Two years ago, Michael and I delivered lectures together at Carnegie Hall, Oxford University, and other places, as part of an effort to get parents to take a more active role in nurturing and raising their children. During the time that I spent in Michael's company, we spoke often of his need, after the '93 allegations especially, to preserve the highest standards of propriety with regard to children. Michael understood and agreed, which is why I was shocked and saddened by his appalling revelation. I passed along a message to Michael last week through a close mutual friend, that rather than defending the practice, or attacking the reporter Martin Bashir, which seems to be Michael's current strategy, he should admit to just how misguided he has been and immediately stop. As a marriage counselor I have been asked many times by husbands whether it was OK to share a bed with another woman, a platonic friend, when there was absolutely no possibility of sex taking place. I made my absolute revulsion for such practices clear. The same is true when it comes to children, if you are not the parent.
Many chart the beginning of the fall of Michael Jackson to the '93 molestation accusations. I find a different starting point. It took place when Sony launched his "History" album in 1995. Accompanying the release were, unbelievably, giant statues of Michael placed in cities all over the world, including London and Prague, as well as a video depicting Michael as a gargantuan idol, complete with thousands of soldier-worshippers at his beck and call. I still remember watching this video with Michael at his Neverland Valley Ranch theater for the first time in August 2000. Michael was reliving the nostalgia of earlier music videos, but I nearly fell off my chair. Here was a man who had been a devout Jehovah's Witness, with an innate, authentic, and deep-seated spirituality, setting himself up as a god. Michael's mother Kathryn spends hours each day reading the Bible, and Michael himself very virtuously went "witnessing" for his church every single Sunday, knocking from door to door to sell the Watchtower magazine even after Thriller had made him the biggest star on the planet. Few people understand just how deeply religious Michael was, and in his own way, still is. But how could a man with such a deep attachment to G-d suddenly make himself into a deity?
I'm not making this into a religious issue or implying that Michael's downfall came about as a result of sacrilege. Rather, what happened to Michael was that once he set himself up as an idol to be adored, it was but a short step to creating his own rules and living by his own set of laws. And if the world says that sleeping with another person's kids is wrong, then the world be damned!
What has led to the gradual erosion of Michael Jackson, a man who at his core is decent, compassionate, and humble, is the belief that he doesn't have to obey any rules. And it's this belief that he lives by a higher law which has led Michael to appalling, out-of-character behavior like calling Tommy Mottola devilish, or publicly humiliating his father and blaming him for all his ills, even though the Bible commands that we must honor our parents, however they may have treated us.