The English offer each other "tea and sympathy." What we do here in the states could be better described as "coffee and apathy."

An old friend heard about the break-up of my marriage and immediately went over her checklist of ‘What He Must Have Done.’

"Did he beat you? That scoundrel. Was it drugs? Oh, I know! He was cheating. Wives are always the last to know."

What is it about our troubles that make us want to share them with our friends? Does the act of opening up make us feel better, or simply remind us of how bad we feel?

I don't have the answer as to why God allows us to hurt in such extreme ways, but I do know that most of the pain is caused by other people, not by God.

The Creator of All Things wouldn't equip us with a heart that beats like a metronome, stereophonic ears, and even decorative touches like eyebrows, only to put us through a gauntlet of pain and pathos.

Do what you can to move forward so you're not stuck in the quicksand of the past, and life will get better over time.

Ruth Williams is a founding member of the Prayables PrayMaker Council and freelance writer living in central Jersey, with her son, Coleman. You can read more from Ruth on and on her blog; .

Just this Day

Help me stay in the present tense today.
Keep the past where it belongs.
Even the future can be a stumbling block
if it slows me down now.

There's only so much room in my life
for what I need to carry.
If the world is an oyster
and inside it is a pearl,
open it for me.

Polish this day,
shine it up so I see it for the gift it is.
Allow me to be okay, right where I am,
even as I strive to be better.

Just once, filter out the static of what was
so I can be in this moment.



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