Over the years of helping people reach for their dreams, I’ve come across so many that are stuck all because of rejection from their past or even the fear of rejection that they might encounter when trying to reach for the life they have imagined. I’ve even had to battle with this ugly monster a time or two in my own life.
Let’s face it, rejection is part of the process and the sooner we realize that, then the sooner we can establish the mental fortitude and stamina to push through those moments and keep moving forward.
Years ago, I had a friend that worked at a mall kiosk. These are the workers in the mall that you shamelessly try to avoid while walking past them. You desperately try to avoid any type of eye contact or body language that would possibly suggest that you are interested in what they are offering. You walk by them praying that they don’t ask you if you have a second or if you would like to try their product.
Basically, these workers tend to face an incredible amount of rejection throughout their workday. One day I asked my friend how he dealt with the constant rejection of many people turning him down when he tried to extend an invitation to demonstrate or showcase the product. He laughed and said, “at first it was hard and intimidating but then I had to change a few mindsets and everything was OK.”
Your mindset can make a huge difference in the way you perceive rejection. You can see it as a roadblock or you can see it as a reroute or detour to something far greater than what you had ever imagined or hoped for.
Let’s take a look at these five keys to conquering rejection:
Always Expect The Best: If you’ve ever been rejected in your past then it’s real easy to establish a mindset by default that rejection is always going to happen. I’ve seen people stay stuck in life all because they’ve convinced themselves that their dream is not worth trying for again because it’s only going to end in rejection or disappointment just like last time.
“Most people never achieve anything because they simply don’t expect to.”
Here’s the truth of the matter. If you are always expecting rejection, or things to not work out like you planned it, then everything you do will be filtered through that mindset and perception. You won’t try as hard. You will never give a hundred percent effort in the endeavor because your mind is telling you already that it’s going to fail.
This is when you have to start thinking differently. You must begin to change your mindset and begin to hope for and expect the best.
Instead of expecting failure, start expecting success.
Instead of expecting everything to go wrong, start expecting everything to go right.
Instead of expecting a road block, start expecting a breakthrough.
When you expect the best it eliminates thoughts of failure and rejection in your mind. It also empowers you with faith and fortitude to keep moving forward.
Understand that Not Every Door is Supposed to Open: Your initial reaction to a closed door of opportunity can either propel you into your future, or enslave you in your present. If you stand there trying to figure out the “Why”, you will never see your “Next”.
When a door closes, quit standing there looking at it. You’re in a good position to turn around and start looking for the next opportunity that is coming your way. Keep your head up and your emotions in check. Quit trying to figure out all the reasons of why it didn’t happen. You are right where you are supposed to be. A closed door can lead to a great opportunity. Keep moving. Keep dreaming. Keep reaching. Whatever you do, don’t stop.
The answer to your “why” will come. I’m not exactly sure when, but I can guess that it will probably come around the time you walk through the next open door of opportunity that blows your mind. Then you will be able to see why the other door closed in the first place. It had to close. It needed to close. It was supposed to close, so you could enjoy the rewards of the next opportunity.
So the next time you encounter a closed door, quickly move on and expect that something good is in store for you.
Forgive and Let Go: “Unforgiveness is like holding a hot coal in your hand and being mad at the person who started the fire. Forgive, drop it, and let it go.”
We have all felt wronged, betrayed or taken advantage of at least one time or another in our life. We have memories of a painful experience or event with another person that still bothers us today. Whether you've been hurt by a family member, friend, co-worker or a spouse, it's time to forgive and let it go.