Prayer Circles

ravensclaw, what a wonderful, touching post! Thank you so much for taking the time to post it here! You have spoken eloquently the way our children would want us to hear. I myself find much comfort being out in God's wonderful nature and creation. Watching a beautiful sunset, or a sunrise, going for a walk in the woods near our home, it all renews my spirit and connects me to my son and his. I wonder if other mothers on these pages find comfort being out in God's wondrous creation, I hope so. I know of another mother and I who like sitting out at night, gazing up at the stars, and thinking our children are up there twinkling right now.
Yes, our children will forever be in our hearts, but they are only a thought away until we're reunited with them again!
Luv Sandy

JESUSISTHEANSWER, thank you for your prayers and posting here also!
I'm very sorry to hear of your nephew, again so young and tragically! I pray his parents are doing much better now, and yes, Our Lord has gotten us through some very rough times! Once again, thank you for your prayers!
Luv Sandy

my prays are with each one of you it's
not easy to let go but when we trust in
god and know they belong to him .
we know he will hold them in the plam
of his hand .
we don't worry because we could not place
them in any better hands

whatever78834, thank you for your prayers for us all; it's very thoughtful of you to post here and offer your prayers. God bless,
Luv Sandy

Dear Shaner, I am so sorry over the loss of your son. I lost my eldest son Jeff, age 18 in 1983. Time helps but really Jesus Christ is the only true help I have had. I just have to think His name and He will give me peace. Jeff was a believer also so I know where he is and that I will see him again one day. It has been a devastation to our family but we are going on with our lives. Some days it seems like it was just yesterday. It is the little things that hurt, like the empty place at the table, seeing his favorite foods in the grocery store,etc. A piece has been torn from our hearts but God's grace really is sufficient for all.It has made me more compassionate toward people for all reasons and lets me know that God can take bad and use it for good. The Bible says our days are numbered and only God knows when they are up, so we need to be ready to meet Him. After almost 19 years since the death of my son, I still don't understand it and have trouble accepting it but I know one day I will understand it all. Our children are really just on loan to us and we need to treasure them while we can. My prayers are with you in the days ahead that God will give you His Peace and His most sufficient Grace and Love...Pattyck

pattyck1, thank you for your kind words and prayers. I am also sorry to hear of the loss of your son too. It is funny, isn't it how the little things can set us off or make us sad. Such as seeing your Jeff's favourite food in the grocery store, or the empty place at the table, or a song that reminds you of them, or any number of things, I could go on and on. They will always be there, and we have to live with them, with the help of Our Lord. Yes, you're absolutely right, God can take a tragedy in our lives and turn us around to use it for good. Our Heavenly Father has blessed me in so many other ways since our son's death and made a better person out of me. I think about my son everyday and miss him so, but I rest in the knowledge that one day we will be reunited. God bless you and our prayers go out to you also.
Luv Sandy

I'm sure that when our Kristina died I knew this was a pain that will never go away, and after hearing pattyck1's words, I know it to be true. The little things truly do hurt the most. On loan or not, it still hurts to part after what seemed like such a short time. My ability to truly pray still fails me - I am counting on all of you to lift us up in prayer. God bless!

Dear Shaner, Thank you for your prayers. I forgot to add one thing and that I am going to be a Grandmother for the first time in 2-3 weeks. My youngest son Terry and his wife are having a baby and if it is a boy they are giving it Jeff's middle name. His name will be Joseph Allan Taylor. It was their idea and means a lot to me.
Please remember them in prayer for the birth and that they will raise the baby to know the Lord. They already play tapes of scripture and Bible stories for the baby and they came to our Church for a Play and every time the name Jesus was mentioned, the baby would kick a lot. This thrilled me and I look so forward to this child in our lives. God has blessed me so many times over the years and took care of me when I needed it and I can never thank or praise Him enough. Take care and rest on the Lord....Pat

I to lost my only son(Sam) because of a drunk driver.My loss has saddened me so,but i know he now lives with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.I know he is in a better place,but it still doesnt take away the hurt,and the emptiness in my heart.I miss him so bad,but I know one day I will join him and know the beauty and love he is surrounded with always.My heart aches for all of you who have lost a child.I just don't believe there is another pain that compaires to loseing a child.Part of me died along with my Sam.
Thank you for letting me share.

Hi Cindy, I'm so happy to see you posting again! A friend of mine who also lost a child many years ago once told me that the pain will subside somewhat, in time it won't feel like knives stabbing your heart, it'll feel like pinpricks. I didn't believe it at the time, but now I do. The terrible, awful pain is now gone and the pinpricks are what I feel now mostly. In other words, the pain is still there, but not as bad as when my Shane first passed away. It'll always be there, like Jeff's mom says, but God does help you with it and I have learned how to live with it. I'm a different person since my son passed away, just as you are with losing Kristina, our lives are forever changed, a big part of us went with them. But you are still newly bereaved and you are experiencing the awful pain right now and all the emotions that go along with it, don't worry about your prayer, just keep praying and we'll definitely keep you in our prayers too!! God bless you Cindy,
Luv Sandy

pat, congratulations! A new baby is such a blessing! And you must be so excited to be a grandmother! That's so thoughtful of your son and his wife to honour Jeff by giving the baby his middle name, it's a wonderful legacy to bestow. A wonderful blessing from God!
Luv Sandy

walkinbeauty, I'm so very sorry to hear of the loss of your beloved Sam, so tragically. Yes, even though we know our children are in a better place, we miss their physical presence so much, a part of our heart went with them. No, I don't believe either that any other pain compares with losing one of your children, they are a part of you and you always feel that a part of you is missing. May God bless you also and we'll keep you in our prayers.
Luv Sandy

shaner,Thank you very much,I would like to post Sam's web site's if anyone would like to visit them.And you can see
what a wonderful young man I lost.
http://webdeals.net/sam.htm
http://communities.msn.com/MySonSammyCurtisGarner
Thank you all and God Bless.

walkinbeauty, I visited one of your websites yesterday, and saw the pictures of your beloved Sam! A handsome, fresh-faced young man, and so much love coming from your website! Beautifully done and thanks for sharing it with us all,
Luv Sandy

Shaner~
I sat down and wrote the poem on my first post after a car accident I was in a week ago. A young girl pulled out in front of my family's vehicle. We did all we could to avoid her. She died instantly on impact.

I was led to this prayer list trying to connect to what her parents might be going through. My family and I are on an emotional roller coaster right now. I have my good days and my bad ones. I keep trying to put myself her mother's place and I admit that it is too overwhelming for me to fully comprehend. I just know I feel for her family and all of the families that have ever had to experience losing a child. May God's Blessings and Light surround you all!
Raven~

GOD! JEHOVA, HELP US. HELP THE MOTHERS WHO HAVE LOST OUR CHILDREN. THANK YOU FOR GIVING US OUR MOST PRECIOUS GIFT. SPEAK TO OUR HEARTS LORD, AS ONLY YOU CAN DO. GIVE US STRENGTH AND COMPASSION. GIVE US JOY IN OUR SORROW. A BAND-AID FROM YOU. RESTORE US OH LORD. A TOUCH FROM YOU, AS WE TOUCH THE HEM OF YOUR GARMENT. RENEW OUR FAITH, OH GOD...WE SEEK YOU NOW, AND SEARCH FOR YOU, WITH ALL OF OUR HEARTS. IN THE NAME OF JESUS CHRIST, THE SAVIOR, WE PRAY. THANK YOU. AMEN AND AMEN.

Raven, you have a very kind heart and a compassionate soul. What happened to you and your family was an accident, so I pray that none of you feel guilty. It was an accident, plain and simple as that. I can well imagine that your own family has been on an emotional rollercoaster, but it was NOT their fault! Yes, the girl's family is in deep grief right now, and the best thing you can do for them and for yourself and your family is pray!
You very eloquently put into words in your first post what the young girl would want her family to know, as well as what our children would want us to know and it was a very comforting post. The fact that you're trying to comprehend what the other family is feeling speaks volumes about what kind of person you are! As I said, you have a very good heart and I'm so happy that you shared your story with us! You, your family and the young lady's will be prayed for here, for a spiritual peace and strength to enfold you all. May Our Heavenly Father, in His goodness and love, wrap His arms around all of you. God bless you and post whenever you feel like it.
Luv Sandy

junecleaver2, thank you for your post and your prayers! God bless you,
Luv Sandy

Shaner, I tried to write to you a while ago and got to crying so bad I couldn't see, so I stopped. I lost my 19 year old only son 4 years ago. He was such a super kid, and everyone loved him.He never met a stranger and he loved everyone too. I have been so deeply depressed that there are days that I don't want to get out of bed. I overdosed in March this year and was in the hospital for 3 days. I don't want too die but I don't want to live either.I lost who I am when Johnny died.I am a nurse why couldn't I have seen sooner that something was wrong. Why did it have to be him, I'm so mad at God, I've tried to reconcile myself and I know Johnny is in Heaven and I know that I am a born again believer but something is breaking my fellowship with God in Prayer and friends.Why couldn't I have seen it sooner. He got sick May 1 1997 and died June 9. He had a rare cancer and he only lived 40 days. We were so close, he still would sit on my lap and hold my hand in the mall or anywhere.I sit by his bedside and prayed and so many prayers were sent up for his recovery but I still lost him. I can't find my way back from the deep dark hole that swallowed me that day. I have seen doctors, I'm on medication but none of that helps. To anyone that has ever lost a child, is this all normal did you feel this way and will it ever get better.
Heavenly Father, help me oh Lord to draw closer to you and help me Father to be closer to you. Forgive me for all my unfaithfulness to you and help me to see that you are the resurection of my life and give me the strenght to carry on. Help these other parents to be lifted up from their burden of grief and help them to where I can't seem to find help. Thank You God for giving your only Son to die for me and my sins. How selfish I am that I can't give up someone that wasn't mine to begin with. Thank you Father for letting me and these other parents have our children as long as we did.Help me Lord to find a Christian Fellowship in a new church where I can be fed the word and do your work again. Draw me up and hold me close to you.
Thank you again Father for all our blessing. Amen

Shaner, may you be comforted always. Your son is with God and he will be protected and loved and suffer no more. He wants to see you live. May all parents who have lost their children be comforted.. May this poem I came across - offer a moment of peace. God bless you all.


God looked around His garden
And he found an empty place.
He then looked down upon the earth
And saw your tired face.
He put His arms around you.
And lifted you to rest.
God's garden must be beautiful
He always takes the best.
He knew that you were suffering.
He knew you were in pain,
He knew that you would never
Get well on earth again.
He saw the road was getting rough,
And the hills were hard to climb.
So He closed your weary eyelids
And whispered "Peace be thine."
It broke our hearts to lose you.
But you didn't go alone,
For part of us went with you
The day God called you home
Our deepest sympathies to you and your family...

Pra4pce2, my heart goes out to you, you're in a lot of pain over the loss of Johnny and your post is very sad. Johnny, like the rest of the children on these pages, is a special young man and is now home with the Father.
What you're feeling, such as blame, self-blame, the awful pain, wanting to die yourself, blaming God, is all very normal in the grieving process. What seems to come through strongly in your post is self-blame, as a mother and as a nurse. But you know sweetie, that you couldn't stop the illness, cancer is an awful disease and you know that sometimes it takes people very quickly and others have more time. We as mothers have an ingrained part of us that makes us like mother bears, protecting our young, and when our children die, we tend to blame ourselves for not being able to protect them, or the Doctors, or God Himself. But it's normal to experience that, and after a while we just have to let go of that, because we can't protect our children from their time to go back home. That part is out of our hands. Your beloved Johnny would not want to see his much loved mother in so much pain, have you done anything to keep his memory alive and honour his life and the mark he left on this earth? A lot of us mothers find great comfort keeping our child's memory going, honouring the life and love they gave to us and others, some of us do volunteer work in our child's name and spirit, or give to charities in our child's name, reach out to other young people who may need help and in doing so, honouring our child's spirit, these are a few examples, but I and I know other mothers do too, find great comfort in keeping and honouring the life and spirit of our child and want to keep it going. How is your husband handling Johnny's passing? I hope and pray that you have people around you that offer support and understanding, such as family, friends, clergy, and I would also strongly suggest that you join a Bereavement Group for Mothers/Parents, you will find tremendous support from such a group, with other parents and mothers who are experiencing the same feelings as you do. Perhaps your Dr. could suggest one for you, or one on one counselling with a trained Bereavement Specialist. You cannot go through this alone, it's too hard a road to go down by yourself. There is a lot of comfort in sharing. Try and remember the good times and laughs that you and Johnny shared, the special moments that you can forever hold in your heart. Johnny does not want you to take your own life, and neither do your other loved ones or anybody here on these pages. Our Heavenly Father knows how you feel right now and how hard Johnny's passing has been on you, so don't worry about being angry with Him, He does understand! But as hard as it is and as empty as it sometimes feels, please continue praying, He does want to help you and put the right people in your path to get you out of the black hole, so please never give up! I pray that my words here have brought you some comfort, and I'm very happy that you made that second attempt to post here, this is a safe place, a haven, for mothers/parents who are experiencing grief and have lost a child, please post here whenever you feel like it, even if you just want to vent your feelings. May Our Lord and Saviour be with you now and may Our Heavenly Father wrap you in His tender love and compassion and bring you back into the light.
God bless you,
Luv Sandy

Amandaang, thank you so much for your comforting words and prayers for us all, the beautiful poem you posted is very comforting too, thank you for taking the time and effort to post it here. May God bless you,
Luv Sandy

Pra4pce2, I'm sorry for the loss of your son Johnny, I lost my son who was 21 2 years ago to a horable accident that killed four young men so I can relate to how badly you hurt.Jason was my only son and I thought I would never ever be able to go on but through professional counceling with a therapist that had gone through the lost of a chld and with God's mercy and grace and through this circle and lots of good friends and family I was able to come to some kind of peace. All the things you are feeling are very normal but you have to seek help, drug help but they are not a cure for all. Sweetie talk with others that have gone through what you are going through and even though you can't call on God right now he knows your heart and he truly understands and whether you relize it or not he has you under his wings and he is carrying you every step. As Shaner said do something in his memory so that he will still exist in your life I have set up a scholorship at the college Jason attended so that a child will have a chance to go to college in his name and has been very beneficial. You have to do something to help yourself Johnny would not want this from you and you must remember he is your angel now and he is watching you every minute of the day he still lives inside your heart and one day you will be with him. His work on earth was done yours was not there is something God wants you to do try and kneel down and prayer for peace for God to reveal what he wants you to do. Everything I do in my life I do it to please God so that I will see my precious Jason again and you can do the same just ask him. I blamed God for taking Jason also he was all I had but beleive me I know something good will come of his death and I know we will never understand why until the day we are taken home to be with them just trust in God and I promise he will show you the way and always remember the circle is always open just like Shaner said even if you just want to vent or cry, we will cry with you. Your in my prayers and He said ask and you shall receive and I know God is going to touch you and give you some relief from this pain. The main thing is Trust In Him Even if you can't pray he hears your call.

Pra4pce2: I truly wish I could say that I don't understand what you are feeling, but unfortunately, I know all too well. I also see your ability to still pray to our Lord for strength and forgiveness - something I have not re-learned as of yet. My 20 yr. old daughter Kristina died from complications after chemo therapy only 3 weeks after being diagnosed with Acute Mylogeneous Leukemia. She was diagnosed on Feb. 22, 01 and died on March 15th, 01. I see pictures now, and the disease slaps me in the face and I can't believe we couldn't see how sick she was. The dr.'s were treating her for her inflamed tonsils, and by the time the other symptoms showed up, it was too far advanced. She died 3 weeks before her 21st birthday. I am in that "hole" you speak of on a regular basis, and my greatest solace is the support from other grieving mothers. Please know you are not alone. If you need to talk, you can e-mail at cindys1021@hotmail.com. And, remember, you are not alone, you will survive, and you are loved. Johnny will be remembered always and will always live in your heart.
Cindy S.
Littleton, CO