Prayer Circles

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Shane Whalen
This Prayer Circle is Dedicated to my son Shane Whalen Who Passed Away On March 15, 1999 at the Age of 24, & All Other Children

Start a prayer circle for bereaved parents who have lost a child.

There are many of us out there who have lost a child, and it is devastating. It changes the outlook on life, plunges you into a depression, and you think that the feelings and thoughts you have nobody else could possibly relate to. I think a prayer circle for bereaved parents would only benefit us and help us on our journey of grief. This Circle is one of Love, where a Grieving Parent can safely come to for Prayers, and to talk about their feelings.

Shaner -10/14/2000
send to a friend

Read Prayers.

6/22/2003 19:13

Hi my sisters, Sandy your wish came through, it is still raining here all day and tomorrow we have a 90% rain chance so please stop asking for rain, ha ha, I have the punching bag and gloves so I will not go out after that rat, I'm sure he is out of Miami by now. Have you all heard of Dr. Raymond Moody's book, well I recomend it to every one, he has a few books out, I have them all, one of them its called REUNIONS, visionary encounters with departed ones, he has seminars about this, so through te net I was able to get in touch with one of his fanily, He will have the only one or this year in upstate NY, but he has this place in Alabama, that he helps to have encounters, my Dr, told me that one of her patines went and she did have an encounter, so I'm looking forward to go. I will keep you posted on it. So remember no more worries, I have a huge punching bag and I am sure by now that he is not in Miami, and believe me I have kept an eye on him. Love you my sisters. Selva

6/22/2003 21:32

Selva, We are all relieved and you have a very smart sister, a punching bag with gloves, sounds good let us know how it goes, I need to some reading Verna I hope your reunion is a smash and that your feeling better like I said I need to do some catching up, Lisa how are you? Thanks Sandy hope it was a good swim. I Hope its a goodnight for everybody, going to do some catching up. Love&BearHugs Donna

6/24/2003 02:24

Dearest Sisters, Selva you can never say God doesn't hear your prayers and for all of you that have prayed for me and my Sister Shar I want you to know today was a day of answered prayer, there was only one medicine that could possibly help and ever since she began she was very ill and it looked like it wasn't going to work she was ill from the first dose, this was the wildcard if this medicine couldn't help she would not get better, well the answered prayers came today its not the medicine that is making her ill but a harsh virus and not the medicine so there is a good chance now she will have some relief and soon she will see results and be able to walk without a walker, Shar and I both want you to know God heard your prayers and we can breathe a big sigh of relief, than Jane who has been my son's girfriend got the job is Dallas and will be living with her brother who just left last week for a new job at a law firm this is her first move away from her family and we all Love her but we are releived she will be with her brother David we believe Justin will soon follow these three have been inseperateably since High School. Today was a day of answered prayer and Shar told me to tell you Thank you for your prayers and Yes God heard them one and all. It has been a trying time and I'm am so grateful to you all, Damon who lived next door with his grandparents is living on his own and visited today he's only 19 and his circustances were pretty tough but he is adjusting and doing well a few months ago he wanted to take his life and he's doing well under some tough family issues, from this morning on one Blessing after another has been answered and I'm so Happy for Shar and Jane and am optimistic for them all I know this hasn't been easy for Justin and it will be hard at first but he has told us he may go to Dallas and if he does I will be happy for them, You see your prayers were not in vain and Selva God heard you however you pray it was your heartfelt prayers as well as everyone who prayed, for the first time in awhile I am relieved and grateful to God for the Blessings you gave my family and soon my sister will begin to heal and hopefully be able to leave the walket behind. God Bless you all for your prayers and support during a difficult time.Love&BearHugs Donna

6/24/2003 20:26

My dear sister Donna, I knew that God would answer our prayers, I really hit Him hard on you and your sister, I'm so glad, and like I told you there is still hope and prayers, God Bless you both, about Justin, think back when you were his age, the time comes when we have to live our own experiences, and about life, I came to this country when I was 14, alone, and I survied, I learn the hard way but THE BASES, that my parents thoughed me, were there with me all the time, so don't worry so much, we all have to learn OUR OWN WAY, he will be fine, and remember he will be just a phone callaway, do you know when I came to this country I could not called my parents, at that time you will place a call to Cuba and then you did not know when they were going to connect, so you had to spend maybe 3 days 24/7 waiting for the call, and at that time I had to work part time , to eat and pay for a room and go to school at night, so I did not have the time to spend 3 days at my room waiting for the call, my mother and grandmother came 6 years later and my father a year after that, but I survived, so I'm sure Justin will too, and remember, he is only a phone call away or a plane ticket away, I never had that, and I'm alive, never got into trouble, sure I went through my teen age troubles, but I was alone, and guess what? I have no regrets, I went to school, went through my crisis, but I turned out to be a good person, so do not worry about Justin, I am sure he will be fine. Love you my sister. Selva
ps. It is raining 24/7 in Miami so I still can not hit my punching bag because it is out in the yard.

6/25/2003 02:37

Dearest Selva, You are an inspiration to us all, you see the Blessing I spoke of is its ok now at first it was hard but you wrote about your life and I thought of my own and kept giving it to God they are all ready and God gave us time to reunite after Mikeys Death. We had five babies 3 were born and Justin is the one who lived to go on for whatever God purpose is but at first it felt like grief because he is the first to survive and now its ok it would be unhealthy if he didn't move on but I needed time to adjust and realize he is a beautiful person in spite of all that has happened to him but knowing the threesome will still be together makes me happy, Damon had the worse push out of the nest and he's doing well still a little scared but ok and Justin has so much going for him and now its his turn, at his age I was married Justin was close to being a year old and you are so right he is only a phone call away and Dallas would offer a better life than here, so Thank you bunches for sharing it did help me to gain perspective. Love you Bunches Donna

6/25/2003 02:51

PS, I know you been hit alot with a rough spring with flooding and worse I hope it will end soon so you can beat the heck out of the punching bag. Its funny to think of you with boxing gloves I hope it helps I think your sister found the right outlet. Take Good Care ok Sandy wrote you probably know already that she had major dental work and will be getting well so not to worry if we don't hear from her for a couple of days so she can recover the Dr gave her pain meds which should help but in case anyone didn't know she didn't want us to worry. God Speed to a good recovery Sandy rest till your well and we'll do all the talking. Love to all present and God's Grace to all who aren't and hoping all is going easier. Verna, can't wait to hear about the reunion but I sure you need to recuperate after all that hard work. Goodnight Dear Sisters and God's peace for tomorrow. BearHugsssssssss Donna

6/25/2003 07:45

good moning angel moms,

yesturday was the very first day of my summer vacation and it felt so wired to be home. i still got up early and worked out at curves. I have to keep my schedrule :-) i hit my 1 year ann. from quitting smoking on sunday and i feel so good. I have more energy not that i needed any more i've been told. the ladies would like to know where i get all my energy :-). I talked to my dad yesterday and now he is down to 29lbs. He says he feels so good. He misses me and I miss him. He want's my husband and I to go away to New Hempshire or the cape instead visiting them. they want us too visit at christmas in stead. this week will go by real fast for it being my first week but i will get so much needed rest like some of you have told me.
yesterday i went and visited michael and just sat there and cried for we are in a heat wave and he loved this kind of weather just like his dad. i seen acouple of boys that looked like michael with his big baggie shorts and no shirt but a nice bronze tan, but when i got up close to them they weren't him..... the boys always tanned so nicey for he italain in them not the polish like me HA, HA, HA
i pray that every one is doing better today than yesterday and that all your prayers will be answered soon.
lots of thoughts and prayers for all you angel moms.

love debby

6/25/2003 20:45

Hi my Angel sisters, well today we had sunshine after 3 or 4 weeks of rain, I could not put my punching bag because I did not have the chains to hook it up, so I will wait until my brother comes on friday and the I will punch my anger away. Donna I am so glad you understand about Justin, you have to let go, and you are lucky that you have that chance, I will never have it. So let go, Justin will be just fine, and he has to learn his own way, we all did. Deb I'm so glad you are on vacation, I hope that you are enjoying it, just relax and take one day at a time, I hope you received my e mail, for the first time in 10 months I am looking forward to go anywhere, I don't go out of my sister's house at all, I go to work and then I pass by my house, sit down in Solange's bedroom, talk to her a little bit and then come back here, I don't talk to anyone, or go out anywhere, so I think this workshop will do me some good, please my sisters, I do recomend to read all of Dr. Raymond Moody's books, it is a hope, he is an MD and a PHD in pshycology so he is not a guess what artist, I am really looking forward to that workshop, my Dr, told me I should go, that it is why I wanted to share it with you all. Sandy, I am sure your hubby ordered pizza or maybe did a BBQ, just because you can not talk and complain, ha ha he is having a good time until your pain goes away, I hope by now everything its ok, our sister Verna must be having the time of her life with her class reunion, I really hope so. Love you my sisters. May God Bless You All. Selva

6/25/2003 21:13

Hello my dear sister, I take it back, no more rain for you - only sunshine so you can get out there and practise your boxing. I agree, your sister is so special to take such good care of you like that, she's such a blessing to you and your brother too, and I know you love them dearly. Yes, what an incredible inspiration you are, coming to a strange country and making a good life for yourself and Solange, you can be very proud of yourself and I know that your parents are too, shining brightly down on you! Love you my sister, and now I'm praying for sunshine for you, :)
Lots of love,

6/25/2003 21:30

Hi my sister, we were posting at the same time! And my prayers have been answered already, you've got sunshine after all that rain! I'm on a soup diet at the moment, and if my hubby EVER bought himself a pizza or had a steak, well, I'd find a way to yell at him, sore mouth or not! No, he's been very good, he had hot dogs for supper tonight, made them himself, :) while I had a nap. Yes, Verna's very busy, I heard from her today, but for some reason my mail to her isn't getting through, so Cindy is our go-between until she resolves the problem. You have a wonderful, peaceful evening, and send my love again!
Love & Hugs,

6/25/2003 22:01

Hello dear Donna, oh, I'm so happy about your sister, Praise God!! What a relief for Shar and for you, I know that only good things are going to come her way and she'll be walking by herself soon! Oh gosh sweetie, it is so hard to say good-bye when your child leaves the nest, but leave they must and start their own lives, just as we did. The first two years of University Chris attended one here, so he was still home. Then he decided to change his major from Engineering to Science, and had to move away to Ottawa to attend University there. Palmer and I rented a truck, but in the meantime I was busy putting together a 'care' box for him and dreading the day. This was after Shane had passed, so it was hitting me harder, I was so depressed thinking I had lost both now. Well we drove him down to start his 'new life', brought everything up to his Dorm room, and after everything had been put away, both Palmer and I broke out crying, the same way I did on his first day at Kindergarten. But you know, he didn't really leave, he calls us all the time, sends e-mails and visits as often as he can. Two weeks ago we proudly watched him walk across the Stage once again, in his gown, receiving his Master's Degree in Mathematics. And so will Justin find his way, and your 'loss' in time won't seem as bad, because he'll be calling you and you'll be calling him, and he will come home too when he can. It is hard to let go, no doubt about it, so you go ahead and cry just like I did, but trust me, you'll learn to adapt and still have a wonderful relationship with him - you'll probably get a lot of calls home in the beginning too, they seem to run out of money quickly, :) God bless you dear one, and you know my prayers and love are with you,
Lots of love and Bear Hugssss,

6/25/2003 22:32

Hi dear Deb, hurray for you, officially on holidays now! Yes, it must seem different at first, but you'll find plenty to do, you're still sticking to your routine, good for you, and congrats on your 1st year Anniversary being a non-smoker! Gosh your Dad is doing really well, losing more weight. It's a big accomplishment, good for him, and I know it makes you happy as well as your Mom to see him getting better. Ah, I'm sorry you had a rough day, yes, Shane loved the summer so much too, it brings back lots of memories. We're having this heat wave too, and my friend Ann called me today to see how I was feeling, she lives in Philadelphia, and they're having the same, hot and humid. After all the rain we've had, I'm not complaining. We went on a trip some years back to Maine, and went through New Hampshire, such a beautiful state! Wherever you decide to go, I pray you have a wonderful time. I think it's always 'summertime' in Heaven, so Michael is still enjoying it, and remember, he's only as far away as your heart, and when you talk to him, he hears you! I pray that all your prayers are answered too dear Deb, and my prayers and love are with you always,
Much love & Hugs,

6/26/2003 05:13



6/26/2003 14:01

Hi dear Deb, yes, I'm relaxing too, it's too hot to do anything else! Did go for a swim, it was so refreshing, and stayed a bit after to chat with my neighbours, but then it just got too hot for me, so I came in, and decided to check the Circle! That's exciting Deb, a new kitchen and living room set, it's always nice to buy new things, and they'll eventually go into your new home. If you're going to be working on your land in this heat, make sure and drink lots of water, you can get dehydrated very quickly working in this heat! Yes, dear Deb, all our Angels are basking in the best light of all!
Take care my friend,
Love & Hugs,

6/26/2003 20:17

Hi my sister Moms. wel. I had not so a happy day, today we went to the mortage loan co. and of course everything will come out Ok, I think, I am an accountant but hell I do not understand about mortgages, my sister took care of it, but do you know what that means? i have to get rid of my house and "Solange's room" I am not ready for it. I am in sooooo valley days, so please my sisters, say a little prayer for me, so I can go into Solange's room and then I do not know what to do, the construction will last for about 6 or 7 months, what I'm going to do with Solange's room I don't know. I am in deep valley days, I need your advice, Please my Angel Moms, pray for me. Thank you Love you Selva

6/26/2003 20:25

Hi my sister Deb, I am so glad that you will go into the new house and that will be a wonderful experience, I am so happy for you, and I know your son will be happy too, He will love the new house in the outdoors.May God Bless everything you do. Love you my sister. And I wish that you will find peace at your new house. Love Selva

6/27/2003 04:56

Dearest Sandy, Glad your doing a little better and you didn't grow web feet I was worried for awhile but sunshine Yeh, I think summer is full of precious memories because for awhile our children were all ours. Deb, so glad your Dad is doing better and after all that has happened you needed this vacation so I hope you pamper yourself, yes, it is hard when we see children that look like ours it stings and for a moment you forget to breathe I won't say that it gets easier but the precious memories bittersweet are our precious memories which we hold dear, my husband and I are talking of going fishing,never thought we would again but somehow the timing is right just to be where Mikey loved we do catch release, Congrulations one year thats quite a milestone Enjoy Dear Deb while you can. Dearest Selva, please have your sister be with you, this part is hard some of Mikeys things had to go in storage and I did it alone and cryed but somehow in time Mikeys things were needed by others but I have special belongings that are not shared but please don't do it alone. Yes you will be in my prayers daily. I wish you were going on vacation after go see Verna or Sandy for 1200.00 it would do you good to get away when you are done, will there be room at the new house so you could have a room for Solange and make it a special guest room? does it have to be right now? Lisa are you ok? Love to All & Special BearHugs tonight or I should say morning. Donna

6/27/2003 09:19

Good Morning Angel Moms,
Sorry I haven't posted lately, been in valley days too. Yesterday was 9 months since Aaron went home. My heart still will NOT accept it. I too see him in other young men and even little children. When I see one wearing the baggy shorts and tennis shoes with no socks, kinda stocky like Aaron it literally takes my breath away. And his truck, oh his little red truck, I swear I see one on almost every road I drive on. I never realized how many were out there. But his was special...he had it lowered and loud and noisy. I can still hear it driving down the road. Boy did he love his truck.
Selva, I will be storming heaven with prayers for you. I still cannot even go into Aaron's room. I had to go in there yesterday to get a blanket out of his closet and I couldn't get out fast enough. I swear I can still smell him in there. I still have his cell phone programmed into all my phones memory. Since his name starts with an A it is the first one I see when I am trying to make a call. I have been thinking that I need to take it off, but something won't let me. Not yet.
So, nice to hear from you. I am happy for you that you want to go fishing. Mikey would be proud to know that you are still continuing to do things that make you happy. And he will be right there beside you feeling you struggle with the "BIG 0NE".(lol) Love you.

6/27/2003 09:34

Deb, that is great that you are taking a vacation. Rest and Relax and enjoy! I wish I could take off. My work holds an annual conference each year for writers and this year it is in NY. I do all the registration and hotel accomodations and I am so swamped, it's not funny. But, it keeps me busy. You know what I mean?
Hi Sandy,
How are you feeling? Mouth all better? Man I hate dental work. Hey, you know in one of the emails you wrote me, you said you lived pretty close to New York. I will be in NY City from July 14th to the 20th. Do you think maybe we could meet? I will be there for work, but if it's not too far for you, I would love to meet you. Think about it and let me know. Thank you for posting on Aaron's prayer circle. I posted back to you.
Hi Verna,
Thank you for posting on both sites. How did the reunion go? I know you are probably just worn out. When you get a chance to get online please email or post about it. I'm anxious to know how it went and what everyone looked like, etc.

Where are you? Are you doing okay? I miss hearing from you.

For those of you I didn't email... I have created a prayer circle in honor of Aaron. It was really hard for me but I wanted to do something. Please check it out. It is on here (Beliefnet) under Aaron O'Neil.
Thanks and Love you all.

6/27/2003 20:54

Hi my dear sisters. Lisa, I understand what you are gong through, I pass by my house everyday and sit in Solange's room, yes I stil smell her perfume, I hug her dresses, and look at her shoes ( she love shoes so she have a lot of them), there is one with her socks in it, it has been 10 months for me, I still don't know how I am going to handle it, I know by august I will have to clean up, but I don't know how I am going to do it, I bought this big containers, but I will like to keep everything, I will talk to Juny and tell her to take some of Solange's clothes (they always shared their clothes) and I am sure Solange will like Juny to take it, but it will be hard for her too, they shared everything, so I don't know what I'm goind to do, I have a two bedroom house that I have to dismantled, and I don't know what I am going to do or how, I am sure my brother and sister will help me, but Solange's room it is up to me, I don't want anybody there, you understand , do you?, maybe just Juny and me. I am in such valley days,. I am planning to go to a retreat on Rhinebeck NY (upstate NY) by the Hudson Valley, its about Dr. Raymond Moody's workshop, I recomend that you read about his books, it will help. Well my Angel moms, I am angry, tired (did not sleep last night) hungry, the last time at ate was yesterday at 12pm, my Dr. gave a prescription for 270 pills, I have to go on thursday for a something that they put a tube through your mouth and into the intestine, bioscopy I think, and hell I could not care less if I have cancer or not. I just want to end . I'm sorry that I can not cheer you up tonight. I will try tommorrow. May God Bless You All. Love Selva

6/27/2003 21:01

Hi my sister, does this mean that your house goes on the market right away, or can it be sold within the next few months? And as Donna says, can you have a room just for Solange's things in the newly built home - not the same, I know, but at least it would still be 'her room'. I'm afraid I can't be much help to you about this, even though it's been 4 yrs., Shane's room is pretty much the same as the day he passed away. Chris has his clothes, and we have his stereo component set in the Dining Room, but other than that, it's very much the same. It's only been through this past year that we've allowed company to stay in his room without it bothering us, but we still at this time have no desire to get rid of his 'things', when the time is right for us, we will then. Shane had said a couple of times that if he died, he didn't want to 'go in the ground', so we had him cremated, and we have his remains here at home, but not in his 'room', in our bedroom, and he'll be entombed with us in a Columbareum when we pass. So all I can do is pray for you my sister, because as you can see I don't have very good advice for you in this area. God bless you my sister, I'll say extra prayers for you on this one,
Lots of love & Hugs,

6/27/2003 22:11

Hi dear Lisa, oh gosh, only 9 months yesterday, little wonder you're in deep valley days. You should have posted about it, but I understand if you didn't feel up to it. Of course you still can't accept it, it's only been 9 months, and it's still all very fresh and raw for you, give yourself plenty of time, it hasn't even been a year for you yet! Don't feel as though you have to 'push yourself', it's far more important right now to validate your grief, and let it progress at your own pace, 9 months is not long enough to be able to finally accept it, that'll come in time, so just let yourself grieve for now. Oh yes, that's one of the hardest things to deal with, when you see someone who looks so much like your child, I remember in the first couple of years 'seeing' Shane in a crowd, positive it was him, only to be brought back to reality, and the pain would bring you to your knees. My hubby was in a phone booth downtown around the 7th month mark, and he was so certain he saw Shane from the back walking, that he dropped the phone and started running after the young man, the feeling is so strong. Leave Aaron's initial on your cellphone for now, you yourself will know when it's time to remove it, as I said, it's still very early in your Journey. Yes, my mouth is all better, thanks for asking, if I don't see the Dentist for a while, it won't bother me in the least, :) I'm the biggest chicken when it comes to getting work done, don't mind cleanings, but anything else I'm a big baby, :) Yes, Lisa, I live about 45 min. from the NY border, and it would be about a 4-5 hr. drive to New York city, gosh yes, I'd love to meet you too, it'd be wonderful, I'll have to get back to you about the dates, my sister is finally going to get my niece Christened, and she's not sure of the dates either, so e-mail me and we'll know what's what about the dates! Oh, my honour to post at Aaron's site, such a beautiful picture!
Prayers and love to you,

6/27/2003 22:16

Dearest Donna, no, no web feet, finally sunshine and hot and humid! Hmm, you must be a nighthawk, or are you having trouble sleeping, the time on your post is very early. Take care dear one,
Lots of love and yes, Bear Hugssss,

6/28/2003 21:16

Hi my sister Sandy, I am in deep valley, but I just wanted to tell you GOD BLES YOU MY DEAR SISTER, 150 posts nad all because of you. Mya God Bless You Always. Love Selva

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