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Shane Whalen
This Prayer Circle is Dedicated to my son Shane Whalen Who Passed Away On March 15, 1999 at the Age of 24, & All Other Children

Start a prayer circle for bereaved parents who have lost a child.

There are many of us out there who have lost a child, and it is devastating. It changes the outlook on life, plunges you into a depression, and you think that the feelings and thoughts you have nobody else could possibly relate to. I think a prayer circle for bereaved parents would only benefit us and help us on our journey of grief. This Circle is one of Love, where a Grieving Parent can safely come to for Prayers, and to talk about their feelings.

Shaner -10/14/2000
send to a friend

Read Prayers.

12/29/2002 17:53

Hi dear Deb, that's cute, buying you a CD and two movies, you probably would have lent him the car anyway, so it was sweet of him to buy you those things. They never want to hear anything from their moms, :) He sounds like a wonderful young man, and you have every right to be proud of him! If he's spoiled, it's because you love him so much, I think we all spoil our children to some extent. Wow Deb, a new sewing machine, you must enjoy making things. Oh, that sounds so beautiful, a quilt made by you and your mother, it'll be a family keepsake, and will look beautiful in your new home. Gosh yes, you must be excited about the house and finally moving in! Enjoy the football game with your hubby, and have a wonderful Sunday dinner, turkey, yum!
Much love to you and Happy New Year too,
Luv Sandy

12/30/2002 02:12

Dear Tponce3396, ~ I just wanted to let you know that we all are praying for your friends, Greg and Julie, who lost their precious Kelsie on 12/20/02. God bless you for submitting a prayer request for them. We also include Carissa in our prayers. Losing a child is by far a mother's and father's worst nightmare. We moms here agree that because most men grieve differently than us moms, we sometime make the mistake of thinking their pain isn't as great as ours. The truth is, men/dads in general, have been conditioned to be strong for us women/moms. Their hearts are shattered just as ours, but most choose to grieve privately. We moms also agree that they have a right to grieve in there own way and cannot always be there for us in the way we feel we need them to be. I am mentioning this just to make sure that newly bereaved moms are aware of this.

Please know that we will keep this family in our heartfelt prayers daily. Thank you again for your post. Peace and blessings!

12/30/2002 02:34

Dear God, ~ As we approach the new year, we have so much to be thankful for. Lord, you know we are grieving the loss of our children ... And, that it is so very hard to be strong, especially during the holidays. And as we approach the new year, Father, our prayer is the same ... That you will continue to bless us with peaceful moments throughout the new year. Then, too, Lord, give those of us who have been on our journey a while longer, the strength, to be there for our newly bereaved moms, even as we ourselves are grieving. Thank you so much Lord, for being patient with us ... For allowing us to grieve in our own way and for as long as we feel the need. Thank you also, Lord, for understanding and forgiving us when our grief shows up in the form of anger. Thank you for understanding that it is the love bond that we will always have with our children that makes the weight of our crosses so heavy. When it gets too heavy, thank you for helping us to carry our cross of a lifetime! And, thank you Lord, for hearing and answering our heartfelt prayers! In Jesus' name ... Amen!

12/30/2002 02:38

But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount on wings like eagles. They shall run and not grow weary. They shall walk and not be faint.
Isaiah 40:31

12/30/2002 04:15

dear tponce3396,
i'm so sorry to hear of the loss of your daughter kelsi, please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. love debby

dear father i pray that you will help guide this family and give them strenght to get through this new journey the are exsperiencing right now. i pray that you will help give them courage and walk at there side and guide them along your path, i ask this in your name the father, amen.

12/30/2002 04:23

hi sandy,
the dinner was great and i did enjoy the game with my hubby. my hubby watches several diffent games. when one is over he watches another one. some times i just go in the kitchen and cook or bake. i have a tv in there to and he will make sure it's on for when he comes to see what i'm cooking. doesn't want to miss a play. ha ha.he is so funny at times.
my brother will be here today and i can't wait to see my new niece. my camera's are ready to go ha ha a. every one knows i do all the picture taken in the family.
i hope you have a great day. thoughts and prayers to you love debby

12/30/2002 04:34


Morning Prayer

Thank you, God, for early dawn,
That chases night away.
Thank you, God, for birds that sing,
And soft, sweet sounds of day.
Thank You, God, for work to do,
To keep busy all the while,
And for the unexpected things
That cheer and make smile.
Thank You, God, for loyal friends
Who never let you down;
Gratefully they've stuck by me
Thoughi've not been around.
Thank You, God, for returning health;
God is love, i know;
He cares for me and my guide,
And points the way to go.

12/30/2002 08:48

Hello dear Verna, thank you for the prayers that you post, they are always so helpful and inspirational! Love the quote from Isaiah. Much love and prayers to you,
Luv Sandy

12/30/2002 08:58

Hi dearest Deb, oh, I bet your dinner was good, turkey and the trimmings! Leftover's tonight? Oh gosh, your hubby and my Chris would make a good team, Chris is the same way, NOTHING comes between him and his football, :)
When he lived at home, he'd take his plate of food into his bedroom to make sure he didn't miss anything, ha, ha! Hey, that's terrific that your brother and family are coming today, you'll get to see your new niece, and have a nice visit. I bet your camera is going to be very busy today, take lots of good pics! I love your prayer of gratefulness to God, it's beautiful. Have a wonderful day, much love and prayers to you,
Luv Sandy

12/30/2002 09:40

Hi all you Angel moms. I'm back at work today, piles of papers on my desk, but that will keep my mind accupied for a while. Deb, your husband must be happy for after all the Dolphins lost at the last minute. My sister swore she will never watch then play again, there are no good etc etc etc.I'm starting to understand the game (now that it will be over soon). I will keep you all in my prayers, I always take little breaks to do so. Love you all Selva

12/30/2002 13:42

Hello dear Selva, back to work today, with plenty to do! I guess you have to get caught up, after the Holidays. But, as you say, it'll help keep your mind busy. I heard this morning that Miami lost, and though of you and your sister, that's cute, your sister getting angry with her team, :) there's always next year. Oh, that's so wonderful of you to take little breaks and pray for us, we all appreciate it, and our love and prayers are always with you. I pray you have a good day,
Luv Sandy

12/30/2002 20:18

Hello all angel moms.. just wanted to let eveyone know how Ron and I are doing. Ron and I went to my parents home for Christmas,It was very hard. All we wanted to do was sit at home and be alone. But we went,decided to go to my parents house ..then go to the cemetery last. I wanted to go to the cemetery first...but I knew in my heart if we would of done that first...I would of never been able to leave Matthew's grave to go to be with family that still have all their kids... I was so angry that day. We got to my parents house...Everyone was glad to see us.I never let anyone truly see what I was feeling...Ron had to get up during the "giftgiving" and step outside. My nephew past out the gifts. I had ordered my grandchild Preslie a little lamb that plays Jesus Loves Me (One of Matt's favorite songs)and everyone was quite when I asked her to open that gift first. I told her that her Poppy and I had got her that lamb in memory of her Uncle Matthew.... She opened it and just hugged it to herself.. My heart was breaking.. I cried.... My sister read that Poem ..the one about spending Christmas with Jesus this year.... Everyone stood for a moment of silence at that time. I'm not sorry I was there..Just sorry that I cannot share the "joy" everyone seems to beleivethat I should have right now that Matthew is with Jesus. Don't get me wrong... I am truly thankful Jesus came to earth and died for our sins and that comforts me knowing matthew is with him... but.....the only emotion I have right now is anger. A new year coming..... I'm lost....don't know how not to bring this anger with me to this new year God help me I don't want to..ron and I we're going to go to bed early that night.being matt and his dad always had bottlerocket wars....I don't know......then tonight I find out that my transfer I applied for was turned down because of cut backs the state is doing... I work at a prison.we have an execution coming up on the 8th of jan.and on his birthday!some at work are so tired of working at a job so close to death...this transfer I wanted so badly fell I am at a lose to what to do...I love you all.....desperate& so tired in Mississippi/Eva

12/31/2002 08:33

Hello dear Eva, it's so nice to see you posting again. It certainly sounds like you have a very tough time at Christmas, having to put a 'mask' on for everybody else while inside you're in a lot of pain, and even family sometimes just doesn't understand. It must have been so hard on your hubby, having to get up during the gift giving and leave the room, God love him. That's a beautiful gift to give to your Preslie, something from Uncle Matt, and his favourite song, "Jesus Loves Me", but it must have been such a bittsweet moment for you, when Preslie opened it. And when you sister read the poem, it must have really touched everyone there.
I know, I think we've all experienced it here, that we should be thankful that our child is in Heaven, and like you, we are, but that doesn't stop us missing them or feeling painful emotions. They're not physically in our lives anymore, and it hurts, the missing, the longing for them, it is painful. Feeling angry is normal in the grieving process, and God understands that. We go through a phase where we're angry with everybody and everything, but it does pass, so hold on, pray, and soon you'll be out of it. We remember Holidays past, and all our family traditions, and now our lives are changed, and some of those traditions become painful memories. I can tell from your post that you're in a lot of pain, God love you, and we'll pray for some peace to come to your heart. That's unfortunate that you didn't get the transfer, it must be difficult to work there, under those circumstances, especially after losing Matt. Please go back and see your Dr., some of us need some help to try and deal with our loss, there's no shame in it, perhaps a little help right now is what you need. You've experienced a painful Christmas, and a setback at your job, that's a lot to deal with, on top of your grief, I'm happy for you that your hubby is so supportive of you. The grieving process is slow, everybody grieves at their own pace, and that's OK, it's all part of the process, and it's very good to talk about your pain, you have to let it out. I'm so happy you posted here about your feelings, we all know and understand how you're feeling, and you know you have our love and support, you post here anytime, it's good to let it out as I said, and we'll always be here for you, Eva, you're in our love and prayers. Much love to you,
Luv Sandy

12/31/2002 10:58

Hi Eva. I am also very sorry the you are in Valley days, and that you are so angry, I understand because I get up in an angry mood almost everyday, I lost Solange 4 months ago, so my pain is very raw right now, but follow Sandy's advice, she and the other moms from this circle had helped me tremendously, and you should go to your Dr, I'm going to my phsycologist once a week, but I am in this Circle of Love every day that helps me more than anything. Today is a very sad day for us, and we have to keep preying hard for one another. I'm in the valley, I'm working today and that helps a litte, but I'm planning to go to bed very early and do my crying and praying for the New year, I have nothing to look forward to, so it will be like any other day. I will keep you in my prayers just I as do for all my Angel moms in this Circle of Love.Selva

12/31/2002 13:47

Hello Wonderful Moms
It's New Year's Eve, a brand new year starting tomorrow. How quickly I find that time passes now, it's hard for me to believe that tomorrow will be 2003. We don't know what lays ahead for us in the upcoming year, but if we put our trust in God, He'll show us the way. The start of a new year tomorrow reminds us of our child/children not being with us, and it will be a very painful time for some, and a bittersweet and reflective time for others, depending where we are on our own Journey of Grief.
I would like to thank all of you who have posted this year, you have inspired me, lifted me up, and truly made this Circle a Circle of Love. I am truly blessed to know all of you and I love you all and always keep you in my prayers. I wish all of you a peaceful, blessed, comforting start to the New Year, and know that you're always in my heart. Much love to all of you,
Luv Sandy

12/31/2002 16:29

Hi Sandy and all you Angel moms. I just got out of work a little while ago, passed by my house and the world ended, I saw all Solange's clothes, imagined what che will be wearing tonight to celebrate New Years etc. and got angry again, this anger mixed with this awful pain its so hard to take. I'm back at my sister, and the poor thing has to put up with all this pain, of course she is going through her pain loosing Solange, but you know it is different. To be hones I'm planning to take a drink of scotch and cry, pray and go to sleep.I hope God listens. like the book says"If God is so Good why do I hurt so bad? Have a blessed New Year all you Angel moms. Love you Selva

12/31/2002 18:22

Hello dearest Selva, oh sweetie, that must have been so painful for you, 'seeing' Solange and remembering many New Year's Eves past, her getting all dressed up for the evening. Little things like driving by your house and knowing it's New Year's Eve, can trigger many painful memories, and this year especially for you, because it's your first. I remember my Shane getting all dressed up for New Year's Eve too, happy and anxious to ring in the New Year with his girlfriend and friends. So many memories. You be as angry as you want to be, God DOES understand, it's a very painful time for you. I'm so happy to read that you're going over to your sister's, I'm sure she doesn't mind, she sounds so supportive and loving to you, and you have your drink of Scotch and cry. God will listen to you! You hurt so bad because of your great love of your daughter, who was called home early by God. That's why we hurt, our children mean the world to us, they are a piece of our heart, and when they went, a piece of us went with them too. We're mothers, and we've spent our lifetime worrying about our children, keeping them safe and loved, but we couldn't protect them from passing on, so we hurt, and we hurt badly, to our very core, our heart and soul. Our lives have been forever changed, and it's painful, so just take it one day at a time Selva, all of us have been in that awful place you're in right now, and we know how raw the pain can be. We're always here for you, pour out your feelings, we all understand and love you and pray for you. You have a blessed New Year too dear Selva, and our prayers and love are with you,
Luv Sandy

12/31/2002 18:44

Thank you Sandy for always been there. I'm in such a pain tonight that only you and all the Angel moms in this Citcle of Love understand. I thank the LOrd for my sister and brother and for all you Angel Moms. I'm in a very deep valley day tonight. I thank God for my sister put up with me. and thank the Lord for guiding me to this Circle of Love. May God Bless You All. Love you Selva

12/31/2002 21:06

I told you Selva, we care, and my heart breaks knowing what pain you're in, all the moms here know of that terrible pain. We'll always be here for you, with our love, support, understanding and prayers. I'm so happy for you that you have such a loving, supportive family, you need them right now, and you have your 'other family' here, at this Circle of Love. My love and my prayers are with you always, together we'll help you through,
Luv Sandy

12/31/2002 22:39

Hello Selva, Eva, and all the rest of our extended family. My heart goes out to all bereaved moms, but especially our newly bereaved moms. As Sandy said in the post above, I, too, have been where you newly bereaved moms are now. Therefore, I can also relate to the indescribable grief and pain of facing yet another holiday without your precious child. I know there is nothing anyone can say to stop that pain. Lord knows, if I had it in my power I would take all of our grief and pain away. I cannot, so I will do what I can... I can always pray for all of us. And please know that I and the other moms who are a little farther along on their grief journey appreciate very much the prayers that our newly bereaved moms send up for us. Together, in prayer, we will get through the night as best we can, knowing that our children are right here with us in spirit. I was feeling a little down in the valley earlier this evening, so I just decided that I would do something special that I hope will help everyone focus on something other than our grief and pain. I decided I would share one of my fond memories that I shared with my precious daughter, Diane, in days gone by. It's just one of several fond memories that I share in my upcoming book. :) For those of you who will be up to help bring the new year in, I invite you to take a peek at the fond memory that I left at Diane's memorial site earlier this evening. [I decided to post there so that no one would feel forced to read it] :) Only if you choose to do so as a means of passing time on this lonnggggg night. :) I truly hope that it will help each Mom recall some fond memory of their child, and perhaps share with the other moms ... If not tonight, then maybe sometime during the new year. :) I thank God for each and every Mom who have joined us and become such an important part of our Circle of Love. I feel so blessed to have been a part of such a caring extended family. I wish you all many more peaceful moments -- throughout this night, as well as throughout the new year. May God bless bereaved parents everywhere! I'll be here especially for the newly bereaved most of the night, God willing. Again, God bless everyone, and as always, all are in my heartfelt prayers!
Much Love to All,
PS ~ Sandy, thanks again for the lovely New Year greeting. I tried to fwd it to everyone on my email list. :) Simply beautiful! I also sent it back to you! :)
Much love,

1/1/2003 10:04

Hello dear Verna, you're welcome for the New Year's greeting, and I'd also like to thank all the other wonderful Moms who sent greetings to me, you are all so special! May God bless all of you, and my love and prayers are with you all! Thanks Verna for the first e-mail Hug of 2003, it was very cute! Love and Prayers,
Luv Sandy

1/1/2003 11:37

Hi Verna, Sandy and all you Angel moms.Thanks Verna for the cute card it brough the first smile in New Years. Thank you for your prayers and care. I went to sleep early last night, I prayed for all of us and our children, but just like 5 minutes before midnight I woke up, you know I think it was Solange who did it, at least I though so, she knows that I like to watch Times Square ( I lived in New York for many years ) so I turned the TV on and there it was Times Square, I thank God and I felt good thinking that Solange was here with me Waiting for the New Year, sometimes when she went out she always managed to call me at 12 to wish me a Happy New Year, so I think last night she called me.Today I will be just here all day, my sister went out to see her sister in law and fave breakfast with them but she will be back soon and keep me company, my brother just called, he worked all night and he was going to bed now. I will be visiting Dianes' memorial, that is such a good idea, I will try to concentrate today just to the beautiful memories. Thank you for your prayers and know you are in mine. I prayed to God that instead of taking care of me and my grief to dedicate that time to Solange, to make sure she is happy and well and very close to HIM. I love you all. Selva

1/1/2003 11:42

Thank you Verna for visiting Solange's memorial, that was so sweet of you as always, I really appreciate it. Than you for all your prayers and your love, again I thank God for bringing me to this Circle of Love. Love. Selva

1/1/2003 13:11

Hello dear Selva, I'm so very happy for you that you had a good New Year's Eve, and I do believe that Solange was with you, helping you through the painful time you were having last night! When I read your posts last night, and knew how much pain you were in, I prayed to Our Lord for Solange to come to you and that you would feel her presence. So I was filled with joy when I read your post about feeling her there with you, I'm not saying it was just my prayer for you, God is so good to us grieving moms! Yes, I believe she called you! We watched the ball drop on Times Square last night, and then went to bed, we aren't used to staying up that late, but we wanted to see the New Year in. It will be a quiet day for us, but all our family will be calling us wishing us a Happy New Year. I'm happy that you won't be alone today, your sister is such a comfort to you, God bless her, you're so fortunate to have her and your brother to lean on. Yes, try and concentrate on your good memories of Solange, the love that you and she have for each other, and always will, and the many, many good times you both shared together. Offering up your prayers for Solange is wonderful, I know she's in Our Lord's arms, and helping her beloved mom here on earth. I pray that you feel her around you again, helping you with your pain, she's your very own Angel now. Be blessed Selva, and know that you are loved, our love and prayers are with you always, I'm so happy that God led you to this Circle of Love too, much love to you,
Luv Sandy

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