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Shane Whalen
This Prayer Circle is Dedicated to my son Shane Whalen Who Passed Away On March 15, 1999 at the Age of 24, & All Other Children

Start a prayer circle for bereaved parents who have lost a child.

There are many of us out there who have lost a child, and it is devastating. It changes the outlook on life, plunges you into a depression, and you think that the feelings and thoughts you have nobody else could possibly relate to. I think a prayer circle for bereaved parents would only benefit us and help us on our journey of grief. This Circle is one of Love, where a Grieving Parent can safely come to for Prayers, and to talk about their feelings.

Shaner -10/14/2000
send to a friend

Read Prayers.

6/11/2003 21:02

Hello my dear sister, I know, I know, but I am feeling better today and besides, I miss ya's! What I wouldn't do for a big plate of the Cuban Stew you gave me the recipe for!! Tired of eating only soup, so tonight I had hot sausage and peppers, my throat isn't that sore anymore!! Thanks so much for adding Vickie to your prayers, she is of course devastated, so prayers for her are much appreciated. Oh Selva, you make me laugh, saying God is tired of listening to you and get this woman out of here, ha, ha, I know He must be laughing Himself, hearing you say that!
He NEVER gets tired of hearing from you, He loves your prayers, and the more He hears from you, the more He loves it!! Thank you for all the beautiful cards you've sent me, yes, you are a sweetie with a big loving heart, and I'm so happy God led you here too!! That's a very good idea to have an appt. with your psychotherapist on Solange's Anniversary, and you know we'll all be here for you too, my dear sister. Oh, isn't that wonderful that the Agency may review their rules, especially when both people want to meet, what harm could it do, it would only help! In the meantime, my prayers are with you that you find Don yourself, or he finds you, what a beautiful reunion it would be!! Yes, please let us know when it happens, we'll all be so happy for you! Yes, Solange is a beautiful young lady, and as Lisa says, bet she looks like her Mom! Lots of love & prayers to you my dear sister,
Love Sandy - oh and a Bear Hug too!

6/11/2003 21:10

Hello faithby50, welcome to the Circle. Thanks so much for posting the comforting Scripture, and your much appreciated prayers. I'm sorry also about the loss of your niece, I pray her parents are doing alright, God love them. May Our Heavenly Father bless you in whatever way He knows you need,
Love Sandy

6/11/2003 22:21

Hello our dear Lisa, yes, keep pressing on, and we're all here to help you with it, through the valley days and the good days, which will slowly start to become more frequent! I hope you had a good session with your therapist, sometimes it's hard to 'open up', and I pray that you'll become more comfortable with him/her, and that'll make it easier for you. Oh Lisa, you're not crazy, as you say yourself, reading the posts from the Moms shows you just how normal you are in your grieving, and I'm so happy that it helps you! Yes, ha, ha, we probably have images in our minds of each other, much the same as when you listen to your favourite Radio Station and have a 'mental picture' in your mind of the DJ, or host. Yes, it'd be wonderful if we could all meet, Selva wants us to go to Miami so she can treat us to some good Cuban food, hopefully one day it'll become a reality!! I live in Kingston, Ont., Canada, and the rest of the Moms are scattered around the US, but regardless of miles and distance, we're all together in heart and love, and as I said, hopefully we'll all meet in person and oh, what a time that would be, wouldn't it! Lots of love and Bear Hugsss to you dear Lisa,
Love Sandy

6/12/2003 05:03

Dearest Angel Moms, Tonight I write with a Heavy Heart and I'm sorry to do so, I Love You and Thankyou for all your support and will Cherish my time with you, My sister needs me and as soon as I recover I will be with her to help care for her, the test came back and they don't know why but the nerves in her body are damaged and progressing fast why they don't know still need more answers but they can not undo what is happening. Maybe my time here was to prepare me for this journey and my family needs me too. I know this sounds sad but I learned from Mikeys Journey that it is an Honor to care for another in this way, that it is a Blessing to do so, You have all taught me so much so I may give more and have courage and Faith for it is all written here within this Haven. My prayers and a peice of Me will always be with you and with all my Heart Thankyou for your Love & Support and I will always Remember. I have kept a folder of cards and letters and will read them and remember that God Granted me All of You. You are in my Heart Always & My Prayers so in Spirit I will never be Far. May God Grant You Peace and Bless You Mightly. Love Forever and a Day and BEARHUGS ALWAYS Donna

6/12/2003 18:37

My dear sister Donna, AY I'm so sad, I just don't know what to say, but there is one thing you and your sister will be in my prayers 24/7 and this time I don't care if God tells them get this woman out of here, I will keep on praying , please the minute you can get into a computer, let us know how you and your sister are doing. I'm sure all the Angel moms will be storming Heaven for you. Please, please, my sister, let us know. Love you Selva

6/12/2003 18:40

Hi lisa, I hope by now you received my e mails, but in front of everybody here, I will tell you again, I made a stupid mistake and beg you to forgive me. I love you my dear sister, and I certainly don't want to give you more sorrow, we have all we can take. Love you my sister. Selva

6/12/2003 18:53

My dear sisters Verna and Sandy, I'm keeping an eye on you, Verna you are overdoing it, remember ????? you have to take care of yourself for all of us and your family, Sandy I HOPE that you are feeling better, eating sausages and peppers sounds "GOOD" to me, so I'm sure that you are feeling a little bit better but please don't over do it.
Lisa, my sister and I are going through the process of constructing a house behind my sister's house, we are still in the process of permits, plans and all that, but I think by the end of the year (GODS' WILL)we will have the house, so that means, we will have one house with 2 bedrooms bathrooms and another one with one bedroom one bathroom, so we can all meet here, sleeping bags will be welcome, I will cook Cuban food, and show you around Miami which is really a beautiful city, we will share photos, memories, sorrows, and whatever, and we will see each other and hug, I think that will be so great, the minute the house its up, I will make a plan (I'm an accountant) and we will help each other, of course room and board and plenty of food will be my pleasure, so the airplane ticket is what we have to worry about, Ay what a wonderful thing, Verna will read to us about her book, we will share photos and memories, I will take you to Miami Beach (great beach), we will cry together and we will laugh together, so I'm in. The minute I'll have the constructor's date, i will let you know, I'm sure if we all get together you will not mind sleeping a little unconfortable, but I will make sure that everyone is comfortable and surrounded by love. I love you my sisters. Selva

6/13/2003 09:08

Hi Selva,
Meeting in Miami sounds "GREAT" to me. That is so nice of you to offer a place to sleep and food. I will help out any way I can. I'm an accountant too! So I know about making plans. please please count me in! I can't wait. By the way, how are you feeling? Did your colon problem cease? I did receive your email and like I said in my reply there is no need to be forgiven. I understood what you meant completely.

Oh, I hate to hear that you are leaving us, but hopefully it will only be for a short while. Like Selva said as soon as you can get to a computer please post and let us know how you and your sister are doing. My prayers are with you. You have been such an inspiration for me, I will miss you deeply. Please try to keep in touch somehow. If you want I can send my address and phone number and maybe we can contact each other by snail mail or phone. I do not want to lose contact with you, my friend. We will all storm heaven with prayers for you.

I am SO glad to hear that you are eating something else besides soup. That can get old quick, lol. Cuban stew sounds great to me too. (haven't had breakfast yet..)and talking about food is making me really hungry. Canada sounds like a great place to live are you french? How long have you lived there? What's the weather like? We have been breaking records of heat down here and let me tell you it is really really hot. Its just so humid here, yuk. My therapist appt. went pretty good, for some reason she can get me to open up??? I really like her. Thanks for asking. I am praying for you to fully recover quickly. God Bless you and your family.

Eva, Where are you? I am really worried about you. Please post and let us know how you are doing. If you still have my number you can call me. I am praying for you.

Love to all of you,

6/13/2003 09:36

HI Verna,
I did get your email, so that must mean that they are coming through okay!! Yea, I was worried that I was missing some of them. Thank you for your prayers and please know that you are also in mine. Love 2 U

6/13/2003 11:39

I have been reading now for almost 2 hours. My heart goes out to all the parents that have lost a precious child. I lost my niece in a house fire on 11/2/03. This has devastated our family. Ashlie was the one who keep us all laughing and made all our family functions even better, with her smiling face. The pain that we all feel is fresh and the anger is there. The question is "WHY". Why take so many young ones that have just begun to know what life is all about. At Ashlie's party, (this is what we called her funeral) some one made the comment that "God lend us a Angel for 17 years." I believe this is true. God has a plan for each and every one of us. We never know when our time has come. So cherish the time that we have with each other. If I could I would take all the pain and hurt from my sister and brother in law and weigh the burden on my shoulders. I pray for all the pain that is in your hearts, that time will lessen, and hold fast to the thought that we all still have a piece of the heart that has been taken from us. May God be with each and every one of us, while we learn to adjust to the hurt.

6/13/2003 16:23

Hi dear Angel Moms, we are all so sad that our dear Donna has to leave, she truly IS an inspiration to us all, and forever left her mark here at this Circle. I selfishly want her back, but I know that she has and is going through so much with her illness, wanting to spend more time with her family, and now helping her dear sister Shar. We were blessed mightily by her presence here, her comforting, loving posts, and we'll never forget Bear Hugs, will we! She knows she has an open invitation to come back here anytime, but in the meantime she will be sorely missed. Our love and prayers will always be with her, we all love you dear Donna, and will never forget you, you have left a piece of your heart here with us! Lots of love, Angel Mom, and yes, Bear Hugssss too,
Love always, your sisters here.

6/13/2003 17:00

Hi dear Lisa, oooh yes, Selva's recipe for the Cuban Stew is delicious! I can't remember the name of it right now, but Selva will know. I love soup, but if I don't see a bowl of it in a while, it won't bother me, ha, ha!
YES, Canada is a great place to live, and where I live, Kingston, Ont., it's the oldest city in Canada, so we have a lot of great architecture, Museums, Art Galleries, and it's situated on the shores of Lake Ontario, so there's also plenty of boating, yachting, and water activities and parks. We are a big tourist town in the summer, we're only 45 mins. away from the NY border, so we get a lot of US visitors! No, I'm not French, but I can speak it and write it, had to learn it when I worked in the Gov't. I was born here, but in another city, our Capital, Ottawa, and all of our family on both sides still live there, it's a 2 hr. drive away. That's where our Chris now lives and works. Oooohh, I know what you mean, I love the heat, but hate the humidity! That's when the A/C comes on and/or I go for a swim! But of course today, it's raining here again, :).
Oh, I'm so happy your therapist appt. went so well, and you're able to open up, she must be very good and I'm glad you're getting some help, I had to also, and luckily I had a good one too.
Ah, thank you sweetie for your prayers, I feel much better now, thank you all for your prayers and mail. Well, I'd better start Dinner, lots of love to you dear Lisa,
Love & Bear Hugsss,

6/13/2003 17:05

Hello dwaymoth, and welcome to the Circle. I'm so very sorry to read about your niece, what a terrible tragedy. Please forgive me at the moment, I have to go prepare Dinner, but we Moms will write to you asap.
Love Sandy

6/13/2003 20:22

Hi my dear Angel moms. Lisa THANK YOU SO MUCH, for you understanding, I feel better about it, you have no idea what I went through, but Thank God you are an Angel Mom and you know how to forgive, Than you my sister, I will not make that mistake again. Sandy the name of the cuban stew is AJIACO, all the caribean countries do it with a different name, wow I can not wait for our reunion, I will cook anything you want, cuban food will be my best but remember I grew up in this country so if you want American food, I also know how to prepared it, but I think cuban food will make a little diference. Verna you are keeping quiet, I'm wondering about you and all your projects, are you taking care of your arms ? I hope so. Sandy, I'm sure Canada is a great place, when I used to live in NY I will visited Canada as far as Montreal, but I'm sure where you lice it is beautiful, I felt in love with Canada the various times I was there, I went for the first time in 1967, they had a World something, I can not remember. In Miami, in the summer it is very hot and humid, but in the winter we have all the canadians visitors coming over, because it is nice maybe 70's , they call them the snowbirds, so I think we will make our reunion in the winter, this way you can get away from the snow and the cold. Are you up for it? Lisa is, and by that time our sister Donna maybe she can join us too. We have to check on Verna, and know what she thinks. Love you my sisters. Eva please post. Selva

6/13/2003 20:27

Hello DWAYMOTH, and welcome to the Circle of Love, I'm so sorry about your niece, you and your family will be in our prayers, I lodt my only daughter Solange, 20 years old, to a car accident, no alcohol involved, she felt sleep, Aug 15, 2002, so my pain it is to raw, but keep coming back to this circle and if they can , have her mother and father join you here, they will find understanding, prayers and love,. My prayers will go out to you and your family for that terrible loss of your 17 years old niece, if there is anything we can do for her parents and you, we are all here to pray for one another, so please keep coming back here. Love you Selva

6/13/2003 20:30

Hello dwaymoth, I apologize for just getting back now. As I said, welcome to the Circle, and my heart goes out to your sister, brother-in-law, you and other family and friends over the loss of your precious niece Ashlie so tragically. Ashlie sounds like a beautiful young girl, whose loving spirit spread laughter and sunshine around. There is no pain more profound in this world than that of a parent losing a child. It's a unique loss and has a pain of it's own. It's been so recent for Ashlie's parents and you, that your grief and their's is still very, very fresh and raw. They are so blessed to have you with them for love and support during the grieving process. The big question "Why" is one that we may have to wait ourselves, when our time comes. My personal belief is that all of us are sent here with a purpose, purposes and 'work' or a Mission to accomlish. When our purposes, work, Mission is over, however short or long that may be, we are called back home. Feeling anger is a very normal part of grief, we feel anger at other's, anger at God, anger and guilt at ourselves, but in time, and by leaning heavily on God, the anger passes. Losing a child is a rollercoaster filled with emotions, and we even question our own sanity at times, but believe me, it's the unbearable pain that makes us feel that way, all the emotions you feel are very normal. It's important to remember that love never dies, it's Eternal, a bond that even death can't break, so Ashlie's love is still there for her parents, you, other family, just as their love is still and always will be, with her! Yes, I agree wholeheartedly with you, it's important to make and cherish the time we spend with family, friends, that time makes the memories that last a lifetime, and we never know when that lifetime will be up. Thank you so much for posting here, and your prayers, we truly appreciate them, and after reading here for 2 hrs., God love you, I pray you found some comfort and some better understanding, that will help you, and help you also to support your sister and brother-in-law. Our love, support, understanding and compassion are with Ashlie's parent and you, and all will be prayed for. Please post back again anytime you want to, we all care here.
Love Sandy

6/13/2003 21:01

Hello my dear sister, YES, that's the name, I knew it started with an A but wasn't sure of the complete spelling! Gosh it's good, and yes, I want to taste more Cuban dishes, but, we don't want to keep you in the kitchen when we finally do get together!! Oh, that's nice that you have visited here, I know what you're talking about, in 1967 we celebrated the 100th Birthday of our country (even though it's older than that) and we had a World Expo in Montreal as part of our celebration! Our neighbours downstairs are Snowbirds, they spend from Nov. to April in Florida, and the other 6 months here, once the weather gets hot.
Getting away from the snow for a while sounds like a nice idea and I will definitely let you know! You're such a sweetie, offering your place to everyone! Well, my favourite tv show just started, so I'm off to watch it, love you my dear sister, now you have the weekend to rest up and relax!
Lots of love & Bear Hugsss,

6/14/2003 18:32

Hi my Angel sisters, I'm in deep valley days, tommorrow will be 10 months since Solange was born to Heaven, tonight was the tragict day that she had the accident, I can not cope with it, I'm going nuts, all I do is crying and getting angry, please put a little prayer for me. Thank you my sisters. I love you Selva

6/14/2003 20:57

Oh, Dear Selva, I am praying very hard for you. I know your heart is feeling heavy. From what all the other Angel Moms that have more time than you and I say, crying and anger are part of the healing process. I know it doesn't feel like it to us but maybe it is something we must go through before we can have any kind of acceptance of our tragedies. I know I DONT want to accept it at all yet and you are only 2 months ahead of me. I just keep thinking this is all a bad bad dream and he will come home anytime now as I am sure you are too. It hurts so badly...I wish I was there to give you a great big hug and we could cry together. Cry until no more tears will come. I love you and am storming heaven with prayers as I write. Hang in there!
Love, Lisa

6/14/2003 21:04

Welcome dwaymoth,
This is a great circle friends who know exactly how you feel. Please feel free to come and post here anytime. There is usually someone online just about anytime of the day and night(we have a few night owls). All you can do is be there for your family and pray for guidance. You will all need each other more now than ever. When you have a child die there is a part of you that dies with them. We all ask why and I guess we will never know until we are called home too.(but I still keep asking...)
God Bless you and your family and remember Ashlie as the happy girl she is!

6/14/2003 21:05

Oh my dear sister, you go ahead and let your pain out, we're here for you, I understand that you're feeling so down with tomorrow being the 10th month mark, it's only natural, 10 months isn't very long when you've lost a child. I wish so much that I could hold you and let you cry, I hope your dear sister is there with you and you're not alone. You WILL get through it dear sister, and you know you're not going nuts as you put it, it's just a very painful time for you right now, reliving it all. You know that we'll pray for you, we all love you and are standing strong beside you and our Heavely Father hears our prayers for you and your pain. Try to rest easy, take a nice warm bath, and go to bed early if you can, and please post back whenever you feel like it, My love and prayers are always with you dear sister, and you're not alone,
Much love & Hugs,

6/15/2003 09:33

Hello my dear sister, I wasn't online last night so I didn't get your messages until this morning, God love you, yes, sweetie, today is the 15th of the month, 10 months since you're precious Solange passed away, and the 51st month for us - I just had to write out another Father's Day Card for my hubby from Shane, and it's still very hard.
My dear sister, my prayers are not more important than your's, yes, God hears all prayers, and He hears your's and loves your's just as much as He loves mine or anybody else's! You are still very fresh in your grief, 10 months are not very long, and everything is still very fresh and painful to you. You have to give yourself time, and let your pain out, as you are doing, thank goodness. These special days bring back all the events surrounding our child's passing, we relive it, and yes, it is very painful, and today you're in that deep pain, the pain that tears at your heart, which is already broken, but in time, your heart will be covered by the most beautiful scar, and the pain won't be as intense as it is right now. All this will come in time, your time, so please don't think you're 'nuts', you're not, it's the incredible pain that makes you feel that way, and we who are further along the Journey understand only too well how you and Lisa are feeling right now.
You want Solange back, and Lisa wants Aaron back! It's too hard right now for you to accept your sweet Solange's passing, and that's OK, in time you will be able to. Time is a good friend to you right now, you need plenty of it, so just let the tears come, let your pain out, talk to Solange, and no matter how you feel, talk to God. How we Moms who are further along the Journey would love to take your pain away, and Lisa's and Eva's, but we can't, we had to go through it ourselves, so we are a sign of hope for you, you will survive this pain that rips at your very being, it'll never completely go away, but it won't be 24/7 as it is right now, so hang onto that thought. And we are all here for you and always will be, when you can't walk, we carry you all, when you can't pray, we fill in the gap for you, and most of all, we give our love and support to you, you are never alone in your grief. Holy Spirit, the Great Comforter, I humbly ask for Your help for our dear sister Selva, who you know is in great pain today, comfort her as only You can, and may Our dear Lord wrap you in His loving arms and feel His great love for you, He weeps with you in your pain, and wants to hold you and rock you as the child of His that you are. May you also feel Solange around you today, feel her love for you, it's still there and always will be. Love you my dear Selva, and I'm lighting a Candle for you and Solange today while praying for you, that the pain will lessen a bit, and know that you are in loving Hands. Please write back and let us know how you're doing, we love you and care for you our dear one,
Lots of love & Prayers,

6/15/2003 18:43

hello all..I am posting today with strength that only comes from my Heavenly Father...Today is Father's Day....and I have a great smile on my face knowing that my Matthew is sharing it with the Father of Father's!!. That image of my Matthew at Jesus's bosom takes away some of my pain today.I will always miss him.and he will forever be in my heart...I thank all of you for lifting Ronnie and me up in your prayers. I will continue to press on..In my heart I have the will..but in my mind..I have no thoughts but ways to end my life..I am very afraid...I love you all.....Eva

6/16/2003 14:43

Dearest Eva, I'm so happy you posted, we worry when we don't hear from you, knowing the pain that you, Selva and Lisa are in right now. Yes, just imagine how happy Matthew is sharing it with Our Heavenly Father, and I'm so glad that you take great comfort from it, and it eases some of your pain! Of course sweetie you're always going to miss Matthew, and he's in your heart just as you and Ronnie are forever in his. Oh Eva, it pains me to hear you talk like that, please go and see your family Dr., a Counsellor or your Pastor, and tell them how you're feeling! Ending your life is NOT the answer, follow your heart instead dear one, and please get help! I'm asking Our Lord to put His Angels around you to drive away the spirit of fear and keep you protected. Please post back again, you know we all care and love you, and want you to press on! You just have to give yourself more time, and slowly the pain you're feeling won't be as harsh. God love you dear Eva, I wish I was there to comfort you, you've read here how so many of us went through that phase of wanting to die also, you'll get past it too, with God's help and great love for you, and you know our prayers are always with you and Ronnie, especially now, but please talk over your feelings with someone you trust, we love you and want to hear from you,
Much love & many prayers,

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