Prayer Circles

Hi my dear sister, yes, my headache is finally gone, it was a sinus headache, get them sometimes and when I do, it affects my eyes too, can't look at anything bright. Anyway, don't get them that often and I'm fine now! I hope you get all your anger out with the help of your therapist, yes, you're always honest and I admire that, but Selva, PUH-LEEZE don't go looking for that rapist!!! Yes, you're angry, but don't put yourself in harm's way by trying to track him down yourself! If his picture is up everywhere and everyone is keeping an eye out for him, then that's what you should only be doing, this man is very dangerous!! Now we have to worry about you, roaming the streets of Miami looking for him, ay my sister, you are stubborn, :) I'm asking Our Lord to put your Angels around you for protection! Please post tonight so we will know you're safely at home where you should be. Yes, your anger may be a build-up towards Solange's Anniversary in August, and I pray that you talk all this over with your therapist. No, I don't think you're nuts, just angry, and I'm praying that God takes away this anger and keeps you safe with your Angels around you! Love you lots my sister, so please don't do this, let the Police handle it.
Yes, Donna, if you're reading this, at the very least let us know how you're doing, our prayers are with you.
Love & Hugs my sister,
Sandy

Hi Jessy, and welcome to the Circle! That's so sweet of you to post here about your beautiful friend Solange, you and her other friends must miss her so much too! I've seen the movie "Pay It Forward", it's very good, and we should all try to do that with each other! My son Shane was the same way, always helping other's out too, so I can see how the Movie remins you so much of your dear friend. All of you look after our dear Selva, it's always wonderful when our child's friends still keep in touch! God bless you Jessy, and I know Solange is smiling brightly on all of you.
Love Sandy

Hi my angel moms, I am still lokking for the rapist, but tonight it is pouring rain, so I decided to stay home, but tommorrow I will be on search, I want to get my anger into that guy, imagine he raped one 10 years old and one 12, can you imagine what he did to their lifes, oh my sister, like I told my Dr. what I have inside not even the Incredible Hulk, could put up with me, So I will find him,and kick the hell out of him and more, but I will wait until tomorrow. Lve you my sisters. Selva

Dear Angel Moms, ~ Please help me storm heaven with prayer for the protection of our dear sister, Selva. I am afraid that the evil one is trying to possess her loving and caring spirit, and turn her away from all the progress she is making on her grief journey, even as she grieves and expresses her anger with others who can relate to that indescribable stage of grief. According to God's Holy Word, satan is crafty, and will enter our mind and spirit, and do his best to set us up and destroy us. Let us pray that God will not allow the evil one to do that to our Selva while she is in such deep valley time!

Dear heavenly Father, ... I come to You with a very, very heavy and sad heart. I am afraid for our sister, Selva. Please don't allow her to go out in harms way. Please reveal to her that the thoughts that she is entertaining are very dangerous and destructive, and that she should take Sandy's advice and not act on such thoughts. Please, God, let her know that those thoughts are not from You. :( I also ask Your forgiveness, Lord, for anything I might have said in my post to our dear sister, that might have led her to vent her anger in such a way that might bring harm to her, ... And sadness to all her loved ones and friends. Wrap Your loving arms of protection around her, dear Lord, and keep her safe and give her peaceful moments as only You can do. Lord, I pray for Eva, Lisa, and all newly bereaved moms/dads, who are just beginning on their grief journey. Please give them guidance, and moments of peace from the awful pain that they feel in their hearts. Lord, thank you for Sandy, and all the lives she has touched and helped by providing this safe place where we can come and share our grief and pain. I pray that You will continue to bless this wonderful and caring circle of love, dear Lord, and lead others to come and share their story with us, so that we can pray for them also. Lord, like many of the other angel moms, I don't remember how I found this wonderful prayer circle, but I do feel in my heart that You led me to it, and for that, I will always be grateful! Lord, please continue to use us to do Your work, as we make an effort to share with and counsel our newly bereaved moms. Again, Lord, I ask that you wrap Your arms around each angel mom and send them a sign to let them know that their child/children are alive in heaven forevermore, and will be waiting for us, once our work here is done! Please continue to help us to do Your will! These things I ask, ... In Jesus' name, Amen!

DEAR SELVA,

PLEASE BE VERY CAREFUL AND I WISH AND HOPE YOUR NOT GOING ALONE??? WE WOULDN'T WANT ANYTHIG TO HAPPEN TO YOU. LIKE VERNA AND SANDY SAID HIS PICTURE IS EVERY WHERE AND HE WILL BE CAUGHT BUT SOME TIMES IT JUST TAKES TIME. SORRY TO HEAR HE DIDTHIS O 2 YOUNG CHILDREN AND I NOW HOW ANGRY YOU ARE LIKE MY HUSBAND SAYS THE MAN IS VERY SICK AND HAS NO LIFE TO GO AFTER CHILDREN HE IS A SICK PIECE OF HUMAN BEING. I WILL STORM THE HEAVENS FOR YOUR SAFTY. LOVE AND PRAYERS TO YOU.

LOVE DEBBY

HI SANDY,

YES MY DAD IS DOING GOOD. I WAS SO HAPPY TO HEAR THAT WHEN I HD TALKED TO HIM LAST WEEK. I HAVE DECIDED NOT TO WORK AT THE DAYCARE THIS SUMMER AND TAKE IT EASY. JUST DO MY CLASS AT NIGHT AND THEN JULY 31 IS MY FINAL AND THEN I'M FREE UNTIL AUGUST 28TH. THIS IS THE FIRST TIME IN 15 YEARS THAT I HAVE NOT WORKED IN THE SUMMER. I HAVE A FRIEND WHO HAS THE SLEEP AMNIA AND WEARS THE MASK AT NGHT. MY DAD IS GOING TO LOVE THAT. HE DOESN'T LIKE WEARING THE OXYGEN MASK NOW. HE WILL HAVE TO GET USED TO IT. I'M GLAD TO HEAR YOU ARE DOING BETTER AND I LOVE THE WAYS VERNA AND SELVA TOOK OVER FOR YOU WHILE YOU WHERE SICK. THEY DID SUCH A GREAT JOB. I DON'T THINK I WOULD OF HAD THE COURAGE TO DO IT FOR YOU THE WAY THEY DID. GLAD TO HAVE OU BACK. LOVE AND PRAYERS TO YOU.

LOVE DEBBY

DEAR VERNA,

I LOVE YOR POEMS AND PRAYERS THATYOU POST. THEY ALWAYS BRING TEARS TO MY EYES. YOU KNOW JUST THE RIGHT WORDS TO GET TO THE POINT ON HOW WE PARENTS FEEL AND THE HURTING WITH ANGER WE ARE HOLDING INSIDE. I KNOW IN DO TIME IT WILL ALL COME OUT. I HOPE YOUR FEELING BETTER TOO. LOVE AND PRAYER TO YOU.

LOVE DEBBY

DER DONNA,

I HOPE AND PRAY THAT YOUR SISTER IS DOING BETTER. PLEASE COME AND POST TO LET US KNOW HOW SHE IS DOING AND HOW YOU ARE DOING. WE MISS YOUR BIG BEAR HUGS. PRAYERS TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY.

LOVE DEBBY

Dear Selva, I am so sorry for trying to redirect your anger... I meant well, but I realize now that the advice I gave to you, I gave it much too soon! So, I ask that you please forgive me for being too eager to try to help you learn to deal with all the anger that you have building up inside. For you, it is much too soon! It would have been too soon for me or any angel Mom. Sometimes, I have a tendency to try to share words of wisdom before a Mom is ready or able to accept it. I had to admit, once I went back and read my post to you, I realized that I was imposing my beliefs of today on you, or trying to tell you how to grieve! Even though I meant well, it was not fair to you to give such advice at a time when you need to be able to grieve at your own pace and in your own way! You are still in shock and disbelief! And besides, you have an anniversary coming up, and that is always difficult for all angel moms. If you are still angry at God, then know that it is OK! Selva, ... I am still in the learning stage when it comes to trying to give advice to the newly bereaved. I have to remind myself that no two people's grief experience is the same. Also, I had to remind myself that it took a very long time for me to learn how to redirect my anger at God. Therefore, I ask that you ignore that untimely advice. Do what works best for you! Grieve in your own way, and take a step forward only when you are ready! The anger you feel at God is something we all can relate to. So, don't try to rush through it or redirect your anger until you are ready. And, if you never get ready, that is still OK, because God understands. Therefore, take your time and continue to express your anger in your own way for as long as you feel the need to! I would much rather you express your anger at God, who loves you, than to know that you are tracking down a rapist, whom you know has already done so much harm to innocent victims. Please, stay safe, and out of harms way! :) If you cannot do it for yourself, then, please do it for the sake of your family and all angel moms whom you know love you! I just wish I could take away some of your grief and pain ... but I cannot. Only God can do that. So, I will just continue to pray heartfelt prayers for you... Asking God to send you a sign that your beautiful Solange is OK. I know that will bring you so much joy! God hears all prayers and answers them in His own time and in His own way. We cannot rush Him. The waiting is hard, but it will be well worth it when you finally get to see and hug your Solange in your dreams!
Love and BearHugs to all.
Verna

Dear Deb, ~ Thanks for your kind words. It means so much to me to be of help to our all our angel moms. As you know, no one can relate to the depth of our pain like another angel Mom who has know such indescribable grief and pain. When I make my presentation at the DUI meetings, I always tell the offenders that there exists a level of grief that the world knows nothing about. Only one who has lost a child/children can relate to the level of grief we angel moms have known. Thank you for your advice to our Selva and for your prayers. Good to know that your Dad is doing good. I continue to keep you and your entire family in my prayers. I also am glad to know that you are going to take some much deserved time off for yourself. You deserve a break! :) Thanks, Deb, I don't know what I would have done had it not been for Selva's help. I just wish she knew how much she means to all of us and this circle of love. So thanks for joining us in praying for her. Believe it or not, I worry about Selva and all of you angel moms as if you all were my children. :)I think of you all as my extended & very special angel family.:) I don't know what I would do if something were to happen to any of you! That is why I am so worried about our dear Selva. I also worry about Eva and Lisa a lot, and also Donna and her sister. And, it always lifts my spirit to come here and find a post, update on your Dad's condition, and sometimes, even one of your poems that you share. Thanks also, Deb, for your prayer for me, my family, and my health. I am doing my best to rest more, take my meds, and count my many blessings daily... Which always includes family and friends. I have been very busy with the class reunion planning, which is being held June 26 - 29, 2003. Two of my classmates lost loved ones as recent as this week. One lost her daughter, and the other lost a brother. Both funerals are later today. One is at 11:00 AM and the other is at 1:00 AM. Having lost many loved ones and dear friends, through the years, I try daily to express love & hugs to both as often as possible ... For, we never know what tomorrow will bring.
Love & BigWarmBearHugs to All! :)
Verna

Angel Moms, most of my emails to Lisa are being returned "Unknown." If any of you can provide me with Aaron's memorial site, I would really appreciate it very much.

Lisa, I hope all is well with you and family. I responded to your email on yesterday, but did not receive the one with the information I requested. I will be so glad when all the problems with emails get worked out.

Eva, Donna, we miss you and need to know that you are OK. :) You will always be in our thoughts and prayers. Love and prayers go out for your dear sister, also.
Love & BigBearHugs,
Verna

Yvonne, ~ Loved your most recent post and prayer. Come visit whenever you can. You and family are always in our prayers.

Barb, It's been quite a while since we've heard from you. I think of you often and pray that your pain and loss of your Carol is becoming a little easier to bear.

To all angel moms/dads and angel Mom/dad supporters, and other relatives and friends: Please know that you are covered daily in our prayers ... For, we pray for all who have lost a dear loved one or friend! We appreciate your sharing of post/poetry and your prayers!
Love & Hugs,
Verna

Hi my Angel sisters, please do not worry so much about me, I am fine, I have not been able to go out and look for the sonofa.....because it has been poring rain here in Miami, but do not worry I will not do anything foolish, and Verna, please please please, you don't have to feel guilty about anything, and if you knew my sister, she knows how impulsive I am, specially when I get angry, but just to mean people, one day this old cranky guy was parked in front of my sister's house, and she has planted a little tree in fron of the house, and the mean guy parked his car just on top of it, Solange and I were here visiting my sister, we all waited fro the guy to come and get his car, when he came, my sister very politely told him to please be careful when he park not to kill that little plant, do you know what he did, he run over and over the plant and cursed at my sister, I got so angry that I went into my car (I used to have a gun in my purse all the time to protect Solange) so I followed him very closed all over Miami, the guy started to get nervous and will curse at me everytime I got close, he finally gave up and park at a very busy mall and I parked my car just behind his and came out of the car, the guy almost pissed in his pants, then I realized he was old and just a cranky guy, when he saw the gun, he almost fainted, so I just told him the next time he parks better be carefull where he does it otherwise hi will not find his car never again, I even told him a was a cop. Si he ask forgivenes and said he wont doi it again, will you believe he was a patient of a Dr, whose office is the corner of the house, I was him a couple of times after that and he would wave at me and say hello, when I came back home Solange and Nancy were so nervous that I promised i will not do it again, then they laughed when I told then their story.So you see, I will do nothing that will harm anybody, so Verna, please don't feel bad, I promised, been that you are so worry that I will just keep an eye on the guy, and will not do anything drastic, if I see him I promise, first I will call 911 and then punch him. I love you my sisters. Selva
Deb what a nice surprise to see you posting, I am so glad that your dad is doing much better and that you will take a vacation, we really miss you, so now I hope that we hear from you more often, love Selva

Hello sister angelmoms...today not a good day...I should be rejoicing in the fact that my transfer went through..my last day at the prison will be june 30th..then I start my new job (closer to home) on july 1st..I will be "babysittin" convicts who are prerelease....the satillite houses up to 75 inmates..but at this time we only have 62..it will be a less stressful job...though I am not going to like working 12 hours though...right now I'm working 8am-4pm...my new hours will be 6pm-6am..I will feel like a vampire again...I used to work 12 midnight to 8am...up until last year before my Matthew was killed...I'm afraid so much these days....of what I don't know....my seems to thinkk I am doing "fine" I think I need to see another doc..my mind plays so many tricks on me...I feel like I'm not safe anymore...the unit I work at right now is a max security...so that means inmates are lockdown 24-7..but at this new place I'm going to ...well inmates will be able to walk around freely..I'm not saying I'm afraid to be around them...it's just I'm not so ssure I can hold up around them walking around me..even though they are considered"safe" and not known to be trouble makers..since they have a short period of time before they are released...I just hope and have been praying that I have not made a mistake....I will surely miss sleeping with Ron on the nights I have to work...that alone itself makes me crazy..I just don't know anything anymore....my oldest daughter Lydia will be having her second child next month.please pray for a safe delivery and a healthy new babygirl...My middle daughter Mary still in the service...well thr reserve I should say...stationed in louisana(fort polk) I miss her so much...she comes home when she can...Ohh Selva....when I looked at the picture you sent me of her...ohhhh hpw my heart just ached for you...for my Mare looks so much like your Solange..God love you and keep you sweetheart....I worry so much for you...Please don't do anything foolish...I need to go...my headaches are getting more and more painful..just gonna take me a tyleenol pm...and lay down...Ron says I need to tell Doc about my everyday headaches...but you know..it really does'nt matter....nothing matters....I love you all.and I continue to pray for you all...Lisa....hold on hun...hold on as hard as you can....In His Arms I Hold On....Eva

Hi my dear Eva, what a relief reading your post, Fist of all, God will be with you, second if those immates are ready to go out I'm sure they will behave so they will come out, so you are not in that terrible prison where there are so bad, so you are with the less bad, Thnk God my sister, I'm sure you will dot have that many problems. I thank God because i and all our sister pray for you all the time. Let God do His Job, and He will be taking you out of all that evil enviorment. Please take care of your headaches, I'm sure that is due to the stress we all going through, but get some help aboutit. You know we miss you at the Circle of Love and we are all praying for you Love you my sister and keep on pressing on, We all do. Love Selva

Dear Selva and all Angel Moms,
Selva, I have read your last postings on here and honestly I don't blame you. I see why you are so angry and that you want to re-direct your anger to someone as bad as the rapist. Many people here are looking for him, but you just do your part. I don't think you should go alone "looking" for him, it's too danjerous. The policce are already searching for him, but the are armed and protected, they have been trained for this kind of stuff. If you happen to see him, then call the cops, but don't you dare confront him. Many people love you here including Solange, and none of us want you to get hurt.
Angel moms I can only imagine all the pain you are all going through and my prayers are always with all of you. Ever since Solange went to heaven I am more worried about cars and feel that death can be just around the corner for anyone. Everytime anyone in the house takes too long to get home I start panicking. Well I want to thak you all for taking care of Selva, she needs everyone's support, just like you all do. It is beautiful to see how you all help each other and form a "circle of love" all toghether.I know God has to be looking after all of you, after all, you found out about this site and now have more people to relate to and who share your pain. This website is a blessing for many and I know God put it in our way for it to serve as therapy, support and love.
Take care angel moms, and help each other the most you can.
Love you Selva, your other daughter,
-Jessy-

Dearest Angel Moms, Hi, I know its been a long time and I am sorry for all the worry but I got the news Friday about my sister I was hoping to have a good report. I would understand if your angry but I couldn't add more sorrow and I wasn't dealing well with my own feelings, my sister's report is not good but there isn't a name to what is happening or it hasn't defined itself well enough yet Shar is using a walker there using quinine as a possible help but it really makes her ill I did see her Thursday and was able to spend time and brought some things she likes for me I had three injections of different sorts Tues but at least I'm truly hoping for the last time, and food is still not agreeing but my journey is over with shots and now just need time to recover for awhile I cryed alot and felt it was best done alone Your prayers and support helped me and I'm sorry I wasn't here for you and Sandy, Selva Verna Lisa THANK YOU and I do hope you will forgive me but I couldn't talk out or write out Lisa I don't know if you ever got my e-mails because Yahoo said at both addresses you didn't exist but I kept trying. I felt the Best I could do was to send my Love and not my sorrow and Selva you can trying throwing some of your anger at me and PLEASE listen to those you can and I hope it rains every night till they catch him but PLEASSSSSSSSSSSE don't do this when I was going through all this I kept praying for all of you and Selva along with my sister your on 24/7 Please think of your sister how would she survive if anything happened to you or your brother I know who am I to talk but I don't care be angry kick a pillow cry and pray for the children and yell at me for awhile ok, Love&BearHugs Donna

Hello dear Deb, gosh yes, that was wonderful news about your Dad, and it helps to put your mind at ease and not be so worried, especially your Mom also!
Good for you Deb, taking the 1st summer off in 15 years, you deserve it! Take some time for yourself, relax, soak up the sun, and I imagine you also want to work on your land and house. Uh-oh, :) if your Dad does have sleep apnea and has to wear the special mask like my friend, it does take some getting used to, so if he didn't like the oxygen mask, he probably won't like this either in the beginning, but it's a must, and I'm sure his Dr. will explain how important it is to wear it! Thanks Deb, yes, I'm feeling much better and YES, Verna and Selva did do a wonderful job of looking after the Circle, I'm blessed that they were there for me and very grateful for their help! Deb, you do have a lot of courage, but I know with the long hours you put in during the day and then school at night that you just can't post as often, but once school is done, hope to see more of you, you always post so lovingly to everyone, and we all love the poems that you put on these pages! Prayers and love to you too, my friend,
Love Sandy

Hello our dear Verna, that's right, your High School Reunion is coming up, and I know you put a lot of effort and planning into it, so it should be a terrific time! Take lots of pics. Oh gee, that's too bad about your two classmates, God love them, and both funerals yesterday, so very sad. May Our Lord comfort them both and their families.
Hmm, I can't remember the URL for Aaron's Memorial Site either, it's somewhere in the back pages, but just where I can't remember. Lisa, if you're reading this page, please post Aaron's address again for all? Verna, Lisa's e-mail address at home is LimaBean@houston.rr.com Or is it AOL acting up on you again? You'll have to let us all know how the Reunion went!
Much love to you, our dear Miss V,
Sandy

Hello my dear sister, you can see that everyone is worried about you because we all love you and want you to stay safe! Yes, I saw the story of him last night on America's Most Wanted, a man like that makes everyone angry, and I pray the Police catch him very soon! You just promised that you wouldn't go looking for him, that you'll call 911 if you see him, so NO going near him to punch him in the nose! Do as Donna suggests and kick a pillow, just keep your promise and stay away from him if you encounter him. I hope it rains all week there, :). I'm kidding, but we all just want you to be safe!
Well, we have the 3 H's here today, hot, hazy and humid, so I'm going for a swim as soon as I'm caught up, hope you're enjoying your pool today yourself!
Lots of love & prayers
dear sister,
Sandy

Hi dear Eva, it's terrific to see you posting! I'm so happy for you that you received your transfer, I'm sure it will be better working conditions because as you say, these men are getting ready for release, and will want to be on their best behaviour not to jeopardize their upcoming freedom.
Goodness yes, if you're still not feeling well, and suffering from anxiety so much, go see another Dr., I agree with Selva, your headaches are probably due to stress and another Dr. will be better able to help you, especially now. Oh, that's wonderful about your daughter due next month, yes, we'll pray for a healthy baby and easy delivery, and you keep posting, we worry when we don't hear from you. Keep pressing on, and know that our love and prayers are always with you,
Love & Hugs,
Sandy

Hi my Angel moms: First af all,THANK YOU MY DEAR GOD, we heard from Donna, I've been worried sick about you, not knowing how you were and your sister, I am so sorry the test came out doubtful, but see, there is still hope, they will find out for sure, we will keep storming Heaven for you both,you made my day.
Hi Jessy and welcome to the Circle of Love, now after reading our posts you will understand a little better about our pain, but you are to young to be envolved into so much pain, I am so glad that you are been careful about your driving, after all, Solange left all of you a message and a mission, and I pray that all of you keep her in mind anc complete your mission, Love you my daughter and please keep on taking care of yourself. love you MOM.
Verna I'm sorry about your friends, and you going through that pain, I will be praying for God to give you strengh, and yes please let us know how your Reunion went, I wish it will be a very emotional one. Now let me explain to you all, I will not go out again to look for this guy, I am so sorry I have caused so much worry, just for that i promise that I will not do it, My sister and I went out today , because she convinced me that that rat its not in Miami anymore, with all the publicity he probably left by now and went back to mexico or nicaragua, so she decided to buy me a punching bag and that is why we went out, with gloves and all, this way I take my anger into the punching bag, I think it is a good idea, so please my sisters don't worry about me, I will be fine. Love you and forgive me for causing so much worry. Love Selva

Hi my sister, I want to tell you about Jessy. She is one of Solange's best friends, a very young girl full of love, she used to stay at my house when "the group" will go out dancing, they will drive me crazy changing clothes 3 and 4 times until they will look just right, but I enjoyed, you can tell what a wonderful girl she is by visiting our Circle of Love, I will pray to God that she will have a wonderful life. Selva

Hi Jessy, nice to see you posting again, and giving good advice to Selva!
You must miss Solange so much yourself and I know you must be a comfort to her dear Mom. Thank you for your kind words and especially your prayers, yes, this is a Circle of Love as we call it, and I know that Our Lord has blessed it mightily over the years. You take care too, Jessy, and once again thank you for your prayers for all, may Our Heavenly Father bless you in whatever way He knows you need,
Love Sandy

Hello dear Donna, everyone will be happy to see your post, all have been wondering how you're doing, so they'll be relieved and not angry. Just look at Selva's post to you! We're all happy that your Journey is over, but that's sad about your sister, I pray they find a diagnosis soon and know better how to treat her. And thankfully she has you for support and love. Try not to be a stranger around here, post whenever you feel like it, you know by now that we're used to dealing with sorrow, of any kind, and our prayers are with you and your family,
Peace, Hope & Joy,
Love Sandy