You left and no one gets why you’re feeling empty and isolated. Everyone assumes that your choice to leave was a selfish one, that only included your feelings, yet the truth is that you had no other choice but to leave. You whole heartedly believe the decision to leave is best for all parties involved within the divorce. Unfortunately, only those individuals who’ve experienced divorce can truly understand the magnitude of sorrow that is felt. In reality, no one really wants to leave however the hostility whether it is physical or emotional can be detrimental to all people within a household experiencing a divorce.
The emotional distress that each person feels during a divorce is difficult and can ultimately cause emotional anxiety and depression. It’s important to maintain your emotional health because splitting up is never easy and can forge a rift between many elements within your life. Divorce affects friendships, extracurricular clubs, church life, and even family celebrations. Not only do you feel an immense amount of guilt for leaving the house but those aspects in life affected by the separation also influence your mind frame. Onlookers don’t get it; they think that somehow you escaped all of the feelings and emotions wrapped up in your relationship because you left. However, the truth is you’re probably feeling more loneliness and isolation because you’re by yourself. Unfortunately, the comfort of someone else and the familiarity of your surroundings are not with you and that in itself is challenging.
So you’re probably asking yourself, “What do I do?” and “Where do I go from here?” Well unfortunately, there is no real answer. In fact, the only thing that will heal your wounds is time. Time truly does tell all. Therefore, you must not let others dictate your emotions. Chalk the emotions up of others, that caste judgment upon your departure, as they don’t understand and are not able to truly comprehend what you’re going through. Allow yourself to grieve because the loss of a marriage is something that changes individuals and guides them on to the next chapter of their life.
Surround yourself with people that reinforce positivity and can provide you with a valuable support system. Don’t listen to the naysayers that question your emptiness and believe your pain is not warranted. Instead use this time to dismiss people from your life that don’t understand and believe you to be selfish. Be at peace with your departure and accept your decision internally.
No one know the situation better than yourself therefore, if you can peacefully say that it was the best decision for you and your family then it was. Make attempts to communicate with your spouse or significant other. Do you best to make sure they understand why you left and are on the same page that you are. Your decision to leave should be conveyed to your children and spouse – if both of those groups understand then that’s all that truly matters. If you’re struggling for peace internally, then reach out to God and communicate your setbacks – he’ll point you into the right direction.