The Secret Behind Why We Love Those 'Game of Thrones' Characters so Much

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If you’re a fan of George R. R. Martin’s “A Song of Ice and Fire” series, or its hit HBO adaptation, Game of Thrones, you’re probably familiar with the feeling of throwing your book or remote control at the wall while weeping uncontrollably.

Death is a fact of life in the fictional realm of Westeros. No character, from the ones we love to hate to the ones we simply adore, is safe from the reaper’s sickle. In fact, it seems as if the more we love a character, the more likely they are to face a horrific end.

All it takes is a quick visit to YouTube to see audience reactions to these deaths, complete with tears, screams of rage and agony, and even a few minor breakdowns. But this causes some to wonder: why do audiences all over the world become so deeply attached to Game of Thrones characters, despite the fact that we could lose them at any moment? What foul magic are George R. R. Martin and the writers at HBO working on us?

The answer lies in one powerful word: empathy. Martin is a master of manipulating his audience into empathizing more with certain characters by putting those characters at a permanent disadvantage.

This disadvantage could be anything from a crippling injury, to lowly social status or a strong moral code. This is an incredibly powerful technique, and keeps us glued to the page and screen, rooting for these characters to overcome the odds and triumph.

This is the secret behind why we love those Game of Thrones characters so much. Now, let’s look at how this plays out in the lives of a few of our favorite characters.

Ned Stark

HBO

Beginning this list, Ned Stark is one of the most fascinating and compelling examples of empathy-building in Game of Thrones. Despite the fact that he’s been gone since the conclusion of season one, his name painfully lingers in the minds of fans everywhere, and his life continues to resonate throughout the story.

But what did George R. R. Martin do to make us emphasize with this man so much? In a word, he handicapped him.

This handicap wasn’t in the form of a physical disability, as we see in Bran Stark, or a mental disability, as is the case with Hodor. No—this is something wholly different.

In a world in which the strong prey upon the weak, Ned Stark’s handicap was his merciful heart.

Mercy marks Ned’s life. A good and honorable man, he stuck continually adhered to a strong sense of personal ethics, sparing the weak and meting out only as much justice as transgressors deserved—no more.

This put Ned at a serious disadvantage amongst those who valued power over mercy—virtually every other character in the story. We see this realization in a conversation between Varys and Ned about why Ned chose to warn Cercei that he knew about the illegitimacy of her children.

“What madness led you to tell the queen you learned the truth about Joffrey’s birth?” asked Varys.

“The madness of mercy,” replied Ned. “She might save her children.”

In the end, it was this “madness of mercy” that kept Ned from being able to make the ruthless choices which might have saved him. And in the end, that makes him one of the most compelling characters of all—one we wanted to win.

Daenerys Targaryen

HBO

Daenerys Targaryen is one of the most enduringly popular characters in Game of Thrones, and for good reason. We empathize with her. We root for her. We cheer, even when her dragons burn up huge swaths of human life.

Why? Because she has not one, but several major—and permanent—disadvantages in the world of Westeros.

The most important of these, in this historical setting, is Daenerys’ gender. The women of Westeros, with a few notable exceptions, are forced to take a backseat to the leadership of men. Often, they have precious little control over their own destinies, much less the fate of an entire realm.

In season one of the show, we’re introduced to Daenerys as she suffers abuse from her own brother, Viserys, and is given away to Khal Drogo in exchange for ten thousand Dothraki warriors mean to aid Viserys in his campaign to retake the Iron Throne.

But through a combination of grit, cunning, and strength, she perseveres , going on to become the mother of dragons we know today—the one who just may reunite the fractured realm and bring about a new age of peace, despite the societal limitations that come with being a woman in Westeros.

That is, if she can keep her darker side in check.

But whatever choices she makes, audiences will remember her roots, and keep on cheering for this survivor.

Tyrion Lannister

HBO

There’s a lot to like about Tyrion. He’s not just smart, but witty, and always has a sharp verbal jab in store for anyone who annoys him—no matter how powerful they may be. He’s fearless, but in an intelligent way that usually helps him to avoid serious harm.

But that’s not why we care so much about Tyrion Lannister. We care about this man because of what he has to work to overcome each and every day.

Tyrion is a “dwarf" in a world where most men are measured by the reach and strength of their sword arm.

Few characters in all of fiction give us such insight into what it means to be physically disabled. Often called an “imp,” and a “half-man,” Tyrion invoke audience empathy by his very stature. As an important member of House Lannister, Tyrion is treated with respect, but only on the surface. Even his father, Tywin, privately remarks on the shame he feels for fathering a “monster” of a son.

But this experience hasn’t made Tyrion bitter, and he isn’t portrayed in the negative light that is unfortunately common in disabled characters. He’s hilarious, hard-partying, and displays respect for others based on their own merits, rather than that of their social status.

He has, as he says, “a tender spot in my heart for cripples and bastards and broken things.” He is disabled, but not defined by his disability, not embittered by it, and most importantly of all, not limited by it in the ways that count.

The realistic treatment of Tyrion’s disability makes us want to root for him as he adventures throughout Westeros and beyond, using his sharp mind to get himself, and his friends, out of trouble.

Bran Stark

HBO

Bran Stark’s empathetic link to the audience was established from the very first episode of Game of Thrones, when he, a 10-year-old, was pushed from a tower window by Jaime Lannister. The fall didn’t kill young Bran, but it did permanently rob him of the use of his legs.

This is a source of immense grief for Bran—a child who once loved nothing more than to climb as high as possible. In realistic fashion, he never truly gets over the loss, but has to learn to adapt and cope over time.

Fortunately, he doesn’t allow his disability to remain an insurmountable obstacle. Rather than being portrayed as an object of pity, Game of Thrones chronicles Bran’s struggle to once again live his life, complete with setbacks and emotional turmoil.

This struggle in the face of a devastating physical injury connects the audience to Bran in a deep way, and when he finally comes into his own power as the Three-Eyed Raven, a boundless being with the ability to travel to any place or time, we cheer.

Jaime Lannister

HBO

Moments ago, you read that Jaime Lannister was the man who pushed a 10-year-old boy from a window, crippling him for life. He did this to cover up an incestuous relationship with his own sister.

He was the man we loved to hate.

That was season one. Now, in recent seasons, Jaime is a fan-favorite. What happened?

Empathy happened.

Jaime had one skill above all others, and that skill was killing. With his deft sword-hand, he could defeat any man or woman in Westeros in combat, and his prowess at dealing death was feared by all.

For first few seasons of Game of Thrones, Jaime is an unlikable killing machine. But then something happened that changed it all.

His sword-hand was cut off.

This was the hand that had committed Jaime’s worst acts. That hand pushed Bran from the tower. That hand killed and injured countless people. That was the hand that slew a king.

And now it was gone—a tragedy even for the most unlikable of characters. As Brienne put it, “It was one thing to slay a lion, another to hack his paw off and leave him broken and bewildered.”

It’s only when Jaime loses his hand, though, that he becomes open to change. And change he does. He opens up about his difficult past, and about why he has done the things he’s done. He grows to admire Brienne’s honor rather than resent it. And he begins to realize, in contrast, how terrible a person his beloved sister is.

But without the loss of that hand, Jaime wouldn’t have this new outlook on life, and without that, we couldn’t have empathy for him.

Jon Snow

HBO

So far, we’ve seen characters facing congenital disabilities, gender discrimination, moral difficulties, and crippling injuries, but Jon Snow faces a unique form of difficulty—his is purely social.

He’s an illegitimate child.

Ostensibly, Jon Snow is the illegitimate son of Ned Stark, the honorable lord of Winterfell. Knowing that his life will be limited by his social status, he joins the Night’s Watch, a group of exiles who keep watch over the barrier between the world of man and the inhuman evils which lie in the far reaches of the north.

But Tyrion tells him something he never forgets: “Let me give you some advice, bastard: Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armour, and it can never be used to hurt you.”

Indeed, Jon does this. While remaining essentially good and humble, he takes charge, putting on the mantle of the show’s main protagonist—essentially filling the void left by Ned Stark all those episodes ago.

Jon combines everything we love: he began as an underdog with little chance to ever make a difference, rose up as a pragmatic hero, avoided the egomaniacal traps of the “game of thrones,” and might just be the king that Westeros needs—precisely because he doesn’t want the throne.

One thing’s for sure, though: judging by audience reactions he’s certainly the hero we want to win.

Hodor

HBO

There is no tragedy in Game of Thrones like Hodor. Nothing comes close. Universally beloved, this sweet and simple giant graced the lives of viewers everywhere, only to become the cause of millions of broken hearts when he met his grisly end.

Empathy isn’t about feeling sorry for a character. It’s about feeling for a character, about standing in their shoes and understanding what it’s like to be them. It’s about comprehending their challenges, and then cheering when those challenges are overcome—this reminds us that our own difficulties are not insurmountable.

Hodor faced the greatest of challenges in the form of a mental handicap. Only able to say his own name, Hodor possessed the intelligence of a very young child. He was also intentionally kind, nonviolent, and loved those he considered his family.

Of all the characters we get to know in Westeros, he was undoubtedly the purest, and that’s why we loved him so.

But when we found out why Hodor is Hodor, the pain of his death multiplied. When Bran and his companions are pursued by a horde of undead wights, Bran uses his powers to take control of Hodor, using his strength to hold a door against the creatures.

But because Bran reaches back through time to control Hodor through the man’s childhood self, it causes the past version of Hodor to experiences his own death as he is torn apart by the undead in the future, as his companions scream for him to “hold the door.”

The young, past Hodor falls to the ground, convulsing as he experiences his future death, “Hold the door” slowly becoming all that he would ever be able to say: Hodor.

And with this, the audience realizes that each time Hodor says “Hodor,” he’s reliving his own death.

If that doesn’t create empathy, nothing will.

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