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AA TJ A
I have decided to end my life


Please pray for my soul and for my family. I know this seem selfish, but if you knew me you would know it is not.

I have decided that I can no longer stand the pain of my life. I can't seem to get things right no matter how I try. I have spent a lifetime putting others ahead of myself and now I am too tired to go on. Please pray that my children will make it through this and be safe and loved. Pray for the man that has left me here that he doesn't feel guilt. Also the same for my family. As for me please pray that God has mercy on me.
 
Ttotired2care -5/11/2003
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BeliefnetGrace
5/14/2003 15:41

We're sorry you feel so badly right now. We wish we had more help to offer here, but it sounds as if you would benefit from talking to a caring person who is trained to help. We have three resources you could try. We hope you will contact one of them as soon as possible. You deserve to get help, and to get it sooner rather than later.

1. If you are in the U.S., call 1-800-SUICIDE any time, day or night. When you call this free number, you will be connected immediately to a caring, trained counselor in your region. The sooner you make this call, the better.

2. If you can hold on for a few days, free anonymous crisis counseling is available by e-mail from an international charity called Befrienders International (known in this country as The Samaritans). Send an e-mail to Jo@samaritans.org and you will receive a caring response within 24 hours.

3. There is a website you may find helpful, called Suicide: Read This First.

You are in our prayers.

The Beliefnet Community Staff


coconutcat
5/14/2003 17:41

Oh my God! I pray that I have reached you in time. You are not alone in
your! pain. Please contact me immediately. I want to help you and give you
love that you are not feeling b/c depression has dulled your senses. My
email is ebarton2@nyc.rr.com. You need someone to
listen that can help you. I am throwing you a line and I pray to God that
you grab it. My deepest love and prayers go out to you. God does not want
you to end your life. If he wanted that he would take you himself. Think
about your children. They need you. Trust me noone will love them and take
care of them the way you can. I am speaking from experience! This pain is
only temporary. I promise. Call me and I will help you. Elizabeth


coconutcat
5/14/2003 17:43

Oh my God! I pray that I have reached you in time. You are not alone in
your! pain. Please contact me immediately. I want to help you and give you
love that you are not feeling b/c depression has dulled your senses. My
email is ebarton2@nyc.rr.com. You need someone to
listen that can help you. I am throwing you a line and I pray to God that
you grab it. My deepest love and prayers go out to you. God does not want
you to end your life. If he wanted that he would take you himself. Think
about your children. They need you. Trust me noone will love them and take
care of them the way you can. I am speaking from experience! This pain is
only temporary. I promise. Contact me and I will help you. Elizabeth


monphia
5/18/2003 12:23

I hope that this message gets to you in time. I know what you are going through. I once also considered ending my life. I thought I was alone and that no one loved me. You are not alone. You are loved. Someone that you don't even know loves you. I love you. You are my brother. I cry for you and for your pain. I am with you eventhough I do not know you. Please believe in yourself and that you are special because everyone is. I have made many mistakes myself but somehow God has guided me and has helped me to make it through. Please if you need someone to talk to write to me. I am here for you, I promise. I LOVE YOU!!!!


LoverlySmile
5/21/2003 02:06

You have touched me. Please let God soothe your pain. A great writer once wrote that it is important to remember that when sorrow sits with you at your table, joy is asleep upon your bed. Remember, it is His Will we strive for, not our own. And His gifts far surpass what we would order for ourselves. God Bless you my dear. You have touched my heart and brought tears to my eyes. You are not alone even though it seems that way at this moment.


LoverlySmile
5/21/2003 02:08

You have touched me. Please let God soothe your pain. A great writer once wrote that it is important to remember that when sorrow sits with you at your table, joy is asleep upon your bed. Remember, it is His Will we strive for, not our own. And His gifts far surpass what we would order for ourselves. God Bless you my dear. You have touched my heart and brought tears to my eyes. You are not alone even though it seems that way at this moment.


eldercrow
7/2/2003 08:33

Please take our open hands in yours, you are among others who care. Love & help is close to you, please reach out to it. We are praying for you in this moment. Love will heal your suffering.


RebeksHalo
7/8/2003 22:19

I have been there. You could tell God exactly how you feel. Tell Him you are not going to take it anymore, That it is up to Him. Give it all to Him. He is BIG enough to take it and handle it. I used to think I wasn't supposed to burden God with anything personal. I was pointed to the book of Psalms and told how David got angry with God, threw tantrums, asked for fire and boulders to rain down on his enemies. God took it. David cried and felt sorry for himself and had major pity parties for himself and God took it. David did not lie or hide how he really felt about anything from God. He went straight to God with it, no matter how big or small and physically displayed his feelings--all alone--in the desert--to God. All the praise, all the songs, all the anger, hurt, confusion, and lonlyness given to God. God wants to hear and HEAL your heart--Just as He attended to David's. I believe in You.

I myself have had huge tantrums and pity parties where I have beaten my couch cushsions and pillows to a pulp while screaming to God about my situations. He IS BIG ENOUGH. My heart goes out to you and FOR you. Please read Jeremiah 29:11 and hang onto His promise for you.


Niilantei
11/24/2003 04:58

I don't know whether I am late or not. PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE, I am on my knees. DON'T DO THAT. Think about your kids too. I know God will never leave you. Like many other things that happened to you, THIS TOO< SHALL PASS. Please get in touch if you need to talk: nii_lantei@hotmail.com


jewliaM
12/7/2003 14:03

Please dearest Child of Christ, let Christ sooth You, Fall into his arms. He loves you and He gave HIS life in service to YOU, putting YOU first, so do not dispare, for if YOU have lived with the pain of others, YOU are like CHRIST. I have prayed for you and I know I am much later reading and praying than YOU posted this message, but I know my prayers will span the gap of time, and God's will will be done! GOD loves you so much! He was on the cross knowing what YOU would be thinking. I pray for you and your family. I pray that an angel would be sent then to hold your hand and show you the beauty of your life.


brbara
12/26/2003 13:06

I pray in the name of Jesus Christ that He will heal your heart ache. Let go and let Godm take away your suffering and pain. He is your Rock.Remember God died on the cross so you may live and have everlasting life in Him our Father.
Please trust God...in our prayers always.


Allison817
1/22/2004 13:51

I pray that it is not to late to send this. I, too, have been in your situation, and I know what you're feeling, believe me I do. I cry writing this, because I know, I've been there. I understand the desperation.. But take a look at your children's faces and the people who love you and try to rise above what you're feeling and imagine what a life of heartache would be left behind by your loss. It was once said that you may be one person to the world, but you may BE the world to one person. I pray that you will find the strength to endure and feel the love of those praying for you. I care what you are feeling and I understand. Please email me and let me know you are ok. amasakowski@luzerne.edu


mercy_be
1/26/2004 10:00

I hope that my prayer reaches you in time. I understand how you must feel, i've gone through several horrible experiences in my life and felt desperate to find an easy way out of it. But suicide is not the answer for escaping your problems. There are so many options available to you to give you the strenght to face the hard-ships. If you are critical of clinical options such as theraphy, then the only suggestion that remains and the one that is the best is to dearly pray to God, the God that your heart and soul know and love for courage, strenght, peace and a way out of the troubles that plague you. Your prayers may not be answered automatically, but God always answers a prayer for help in all sincerity. Please put your faith in God and look towards a positivity. And while you are going through pretty emotionally turbulent times because of the stress that has been placed on you, it would be prudent to ask those who are taking up your time without any consideration for your well-being to give you some free time for yourself to heal and emerge a lot more hopeful in future. Also place your trust in your abilities, you are not worthless and helpless, you have the power to help yourself and help others and to put things right. It's your choice to make. Most things are choices...we either choose to go on despite difficulties to arrive at a better place in our lives, or to remain in limbo or to give up altogether. These may not be easy to achieve in one day but it's another process that requires patience, perseverance and determination, just like life is a process with trials and tribulations. Please refer to some sites that can help you with the way you're feeling or confide in someone that you trust so that they may be able to help you and good family members and friends are always willing to help. Please don't give up on your life and your childrens lives. They shouldn't have to go through their lives without a special person such as their mother sharing it with them. Peace and blessings. Please God, help her.


connie444
10/10/2004 18:40

please dont do this God loves you I have survived incest broken home divorces and so much more but I know God loves me please just pray and keep praying. I once thought about killing myself but God showed me his love and the prayer circle is showing love today and every day so please don't do it. The world is hard enough but for your family to not have you it will really be hard. We are here to serve each other so when people seem that they don't appreicate you so be it God knows you are doing his work and the ultimate goal is to do his will not yours and God did not give you permiision to take your life when he is the one who gave it to you, don't lose your soul by doing this I understand your pain I really do but and there is a but just wait and see you will get strenght as time goes by. WAIT ON THE LORD AND DON'T LEAN ON YOUR OWN UNDERSTANDING I LOVE YOU AS CHRIST LOVES YOU.


connie444
10/10/2004 18:42

HERE IS MY E-MAIL cbm_brown@yahoo.com


lisagirl8
12/6/2004 20:00

god protect you, strengthen you, soothe you. i send you my deepest strongest love, i pray that you are still here in this life. i pray that you see all this outpouring if love and know you are not alone.


taniyachina25
2/7/2005 10:12

Come lay down the burden's you have carried for in the sanctuary god is here, your life is not your own to take of course you have the ability physicially to do it but god does want it that way, it is the trick of the enemy for you to take your life, he knows that there is something great in store for you, I too have suffered with depression very badly, my mother tried to kill herself and was placed in a mental ward, my brother has HIV, and I have been sexual molested but, God has saved me and although I still remember the things that have happened to me and the things that I have gone through there is nothing that god can't get me through, hang on trust me your children need you, nothing is to hard for god, in him we are made whole and in him is strength, it doesn't matter how far down you are, I pray this reponse is not late, I pray that your Faith Rise up, your joy rise up, your peace rise up, your hope rise up. I love you with the love of Christ, for this to will pass.


jennife1
5/1/2005 15:07

Please don't do this. This year I have experienced severe clinical depression and I thought that I would commit suicide. I felt that I had nothing to live for. You only live once, life is a gift, don't lose your faith in Heavenly Father. Please don't do this. If you have children you already have something wonderful to live for. Please reconsider, if I could survive so can you, I was so depressed I was losing my mind, I was on another planet, please I love you. Lord, please help this woman to change her mind, please help her like you have helped me all of these times. Lord please bless all of those who are in pain so that they may experience extreme joy in their lives. Lord please continue to touch all of those with your wonderful blessings and heal all of us with your love. Please Lord, life gets so difficult sometimes and we need your love from above. I ask you in the name of your beloved son, Jesus Christ AMEN.


jennife1
5/1/2005 15:09

here is my e-mail, jenniferportnoy2@hotmail.com


Cyprian
5/30/2005 16:48

Lord have mercy on thy servants.


indignant
7/28/2005 01:45

I hope that you are still here to read this. Your words were very powerful. I have also put others first and sometimes feel too tired to go on myself. Please ask God to help you through this and please reach out for the help that you need. I do feel your pain. You are not alone. I wish you many blessings and a sense of peace.


terryrn2
8/10/2005 10:57

Hello, I know you posted this 2 years ago, but I have a feeling that you are still alive-I hope! But if you were in that much pain, perhaps you still may be. If you are still hurting, I just want to say that I do understand. I have been there and am now. I do feel for you. I am actually crying as I write this because I am in pain myself and feel for yours as well. I really do hope you are ok now. Please post to let us know that you are!!! If you need to chat with someone my email is terryrn2@aol.com
I pray for you and your family, especially your children.
Terry :/


sappie1952
8/16/2005 23:41

this is for you, totiredtocare. I hope and pray my feelings are correct and you are still with us in God's beautiful world. It is when we feel our life is falling apart when actually for the first time, it is just starting to fall together. I know it isn't easy and I can say this because I've been there and tried to end my life but, didn't suceed. You know why? because God even then was telling me "I'M IN CONTROLL OF THIS" and trust me he is. I'm still going through things but, the difference is, I've changed the way I perceive things therefore I handle them differently. Please if you can purchase "Conversations with God" volumes 1,2 and 3 by Neale Walsch, gauranteed to help you see life in a different light. Please e-mail me at sappie1952@yahoo.com and tell me you are alive and well.....Please!!I love you!!!! My name is Shirley Parker


K30MARIE43
12/29/2005 05:00

I HOPE YOU ARE STILL WITH US. I KNOW EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL. I'VE FOUGHT THOSE THOUGHTS FOR A LONG TIME AND EVEN TRIED TO END MY LIFE BUT GOD SAID IT WASN'T MY TIME TO GO. PLEASE LET ME KNOW. I WOULD REALLY LOVE TO TALK TO YOU. MY E-MAIL IS wesandbensgranny@yahoo.com.
GOD BLESS YOU,
EVA GROSS

 
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