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Shane Whalen
This Prayer Circle is Dedicated to my son Shane Whalen Who Passed Away On March 15, 1999 at the Age of 24, & All Other Children


Start a prayer circle for bereaved parents who have lost a child.


There are many of us out there who have lost a child, and it is devastating. It changes the outlook on life, plunges you into a depression, and you think that the feelings and thoughts you have nobody else could possibly relate to. I think a prayer circle for bereaved parents would only benefit us and help us on our journey of grief. This Circle is one of Love, where a Grieving Parent can safely come to for Prayers, and to talk about their feelings.

 
Shaner -10/14/2000
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speedyni
9/12/2003 21:32

Angle mom's hello, I have posted a few times but I am still new at all this. It has been 68 days since my Nicholas went to heaven and it doesn't seem to be getting any easier. Everyone I talk to tells me that I need to go on with my life. I just don't see how I am ever going to be able to do that. Nicholas was my whole life and my life will never be the same. I fell that you angel mom's are really the only one's that know how I am feeling. These last few weeks have been really hard. I have been waking up at 5:00 am every morning and then by the time 6 or 7 o'clock comes around I am exhausted. I have a 6 year old Michael, which I know it is unfair to him, for the why I am but I don't know what to do. I try to be loving and playful with him but I just feel so much guilt because my Nicholas is not here. I thought running would help me but all I do is think about Nicholas as I am running and I get more depressed. I have alot of Why's and I am not getting any answers. I haven't had any kind of feelings that Nicholas is with me. Why is that? I miss him so much and I really don't see how I will go on. I walk around in a fog all day long. I will be praying for all you angel mom's as I know you will be praying for me.

Billie


SELVAM
9/12/2003 22:59

HI my dear Billie, we understand what your are going through, it is so early in your journey, I am probably the one who can not gieve you so much relief, but please, keep coming here at this Circle of Love, we all understand what you are going through, yes Nicholas is not here in Earth, but he is watching over you and his little brother Michael. You have all the rights to feel that way, you are going through the most painful time in your life, there is no other pain compared to this, of course you are going around, and running, and the uilt its just one of uour painful ways, the whys we all have, only God knows about that. Please hang on to God, that is all we can do, what you are going through is part of the process, see? we are not supposed to loosed our childs,but God knows why,. I am very new at this, but please hang on, and very important, please keep posting here again, we have this wonderful Angel moms in this praying Circle of Love, who has been there a little longer than we have, they will teach you how to go on and handle this better than I am, but remember we are on in this together, we understand the pain, the anger, the whys, so please keep coming back and we all will help you to keep on going with this awful pain. You will not be judged, all you will find here its a lot of understanding and support. Please keep on coming back. I did, and this Angel moms have done wonders for me. May God Bless you and my (our) prayers will be with you 24/7 Love you my friend. Selva


shaner
9/12/2003 23:32

Hi my dear sister, I'm posting late, Chris came home for the weekend, I am SO happy, I miss him so much too, living and working in another city, so we will enjoy this weekend!!
Oh I know, my sister, I saw the predictions for this Hurricane, it is a Level 5, the highest, and right now it's on course to hit the Bahamas, and then Florida, BUT with many praying, I'm trusting that it goes out to sea, and doesn't hit land! I can imagine the line-ups, everybody getting ready, I guess everyone knows what to stock up on, but I'm praying as I'm sure all are that people will NOT have to use them.
Oh gee, wonder what this flu is that's going around, your sister has it and now you feel like you're getting it. Just try to rest and take it easy, and hopefully your body will fight it off.
I know my sister, a very sad week, with your co-worker suddenly dying, were you up to going to the Funeral? If not, I'm sure everyone understood. Take good care of yourself, love you too, you know that, and my prayers are with you,
Love & Bear Hugs,
Sandy


shaner
9/12/2003 23:49

Hello Angel Mom Billie, I can feel your pain right through your post. Our dear Selva gave you some very good advise and sharing. Well-meaning people may be telling you to 'get on with it', but they just don't understand that this is the worst pain we will EVER experience, and we have to grieve, in OUR own time, not somebody else's. So please don't listen to them, thankfully they don't know what this is like. Everything you're feeling and experiencing is very normal, all of us have gone through it, and some are still going through it. No, you're life will never be the same again, but I promise you that in time, and lots of it, the pain won't be 24/7, and you'll learn how to live with it. I know that's difficult to believe right now, if somebody told me that 4 years ago, I would have thought, they don't know what they're talking about, but it's true, and please hang on, lean heavily on Our Lord for comfort, and it's so important to let your pain out, you go ahead and cry whenever you want to, and you can post here about how you're feeling, as our dear sister said, we all understand and care. Have you seen your Dr. about losing Nick, sometimes we need a little help so we can cope as best we can. Also, a lot of Moms go for Counselling, have you thought about that? Whatever you're feeling is OK, it's normal, and you WILL feel Nick, just give it time!
Our prayers, support and love are with you, post whenever you want,
Love & Hugs,
Sandy


SELVAM
9/13/2003 18:40

Hi my sster. I am so glad that Chris its visiting, Thank God, dont worry my sister, you have a great weekend, and I will keep the fort for you. Enjoy it and don't worry about anything. I will be here for you my sister, and please give a kiss to Chris from his Cuban aunt. Love you and please enjoy your kid. Love Selva


LOVE2U
9/13/2003 18:51

Dear Angel Moms, ~ Please copy this prayer and place it near your monitor ... to remind
you of Godís continuous and unconditional love that flows through each of us each and everyday. Read it whenever
time permits. During valley days, meditate of itís contents to remind yourself that you are a child of God, the creator of all, and because of His tender mercy, and the price our Lord and Savior paid for all time, You
donít have to walk this endless and painful journey alone. No matter how long it takes ... You will NEVER have to carry your heavy burden alone!
Once memorized, pray this prayer the moment you open your eyes each morning. Pray
this prayer when you canít sleep at night. Pray this prayer when your cross seems too
much to bear! Pray this prayer to teach you patience until God provides answers to all the ďWhyĒ
questions. When lifeís storms consume you, lean heavily on the power of this Angel
Momís Prayer! Allow it to enter your heart and soak up some of the unbearable
grief and pain as it continues to build up inside your torn and shattered heart. Meditate on
surrendering to God and accept Godís unconditional love, just for a moment at a time ... Allowing
it to permeate your entire being. Then, expect a miracle! Have faith in the words of an old
Negro spiritual which says: ďEven after all Iíve been through ... Still, I find joy!Ē
LOVE2U

~ An Angel Momís Prayer ~
Dear God in heaven, ~ I surrender my life and all my burdens to You. Help me to accept
the love, hugs, prayers, and compassion that You extended to me throughout this day.
Allow me to recognize and use what I need from each kind and thoughtful expression,
each and everyday. Thank You for the slow, tender and continuous healing of my broken heart, my
mind, body, soul, and spirit. Remind me often, Lord, that You are with me even during
times when I canít feel your nearness, and that each thoughtful act, is an example of the
unconditional love that You extend to me ... through others ... continuously throughout
each day. As I continue on my grief journey, dear Lord ... In everything I do ... Teach me
how to become more Christ like in my spirit towards others who are hurting and in need
of prayer. ďTo God be the gloryĒ! In Jesus name, Amen


LOVE2U
9/13/2003 18:59

Dear Angel Moms, ~ God has heard your cry! Close your eyes and feel His tender touch. Feel the nearness of your child's spirit. It is literally all around you! Wrap your arms around your child's spirit. Thank God for allowing your child's spirit to be near you at all times! Lay your head on God's shoulder and allow Him to comfort you! Always remember that God's love for each of us is unconditional, and that nothing can separate us from the love of God!
Much love and Tender Angel Hugs,
Verna


LOVE2U
9/13/2003 19:38

Dear Billie, ~ My heart aches for you and all that you are feeling at this stage of grieving the loss of your precious child, Nicholas. You have only just begun! How could anyone in their right mind suggest that you move on at this stage? Let me suggest this: When people tell you to move on ... Smile, if possible, and ask God to please forgive them because they know not what they are talking about! Remember Job's well meaning friends who gave advice that did more harm than good? It might not be a bad idea to refer them to the book of Job and recommend they read it and pray for understanding. :) Moving on will come in time, but YOUR time! And 68 days is NOT long enough for you to even be thinking about moving on! This is a time for you to pamper yourself and allow others who have been where you are to pray for strength and healing of your torn and shattered heart! Right now, you probably are feeling like the pain will never end and that there is no way that anyone has ever felt the kind of pain you are feeling! To have someone to say to you, "Try to move on", can only add to your grief. So, I am requesting that all angel moms will join me in praying for all these well meaning people who have no idea what to say to those of us who are in the very early stages of grieving and living with such indescribable grief and pain! So we will storm heaven with prayer for "Job" comforters! In the meantime, Billy, may it help to know that you are very much in my thoughts, and the thoughts of the other angel moms, and in our heartfelt prayers! Remember to grieve at your own pace, and let no one tell you when it is time to move on. Only God can reveal that to you! Trust me on this: God would NEVER say something so hurtful to a newly grieving angel mom! May it help to know that you are surrounded with much love, compassion, and understanding here. Only those of us who have been where you are can truly relate to what you are going through! Again, our prayers are with you and family.
Love & Tender Angel & Bear Hugs,
Verna


LOVE2U
9/13/2003 21:54

Hello Dear Sandy, ~ I want you to know I can feel your smile and your joy all the way down here in Louisiana! What a wonderful blessing to have your beloved Chris home for the weekend. I know I don't have to tell you to spend every precious moment enjoying him! You, my dear friend, deserve this well deserved break. Selva and I will hold the check in for anyone who needs prayer. So don't worry about the circle. Enjoy your weekend!
Love & Hugs,
Verna


LOVE2U
9/13/2003 22:02

Dear Selva, ~ I know you are in deep valley days, and with all that's happening with the weather, I know this adds to your stress. You know we angel moms will be praying for your safety and the safety of all concerned. Like Sandy said, ... Hopefully, the Hurricane will go out to sea. Make sure to keep us informed if possible, to let us know that you are safe and in no immediate danger.
Love & Hugs,
Verna


LOVE2U
9/13/2003 22:21

Dear Lisa, ~ What's happening now I refer to as panic attacks. They can hit you from the blind side at any given moment. Remember to take it slow and always try to find a way to express your grief. That's the only way to allow the healing of your broken heart to begin to mend. No, it will never go completely away no matter the time, but it will become easier as time goes by. Right now, however, you must grieve your loss! As you said, this was your child! And the love bond that continues is what makes it hurt so bad. Even though he is with you in spirit, you can't help but miss his physical presence. Sometimes, even after all this time ... I imagine Diane coming through the door yelling, "HELLOOOOOO Mother!" Then, once inside, she would always lower her voice and say, "Hey Ma," with a big smile on her face and then, give me a big hug! :) I ask you, ... How can we not miss them? :( You have every right to miss your son and God understands and will be with you and give you the strength to make it through each day; One minute, one hour, one day at a time. And, of course you know that your are in our prayers!
Love & Angel Hugs,
Verna


LOVE2U
9/13/2003 22:25

Dear Donna, ~ Just want to say that I am praying for both you and Sher daily and hope that both you and she are doing well. Big Bear Hugs to both of you!
Love & Prayers,
Verna


LOVE2U
9/13/2003 22:45

Dear Deb, ~ I pray that you and family are doing well, and that you are taking good care of yourself and that your heart is continuing to heal after enduring two special days so close together. I will keep you and family in my prayers.
Love and Hugs,
Verna


LOVE2U
9/13/2003 22:48

Dear Eva,and Yvonne, ~ Please know that you are remembered and being prayed for. God bless you and keep you and your families in his care!
Love & Hugs,
Verna


kyleneiloveu
9/13/2003 23:10

i am so grateful for this circle, 1 month ago yesterday my little girl was hit by a hit and run driver while riding her bike.i miss her sooo much she was my only daughter(i have 2 son's) she was 23 yrs old, the pain is so fresh and even though i am going on with life, i feel like no one really knows how i hurt inside, and it sorta makes it hard.shaner i was wondering about the group you talked about "dealing with the loss of a child". you see i am also a recovering addict and satan is messing with my head real bad with this.i could really use some prayer and support right now.god bless your soul for this cirlce, thank you for letting me share


LOVE2U
9/13/2003 23:17

Dear TONYA31N2003 (Tonya) I was sorry to read of your loss. I, too, have lost a brother. Although it's been a while, the pain is still there. Sandy has given you some excellent advice on how to help your 10 year old son through this. Allowing him to talk about what he is feeling and letting him know that it's ok to feel sad and miss his uncle is the best way to deal with it. I smiled when I read your comment about your 3 year old. Isn't it wonderful how God spares them from the deep pain and loss. My brother's little grandson told my brother's wife, "Grandma, look at me! I'm just like him!" ... Meaning he looks like my brother. :) I thought that was sweet and thoughtful for a 4 yr old to say while trying to lift his grandma's spirit. It take's time, grieving the loss of a dear and treasured loved one, so give yourself lots of time to grieve. Continue to talk to your 10 year old about his uncle. You might ask if he would like to do some special project in memory of his uncle. Don't force the issue; just take your cues from him. Whatever brings him comfort and peace of mind is the right thing to do. God bless you and family.
Love & Tender Bear Hugs,
Verna


LOVE2U
9/13/2003 23:40

Dear ILuvNY321 ~ I was sorry to read of your friend Rose losing her son Author, and so recently. No doubt, she is in very much pain and will need someone to stand by her. God bless you for taking the time and caring enough to request prayer for her. It's going to be pretty rough during the very early stages of her grieving process. Please let Rose know that she is being prayed for by all the angel moms and that we will walk with her through her loss. Maybe in time, when she feels up to it, she might want to visit our circle if only to read some of the current as well as back posts. It may prove helpful to her to know that she is not alone, and that others are praying for her. Again, God bless you for your show of compassion for your friend, and you may be sure that we will ask the Lord to send Rose her own special guardian angel to watch over her.
Love and Angel Hugs,
Verna


LOVE2U
9/14/2003 00:12

Dear kyleneiloveu ~ I just clicked back on to submit a post and saw your post. First let me say, welcome to our circle of love, and how glad I am that you found it. Sandy may check in tonight, but just in case she does not, Let me assure you that we welcome you and please know that you will be prayed for here! I am so very sorry to read of the loss of your precious daughter. I, too, have lost a precious daughter. My daughter, Diane, was killed in a chain reaction crash which involved 2 cars, 2 pickup trucks and drunk driving. Diane was a front seat passenger and was ejected from one of the cars. Although it's been 7 years now, I still miss her, but the pain is not so intense. You may be sure that we will storm heaven with prayer for you. Beginning tonight,I will light a candle in memory of your daughter. And I will pray and ask God to shield you from the evil one whose only desire is to kill, steal and destroy God's children. Hold on to God, and lean heavily on our Lord for the strength you will need as you continue to grieve your loss! The evil one will try his best to tempt you during your hours of grief and sadness! If you will look back at the prayer I submitted above, I believe you will find a measure of comfort in those words which was given to me by God's Holy Spirit to share especially with our newly bereaved moms. Also, a page or so back, I submitted a poem that may give you some peace of mind during this time. Please give yourself all the time you need to grieve. Trying to move on too soon will do more harm than good. It may also prove helpful to visit the MADD website and read some of the pamplet that discuss the different stages of grieving and what to expect at each stage. Although we all grieve differently and at our own pace, there are certain elements that we all can relate to as we continue on our grief journey. May God wrap His arms around you and keep you in His care!
Love & Angel Hugs,
Verna


kyleneiloveu
9/14/2003 02:50

i submitted a prayer earlier this evening and i don't know how to get back to this site without submitting another prayer...can anyone tell me how to log on to this prayer circle, or is it possible without submitting a prayer


kyleneiloveu
9/14/2003 03:13

verna, thank you sooo much for your words of encouragement,the candle and most especially the prayers. i know i need all the prayer i can get. i thank God i found this circle because i was starting to feel so alone and lost in my pain. it has been a long time since i haven't liked being alone and now i feel like i have reverted back to a little girl myself and i don't want to be alone, it's like being lost and your not. God bless all of you that share your loss and the pain that comes with it, because just reading all the encouraging words, and the sharing helps me know that all that i am feeling is not going to consume me and i'm not strange. this is the first time i have ever lost someone in my family, and for it to be my baby girl it is very hard to handle, i sorta don't think about it so i don't feel the pain, it's like she is only a phone call away only when i think to call her, she's not there anymore and then it hurts. it hurts real bad. again thanks for letting me talk about my little girl and for just listening.
love from the heart,and God bless all of you.


deborahpoo
9/14/2003 06:20

hi all new and old angel moms,
sorry i have been away for a while but last month was real hard for me and i know it was for selva and verna too. I have been so tired since i went back to work. forgot what it was like to be working and running after the little ones in are classroom. i have also started my class on tuesday nights so that night is late for me. just trying to get back in the aroutine. i finally went back to curves this thursday since going back to work too. today i will just sit home and relaxe. need to read a chapter in my book for class. i have missed you all so much and plan on reading all the back post to catch up with everyone. i ended at 168 so i have alot of catching up to do.
yesturday i was so hapy when i went to read my mail. imy best friend who i havent talked t in two years emailed me and i'm so happy i never changed my screen name. we are getting together this thursday. i meet her 16 yearsago she was in my wedding and there for me when michael passe away and then all of a sudden after she borrowed money from me she never called me nd then after1 week with out reading my mail(298) emails her screen name was there. i started crying. i am so happy i never changed it. my prayers where answered. i have been thinking about you all somuch and keep you in my prayers. lots of prayers and happy thoughts for you all. luv Debby


SELVAM
9/14/2003 15:07

Hi Kyleneiloveu, and welcome to this Circle of Love, first of all let me explain how to get back here , so you don't loose this wonderful Circle of Love and Friends, first put www,beliefnet.com in your favorites, then all you have to do is click on the Prayers Circles that reads. Bereaved parents, and it will take you to shere you submitted your post, if you scroll down after reading our posts, you will see come numbers, when you posted for the first time it was page 172, so if you see more numbers after that, you click on it and you will find more prayers and messages for you . I am sure.
Now let me tell you my dear friend, this is a Circle of love, you will find lots of love, understanding, prayers and some relief for your pain. We all know about your pain, some have been a little longer in this awful journey, others like myself are somewhat new at this. I lost my only child , 20 years old daughter in a car accident 13 months ago, so you can imagine that I know the pain you are going through right now. Just let it out, everything you are going through right now is OK, you might be feelings lots of anger, and that is OK, lots of WHYS and that is also OK, you have every right in this world to feel all those strange feelings, there is not much that we can do about it right now but to feel that awful pain, cry as much as you want to and Please Hang on to God, if He puts you through it He hill pull you through it. Just don't do anything to harm yourself, it is not your fault, hang in there as much as you can, one of the things I did was to buy a punching bag with gloves and all, and every time I feel dispair or angry I just go and punch that bag as hard as I can, this way I don't take it out on myself, try everything my friend but now you have to take care of yourself, don't do anything that your daughter don't want for you. She is still there with you, we just can't see them, Try books so you can understand this a little better and if you can, try profesional help, I have been going to a Pshycologist ever since. If you want I can recomend some good books to read. But please keep on coming here. We will be here for you always. You will me in my prayers 24/7 I promise. just please keep on coming back, we will try to help you. Love Selva


shaner
9/14/2003 19:38

Hello dear Angel Moms!! Thank you dear Miss V and my dear sister for 'holding down the fort'! YES, had a terrific weekend with Chris home, he left around noon today to go back to Ottawa, his beloved football is on today, :) But it was so nice to have him home again, my 31 year-old 'baby', :) and thanks to you two loving friends, I was able to spend his time home with him, and his Dad, and know the Circle was in the best of hands!!
Much love & lots of Angel Hugs,
Sandy


shaner
9/14/2003 20:25

Hello kyleneiloveu, I'm so grateful you found us, but so very sorry for the reason why. You can talk about your little girl here all you want, sweetie, and we'll be here to listen. Gosh, it's only been a month for you, you must be in so much pain, shock and disbelief right now. Your entire world has been turned upside down. It's so important to let the tears come and let them out, and to be able to talk about your loss and your feelings, only by letting our pain out do we slowly begin to heal on our Journey. Verna and Selva gave you very good advise, and I pray that you do return here any time you want, we're always here for each other with support, understanding, prayers and love. So you're not alone, you have us, Our dear Lord, and I also pray you have supportive people around you right now that will allow you to grieve, cry, and just listen. Being a 12 stepper, can you talk to your Sponsor about your feelings? I'm humbly asking Our dear Lord to put a hedge of protection around you, strong warring Angels, to keep you safe from any evil or negative thoughts. You're experiencing the worst pain a parent will ever feel, but remember, love never dies, so the love that you and your daughter have is still there and will be for Eternity!
Hmm, I've been racking my brain trying to think of any Group I've mentioned, but I think I was talking about the very good books that are out there to help you with grieving the loss of a child, I'll go back in the pages to look, but I'm fairly certain that's what I was referring to. Please write back and tell us all about your precious daughter, and maybe in time you'll feel like making a Memorial for her here, a loving tribute to your daughter's life and a beautiful way to honour her spirit. Our prayers and love are with you, we can't take your pain away, but we can walk by your side as you begin your Journey, in this Circle of Love. May our Lord give you the necessary spiritual and physical strength at this time, and His peace, knowing that He cries along with you in your pain. God bless you sweetie, and know we're all here for you and each other,
Love, Prayers and Angel Hugs,
Sandy

 
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