!

9/20/2003 14:47

Hello Angel Moms, ~ As most of you know, Sandy had a death in her family most recently, so she will be taking a few days off. I told Sandy that we will keep the circle going until she returns. Having been on my grief journey a few years longer than most of our angel moms, I will continue to try to answer any questions you may have about the different stages of the grief process as best I can. Having been there, I can relate to the pain that our newly bereaved parents are experiencing now as the result of losing a precious and beloved son or daughter. It is by far the worst pain any mom will ever know. Yet, we have found that it helps to talk about our child and also about our pain. Keeping all that pain balled up inside is simply too much to bear! So let us continue to pray for each other and support each other in any way that we can. We moms who have been on our grief journey a little longer can't stop your pain, but we will walk with you through it, listen to you pour out your feelings, send you a few of our bear hugs and angel hugs, and most importantly, we can pray that God, in his tender mercy, will give you those precious moments of pain free peace, for which we all pray!
Much love, & hugs,

9/20/2003 15:07

Also new angel moms, if you haven't provided us with your child's date of birth and heavenly date, please do so when you post. We angel moms try to provide a little extra support for each other on our special days. Also, new moms, if you haven't built a memorial for your child, there is a place provided for that. If you need help with it, please don't hesitate to let us know.

Lisa, Selva, Deb, (HELP!) :) If you will please send me an updated list of our angels list. I want to try to create a database if I can figure it out. Having a few computer problems, but so far I am still able to post without being knocked off line too many times. ~Thanks, angel moms!
Love & hugs,

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